Episoder

  • #433 Married With a Crush?

    #433 Married With a Crush?

    · Love, Happiness and Success with Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

    Friend, this topic is SO important I'm putting it back in front of you again. Here's the deal: Even people in strong, satisfying relationships can develop feelings of attraction for another person. It's part of the human experience. These feelings can be transient and meaningless... OR they could destroy your life, if you follow them.

    Are crushes innocent, or on-ramps to an affair? Can you be "friends" with someone you have a crush on, without risking your relationship? What should you do when you're married, but have a crush on someone else? Oh, the questions!

    It happens: people in happy, healthy, committed relationships can still develop crushes on others. However, smart, self-aware people in committed relationships that they care about need to handle these maturely and with wisdom. That's what you'll learn how to do on today's show. We'll discuss:

    The mechanics of a crush; how and why crushes develop The difference between a crush and a platonic friendship Why happy, committed married people can have crushes on others How crushes can turn into something more serious How to use self awareness, integrity, and honesty to protect your marriage How to use your crush experience in order to add energy and intimacy into your relationship Warning signs that your crush is developing into something else Why extramarital affairs are always a bad idea, and rarely end well How to stop having a crush on someone else How to avoid embarrassment and professional ruin if you have a crush on a coworker How to protect your relationship and stay true to your values even when you're having feelings for another.

    All this and more on today's episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast.

    xoxo,

    Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

    GrowingSelf.com

    Ps: As we discussed in this episode, part of your action plan needs to be leaning towards your partner in an authentic and emotionally intimate way, and that calls for excellent communication skills. To support you in this, please help yourself to my free two part communication skills training, "Communication That Connects." I made this for you! ... LMB

  • #432 How to Stand Up For Yourself, with Dr. Sunita Sah

    #432 How to Stand Up For Yourself, with Dr. Sunita Sah

    · Love, Happiness and Success with Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

    How often do you say "yes" when you really want to say "no"? If you've ever felt that way, you're not alone! Today, we're diving into what happens when you stand up to someone in all areas of life—work, relationships, even healthcare.

    My guest is the incredible Dr. Sunita Sah, an award-winning professor at Cornell and author of Defy: The Power of No in a World That Demands Yes. Dr. Sah's research focuses on why so many of us feel pressured to go along with things we don't believe in and how we can cultivate the courage to say "no" when it matters most.

    In this episode, you'll learn how social norms and "insinuation anxiety" hold us back from standing up for our true selves. You’ll walk away with the confidence to take small, powerful steps toward defiance in a way that feels authentic and empowering.

    Timestamps

    00:22 - Meet Dr. Sunita Sah: Her Story of Transformation

    00:47 - The Psychology of Compliance and Defiance

    01:31 - Defying Social Pressures: Real-Life Stories

    02:07 - Why Compliance in the Workplace Hurts Us All

    07:37 - A Fresh Take on Defiance: It’s Not What You Think

    10:11 - The Social Roots of Compliance

    17:51 - Facing the Inner Blocks to Standing Up for Yourself

    25:32 - Practical Steps to Strengthen Your Defiance Muscle

    33:23 - Living Authentically: The Real Benefits of Saying No

    45:02 - Wrapping Up: Your Takeaways and Resources

    Having low self esteem can make it hard to stand up for yourself. Is this true for you? Find out by taking my free Self Esteem Quiz! You’ll find out where your self esteem thrives and discover new areas for growth. Take it here.

    And, join me for a live Q&A this Thursday at 12 pm MT on YouTube, where we'll be talking all about self-advocacy. Want to submit a question anonymously? Use this link

    PS: Think of someone who could use a boost in self-advocacy? Share this episode with them, and let’s help each other live authentically! ❀

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  • #431 Is a Porn Addiction Destroying Your Relationship?

    #431 Is a Porn Addiction Destroying Your Relationship?

    · Love, Happiness and Success with Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

    Is pornography addiction taking a toll on your life or relationship? You’re not alone, and real help is here! 🙌

    In this episode of Love, Happiness, and Success, I sit down with the incredible Sathiya Sam, founder of the Deep Clean program, to discuss what recovery from porn addiction actually looks like.

    Together, we dive into tough (but crucial) questions: How do you spot the signs of addiction? What does true healing look like for both individuals and couples? And, most importantly, how can you support a partner without losing yourself along the way?

    đŸŽ„ Ready to learn practical strategies for growth, connection, and positive change? Listen now and find actionable steps to help you or your loved one break free from pornography addiction, once and for all.

