Episodes
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What if joy itself is a form of protest? In this episode, Denise and Jackie reflect on a powerful week marked by national unrest, a shared birthday, and what it means to find moments of joy and connection amidst political chaos.
Key Times:00:00:00 – Welcome back + gratitude breathwork
00:01:36 – Celebrating their shared birthday and reflecting on protest energy
00:04:33 – Street vending, community care, and giving out goldfish
00:06:05 – Angel City FC: surprise seats, frosé, and emotional moments
00:08:27 – “Immigrant City FC” shirts and the bittersweet game
00:13:42 – Denise’s 60th birthday party: tarot, tacos, and radical joy
00:17:43 – Jackie’s Scholastic-style book fair and curated party favors
00:21:02 – Crack Krispies and charcuterie: making joy delicious
00:24:30 – Political tension, privilege, and community protection
00:30:26 – Announcing 12 Steps for Everyone virtual meetings
00:33:37 – Jackie is off to grad school! Overwhelm and transition talk
00:35:20 – Closing thoughts: showing up anyway, with fresh breath
Show Notes / Episode Summary:In this richly layered episode, Denise and Jackie bring listeners into a week of deeply personal and collective reflection. From participating in a massive protest against state violence to throwing an intentionally joyful, women-centered birthday celebration, they unpack what it means to hold rage and gratitude in the same breath.
Denise turns 60 and goes all out - hosting a dreamy day of tacos, tarot, books, and body positivity. Jackie surprises her with a meticulously curated “adult Scholastic book fair” filled with crystals, claw clips, finger massagers, and more. But even in the joy, they remain grounded in the reality that many people can’t access such safety and celebration, especially as immigrant communities across LA face escalated threats and disappearances.
They reflect on the ethics of privilege, how to support others while staying spiritually regulated, and what it means to keep showing up for joy when the world is on fire. The episode ends with an invitation to join their virtual Sunday meetings and a reminder that showing up, fully and honestly, is revolutionary.
Topics Covered:Finding joy during times of political and social unrestMutual aid and small acts of protest supportThe emotional complexity of celebrating in hard timesBuilding women-centered spaces of delight and healingImmigrant labor, fear, and solidarity in LAThe balance of grief, activism, and joyCreating a book fair, party favors, and rituals of careEmpathy collapse and why joy is not frivolousJackie’s upcoming move for grad school + Denise’s tech training
Follow Us:Follow Jackie: @jackiefreed.laFollow Denise: @denise.freedFollow us on Instagram: @12stepsforeveryoneFollow us on TikTok: @12stepsforeveryone
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What if deciding to trust was the most radical thing you could do? In this episode, Denise and Jackie reflect on stepping into big transitions, staying grounded in community, and why choosing gratitude can change everything—even in the middle of a literal tornado.
Key Times:00:00:00 – New grounding practice: reading the 12 Steps for Everyone
00:03:35 – Upcoming travel, big transitions, and “quality problems”
00:05:00 – Trusting Universal Mother and standing in your own knowing
00:09:10 – Gratitude as a decision, not just a feeling
00:13:20 – Sobriety, service, and showing up for people who want help
00:16:20 – Supply chains, small businesses, and political ripple effects
00:22:00 – Grad school tornado: Jackie’s literal and emotional test
00:26:30 – Sprinting through work stress and finding your rhythm
00:29:20 – Human design talk: manifestors, generators, and collaboration
00:33:00 – Cozy spirituality: building new language for inner work
00:38:30 – Launching the online 12-step-inspired meetings
00:43:10 – Looking ahead: retreats, questions, and community connections
00:49:00 – You’re a miracle, drink some water
Show Notes / Episode Summary:In this cozy and expansive episode, Jackie and Denise explore what it means to move forward with intention when life feels big and unpredictable. Jackie has officially chosen her grad school path, and in true Emergency Protocol fashion, was immediately tested with a literal tornado. They unpack what it means to trust yourself (and the universe) when your plans feel messy, delayed, or questioned by others.
Denise opens up about choosing gratitude on purpose and how that shift has grounded her even while work feels overwhelming. They both reflect on the pressure of perfectionism, the labor of logistical backends, and the freedom of finding what’s natural to you. From the emotional clarity of the ACA serenity prayer to the spiritual reset of service, this episode is full of practical reflections, vulnerable laughter, and community invitations.
Listeners also get the first official announcement of their new online community meetings, inspired by the 12 Steps for Everyone.
