Episoder

  • Today we talk about the science of attachment styles inspired by the book "Attached" by Amir Levine and Rachel S.F. Heller. This book has revolutionized how I approach all of my relationships. These are my reasons why you should read this book and how I now use it to healthfully allow people to be as they are.

    REFERENCES:
    Attached written by Amir Levine and Rachel S.F. Heller
    Disordered Attachment Article

    Support the Show.

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    Isaac Etter's IDENTITY (Equipping parents, Empowering Children)
    Black Hair Care
    Guide to Transracial Adoption

    ADOPTEE CONVERSATIONS WITH PARENTS:
    14 through18, and episode 28, and 29.

    WATCH PANELS: Here!

    JAMES BALDWIN'S ESSAY ON "WHITENESS":

    HISTORY of the word “Colored”:
    ...

  • Today our guest is Shelby Redfield Kilgore who is a two time Emmy award-winning filmmaker and author of the blog, “Behind the Lens” and also co-writer of the book “Rooted in Adoption: A Collection of Adoptee Reflections”.

    Today's topics:

    Her filmmaking and how she found her artistic voiceHow the stories she collects have informed her own adoption journeyThe societal pressures of single mothers in Korea and The resentment that surfaced toward her culture because of what happened to her mother.The imperative of adoptive parent’s get thorough education before adoptingAnd her courage through her Breast cancer journey

    GUEST: Shelby Redfield Kilgore
    https://www.wearemirrorlight.com/

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    Isaac Etter's IDENTITY (Equipping parents, Empowering Children)
    Black Hair Care
    Guide to Transracial Adoption

    ADOPTEE CONVERSATIONS WITH PARENTS:
    14 through18, and episode 28, and 29.

    WATCH PANELS: Here!

    JAMES BALDWIN'S ESSAY ON "WHITENESS":

    HISTORY of the word “Colored”:
    ...

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  • Today we have author, activist, podcaster, and educative content creator Melissa Guida Richards; who was also a guest on episode 6 ,and a panelist on my 2020 panel series. A lot has happened since we last chatted a few years ago; Melissa's second book launched and her tik tok / IG platforms now have a huge following of people who want to learn more.
    Topics today include:

    The ramification of Separating siblingsHer relationship with her adoptive mother, and what it was like to be on the Cameron Hall show with her adoptive mother. What it means to filter content through an anti-racist lensHer work in the adoption community and her strategy to make lasting and systemic change. The harm of Social media platforms that advertise children and the dangers of pre-birth matchingRe-homing children on the internet (AKA human trafficking)We also talk about birth parents in crisis and the laws around their rights. She gives advice on how to protect your children’s story when you’re a parental content creator. How to not over-shareAnd then we finish with tips on how to not minimize the adoptee experience

    GUEST: Melissa Guida Richards
    adopteethoughts.com
    Melissa's Workbooks

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    DISCOUNT FOR 15% GUIDE BOOKS:
    Isaac Etter's IDENTITY (Equipping parents, Empowering Children)
    Black Hair Care
    Guide to Transracial Adoption

    ADOPTEE CONVERSATIONS WITH PARENTS:
    14 through18, and episode 28, and 29.

    WATCH PANELS: Here!

    JAMES BALDWIN'S ESSAY ON "WHITENESS":

    HISTORY of the word “Colored”:
    ...

  • Today I speak with poet, artist, and activist matthew anthony. Matthew has a podcast called "Little Did You Know" and a vibrant poetry book called "You Can Not Burn The Sun."

    We discuss:
    - Reclaiming ones name
    - Rehoming and separating siblings
    - What "with-ness" is in regards to solidarity
    - And the resiliency of a black spirit brought up in a Sun Down town

    GUEST: matthew anthony
    https://drum.io/cantburnthesun?fbclid=IwAR0XqFmMZsW8-XJwJO4UiyiJugu-LIgsbWJIt9UMHj-vtGBOCU9reHZk8N4

    REFERENCES:

    James Baldwin “The Fire Next Time”

    .

