Episodes
-
00:51:58 Rebecca Traister and Avi Klein — #MeToo Through a Solutions Lens
On Being with Krista Tippett addThe feminist journalist and the psychotherapist. “It’s partners and lovers and spouses…fathers and brothers and sons and friends.” The difference between apology and forgiveness. “Men are used to trying to fix things.” Trauma, and also healing.
What we are naming with the impetus of #MeToo is, at best, an opening to a long-term cultural reckoning to grow up humanity; to make our society more whole. We explore this with psychotherapist Avi Klein, who works with men and couples, and feminist journalist Rebecca Traister. In a room full of journalists, at the invitation of the Solutions Journalism Network, we explored how to build the spaces, the imaginative muscle, and the pragmatic forms to support healing for women and men, now and in time.
Rebecca Traister is a writer for “New York Magazine” and a contributing editor at “Elle.” She is the author of “Big Girls Don’t Cry,” “All the Single Ladies,” and “Good and Mad: The Revolutionary Power of Women’s Anger.”
Avi Klein is a psychotherapist and licensed clinical social worker. He practices in Manhattan. His 2018 “New York Times” Op-Ed piece is titled “What Men Say About #MeToo in Therapy.”
Find the transcript for this show at onbeing.org.
-
[Unedited] Rebecca Traister and Avi Klein with Krista Tippett
On Being with Krista Tippett addThe feminist journalist and the psychotherapist. “It’s partners and lovers and spouses…fathers and brothers and sons and friends.” The difference between apology and forgiveness. “Men are used to trying to fix things.” Trauma, and also healing.
What we are naming with the impetus of #MeToo is, at best, an opening to a long-term cultural reckoning to grow up humanity; to make our society more whole. We explore this with psychotherapist Avi Klein, who works with men and couples, and feminist journalist Rebecca Traister. In a room full of journalists, at the invitation of the Solutions Journalism Network, we explored how to build the spaces, the imaginative muscle, and the pragmatic forms to support healing for women and men, now and in time.
Rebecca Traister is a writer for “New York Magazine” and a contributing editor at “Elle.” She is the author of “Big Girls Don’t Cry,” “All the Single Ladies,” and “Good and Mad: The Revolutionary Power of Women’s Anger.”
Avi Klein is a psychotherapist and licensed clinical social worker. He practices in Manhattan. His 2018 “New York Times” Op-Ed piece is titled “What Men Say About #MeToo in Therapy.”
This interview is edited and produced with music and other features in the On Being episode "Rebecca Traister and Avi Klein — #MeToo Through a Solutions Lens." Find more at onbeing.org.
-
Missing episodes?
- 00:17:04
Living the Questions: What does civility actually mean, and is it enough?
On Being with Krista Tippett addA question from Kevin: “I have been hearing a lot of deconstruction of the word ‘civility.’ The debate around this word has become, like so many other things, binary. ‘Civility’ is either a tool of oppressors to silence those on the margins, or it is something that is necessary for every single conversation and dialogue. I’d love to hear something about this word — what it actually means, in what contexts can it be helpful, in what contexts can it be used as a tool to silence anger.”
Takeaways from the podcast:
— What is the inner work of civility that goes deeper than the surface of our encounters with each other?
— What is the goal of civility?
— “My concern for a while has been that the word is too meek; that it’s about being nice and tame and safe, and I don’t think stepping into any of the dark places and the fraught places right now can be nice or tame or safe. I always reach for other words to attach, like ‘muscular’—it has to be muscular, it has to be robust—this language we use in the Grounding Virtues, ‘adventurous civility.’ It needs to be an adventure.”
— “To use civility to silence anger is using a simplistic, binary understanding of civility as a kind of passive-aggressive weapon. And that’s not what I mean when I use the word.”
— “Civility is internal work that each of us needs to do.”
— “A question we fail to ask, so much, in American life is not just, what do I want to happen here; what do I have to say; what do I care about; what is at stake? But, what is the most effective way that my words can be heard? What is the most emotionally intelligent way, which is also going to be a productive way, that I can embody and represent and give voice to what I care deeply about?”
— “Creating spaces and experiences of robust, adventurous civility is actually very strategically effective because what you’re doing is you’re creating a space in which it is reasonable to ask people, smart people, complicated people who’ve been through complicated things, to let themselves get uncomfortable in the presence of a stranger.”
— “I am passionate about what I am passionate about. I’m scared about what I’m scared about, or I’m angry about what I’m angry about. And I know there are things I don’t understand, and I don’t want to stay this way forever, and I don’t want us to stay stuck here forever. So, I want to change and grow, and I invite you to be with me in that spirit too, and let’s see what happens.”