Topics Covered:How to root into self-trust during chaotic transitions
Choosing gratitude as a daily spiritual practice
The push/pull of parenting adult children
The emotional aftermath of grad school decisions
Human design and embracing your natural workflow
Creating new language for healing and introspection
The launch of an online community space rooted in shared growth
Staying connected through service, even when spread out
Follow Us:Follow Jackie: @jackiefreed.la
Follow Denise: @denise.freed
Follow us on Instagram: @12stepsforeveryoneFollow us on TikTok: @12stepsforeveryone
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Missing episodes?
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What if being overwhelmed is the beginning of something great? In this episode, Denise and Jackie explore what it means to sit in uncertainty, embrace possibility, and stay grounded while navigating huge life transitions.
Key Times:00:00:00 – A grounding breath and a quick disclaimer
00:02:12 – Jackie gets into grad school! Processing the surprise
00:05:29 – Decision-making anxiety and the infamous undergrad coin toss
00:10:20 – Logistics spiral: moving, driving, renting, storage, the dog
00:14:00 – Denise reflects on decision-making as a catalyst
00:21:00 – Facing change with curiosity instead of fear
00:24:00 – Grieving the shift as Jackie prepares to leave LA
00:29:00 – Spiritual resets, purposeful activism, and staying regulated
00:36:00 – Creativity, community, and finding the next expression of self
00:38:00 – The podcast continues! A look ahead at remote collaboration
Show Notes / Episode Summary:In this heartfelt episode, Denise and Jackie reflect on Jackie’s acceptance into not one, but two graduate school programs—both out of state. What should be an exciting moment is also fraught with the anxiety of big choices, logistical chaos, and emotional goodbyes.
Jackie opens up about the shock of getting in (despite a sub-3.0 GPA), the validation of receiving scholarships, and the layered overwhelm of what's to come: deciding between programs, planning a move, and figuring out how to bring her dog across the country. Denise reflects on how different this version of Jackie is from the young adult who once flipped a coin to choose her undergrad—and what it means to make decisions rooted in self-trust.
The conversation weaves between personal growth, political tension, community building, and spiritual practice. From somatic resets at 11:11 to book recommendations and AA reflections, they hold space for both the fear of the unknown and the freedom it can bring.
Topics Covered:The shock, relief, and joy of grad school acceptance
The emotional labor of big life changes
Decision fatigue and choosing from abundance
Rejection tolerance and the power of perseverance
Staying spiritually grounded in times of crisis
Activism, burnout, and choosing balance
Creating new rituals and community around growth
Looking ahead: how the podcast will evolve with Jackie’s move
Follow Us:Follow Jackie: @jackiefreed.la
Follow Denise: @denise.freed
Follow us on Instagram: @12stepsforeveryone
Follow us on TikTok: @12stepsforeveryone
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Key Times:
00:00:00 – Introduction: It’s been a while! Catching up after months away
00:06:45 – The January fires: Devastation, grief, and survival
00:12:30 – Leading through crisis: Denise’s real estate world turned upside down
00:18:05 – Finding community: Donation efforts and mutual aid
00:26:30 – Jackie’s grad school applications and career shifts
00:30:40 – A car gets towed: Navigating unexpected hurdles
00:36:10 – Moments of unexpected kindness: A soap dish and a bouquet
00:42:00 – Closing thoughts: Gratitude, deep breaths, and looking ahead
Show Notes / Episode Summary:In this emotionally charged episode, Denise and Jackie return after an extended hiatus, reflecting on what has been an unbelievably intense year. From devastating wildfires that left entire communities displaced to personal struggles with leadership, career changes, and even a chaotic car towing experience, they unpack the rollercoaster of events that defined the past several months.
Denise shares her firsthand experience of managing a real estate team through an unprecedented disaster, recounting the overwhelming grief and logistical challenges of helping clients and colleagues find stability in the aftermath of the fires. Jackie, on the other hand, navigates her own major life transitions, from leaving her grocery job to re-entering real estate full-time—all while applying to grad school and dealing with self-doubt along the way.
Through it all, they highlight the small moments of kindness and connection that helped them persevere, including a touching encounter involving a simple soap dish and a gifted bouquet. They close the episode with a grounding breathwork exercise, encouraging listeners to reflect on gratitude and resilience in their own lives.