    Timestamps:

    00:00 – The Hidden Impact of Porn Addiction

    01:03 – Meet Sathiya: From Personal Struggle to Lifelong Mission

    06:21 – Spotting the Warning Signs

    10:46 – The Toll on Relationships and Intimacy

    13:48 – Physical and Emotional Consequences

    18:35 – Healing Betrayal Trauma Together

    21:13 – Steps Toward Lasting Recovery

    22:53 – Three Core Steps to Heal

    23:41 – Building Self-Awareness

    26:40 – How Trauma Shapes Addiction

    30:56 – Supporting Your Partner’s Recovery (Without Losing Yourself)

    36:41 – Long-Term Transformation

    If you or a loved one are ready to break free from porn addiction, I have something to share with you. Recovery starts with connection—and connection starts with communication. My free video training series, Communication That Connects, is here to help you open up, ask for support, and rebuild trust with those who matter most. You don’t have to do this alone.

    Your partner in growth,

    Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

    GrowingSelf.com


    P.S. Don’t miss this week’s live stream on Thursday at 12 pm MT here on YouTube, where we'll dive deeper into porn addiction recovery. Submit your anonymous questions in advance – I’d love to help you find your way forward. 💬

  • #430 Signs You’re Married to a Narcissist (And How to Cope)

    #430 Signs You’re Married to a Narcissist (And How to Cope)

    · Love, Happiness and Success with Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

    Are you walking on eggshells, questioning your sanity, and starting to wonder if your partner’s behavior is actually...narcissism?

    In this episode, we’re diving deep into the challenging and often painful question of whether you might be married to a narcissist. Narcissism isn’t a one-size-fits-all diagnosis; it has shades, nuances, and layers, which can make it tough to recognize and even harder to deal with.

    Chapters:

    00:45 - The Signs You’re Married to a Narcissist

    10:47 - The Two Types of Narcissists: Wounded vs. Malignant.

    19:12 - Inside the Narcissistic Relationship Cycle

    27:00 - Can a Relationship with a Narcissist Work?

    44:42 - Strategies to Navigate Conflicts.

    If you're in a relationship with someone who might be a narcissist, I know how exhausting and frustrating communication can be. That's why I created my free 2-part video training, Communication That Connects. You’ll learn practical tools to de-escalate arguments, protect your emotional well-being, and build healthier patterns of connection, even with difficult personalities. I hope you check it out. ❀

    And don’t forget to join me for this week’s livestream on Thursday at 12 pm MT / 2pm ET on YouTube, where we’ll chat all about being married to a narcissist. You can ask an anonymous question in advance at https://www.growingself.com/dear-lisa.

    If you know someone else who could benefit from this episode, send it over to them! Let’s keep looking out for each other.

    Xo,
    Dr. Lisa

    GrowingSelf.com

  • #429: Can People Change? How To Help Someone Grow

    #429: Can People Change? How To Help Someone Grow

    · Love, Happiness and Success with Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

    Are You Exhausted Trying to Help Someone Who Won’t Change? Here’s What Actually Works!

    Have you ever bent over backward trying to help someone you love, only to feel like you’re getting nowhere? You’re not alone—and I’ve got good news: people can change. But here’s the kicker: they’ll only do it when it comes from within.

    In this episode, I’m breaking down the psychology of change, the stages people go through, and the surprising reason why trying to force change never works (spoiler alert: it usually backfires). You’ll also learn powerful, actionable strategies to:

    ✅ Set healthy boundaries (without guilt).
    ✅ Protect your emotional well-being (because you matter too!).
    ✅ Provide the kind of support that actually encourages growth.

    If you’re ready to stop feeling stuck and frustrated, and instead discover the most effective way to empower someone on their journey—this is for you. 🎧

    Timestamps You’ll Love:
    00:00 – Why It Feels Impossible to Change Someone Else
    01:15 – Can People Really Change? (Yes, But Here’s the Secret)
    03:45 – The Real Power of Intrinsic Motivation
    06:20 – The Stages of Change: Where Your Loved One Might Be
    12:40 – Setting Boundaries That Encourage Growth
    18:55 – Avoiding the Trap of Enabling
    23:15 – Free Tools to Help You and Your Loved One

    BONUS GOODIES!
    👉 Want to help a loved one uncover what’s really holding them back? Share my free What’s Holding You Back? Quiz with them—it’s designed to uncover hidden obstacles, subconscious blocks, and personal strengths to help them move forward with confidence.

    👉 Don’t miss this week’s YouTube Livestream: How to Help Someone Who Doesn’t Want to Help Themselves (Thursday, 12 pm MT). You can even submit an anonymous question ahead of time here: www.growingself.com/dear-lisa.

    This conversation could change everything. See you there! đŸŽ„



  • #428: How to Keep Politics From Destroying Your Relationships

    #428: How to Keep Politics From Destroying Your Relationships

    · Love, Happiness and Success with Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

    Are political differences with people you love threatening to tear your relationships apart? You’re definitely not alone! Today, we’re diving deep into the delicate dance of keeping relationships healthy across political divides.

    In this episode, I’m sharing the strategies to help you navigate tricky conversations with grace, keep your cool, and protect your own happiness along the way. By the end, you’ll know exactly how to preserve the connections you care about most, even when politics threaten to tear you apart. Stick around to the end—I’ve got some free resources to help you practice these skills and share them with your loved ones. Let’s jump in!