    Support the Show.

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    DISCOUNT FOR 15% GUIDE BOOKS:
    Isaac Etter's IDENTITY (Equipping parents, Empowering Children)
    Black Hair Care
    Guide to Transracial Adoption

    ADOPTEE CONVERSATIONS WITH PARENTS:
    14 through18, and episode 28, and 29.

    WATCH PANELS: Here!

    JAMES BALDWIN'S ESSAY ON "WHITENESS":

    HISTORY of the word “Colored”:
    ...

  • Today, we speak with Lorah Gerald (aka The Adopted Chameleon). It was a delight to have a light worker with such a profound grasp of a plethora of healing modalities. Lorah is a trauma-informed Kundalini Yoga instructor, Intuitive, Tarot & Tea reader, and Reiki healer. You can find her on Instagram @theadopteechamelean sharing her gifts as a healer through movement and mindful practices.

    We talk about:

    The adoption summit she attended called “Untangling Our Roots”Lorah’s Medium energy workerHer Kundalini Yoga practiceThe healing powers of wearing colors to brighten your moodThe Baby Scoop era that she was born into and the complexities of same race adoption. The difference between acute trauma, chronic trauma and complex traumaHow she became “The Adoptee Chameleon”We end with how you can change your energy through breath work, where she leads us through practice.

    GUEST: Lorah Gerald

    My website,

    https://lorahgerald.com/

    My linktree,

    https://linktr.ee/Lorahwg

    REFERENCES:

    https://untanglingourroots.org/

    Poisonwood Bible by Barbara Kingsolver

    Support the Show.

    CONNECT WITH HOST:
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    @lantoines
    www.laniseantoineshelley.com

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    DISCOUNT on WeUNIK Cosmetic Hair products
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    Link: https://weunikworld.com/discount/WTWY

    DISCOUNT FOR 15% GUIDE BOOKS:
    Isaac Etter's IDENTITY (Equipping parents, Empowering Children)
    Black Hair Care
    Guide to Transracial Adoption

    ADOPTEE CONVERSATIONS WITH PARENTS:
    14 through18, and episode 28, and 29.

    WATCH PANELS: Here!

    JAMES BALDWIN'S ESSAY ON "WHITENESS":

    HISTORY of the word “Colored”:
    ...

  • Today it’s just me.This month has been many things for me. Officially it’s Mental Health awareness month and Asian, Asian American, Pacific Islander Heritage Month. I want to take the time to honor both things. First I’ll tell you why Mental Health awareness is so imperative on a personal level and on a community level.

    REFERENCES:

    Film One Child Nation

    Asian Nation Blog

    https://www.asian-nation.org/index.shtml

    Asian American Contributions:

    https://www.nyxt.nyc/blog/asian-american-pacific-american-heritage-5-facts/

    Transracial Adoption statistics:

    https://brandongaille.com/21-gripping-transracial-adoption-statistics/

    Support the Show.

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    DISCOUNT FOR 15% GUIDE BOOKS:
    Isaac Etter's IDENTITY (Equipping parents, Empowering Children)
    Black Hair Care
    Guide to Transracial Adoption

    ADOPTEE CONVERSATIONS WITH PARENTS:
    14 through18, and episode 28, and 29.

    WATCH PANELS: Here!

    JAMES BALDWIN'S ESSAY ON "WHITENESS":

    HISTORY of the word “Colored”:
    ...

  • Today's guest is Lori May Mier who is the author of Marin and Her Very Bright Star; a story of resiliency which is available on her website. She also is an activator in her community. Find out why I use the word "activator" instead of "activist" in the episode.
    We talk about:

    The difference between Grief and lossNarrative therapy and how reimagining your story can change your perspectiveLori's experience with parental lossThe abuse Lori endured at the hands of her caregiversLori shares how generational grief shows up in parentingLori unpacks what it means to witness ones own courageous evolution

    GUEST: Lori May Mier
    https://www.bluemountainpathcoaching.com/

    Support the Show.