Topics Covered:Processing grief and trauma after natural disastersThe complexities of leadership during crisis situationsThe challenges of re-entering real estate in an unpredictable marketNavigating self-doubt and imposter syndrome in grad school applicationsThe unexpected stress of getting a car towed (and the financial burden that comes with it)Finding joy in small, everyday acts of kindnessCultivating resilience through community and mutual aidFollow Us:Follow Jackie: jackiefreed.la Follow Denise: @denise.freed Follow us on Instagram: -
In this warm and thought-provoking episode, Denise and Jackie dive deep into the emotional and logistical chaos of the holiday season. Reflecting on their own family traditions—past and present—they explore how expectations around gift-giving, decorating, and hosting have evolved, especially after the loss of a beloved matriarch and the realities of aging and burnout.
00:00:00 – A grounding breath and physical therapy insight
00:04:45 – Catching up post-Thanksgiving and holiday expectations
00:11:20 – Family Christmas traditions: scaling back and shifting values
00:19:30 – Generational money trauma and financial insecurity
00:27:40 – Women, labor, and holiday inequities across generations
00:36:20 – The invisible work of motherhood and holiday planning
00:44:00 – Reclaiming the holidays with boundaries and potlucks
00:50:00 – A daily ACA reflection and asking for help
Denise reflects on her financial anxiety despite being in a secure position, and the generational patterns that might be keeping that stress alive. Jackie brings in insights from their ongoing ACA (Adult Children of Alcoholics) work, especially around inherited financial trauma and the societal conditioning that teaches women to carry the mental load without complaint.
They touch on capitalism, the pink tax, the mental load of working mothers, and the invisible labor that makes the holidays “magical.” From packed shopping carts at Costco to fighting over tree lights, the episode is both funny and deeply resonant for anyone navigating family dynamics, societal expectations, and the holidays with their sanity intact.
Topics Covered:
The pressure and privilege of hosting family holidays
How grief, generational trauma, and family traditions intersect
Scaling back gift-giving and reimagining meaningful rituals
Financial insecurity and inherited beliefs around money
Gendered labor and the unpaid work of making holiday “magic”
ACA reflections on recreating stress for familiarity
Decentering men in conversations about equity and responsibility
The value of asking for help and building true community
The Big One podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-big-one-the-earthquake/id1645620672?i=1000579734783
ACA Serenity Prayer: https://adultchildren.org/serenity-prayer/
Follow Us:
Follow Jackie: https://www.instagram.com/jackiefreed.la/
Follow Denise: https://www.instagram.com/denise.freed/
Follow us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/12stepsforeveryone/
Follow us on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@12stepsforeveryone
Email us: [email protected]
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In this vulnerable post-election episode, mother-daughter duo Denise and Jackie process their raw emotions following the November 2024 election results. The conversation opens with a grounding mindfulness practice and box breathing technique (breathe in for 4, hold for 4, out for 4, hold for 4) as they acknowledge the difficulty many are experiencing.
The pair explore how to maintain presence and calm during anxiety-producing times, with Denise emphasizing the Serenity Prayer as her anchor: “God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.” Jackie shares her Adult Children of Alcoholics (ACA) version: “God grant me to accept the people I cannot change, the courage to change the one I can, and the wisdom to know that one is me.”
The conversation takes a thoughtful turn as they discuss values conflicts, self-advocacy in healthcare relationships, and the challenge of reconciling deeply held beliefs with maintaining human connection across divides. Jackie shares her experience of ending a therapeutic relationship after realizing their values alignment was crucial for her mental healthcare.
The episode concludes with an exciting announcement of their new Sunday Zoom meetings at 6pm Pacific time, creating a safe space for people to process difficult emotions and find community during challenging times.
Topics Covered:
Mindfulness techniques including box breathing and the 5-4-3-2-1 exerciseUsing the Serenity Prayer as a practical tool during stressful timesThe importance of being present in the body during anxietyTheir updated Step 3: “We decide to trust that something bigger is taking care of us”Self-advocacy in therapeutic relationshipsCreating inclusive community spaces for authentic conversationBalancing political values and human connectionThe daily practice of Step 10: ongoing reflection and emotional processingJoin our upcoming meetings: https://forms.gle/4VxnNUnev1RoRJMCA (Zoom meeting on Sunday at 6pm PST, the meeting is password-protected so please fill out the form to receive the link and password!)
The Big One podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-big-one-the-earthquake/id1645620672?i=1000579734783
ACA Serenity Prayer: https://adultchildren.org/serenity-prayer/
Follow Us:
Follow Jackie: jackiefreed.la Follow Denise: @denise.freed Follow us on Instagram: @12stepsforeveryone Follow us on TikTok: @12stepsforeveryone
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Denise and Jackie discuss how they approached the run-up to the election and the importance of staying positive in times of uncertainty. The Serenity Prayer is great for extra support. Jackie shares the techniques she is using to calm her elevated anxiety. It’s all in the breath! Denise then goes into her experience of asking for a sign from her brother and receiving it in a surprising way during a Zoom call.