About the Living the Questions series, from Krista Tippett:
"I think of a good conversation as an adventure. You create a generous and trustworthy space for it, and prepare hospitably for it, so the other person will feel so welcome and understood that they will put words around something they have never put words around quite that way before. They will give voice to something they didn’t know they knew — and you will be a witness to thinking, revelation, in real time. This is one reason that radio/podcasting is such a magical medium: Everyone who listens joins that room, becomes a witness, the moment they push ‘play.’ They are also there for the revelation. It’s a form of time travel. And if the conversation is edifying (one of my favorite, underused words), we all sync up in some mysterious way across time and space and grow a little together.
In recent years, I’ve discovered that I really like being on the other side of a conversation too. Maybe because I’ve experienced that thrill of revelation so many times, I approach someone asking questions of me with great anticipation of what they will draw out of me that I can’t draw out of myself. So, last summer on social media, my colleagues and I asked for questions you’d want to throw at me. We received, and continue to receive, such a bounty."
Find more at onbeing.org/collection/living-the-questions.
- 00:51:56
Pico Iyer — The Urgency of Slowing Down
On Being with Krista Tippett addAbsorption as a definition of happiness. "To bring that calm into the motion, the commotion of the world." Traveling not in order to move around but in order to be moved. His friend Leonard Cohen. Stillness & silence as a recharging station for the soul.
Pico Iyer is one of our most eloquent explorers of what he calls the "inner world" — in himself and in the 21st century world at large. The journalist and novelist travels the globe from Ethiopia to North Korea and lives in Japan. But he also experiences a remote Benedictine hermitage as his second home, retreating there many times each year. In this intimate conversation, we explore the discoveries he's making and his practice of "the art of stillness."
Pico Iyer is a journalist and writer. He's written over a dozen books including "The Global Soul: Jet Lag, Shopping Malls, and the Search for Home," "The Open Road: The Global Journey of the Fourteenth Dalai Lama," and "The Art of Stillness: Adventures in Going Nowhere." He has two books on Japan upcoming in 2019: "Autumn Light" and "A Beginner’s Guide to Japan."
Find the transcript for this show at onbeing.org.
-
[Unedited] Pico Iyer with Krista Tippett
On Being with Krista Tippett addAbsorption as a definition of happiness. "To bring that calm into the motion, the commotion of the world." Traveling not in order to move around but in order to be moved. His friend Leonard Cohen. Stillness & silence as a recharging station for the soul.
Pico Iyer is one of our most eloquent explorers of what he calls the "inner world" — in himself and in the 21st century world at large. The journalist and novelist travels the globe from Ethiopia to North Korea and lives in Japan. But he also experiences a remote Benedictine hermitage as his second home, retreating there many times each year. In this intimate conversation, we explore the discoveries he's making and his practice of "the art of stillness."
Pico Iyer is a journalist and writer. He's written over a dozen books including "The Global Soul: Jet Lag, Shopping Malls, and the Search for Home," "The Open Road: The Global Journey of the Fourteenth Dalai Lama," and "The Art of Stillness: Adventures in Going Nowhere." He has two books on Japan upcoming in 2019: "Autumn Light" and "A Beginner’s Guide to Japan."
This interview is edited and produced with music and other features in the On Being episode "Pico Iyer — The Urgency of Slowing Down." Find more at onbeing.org.
- 00:51:58
Rachel Naomi Remen — The Difference Between Fixing and Healing
On Being with Krista Tippett addThe wise physician and lyrical author. How our losses actually help us to live. Perfection as the booby prize in life. "Wholeness is never lost, it is only forgotten." "Stories are the flesh we put on the bones of the facts of our lives." Listening generously.
Rachel Naomi Remen’s lifelong struggle with Crohn’s disease has shaped her practice of medicine, and she in turn is helping to reshape the art of healing. "The way we deal with loss shapes our capacity to be present to life more than anything else," she says. And each of us, with our wounds and our flaws, has exactly what’s needed to help repair the part of the world that we can see and touch.
Dr. Rachel Naomi Remen is founder of the Remen Institute for the Study of Health and Illness (RISHI), clinical professor of family medicine at UCSF School of Medicine, and professor of family medicine at the Boonshoft School of Medicine at Wright State University. Her beloved books "Kitchen Table Wisdom" and "My Grandfather's Blessings" have been translated into 24 languages.
Find the transcript for this show at onbeing.org.
-
[Unedited] Rachel Naomi Remen with Krista Tippett
On Being with Krista Tippett addThe wise physician and lyrical author. How our losses actually help us to live. Perfection as the booby prize in life. "Wholeness is never lost, it is only forgotten." "Stories are the flesh we put on the bones of the facts of our lives." Listening Generously.