    Timestamps:

    00:00 - Are Political Differences Threatening Your Relationships?

    04:22 - Assess the Importance of Each Relationship

    07:32 - Radical Acceptance (It's Tough, But Worth It!)

    11:12 - Emotional Regulation - How to Stay Cool

    16:49 - Focus on the Positives (Yes, Really!)

    23:09 - Set & Maintain Healthy Boundaries

    32:18 - Advanced Skills: Radical Curiosity and Empathy

    39:06 - Free Resources + Final Thoughts

    If you loved this episode, don’t miss the next video in this series! Let’s keep building those relationship skills.

    P.S. Need a little more support? Check out my free Communication That Connects 2-Part Video Series. Also, join me Thursday at 12 pm MT for a live session right here on YouTube on this very topic, how to navigate political differences in relationships. You can even submit an anonymous question right here.

  • #427: How to Fix a Broken Relationship

    #427: How to Fix a Broken Relationship

    · Love, Happiness and Success with Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

    Are you feeling stuck in a cycle of conflict and misunderstanding with your partner? You're not alone—and you're not powerless to fix it! In today’s episode, I’m breaking down how to fix a broken relationship by exploring the underlying patterns that keep couples locked in negative cycles.

    Plus, I’ll share my own story (yes, I’ve been there too) and reveal the key strategies and mindset shifts that can help bring you and your partner back together. If you’ve been trying to make things better but feel like you’re swimming against the tide, tune in for some essential insights and actionable steps to get your relationship back on track

    In this video, we’ll cover:

    0:32 – The Toxic Spiral of Negative Communication

    3:15 – Uncovering the Hidden Patterns

    6:48 – How Negative Cycles Shape Perception

    10:25 – Breaking Free and Finding Real Solutions

    15:45 – When to Seek Help

    Want more guidance on fixing your relationship? Check out my free resource, How Healthy Is Your Relationship Quiz. Using this quiz, you’ll be able to decipher strengths and growth points in your relationship.

    If you want to ask me a question about your relationship, join me this Thursday at 12 pm MT on YouTube for my Livestream about how to fix a broken relationship. Submit your question anonymously here: https://www.growingself.com/dear-lisa. See you there!

  • #426 How to Deal With Disappointment

    #426 How to Deal With Disappointment

    · Love, Happiness and Success with Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

    "This wasn't supposed to happen!"

    Have you ever felt life throw you a curveball so big it knocked you flat? It’s that gut-punch moment when plans unravel, your candidate didn't win, dreams dissolve, and you’re left wondering, “Now what?” In this episode, I’ll take you through the tools and mindset shifts needed to transform disappointment into personal growth. We’ll talk about the power of radical acceptance, why it’s okay to feel all the feels, and how to find the hidden opportunities in setbacks.

    Timestamps:

    00:00 Intro: Life’s Unexpected Curveballs

    01:22 Embracing Disappointment: Feel All the Emotions

    05:46 Finding the Lesson in Loss

    15:23 Radical Acceptance and Moving Forward

    18:36 Steer Clear of Destructive Reactions

    21:16 What Does This Make Possible?

    24:15 Conclusion and Free Resources

    PS: Get free access to my Emotional Wellness Collection, a personally curated podcast and blog collection designed to help you grow and stay well emotionally.

    Also, don’t miss our live Q&A this Thursday at 12 PM MT on YouTube, where we’ll dive even deeper into this topic. Submit an anonymous question in advance here:

    https://www.growingself.com/dear-lisa

    See you there!



  • 425: Intuition? Or Anxiety? How to tell the difference!

    425: Intuition? Or Anxiety? How to tell the difference!

    · Love, Happiness and Success with Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

    How strong is your intuition? Do you trust your inner wisdom? More importantly
 can you tell the difference between intuitive thoughts and anxiety? Today you’re going to learn how to trust your gut!

    In this episode, I’m thrilled to sit down with Brittney Carmichael, intuitive healer and founder of Shine School, as we dig into how to tell the difference between intuition and anxiety, the subtle cues of inner wisdom, and ways to strengthen this instinct into a true superpower.

    Whether you’re an intuitive veteran or someone just starting to listen to that quiet inner voice, this conversation will give you the practical tools you need to better understand, trust, and strengthen your intuitive thought.

    Timestamps:

    00:00 - Intro: Intuition or Anxiety?

    02:23 - Intuition vs. Fear: Brittany’s Insights

    05:14 - Building Intuitive Strength

    10:39 - Brittany’s Journey to Inner Wisdom

    20:24 - Understanding Your Inner Voice

    29:54 - Self-Love as a Foundation for Intuition

    33:02 - Power of Positive Self-Talk

    49:17 - How to Trust Your Inner Wisdom

    *P.S.* Want to dig even deeper? Take the free "What's Holding You Back?" quiz and get clarity on what might be standing in your way. Plus, join me for this week’s Livestream Q&A on Intuitive Thought, Thursday at 12 pm MT,on Instragram, Facebook, or Youtube. Submit an anonymous question in advance here: https://www.growingself.com/dear-lisa.