The duo reflects on the community spirit Halloween invites and how they celebrated this year. Jackie discusses the importance of having an earthquake preparedness kit. Starting to build hers has significantly curbed her anxiety about a potential event. Jackie mentions a podcast that helped her understand that natural disasters are more about people helping each other rather than chaos and violence. Following the success of a second in-person meeting, they are hosting an online meeting! Be sure to sign up below.
If you’re interested in being a future podcast guest or want to attend our meetings (once they’re up and running), send us an email at [email protected] with your thoughts and any other questions you have! We can’t wait to hear from you. We’ll see you soon.
Topics Covered:
No harm in positivity Power of breathShow me a mongooseSeeking joy and levityPotato or candy?Immigration and competition Earthquake preparationConscious breathResources Mentioned:
Join our upcoming meetings: https://forms.gle/4VxnNUnev1RoRJMCA (Zoom meeting is password-protected; please submit your email to receive it)Godmothers bookstore1440The Big One podcastFollow Us:
Follow Jackie: jackiefreed.la Follow Denise: @denise.freed Follow us on Instagram: @12stepsforeveryone Follow us on TikTok: @12stepsforeveryone
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Content Warning: This episode discusses suicide and may be distressing for some listeners.
Denise and Jackie reflect on their first in-person meeting, which started awkwardly but became fluid as the ice melted. They’re so happy to have brought to life a welcoming, neutral, and free space for people to attend, share, and feel heard. The meeting was one of the many commitments Denise has been juggling lately. She acknowledges that while being part of a community is valuable, so too are rest and balance.
They then reflect on the third step of the 12 steps, the importance of deciding to commit to recovery. Each woman shares her personal experience of choosing to live and seek help. Both professionally and personally, having a supportive place to go to makes all the difference. They then discuss the concept of affinity groups. There is potential for affinity groups to emerge naturally from the community they created. Even though it has sometimes felt slowgoing, they reflect on the progress their community has made as well as themselves on their journeys.
If you’re interested in being a future podcast guest or want to attend our meetings (once they’re up and running), send us an email at [email protected] with your thoughts and any other questions you have! We can’t wait to hear from you. We’ll see you soon.
Topics Covered:
First in-person meeting Balancing commitments and communityH.A.L.T.Role of decision in recoveryThe not-so-gray areaShift into actionImportance of connection and belongingResources Mentioned:
Join our upcoming meetings: https://forms.gle/4VxnNUnev1RoRJMCAACA https://adultchildren.org/AA https://www.aa.org/Follow Us:
Follow Jackie: jackiefreed.la Follow Denise: @denise.freed Follow us on Instagram: @12stepsforeveryone Follow us on TikTok: @12stepsforeveryone
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Denise shares her last days in the hospital together with her grandmother. While it was heavy and emotional, of course, she explains why she did not feel depleted by the grief. Denise and Jackie discuss the importance of telling the people you love that you love them and the different ways of doing so. Jackie talks about saying goodbye to her grandma while at a wedding and recent mental health updates. She is looking forward to an upcoming trial with Ritalin even though trying a new medication brings anxiety.
Denise then shares how the book, Fire, We Make the Beast Beautiful, has made her feel at peace with her anxiety. Ultimately, living any kind of life, a healthy, happy one, or a chaotic one, is a choice. A staple of joyous living is being part of a community. They agree that the effort and vulnerability required to genuinely connect are absolutely worth it.
If you’re interested in being a future podcast guest or want to attend our meetings (once they’re up and running), send us an email at [email protected] with your thoughts and any other questions you have! We can’t wait to hear from you. We’ll see you soon.
Topics Covered:
Denise’s hospital experience Showing people you love themSaying goodbye at a weddingBeginning RitalinOutrunning anxietyACA meeting explorationThe hard work of livingThe healing power of togethernessResources Mentioned:
Join our upcoming meetings: https://forms.gle/4VxnNUnev1RoRJMCAStay tuned for a "diagnosed but mom said no" hat giveaway!ACA https://adultchildren.org/AA https://www.aa.org/Follow Us:
Follow Jackie: jackiefreed.la Follow Denise: @denise.freed Follow us on Instagram: @12stepsforeveryone Follow us on TikTok: @12stepsforeveryone
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Denise and Jackie jump right into Jackie’s ADHD diagnosis history and possible signs from her childhood that she had ADHD. They then turn to the upcoming holiday season and the social anxiety often accompanying celebratory gatherings. New situations, in general, can summon socially anxious feelings in even the most outgoing people. Denise shares a recent experience attending a new meeting, reflects on the social anxiety she felt in the past of trying to come off as sexually appealing, and how those insecurities impacted her perceived self-worth.