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    DISCOUNT FOR 15% GUIDE BOOKS:
    Isaac Etter's IDENTITY (Equipping parents, Empowering Children)
    Black Hair Care
    Guide to Transracial Adoption

    ADOPTEE CONVERSATIONS WITH PARENTS:
    14 through18, and episode 28, and 29.

    WATCH PANELS: Here!

    JAMES BALDWIN'S ESSAY ON "WHITENESS":

    HISTORY of the word “Colored”:
    ...

  • My guest today is Nelson De Witt who is an author, film maker and technologist. This conversation was fascinating. Nelson was born in El Salvador and raised here on East Coast. We discuss:

    -Coping mechanisms for his Dyslexia (and my dyslexia, because we both have it)
    - Joseph Campbell’s Heroes Journey, which is the most prevalent template for stories that involve a hero. The hero goes on an adventure, is victorious in battle, and comes home changed or transformed.
    -The complexities of reunifying with his biological family and how he balances both worlds of adoptive and biological relatioships-
    - What it means to be “Disappeared” and trust me it’s not anything you’ve heard of before.

    GUEST: Nelson De Witt
    https://nelsonroberto.com/

    REFERENCES:
    Joseph Campbell’s Heroes Journey
    Dyslexic No More by Lauren Douglas
    Finding Forrestor Quote

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    Isaac Etter's IDENTITY (Equipping parents, Empowering Children)
    Black Hair Care
    Guide to Transracial Adoption

    ADOPTEE CONVERSATIONS WITH PARENTS:
    14 through18, and episode 28, and 29.

    WATCH PANELS: Here!

    JAMES BALDWIN'S ESSAY ON "WHITENESS":

    HISTORY of the word “Colored”:
    ...

  • This week it's all me. I discuss healing the inner child and how that has benefited my life. There are many ways to go about it this powerful work. Listen and find out how incredibly useful it can be to acknowledge and connect with ones inner children.


    REFERENCES:
    What is An Inner Child & What Does It know
    https://integrativepsych.co/new-blog/what-is-an-inner-child#:~:text=Your%20%E2%80%9Cinner%20child%E2%80%9D%20is%20a,and%20dreams%20for%20the%20future.

    10 Exercises to Heal Your Inner Child
    https://psychcentral.com/health/how-to-heal-your-inner-child

    Finding and Getting to Know The Inner Child
    https://www.healthline.com/health/inner-child

    Joe Dispenza
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oFB6KDftGPY

    Support the Show.

    CONNECT WITH HOST:
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    @lantoines
    www.laniseantoineshelley.com

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    DISCOUNT on WeUNIK Cosmetic Hair products
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    Link: https://weunikworld.com/discount/WTWY

    DISCOUNT FOR 15% GUIDE BOOKS:
    Isaac Etter's IDENTITY (Equipping parents, Empowering Children)
    Black Hair Care
    Guide to Transracial Adoption

    ADOPTEE CONVERSATIONS WITH PARENTS:
    14 through18, and episode 28, and 29.

    WATCH PANELS: Here!

    JAMES BALDWIN'S ESSAY ON "WHITENESS":

    HISTORY of the word “Colored”:
    ...

  • Today's guest, Nikki Webster is the illustrator Nikki Often, heart warming comics that "Punch you in the gut." We discuss the following:

    Allowing your child to sleep with you for as long as possibleNikki's work comicsWhat is a "miracle of tenacity"How to overcome feelings of not being enough as we both dabble in public speaking.

    GUEST: Nikki Webster
    https://www.nikkioften.com/
    @nikkioften

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    DISCOUNT FOR 15% GUIDE BOOKS:
    Isaac Etter's IDENTITY (Equipping parents, Empowering Children)
    Black Hair Care
    Guide to Transracial Adoption

    ADOPTEE CONVERSATIONS WITH PARENTS:
    14 through18, and episode 28, and 29.

    WATCH PANELS: Here!

    JAMES BALDWIN'S ESSAY ON "WHITENESS":

    HISTORY of the word “Colored”:
    ...