  • #424 How To Reparent Yourself, with Dr. Dan Siegel

    #424 How To Reparent Yourself, with Dr. Dan Siegel

    · Love, Happiness and Success with Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

    Ever feel like the love, support, or security you needed growing up was just
 missing? And now, you’re feeling the effects in your relationships, your self-esteem, or even your ability to create the life you *really* want? If this hits home, don’t worry—you’re not stuck!

    This week I’m joined by THE legendary Dr. Dan Siegel, and we’re diving deep into the powerful process of reparenting yourself. Together, we’re going to show you how to rewire your brain for emotional healing, break free from past patterns, and build healthy, fulfilling relationships.

    ✹ In this episode, you’ll learn:

    - How childhood experiences shape your adult life (but don’t define it!)

    - The healing power of contingent communication in relationships

    - Practical strategies like the *Wheel of Awareness* for personal growth

    - The importance of presence over perfection in parenting—and in life!

    Chapters:

    00:00 Introduction to Emotional Healing

    02:41 The Importance of Childhood Development

    06:29 Understanding Contingent Communication

    13:55 The Impact of Early Experiences on Adult Life

    14:31 Healing from the Past

    20:12 Developing Healthier Relationship Patterns

    21:19 Understanding Temperament and Personality

    23:35 The Enneagram and Attachment Insecurity (Really!)

    27:09 Practical Techniques for Personal Growth

    30:25 The Role of Agency, Bonding, and Certainty

    35:33 Achieving Wholeness and Integration

    38:26 Resources and Final Thoughts

    🌟 Want more? Grab this free resource I created for you: a curated collection of all my best articles and podcasts on attachment, emotional healing, and healthy relationships at https://www.growingself.com/connections/.

    And
 drumroll please! Join me for this week’s live Q&A on Thursday at 12 pm MT on Youtube, Instagram, and/or Facebook where I’ll be talking about emotional healing and reparenting yourself!

    Got a question? Ask me anonymously in advance using this link: https://www.growingself.com/dear-lisa

    Let’s grow together! đŸŒ±

    Love,

    Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

  • #423 How to Handle Toxic Friends, with Dr. Marisa Franco

    #423 How to Handle Toxic Friends, with Dr. Marisa Franco

    · Love, Happiness and Success with Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

    Ever feel like your friendship is taking more out of you than it gives? If you’ve ever found yourself stuck in a relationship that feels draining, toxic, or just plain bad, you’re in the right place. In this episode of Love, Happiness & Success, I’m sitting down with Dr. Marisa Franco, a brilliant psychologist and bestselling author of Platonic, to talk about one of the toughest aspects of relationships—knowing when a friendship is no longer serving you.

    Together, we’ll dive into the signs of toxic friends, how attachment styles play a role in our friendships, and whether or not these kinds of relationships can be saved. You’ll learn practical strategies to spot the red flags, approach difficult conversations with kindness and clarity, and—if it comes to it—find the courage to end friendships that have run their course.

    Here’s what we cover:

    [00:00] The Friendship Trap: Why difficult friendships are harder to leave than romantic ones. [03:57] Attachment Styles in Friendships: How your past impacts your present friendships. [11:40] Making Positive Changes: How to recognize toxic patterns and start healing. [17:34] Conflict or Goodbye? How to assess if this friendship can be saved. [28:21] Deciding to End a Friendship: When enough is enough, and how to let go with grace.

    If you’ve ever wondered whether a friendship is worth fighting for or it’s time to walk away, this episode is for you.

    Ready to dig deeper? Take my free self-esteem quiz to see how your self-worth might be impacting your relationships: How Healthy is Your Self-Esteem?

    Also, I’d love for you to join me for this week’s YouTube Livestream on Thursday at 12 pm MT, where we’ll talk even more about navigating toxic friendships. Submit an anonymous question in advance right here: Dear Lisa. I’ll see you there!

    — Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

  • Does Your Therapist Talk About THEMSELVES Too Much??

    Does Your Therapist Talk About THEMSELVES Too Much??

    · Love, Happiness and Success with Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

    Does your therapist talk too much about themselves during YOUR sessions?

    This is a common issue, and it can really get in the way of your work. They’re on your dime, and your time with them should be all about you—not an outlet for them. Frankly, knowing too much about your therapist can even be a barrier to positive outcomes.

    The reality is, we therapists are human, and we have our own personal and professional growth trajectories. That’s why I’ve created a new side project: Love, Happiness, and Success for Therapists.

    In one of my latest episodes, I had a big sister-style heart-to-heart with therapists about how to contain their own "stuff"—because if we don’t, it can splash onto our clients. And I wanted to share this episode with you so you could share it with them.