Jackie is preparing to begin dating again but is first working through a few specific limiting beliefs. She updates Denise on a recent trip to Portland to visit a good friend and how her friend treated her so well that she feels inspired to be a better friend. They then discuss the nuances of giving and receiving, sometimes feeling more comfortable on one side than the other, and how being of service is the ultimate antidote to feeling low.
If you’re interested in being a future podcast guest or want to attend our meetings (once they’re up and running), send us an email at [email protected] with your thoughts and any other questions you have! We can’t wait to hear from you. We’ll see you soon.
Topics Covered:
#DiagnosedButMomSaidNoStressy and depress-y AKA social anxietyAttending an ACA meeting Difference between nervous, anxious, and social anxietyPreparing to dateHow to be a friendThe nuances of giving and receivingResources Mentioned:
Join our upcoming meetingsStay tuned for a "diagnosed but mom said no" hat giveaway!ACAAAFollow Us:
Follow Jackie: jackiefreed.la Follow Denise: @denise.freed Follow us on Instagram: @12stepsforeveryone Follow us on TikTok: @12stepsforeveryone
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Denise and Jackie go in on connection. Denise shares her joyous experience at Godmothers Bookstore, learning from and being in the presence of amazing, powerful women. A part of the joy was from being in a high-functioning third space. As the presidential election draws closer, Denise organizes a get-together with friends to write postcards to swing states, simultaneously creating a connecting activity and a feeling of participation.
Jackie updates us on how week six of her new medication is going. She feels lighter and more upbeat while also being aware of the extra layer of responsibility that is keeping up with the required scheduling. She’s even picked up meditating again!
Denise shares how she is rediscovering the importance of doing things during her rest time that bring her soul joy, no matter how busy she has been lately. However, she is still reserving days for vacation at home. There can be a fine line between joy and depletion. Trusting your intuition on whether something will add to or take away from a restful experience takes practice and awareness.
If you’re interested in being a future podcast guest or want to attend our meetings (once they’re up and running), send us an email at [email protected] with your thoughts and any other questions you have! We can’t wait to hear from you. We’ll see you soon.
Topics Covered:
Godmothers Bookstore experience Importance of connection pre-electionMedication, maintenance, and meditation Getting things doneFree fries and getting out thereAdvocate for yourself no matter whatResources Mentioned:
Godmothers Bookstore https://godmothers.com/Getting Things Done by David Allen https://gettingthingsdone.com/ACA https://adultchildren.org/Al-Anon https://al-anon.org/AA https://www.aa.org/Follow Us:
Follow Jackie: jackiefreed.la Follow Denise: @denise.freed Follow us on Instagram: @12stepsforeveryone Follow us on TikTok: @12stepsforeveryone
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As the seasons start to shift, so do Denise and Jackie. The pair discuss the upcoming election season, experiences of grief, and Jackie’s ADHD diagnosis.
With the bumpy month of August behind them, election season looms. This is a friendly reminder to everyone listening to vote! While Denise and Jackie digress that they don’t have as much time as they did during the last election, which was mid-pandemic, they are still doing their part to get the word out for everyone to show up to the polls. However, they disagree on the state of societies post-pandemic and share what they each see as the highs and lows of post-pandemic culture. Jackie shares how her favorite mantra continues to support her during this time.
Denise shares how this time of year brings up sadness about the loss of her brother that her body flags before her mind. She shares funny childhood memories, while Jackie shares a different sort of childhood memory. They discuss the many ways people experience grief and the importance of maintaining boundaries during that process.
Jackie then updates us on how her new medication is going. She also provides insight into her current routine and the challenges of adjusting to new habits. They both have been people-ing a lot more lately and feeling considerably lighter.
If you’re interested in being a future podcast guest or want to attend our meetings (once they’re up and running), send us an email at [email protected] with your thoughts and any other questions you have! We can’t wait to hear from you. We’ll see you soon.
Topics Covered:
02:02 Candy corn hot takes
05:18 Vote!!