  • Today's guest is the author, film maker and coach, Anne Heffron. Anne wrote “You Don’t Look Adopted,” “Making a Mess: Writing and Pooping,” “Truth Agency: Writing Ideas for people who were adopted,” and she co-wrote the film “Phantom Halo.” Anne facilitates writing workshops and retreats designed to empower, instill confidence and make people excited to be alive.

    We discuss:

    Approaching life and trauma from an angleAdoptee's relationship with Enough-ness and financial securityHow yoga and other healing modalities have shaped our livesWhat it means to be extraordinary vs ordinary

    GUEST: Anne Heffron
    https://www.anneheffron.com/

    Support the Show.

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    Link: https://weunikworld.com/discount/WTWY

    DISCOUNT FOR 15% GUIDE BOOKS:
    Isaac Etter's IDENTITY (Equipping parents, Empowering Children)
    Black Hair Care
    Guide to Transracial Adoption

    ADOPTEE CONVERSATIONS WITH PARENTS:
    14 through18, and episode 28, and 29.

    WATCH PANELS: Here!

    JAMES BALDWIN'S ESSAY ON "WHITENESS":

    HISTORY of the word “Colored”:
    ...

  • Today I speak with Isaac Etter, a social entrepreneur, transracial adoptee, founder of Identity a startup focused on using technology to help foster and adoptive families thrive, and the owner of a small business strategy agency called, Etter Consulting. Identity is dedicated to equiping parents so that the children are empowered.
    GUEST: Isaac Etter
    https://isaacetter.com/

    RECOURCES:
    Heart and Mind Therapy

    15% Discount links below!!!

    Support the Show.

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    @youngadoptee
    @lantoines
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    DISCOUNT FOR 15% GUIDE BOOKS:
    Isaac Etter's IDENTITY (Equipping parents, Empowering Children)
    Black Hair Care
    Guide to Transracial Adoption

    ADOPTEE CONVERSATIONS WITH PARENTS:
    14 through18, and episode 28, and 29.

    WATCH PANELS: Here!

    JAMES BALDWIN'S ESSAY ON "WHITENESS":

    HISTORY of the word “Colored”:
    ...

  • Our guest Emma Stevens is an mother, trainer and the author of "The Gathering Place: An adoptee's Story" and newly released, "A Fire is Coming." We unpack the uses of the healing modality, EMDR Therapy (eye movement desensitization and reprocessing), and she touches on her tumultuous childhood with her adoptive parents, the gift of learning how to take up space, Benefits of tapping as another tool of healing, how she chose life after years of alcoholism, and how deconstructing belief systems led to writing her book, and thereby teaching her how to help others get unstuck. And finally she breaks down how to self-publish a book, step by step.

    GUEST: Emma Stevens
    @Emmastevenswriter
    https://linktr.ee/emmastevenswriter

    Support the Show.

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    DISCOUNT on WeUNIK Cosmetic Hair products
    15% off Code: WTWY

    Link: https://weunikworld.com/discount/WTWY

    DISCOUNT FOR 15% GUIDE BOOKS:
    Isaac Etter's IDENTITY (Equipping parents, Empowering Children)
    Black Hair Care
    Guide to Transracial Adoption

    ADOPTEE CONVERSATIONS WITH PARENTS:
    14 through18, and episode 28, and 29.

    WATCH PANELS: Here!

    JAMES BALDWIN'S ESSAY ON "WHITENESS":

    HISTORY of the word “Colored”:
    ...

  • Today's guest, Patrick Armstrong (he/him) discusses creating his podcasts and what that entails, how he builds empathy with and for the community outside of the adoption constellation, and how "adoptee" is an identity that one inhabits. We also delve into what differentiates an activist from advocate and how he navigates the construct of "whiteness".

    Patrick is an adoptee from Korea, a podcaster, speaker, and community facilitator. He is one of the hosts of the Janchi Show, a podcast that explores and celebrates the experiences and stories of Korean adoptees . Patrick is a producer and editor on the Dear Asian Americans podcast. He is also the cofounder of the Asian Adoptees of Indiana.