    Here ya go: https://www.growingself.com/self-disclosure-in-therapy-how-much-is-too-much/

    Use it as a way to start a courageous conversation with your therapist about what you need, what you want, and what’s working—or not working—in your relationship. Plus, you’ll be providing them with a resource that supports their growth. Win, win, win!

    If you’re a therapist reading this, I have so much for you! Connect with me at growingself.com/therapists to access this episode and many more on how to flourish and thrive in this career we all love.

    xoxo,

    Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

  • #422: How Long Does it REALLY Take To Get Over an Ex?

    #422: How Long Does it REALLY Take To Get Over an Ex?

    · Love, Happiness and Success with Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

    Breakups are brutal. I know you're wondering, “How long will it take before I finally feel like myself again?” Trust me, you’re not alone. In this episode, we’re diving deep into the million-dollar question: How long does it really take to get over a breakup? And, even more importantly, what do you need to DO in order to move forward and not get stuck in the past?

    I'm joined by Kendra Allen, the amazing host of Breakup Bestie, and together we unpack the factors that impact your healing timeline. Spoiler alert: it’s different for everyone! But we’ve got insights, personal stories, and actionable advice to help you make sense of your own process and feel more empowered as you heal.

    We’re covering everything from how long it takes to feel "okay" again, to why some relationships hurt more than others, and how to know if you’re truly moving on. Plus, Kendra shares her journey of transformation after addiction and abusive relationships, offering you hope that growth is possible—even when it feels like the pain of heartbreak will never end.

    Join us to learn about:

    00:00 – The Hardest Question After a Breakup: How Long Will This Take?
    05:40 – Kendra’s Story: From Addiction to Empowerment
    12:19 – Why Some Breakups Take Longer to Heal Than Others
    19:32 – The Emotional Rollercoaster: What Healing Really Looks Like
    29:00 – Handling Triggers: Holidays, Anniversaries & More
    37:15 – How to Know if You’re Truly Healing or Just Surviving
    45:20 – Next Steps: Tools and Advice for Moving On

    If you’re hurting after heartbreak, this one’s for you. Thanks for tuning in, and/or for sharing this episode with a friend or loved one who is feeling stuck in heartbreak, and needs some direction for how to move forward.

    xoxo,

    Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

    PS: Want to see how far along you are in your breakup recovery? Take my free quiz, How Over Your Ex Are You? 👉 Take the Quiz

    Join me for a live Q&A this Thursday at 12 PM MT on YouTube, where we’ll tackle the topic of Getting Over Your Ex. Submit your questions anonymously in advance ( Ask Here)

    Or just jump into the conversation on Instagram, Facebook, or YouTube. See you there!

  • #421 How to Overcome Rejection (And Turn It Into The BEST Thing That Ever Happened To You - Really!))

    #421 How to Overcome Rejection (And Turn It Into The BEST Thing That Ever Happened To You - Really!))

    · Love, Happiness and Success with Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

    Friend, partner, or job said "thanks but no thanks"? Well, the joke's on them: If you know how to mine the gold in this opportunity it could wind up being the best thing that’s ever happened to YOU.

    And... Rejection sucks. Whether it’s from a friend, a romantic partner, or a job you really wanted, it can leave you feeling bruised and wondering, “Is it just me?” Guess what? It’s not just you, and it’s not the end of the world (promise!). 🌟 In fact, rejection can be the key to unlocking your most resilient, powerful self. Yeah, I said it!

    Join me as I break down the very real emotions behind rejection and share how you can use it as a springboard for serious personal growth. We’ll cover how rejection shows up in your personal, professional, and social life—and how to cope, heal, and come out stronger on the other side. Ready to transform those “no’s” into growth? Let’s do this! 🙌

    What We’ll Cover:

    00:00 - Rejection Feels Awful, But... Why rejection hits so hard and why it’s universal.

    02:42 - Resilience & Growth: Your New Best Friends - Turning setbacks into setups for your future self.

    12:47 - Friendship Rejection: Why Does This Hurt So Much? Handling the emotional sting of being ghosted or left out by friends.

    20:28 - Heartbreak Hotel: Dealing with Romantic Rejection Why getting dumped can hurt on a primal level and how to come out of it stronger.

    43:42 - Career Flops: Professional Rejection and What to Do Next Didn’t get the job? Fired? Here’s how to bounce back like a boss. đŸ’Œ

    51:45 - Your Rejection Recovery Plan: Next Steps Actionable strategies to heal and grow from any kind of rejection.