9:52 Pandemic reflections
18:32 Returning to the mantra
20:17 Remembering Damon
30:27 No is a sentence
35:18 Medication update
40:32 More people-ing
47:52 ADHD diagnosis
Resources Mentioned:
Check your voter registration statusMetropolis IIFollow Us:
Follow Jackie: jackiefreed.la Follow Denise: @denise.freed Follow us on Instagram: @12stepsforeveryone Follow us on TikTok: @12stepsforeveryone
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After getting a new depression and anxiety prescription in the last episode, Jackie follows up with how she is adjusting. She’s started to make a great effort to get out of the house to be with her friends and shares a strategy she’s using to do that. Meanwhile, Denise has been busy helping her other daughter move, juggling new changes at work, and organizing a sober retreat. This year’s retreat was as busy and beautiful as ever, including a life celebration of her former sponsor, Claire. Despite a packed schedule, Denise has been prioritizing rest among the chaos.
Following a few synchronicities, Jackie checked out Al-Anon for the first time. She shares a passage from Al-Anon's big blue book. The experience has been a catalyst for momentum across her life, at her own pace, which is worth celebrating! Denise shares her enthusiasm and recognizes the role of accountability for making progress in all areas of life. Jackie then shares her experience of going to ACA for the first time. They discuss an underlying theme across 12 step programs, which is ultimately taking responsibility for yourself.
If you’re interested in being a future podcast guest or want to attend our meetings (once they’re up and running), send us an email at [email protected] with your thoughts and any other questions you have! We can’t wait to hear from you. We’ll see you soon.
Topics Covered:
00:49 New meds update
07:11 Organizing a sober retreat
21:32 Jackie goes to Al-Anon for the first time!
31:50 Jackie goes to ACA for the first time!
44:29 Being scared and doing the thing anyway
Resources Mentioned:
Register for virtual and in-person 12S4E meetings AA meeting directoryAl-Anon meeting directory ACA meeting directory Courage to Change - One Day at a Time in Al-AnonReshma SaujaniFollow Us:
Follow Jackie: jackiefreed.la Follow Denise: @denise.freed Follow us on Instagram: @12stepsforeveryone Follow us on TikTok: @12stepsforeveryone
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As Denise juggles a hectic schedule and prepares to host a sober retreat, Jackie continues to feel not okay. They discuss the infinite shapes anxiety and depression can take in people and how it defies logical sense. Jackie shares her recent experience of surrendering and asking for help, making doctor’s appointments, and switching medication. There are a lot of factors to consider when switching medication, and Jackie explains her anxieties around a few of them.
Denise suggests reframing some of Jackie’s fears about the future. Being present can feel like the safest place to live, though it is often the hardest place to find. Sometimes, taking medication helps Jackie to find that present place. The bottom line is that change can be hard, really hard. In those times, there’s nothing wrong with external validation. That can take the form of affirmations from friends and family to getting an achievement chip at an AA meeting.
Ultimately, Jackie’s willingness to try medication again is a win. Every small step towards change is a win. Denise and Jackie wrap the episode by celebrating that win and giving loving affirmations to the audience.
If you’re interested in being a future podcast guest or want to attend our meetings (once they’re up and running), send us an email at [email protected] with your thoughts and any other questions you have! We can’t wait to hear from you. We’ll see you soon.
Topics Covered:
00:22 Denise has been busy!04:25 Acknowledging negatives and positives07:45 Depression and obsession 16:25 Looking for community 18:29 Anxieties about new medication25:25 Fears of the future34:27 Change is hard!Resources Mentioned:
Join our meetings: https://forms.gle/4VxnNUnev1RoRJMCAFollow Us:
Follow Jackie: jackiefreed.la Follow Denise: @denise.freed Follow us on Instagram: @12stepsforeveryone Follow us on TikTok: @12stepsforeveryone
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Jackie talks about her recent experience of realizing she needed additional help, selecting a new therapist, signing up for mental health coaching, and obtaining a psychiatrist referral. While taking action is a great first step, that doesn’t mean it feels easy.
Denise shares her experiences of seeking help. For her, the waiting game is incredibly tedious and, sometimes, offputting. But there is growth! Like when she willingly waited in lines in Japan… She received a lot of help from AA through sponsorship. They discuss anonymity's role in those relationships and the responsibility of being a container for someone.
The duo wraps up by discussing what’s been happening lately in their lives and how to chip away at the piles of to-do’s. They continue to get closer to the launch of their in-person meetings, which they hope will be a great place for people to take that courageous first step of asking for help. Be sure to sign up below if you’re interested in attending!
If you’re interested in being a future podcast guest or want to attend our meetings (once they’re up and running), send us an email at [email protected] with your thoughts and any other questions you have! We can’t wait to hear from you. We’ll see you soon.