    GUEST: Patrick Armstrong
    Website: https://www.patrickintheworld.me
    Instagram: @patrickintheworld
    TikTok: @patrickintheworld
    LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/patrickintheworld
    Podcasts:
    - The Janchi Show (Host)
    - Dear Asian Americans (Producer)
    - Conversation Piece with Patrick Armstrong (Host)

    REFERENCES:
    Book:
    Building A Story Brand

    Lewis Howes "School of Greatness" Podcast
    Episode 1409


    Support the Show.

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    DISCOUNT on WeUNIK Cosmetic Hair products
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    DISCOUNT FOR 15% GUIDE BOOKS:
    Isaac Etter's IDENTITY (Equipping parents, Empowering Children)
    Black Hair Care
    Guide to Transracial Adoption

    ADOPTEE CONVERSATIONS WITH PARENTS:
    14 through18, and episode 28, and 29.

    WATCH PANELS: Here!

    JAMES BALDWIN'S ESSAY ON "WHITENESS":

    HISTORY of the word “Colored”:
    ...

  • We start this season off with a one-on-one "calling in." I talk about the adverse affects of conflict avoidance and the true promise of accountability.

    REFERENCES:
    Victoria Albina "Feminine Wellness"
    https://victoriaalbina.com/podcast/

    Calling In vs calling Out
    https://edib.harvard.edu/files/dib/files/calling_in_and_calling_out_guide_v4.pdf?m=1625683246

    Support the Show.

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    @lantoines
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    DISCOUNT on WeUNIK Cosmetic Hair products
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    DISCOUNT FOR 15% GUIDE BOOKS:
    Isaac Etter's IDENTITY (Equipping parents, Empowering Children)
    Black Hair Care
    Guide to Transracial Adoption

    ADOPTEE CONVERSATIONS WITH PARENTS:
    14 through18, and episode 28, and 29.

    WATCH PANELS: Here!

    JAMES BALDWIN'S ESSAY ON "WHITENESS":

    HISTORY of the word “Colored”:
    ...

  • This is the last episode in Season 3! Hoorah! And before we go on a short hiatus, I want to breakdown why and what I mean by "Where can you apply courage?" and "Courage, my love." This word is the the bedrock of this work, so let's find out why.

    References:
    Brene Brown
    William Ernest Henley "Invictus"

    Support the Show.

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    @lantoines
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    DISCOUNT FOR 15% GUIDE BOOKS:
    Isaac Etter's IDENTITY (Equipping parents, Empowering Children)
    Black Hair Care
    Guide to Transracial Adoption

    ADOPTEE CONVERSATIONS WITH PARENTS:
    14 through18, and episode 28, and 29.

    WATCH PANELS: Here!

    JAMES BALDWIN'S ESSAY ON "WHITENESS":

    HISTORY of the word “Colored”:
    ...

  • Today’s guest is Sandy White Hawk who is the Executive Director at First Nations Repatriation Institute. She and I take the gloves off with this one. We discuss white supremacy in indigenous communities, systematic removal and problematic placements of adoptees, changing of adoptee names, and what unconditional love looks like. The mainstream doesn’t talk about what happens when the adoptee is adopted into an unsafe or unsupportive household. You hear stories of re-homing because the child had special needs or didn’t get along with the biblical children, but conversely the adoptive child’s perspective is just as valuable and needs to be brought to the forefront.

    Guest: Sandy White Hawk

    www.wearecominghome.org



    Support the Show.

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    DISCOUNT FOR 15% GUIDE BOOKS:
    Isaac Etter's IDENTITY (Equipping parents, Empowering Children)
    Black Hair Care
    Guide to Transracial Adoption

    ADOPTEE CONVERSATIONS WITH PARENTS:
    14 through18, and episode 28, and 29.

    WATCH PANELS: Here!