    đŸ”„ Bonus: Want to chat about your own experiences with rejection? Jump into this week’s live stream where we’ll be swapping stories, getting advice, and supporting each other! đŸ—“ïž Submit your questions in advance right here. Want to start doing the work we're discussing today? Book a free consultation for coaching at GrowingSelf.com.

    xoxo,

    Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

    #RejectionRecovery #EmotionalResilience #LoveHappinessSuccess #PersonalGrowth

  • #420:

    #420: "I Have No Sex Drive!" Dr. Ruth's Advice For Reigniting Intimacy

    · Love, Happiness and Success with Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

    Let’s get real for a minute—have you ever found yourself thinking, "I have no sex drive," and feeling completely stuck about what to do next? You’re not alone. So many people are struggling with this exact issue, and today, I’m diving deep into why that happens, how it affects your relationship, and most importantly—what you can do about it.

    In this episode, I’m joined by Allison Gilbert, co-author with the iconic Dr. Ruth Westheimer on her last book "The Joy of Connections." We’ll explore how a lack of intimacy in your relationship can leave you feeling lost, but we’re also unpacking Dr. Ruth’s brilliant “menu for connection.” It’s full of ways to reignite your bond—not just in the bedroom, but through shared activities, better communication, and ultimately, deeper self-reflection.

    We’ll tackle some tough love truths (like the role self-love plays in intimacy), and I’ll share actionable strategies to help you reconnect with your partner, starting today.

    Episode Breakdown:

    [00:00] – Where’s the Spark?
    Why so many people feel disconnected from their partners—and how it happens more often than you think.

    [00:47] – Dr. Ruth’s Secret Sauce
    The first thing to check when your sex drive is gone—your relationship dynamics!

    [02:09] – It’s Not Them, It’s You?
    The surprising role self-love plays in keeping intimacy alive.

    [03:47] – The “Menu for Connection”
    Five elements Dr. Ruth swears by to build a richer, more meaningful connection with your partner.

    [05:47] – Fun Outside the Bedroom
    How activities like pickleball (yes, pickleball!) could reignite the flames of passion.

    [08:06] – What’s Really Going On?
    Digging deeper: how emotional barriers like resentment might be blocking your connection.

    [12:41] – Therapy or Time to Move On?
    When it’s time to seek help—or even consider a bigger decision.

    [15:41] – You Deserve Better
    Dr. Ruth’s empowering message: You deserve happiness, fun, and great sex—don’t settle for less.

    [17:16] – Let’s Wrap This Up!
    Final thoughts and inspiration to help you take that first step toward a better, more intimate relationship.

    Tune in, share your thoughts, and let’s create a life full of love, connection, and fun together!

    Xoxo,
    Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

    P.S. ⭐ Ready for more? ⭐
    Download my free guide, "Communication that Connects," to start having meaningful conversations that build closeness in your relationship. And don’t forget to join me for this week’s live stream on Thursday at 12 PM MT—we’ll dive even deeper into intimacy and connection. Submit your anonymous questions ahead of time right here!

    P. P.S: Who else in your life needs to hear this message today? Forward this episode to them and feel good about being a positive “change agent” in the lives of others. You and I are on the same mission my friend! Xo, L

  • #419: Why Making Friends as an Adult is so HARD... and How to Cultivate a Community

    #419: Why Making Friends as an Adult is so HARD... and How to Cultivate a Community

    · Love, Happiness and Success with Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

    Where did everyone go?? At some point, many/most adults look up one day to realize that all their old friends have either moved to Austin or are completely buried in #babylife or never-ending home improvement projects
 and they have nobody to spontaneously get a beer with on a Tuesday night. Can you relate?

    It's not just you. Did you know that, on average, most people lose more friends every year than they gain? Over time, your life can become increasingly lonely unless you’re actively working to build and maintain friendships. But here’s the thing: making new friends as an adult is harder than it sounds. 😅

    In this episode of Love, Happiness, and Success, we dive deep into the complexities of adult friendships with journalist Kelly Stout, who spent a month trying to make just one new friend
 and learned some important things that she’s sharing with YOU. From the unexpected emotional hurdles to the surprising lessons about vulnerability and connection, we explore what it really takes to form meaningful relationships in adulthood. 💛

    If you’ve ever struggled with loneliness, wondered why your social circle shrinks as the years go by, or just feel stuck when it comes to making new friends, this episode is for you. 🙌

    Chapters
    00:00 Can Happiness Really Be Found Through Friendships?
    00:19 Why Your Friendships Are More Important Than You Think
    00:58 Meet Kelly Stout: Her One-Month Quest to Make a New Friend
    02:30 What Happens When You Set a Deadline to Make a Friend?
    04:58 The Hidden Challenges of Building Friendships as an Adult
    12:55 What Actually Defines a True Friendship?
    15:40 Friendship Experiments: What Works and What Doesn’t
    18:32 Why Opening Up to Others Feels So Scary—And Necessary
    22:33 The Biggest Lessons We Learned About Friendship
    25:01 When Friendships Feel Fleeting: Why It Happens
    25:45 Vulnerability Hangover: Ever Felt It? Here’s Why It Happens
    25:56 Turning Points: When You Realize You’re Doing Friendship All Wrong
    26:33 Can You Fast-Track Emotional Intimacy? Let’s Find Out
    27:18 Why We Gravitate Toward People Just Like Us—And What to Do About It
    27:45 Discovering the Power of Friendships with People Who Are Different
    28:19 The Comfort and Complexity of Long-Term Friendships
    29:53 Bumble for Friends: Can You Really Make Friends on an App?
    32:01 How Internalized Shame is Holding You Back from Friendship
    34:03 The Reality of Keeping Friendships Alive as an Adult
    43:57 Why We Crave Community—and How to Build One
    47:01 Modern Loneliness: Why Life is Designed to Keep Us Isolated
    53:44 Final Reflections: How to Create Real Friendships That Last