Topics Covered:
(01:09) Back to square one: getting help
(05:48) Juggling referrals and new therapist meetings
(12:13) Waiting in lines in Japan
(19:56) Sponsorship help in AA
(24:38) Getting clear to stop the spiral
(28:21) One outing a day
Resources Mentioned:
Meeting signup formFind a Twelve Step group near youSign up for meeting notificationsFollow Us:
Follow Jackie: jackiefreed.la Follow Denise: @denise.freed Follow us on Instagram: @12stepsforeveryone Follow us on TikTok: @12stepsforeveryone
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For Jackie, summer brings sunny melancholy and big birthday feelings. This year is particularly rough as she acclimates to a changing friend group. Denise finds the birthday season ideal for auditing how aligned her intentions are with her reality, acknowledging, however, that she often has unrealistic expectations for herself.
A forever pro to attending meetings for Denise is the reassuring social aspect, and they hope their meetings will provide a similar comfort for people. Jackie reflects that she’s been experiencing a lot of ups and downs, grappling with work-life balance lately. They discuss the role that finding the right balance of medications may have in how Jackie approaches tasks. Denise swears by her daily practice of reflection, amends, and forgiveness for building discipline to tackle life’s responsibilities.
The pair then discuss victimizing, the challenges of finding the right therapist, and how they are collectively working through generational trauma. It's just another day for these superheroes!
If you’re interested in being a future podcast guest or want to attend our meetings (once they’re up and running), send us an email at [email protected] with your thoughts and any other questions you have! We can’t wait to hear from you. We’ll see you soon.
Topics Covered:
(00:07) Shared birthday celebrations
(06:45) Adjusting to changing friend groups
(16:52) How to be an adult
(24:44) When to seek therapy
(36:41) Working through generational trauma
Resources Mentioned:
Find a Twelve Step group near youSign up for meeting notifications "Getting Things Done" bookFollow Us:
Follow Jackie: jackiefreed.la Follow Denise: @denise.freed Follow us on Instagram: @12stepsforeveryone Follow us on TikTok: @12stepsforeveryone
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Denise shares how she maintains her long-standing friendships, many of whom she met through AA. Friendships as a sober person going to meetings are especially important because you become a part of a supportive community and feel welcomed time and time again. Jackie and Denise discuss navigating gossip, secrets, and building trust within friend groups. Remember, words have consequences!
Jackie shares how social media sometimes gives her the illusion of maintaining her friendships and the very modern phenomenon of “pebbling.” Spontaneously calling or texting someone these days has become more nuanced than ever! They also discuss the challenges of forming new adult friendships.
Denise shares that some friendships occasionally need to be let go of, or she is simply not open to them. Most often, people are stuck in victim energy, and it’s OK not to want to support them in that.
The underlying importance of AA meetings and friendships is being around people. We’re human, and we need presence. Presence is everything. When you do find those people, it’s essential to hold on to them and nurture those relationships.
If you’re interested in being a future podcast guest or want to attend our meetings (once they’re up and running), send us an email at [email protected] with your thoughts and any other questions you have! We can’t wait to hear from you. We’ll see you soon.
Topics Covered:
(02:39) AA friendships
(08:33) Childhood friendships
(10:10) Restraint of pen and tongue
(20:39) Social media’s role in maintaining friendships
(26:45) New adult friendships
(32:54) Letting go of friendships
(37:01) Upcoming birthdays
Resources Mentioned:
Find a Twelve Step group near youFollow Us:
Follow Jackie: jackiefreed.la Follow Denise: @denise.freed Follow us on Instagram: @12stepsforeveryone Follow us on TikTok: @12stepsforeveryone
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In this current season of financial stress, Jackie is not feeling OK. A lack of financial freedom coupled with grim healthcare options is feeling heavy. In the midst of a cost-of-living and housing crisis, anything beyond our basic needs, like therapy, can feel superfluous.
For the first time in a while, Jackie joined Denise at a Twelve Step Meeting. She recalls the cultural norms and rituals of the meetings that felt new to her. The pair also attended a different kind of meeting at a women’s wellness center centered around networking. They discuss their different approaches to attending social events and what makes them feel comfortable or otherwise when going to a gathering where they don’t know anyone.
As Denise and Jackie continue strategizing for the meetings they plan to host, they are carefully considering where they want the meetings to be like traditional Twelve Step meetings and where they don’t. Jackie raises the importance of third spaces. As they are on a decline, their own meeting spaces will hopefully become a kind of third space for their community. For Denise, there is great comfort in knowing she could attend a meeting anywhere around the world.