    JAMES BALDWIN'S ESSAY ON "WHITENESS":

    HISTORY of the word “Colored”:
    ...

  • Julie McGue graces my podcast today. We talk about the journey she took to write the extraordinary memoir, “Twice A Daughter” with her twin sister. Julie and I delve into the challenge of asking adoptive parents for adoption information, and how important it is to know your medical history. She also found some kismet moments where writing her story opened new up conversations and opportunities for healing

    GUEST: Julie McGue

    https://juliemcgueauthor.com/

    Angela Rye:

    Comments on Supreme Court ruling on abortion:

    https://www.instagram.com/tv/CfM3g_qDgYs/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link

    Amand Wooston (Episode 10):

    https://www.instagram.com/amandawoolstonadoption/?hl=en

    Melissa Guida Richards (Episode 6):

    https://www.instagram.com/adoptee_thoughts/?hl=en

    Dr. Cam Lee Smalls:

    https://www.instagram.com/therapyredeemed/?hl=en

    Support the Show.

    CONNECT WITH HOST:
    @youngadoptee
    @lantoines
    www.laniseantoineshelley.com

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    DISCOUNT FOR 15% GUIDE BOOKS:
    Isaac Etter's IDENTITY (Equipping parents, Empowering Children)
    Black Hair Care
    Guide to Transracial Adoption

    ADOPTEE CONVERSATIONS WITH PARENTS:
    14 through18, and episode 28, and 29.

    WATCH PANELS: Here!

    JAMES BALDWIN'S ESSAY ON "WHITENESS":

    HISTORY of the word “Colored”:
    ...

  • My guest today is Lina Vanegas who is an advocate for Displaced adoptee rights, mental health awareness, suicide prevention and is also the co-host of the podcast “Rescripting The Narrative”. We discuss how war is a prime opportunity for displaced children ending up in the adoption cycle, what advocacy can looking like in the adoption community, and suicide preventions for adoptees.

    GUEST: Lina Venegas
    @linaleadswithlove
    Rescripting The Narrative Podcast
    https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/rescripting-the-narrative/id1577193193

    Support the Show.

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    @lantoines
    www.laniseantoineshelley.com

    SPONSORSHIPS:
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    DISCOUNT on WeUNIK Cosmetic Hair products
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    Link: https://weunikworld.com/discount/WTWY

    DISCOUNT FOR 15% GUIDE BOOKS:
    Isaac Etter's IDENTITY (Equipping parents, Empowering Children)
    Black Hair Care
    Guide to Transracial Adoption

    ADOPTEE CONVERSATIONS WITH PARENTS:
    14 through18, and episode 28, and 29.

    WATCH PANELS: Here!

    JAMES BALDWIN'S ESSAY ON "WHITENESS":

    HISTORY of the word “Colored”:
    ...

  • Our guest today, Sara Easterly is an author and essayist who wrote a spiritual memoir called “Searching for Mom”. She writes about adoption, parenting, and grief through the lens of her Christian faith. We go into how using faith to justify adoption can make adoptees feel alienated and insignificant by framing adoption as a “blessing”. And her answer to my final question “where to apply courage” was one of my favorites. Let's lean in!

    GUEST: Sara Easterly
    https://saraeasterly.com/

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    CONNECT WITH HOST:
    @youngadoptee
    @lantoines
    www.laniseantoineshelley.com

    SPONSORSHIPS:
    BetterHelp Show Link HERE!

    DISCOUNT on WeUNIK Cosmetic Hair products
    15% off Code: WTWY

    Link: https://weunikworld.com/discount/WTWY

    DISCOUNT FOR 15% GUIDE BOOKS:
    Isaac Etter's IDENTITY (Equipping parents, Empowering Children)
    Black Hair Care
    Guide to Transracial Adoption

    ADOPTEE CONVERSATIONS WITH PARENTS:
    14 through18, and episode 28, and 29.

    WATCH PANELS: Here!

    JAMES BALDWIN'S ESSAY ON "WHITENESS":

    HISTORY of the word “Colored”:
    ...