    💡 Learn how to overcome the struggles of making friends as an adult and build a community that brings joy and connection back into your life.

    xoxo,

    Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

    PS: I think you and I should be friends! Come hang out with me on a Thursday live stream! Mark your calendar right now, it's at 12pm MT / 2pm ET on my Instagram, Youtube, and Facebook. This week we're talking about friendships. If you have a question or conundrum related to this, here's the link to ask in advance: https://www.growingself.com/dear-lisa. Be sure to subscribe/follow so you get updates and recaps!

    P.P.S. As promised in this podcast, here's the link to grab your totally free and VAST collection of all my best articles and podcasts on the subject of healthy relationships. I made it for YOU.

  • #418: Are You Making Major Relationship Mistakes Without Realizing It?

    #418: Are You Making Major Relationship Mistakes Without Realizing It?

    · Love, Happiness and Success with Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

    Could you be accidentally and unintentionally DESTROYING your relationship? Pro tip from a marriage counselor: Many, many people are... and literally have no idea.

    I think I know why. Everyone with an Instagram account is posting things about what they think you should do to have a great relationship—communication tips, romantic date ideas, etc.—but let’s be real... sometimes, it's more important to know what NOT to do! And nobody talks about that!!

    That’s why today, we’re flipping the script on the usual relationship advice you hear. đŸ’„

    In this episode, we’re breaking down the 12 Most Effective Ways to Destroy Your Relationship (so you can avoid them like the plague).

    Trust me, as a marriage counselor, I’ve seen it all. Whether it’s neglecting your partner or constantly blaming your “issues” when you behave badly, even the strongest couples can unknowingly make these mistakes. But don’t worry, I’m not here to throw shade—I'm here to help you laugh, learn, and most importantly, grow! đŸŒ±

    By the end of this, you’ll not only recognize these pitfalls, but also walk away with actionable tips to make sure you’re NOT sabotaging your love life. 🙌

    Here's what you'll learn: ⏱

    00:00 Intro: The 12 Biggest Relationship Mistakes

    02:36 Mistake #12: Making the Relationship ALL About You

    04:36 Mistake #11: Blaming Everything on Your Issues

    08:26 Mistake #10: Neglecting Your Partner (The Silent Killer)

    11:20 Mistake #9: Too Much Togetherness (Yikes!)

    And all the way down... to the number one biggest relationship killer!

    💬 Let’s talk: Have you fallen into any of these traps? What’s one mistake you’re guilty of? Drop a comment on Instagram @drlisamariebobby —I’d love to hear from you!

    AND if you want to get my perspective on some not-so-fantastic things that might be happening in your relationship (and how to make it stop) join me on Thursday for a live stream on this topic! Use this link to ask your Q and get reminders to join on Thursday at 12 pm MT / 2pm ET. https://www.growingself.com/dear-lisa

    If you're feeling like, "uh oh" after hearing this... you're not alone! I’ve helped thousands of couples turn things around, and you can too. 🌟

    Xoxo,
    Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

    💡 PS: If you're ready to start working on some positive new communication tools after hearing about the not great ones, check out my FREE training, “Communication That Connects” — it’s packed with tools to help you strengthen your connection and communicate like a pro!

  • #417: Natural Anxiety Relief feat. Dr. Nicole Cain

    #417: Natural Anxiety Relief feat. Dr. Nicole Cain

    · Love, Happiness and Success with Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

    🎧 Forget Everything You Knew About Anxiety – This Changes Everything! 🎧

    Ever feel like anxiety has a grip on your life? Here’s the game-changing truth: You can heal anxietyy, not just manage the symptoms. đŸ’„ In this transformative episode of the Love, Happiness, and Success podcast, I sit down with the brilliant Dr. Nicole Cain, a holistic anxiety expert and author of the upcoming book Panic Proof, to discuss a revolutionary approach to healing anxiety from the inside out. đŸŒ±

    👉 Imagine freeing yourself from anxiety by nurturing your body, mind, and soul. Together, we dive into practical strategies that blend psychology and holistic medicine to uncover the root causes of anxiety and address them at the deepest level. We even explore how anxiety shows up in relationships and, yes, even in the bedroom!