While the meeting design conversation still has a way to go, one thing is for sure: no bigots allowed!
If you’re interested in being a future podcast guest or want to attend our meetings (once they’re up and running), send us an email at [email protected] with your thoughts and any other questions you have! We can’t wait to hear from you. We’ll see you soon.
Topics Covered:
(01:39) Financial stress, lack of affordable housing, and inadequate medical care
(04:01) attends a Twelve Step Meeting
(07:58) Open meetings welcome everyone
(13:31) Socializing preferences, social anxiety, and social habits
(30:56) The need for more third places
(38:12) Feeling vulnerable and uncertain
Resources Mentioned:
Find a Twelve Step group near youSearch for an online AA meetingFind an Al-Anon meeting near youFollow Us:
Follow Jackie: jackiefreed.la Follow Denise: @denise.freed Follow us on Instagram: @12stepsforeveryone Follow us on TikTok: @12stepsforeveryone
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Denise and Jackie are back! And they’ve got the blues. They share the highlights and lowlights from their recent trip to Japan, process in real time what they learned from the experience, and offer their strategies for working through depression.
Traveling has a funny way of bringing things up, and the duo’s time in Japan was no exception. Denise shares that her travel stress starts as soon as she decides to go somewhere and how that stress showed up as she prepared to depart for Japan. In spite of last-minute flight changes, her attitude of wonder and acceptance allowed her to move through the potentially stressful situations with a feeling of graceful flow. Instead, she views the hiccups as tests of actually letting go of a perfect or planned outcome.
The pair reflect on the onsen ordeal and the little blessings present in the midst of the unexpected. Denise and Jackie are still navigating their own versions of a sticky readjustment period back home in Los Angeles. Jackie feels especially ungrounded as she navigates her Saturn return and is even tempted to move to Japan! But as Denise reminds her, wherever you go, there you are, which, in a nutshell, means we can’t escape our problems. Jackie handles feeling depressed through the process she learned in therapy of weighing discomforts, whereas Denise manages her post-vacation depression by planning another vacation.
If you’re interested in being a future podcast guest or want to attend our meetings (once they’re up and running), send us an email at [email protected] with your thoughts and any other questions you have! We can’t wait to hear from you. We’ll see you soon.
Episode Outline:
(01:59) Reentry is rough
(04:25) Managing pre-travel stress
(13:17) Tests of letting go
(23:04) Trials at the onsen
(33:44) Anxiety from feeling obligated
(38:41) Adjusting to returning home
Follow Us:
Subscribe on YouTube
Follow Jackie
Follow Denise
Follow us on Instagram
Follow us on TikTok
Email us
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So much can happen in a day! One of the 12 Step Program’s popular adages, “one day at a time,” can really feel like too long for Jackie. Instead, she finds that sometimes, focusing solely on primal needs, one after the other, one minute at a time, can work better.
Denise and Jackie then each share what’s worked and not worked for pulling themselves out of the dumps. For Jackie, she’s still deep in a funk however, she shares a certain mantra that has kept her afloat during this rough time. One of her biggest frustrations at the moment is taxes, feeling constant setbacks around getting the task done, and being overwhelmed by how her life plays into the state of the world.
They then discuss how to approach going to meetings when newly sober. There are so many kinds of meetings and resources to choose from, especially following the Zoom revolution. Jackie shares why she carries imposter syndrome at the idea of going to certain meetings and how she continues to relive step one of the new 12 Steps Reimagined that they wrote. Denise lovingly offers great tips to counteract the blues, and the duo says goodbye ahead of their big trip to Japan.
If you’re interested in being a future podcast guest or want to attend our meetings (once they’re up and running), send us an email at [email protected] with your thoughts and any other questions you have! We can’t wait to hear from you. We’ll see you soon.
Topics Covered:
Why “one day at a time” doesn’t always workAddiction isn’t a choiceIs fake it til you make it helpful or harmful? Solutions to not feeling greatThe “choice” of self-medicationResources for when you first get soberRock bottoms and surrenderRole of values in decision-makingJackie’s next action stepResources Referenced:
The Values Deck by Jaimi BrooksAA MeetingFind a Gambler's AnonymousAl-AnonDebtors AnonymousAdult Children of AlcoholicsFollow Us:
Follow Jackie: jackiefreed.la Follow Denise: @denise.freed Follow us on Instagram: @12stepsforeveryone Follow us on TikTok: @12stepsforeveryone
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