    💡 What You'll Learn Today:

    00:00 The Truth About Healing Anxiety, Naturally

    00:18 Dr. Nicole's Story

    12:28 Understanding Anxiety and Its Roots

    19:22 Esme’s Story: A Powerful Case Study

    33:54 Anxiety in Relationships & Sexuality

    42:43 Dr. Nicole's Three-Minute Hack for Instant Anxiety Relief

    50:39 How the Salience Network Impacts Anxiety

    54:30 VERY Generous Offer from Dr. Nicole!

    ✹ And... I'm so thrilled to share that Dr. Nicole will be my guest host on this week's live stream, and available to answer YOUR questions. Join us Thursday 9/5 at 12 PM MT on my YouTube, Instagram, or Facebook. Want a reminder or to ask a Q in advance? Get that set up right here: www.growingself.com/dear-lisa. 🙌

    If you missed the chance to hop on with us LIVE you can catch the recap video right here starting 9/6: https://www.growingself.com/natural-anxiety-relief

    đŸŽ„ Don’t forget to like, subscribe, and share this episode with anyone you know who’s struggling with anxiety—this could be the breakthrough they’ve been waiting for!

    Your partner in growth,

    Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

    GrowingSelf.com

  • #416 Why Your Therapist is Weird: Behind The Scenes

    #416 Why Your Therapist is Weird: Behind The Scenes

    · Love, Happiness and Success with Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

    Wondering why your therapist acts a little... strange? What are all those long, awkward silences about? Why won't they follow you on social media? You made DIRECT EYE CONTACT with them at the grocery store but they didn't acknowledge your presence. Why?? In this episode, we’re diving into the surprising truth behind therapist boundaries and why they matter for your personal growth.

    In this episode of Love, Happiness, and Success, I’m pulling back the curtain on some of the “weird” things therapists do (like, why won’t they just give you a hug already?!), and why those boundaries are actually super important for your healing journey.

    We’ll also break down the difference between therapy and coaching, why therapists never give direct advice, and how these boundaries create a safe, effective space for you to thrive. Plus, I’m sharing insights that will help you build a strong, healthy relationship with your therapist. If you're in therapy, you’ll walk away with some major a-ha moments!

    Timestamps:

    00:00 - Let’s Get Real: Why Do Therapists Have Such Weird Boundaries?
    02:25 - The Surprising Power of Therapist Boundaries
    06:43 - Why Your Therapist Won’t Steer the Conversation (Hint: It’s for YOU)
    09:10 - Therapist vs. Coach: Which One Do You Really Need?
    12:35 - The Ethics Behind the Scenes: How Good Therapists Keep You Safe
    24:25 - Why Your Therapist Stays Neutral (Even When It Feels Weird)
    31:55 - Session Time Limits & Contact Rules—What’s Up with That?
    35:51 - The Secret to a Healthy Therapist-Client Relationship
    45:44 - Wrap Up: Final Thoughts and Takeaways

    Wanna Learn More?

    Signs You Have a Bad Therapist

    How to Find a Good Therapist

    Don’t forget to like, subscribe, and hit the bell so you never miss an episode on all things therapy, coaching, and personal growth! Let’s keep this conversation going! 💖

  • #415 How To Become More CONFIDENT

    #415 How To Become More CONFIDENT

    · Love, Happiness and Success with Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

    Ready to shake off low self esteem for good, and grow into the confident, competent person you want to be? Good news: Confidence isn't born, it's BUILT, meaning you have more control over how you feel about yourself than you might think.

    On today’s podcast you’ll learn the essence of authentic self-worth, and how to grow into the kind of person that exudes confidence (in a good way). As a licensed psychologist, marriage and family therapist, and board-certified coach, I’m sharing why confidence isn’t just a feeling you magically have—it’s something you build through consistent, value-driven actions.

    Together, we’ll explore practical ways to develop self-respect, trust your judgment, and foster a deep-rooted belief in your worth. Whether you're looking to overcome self-doubt or grow into the confident person you aspire to be, this episode offers steps you can start taking today.

    Here’s what you’ll learn:

    00:00 Introduction to Authentic Confidence

    01:43 Understanding Authentic Confidence


    04:23 Building Confidence Through Actions


    06:12 Overcoming Misconceptions About Confidence


    07:53 Identifying and Aligning with Your Values


    13:26 Personal Story: The Journey to Self-Respect


    17:10 Developing a Growth Mindset


    34:50 Practical Tips for Exuding Confidence


    44:42 Conclusion and Free Resources

    Want more guidance? Join me LIVE on Thursday for a Q&A, where I’ll answer your questions about building confidence and self-esteem. Submit your questions in advance through https://www.growingself.com/dear-lisa for personalized advice!

    Don’t forget to take our free "How Healthy Is Your Self-Esteem?" quiz at https://www.growingself.com/self-esteem-test/ to see where you stand and discover next steps for boosting your self-worth.

    See you there! 👏đŸ’Ș #Confidence #SelfEsteem #ExudeConfidence #PersonalGrowth #LiveQandA #GrowingSelf

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