Rachel Naomi Remen’s lifelong struggle with Crohn’s disease has shaped her practice of medicine, and she in turn is helping to reshape the art of healing. "The way we deal with loss shapes our capacity to be present to life more than anything else," she says. And each of us, with our wounds and our flaws, has exactly what’s needed to help repair the part of the world that we can see and touch.
Dr. Rachel Naomi Remen is founder of the Remen Institute for the Study of Health and Illness (RISHI), clinical professor of family medicine at UCSF School of Medicine, and professor of family medicine at the Boonshoft School of Medicine at Wright State University. Her beloved books "Kitchen Table Wisdom" and "My Grandfather's Blessings" have been translated into 24 languages.
This interview is edited and produced with music and other features in the On Being episode "Rachel Naomi Remen — The Difference Between Fixing and Healing." Find more at onbeing.org.
- 00:51:33
Anand Giridharadas — When the Market Is Our Only Language
On Being with Krista Tippett addWe Americans revere the creation of wealth. Anand Giridharadas wants us to examine this and how it shapes our life together. This is a challenging conversation but a generative one: about the implicit moral equations behind a notion like "win-win"— and the moral compromises in a cultural consensus we’ve reached, without reflecting on it, about what and who can save us.
Anand Giridharadas is a journalist and writer. He is a former columnist and foreign correspondent for "The New York Times" and a visiting scholar at the Arthur L. Carter Journalism Institute at New York University. He is the author of "India Calling," "The True American," and "Winners Take All: The Elite Charade of Changing the World."
Find the transcript for this show at onbeing.org.
-
[Unedited] Anand Giridharadas with Krista Tippett
On Being with Krista Tippett addWe Americans revere the creation of wealth. Anand Giridharadas wants us to examine this and how it shapes our life together. This is a challenging conversation but a generative one: about the implicit moral equations behind a notion like "win-win" — and the moral compromises in a cultural consensus we’ve reached, without reflecting on it, about what and who can save us.
Anand Giridharadas is a journalist and writer. He is a former columnist and foreign correspondent for "The New York Times" and a visiting scholar at the Arthur L. Carter Journalism Institute at New York University. He is the author of "India Calling," "The True American," and "Winners Take All: The Elite Charade of Changing the World."
This interview is edited and produced with music and other features in the On Being episode "Anand Giridharadas — When the Market Is Our Only Language." Find more at onbeing.org.
- 00:52:15
James Doty — The Magic Shop of the Brain
On Being with Krista Tippett addA brain surgeon. “The brain is one of the most beautiful things I have ever seen.” The science of compassion. The baggage of evolution. The two way street of “neural innovation that comes from the brain stem into the heart.”
Brain surgeon James Doty is on the cutting edge of our knowledge of the brain and the heart: how they talk to each other; what compassion means in the body and in action; and how we can reshape our lives and perhaps our species through the scientific and human understanding we are now gaining.
James Doty is a clinical professor of neurosurgery at Stanford University and founding director of CCARE, the Center for Compassion and Altruism Research and Education. His book is "Into the Magic Shop: A Neurosurgeon’s Quest to Discover the Mysteries of the Brain and the Secrets of the Heart." He is also the senior editor of the "Oxford Handbook of Compassion Science."
Find the transcript for this show at onbeing.org.
-
[Unedited] James Doty with Krista Tippett
On Being with Krista Tippett addA brain surgeon. “The brain is one of the most beautiful things I have ever seen.” The science of compassion. The baggage of evolution. The two way street of “neural innovation that comes from the brain stem into the heart.”
Brain surgeon James Doty is on the cutting edge of our knowledge of the brain and the heart: how they talk to each other; what compassion means in the body and in action; and how we can reshape our lives and perhaps our species through the scientific and human understanding we are now gaining.
James Doty is a clinical professor of neurosurgery at Stanford University and founding director of CCARE, the Center for Compassion and Altruism Research and Education. His book is "Into the Magic Shop: A Neurosurgeon’s Quest to Discover the Mysteries of the Brain and the Secrets of the Heart." He is also the senior editor of the "Oxford Handbook of Compassion Science."
This interview is edited and produced with music and other features in the On Being episode "James Doty — The Magic Shop of the Brain." Find more at onbeing.org.
- 00:52:16
Tracy K. Smith — love is a language / Few practice, but all, or near all speak
On Being with Krista Tippett addThe U.S. Poet Laureate. “There’s this whole other narrative unfolding.” How history “which once felt so remote, feels closer and active and unresolved.” Listening for the spaces that are under-imagined. “Little leaps of imagination” that can restore us.
Tracy K. Smith has a deep interest in “the kind of silence that yields clarity” and “the way our voices sound when we dip below the decibel level of politics.” She’s a welcome voice on the little leaps of the imagination that can restore us. She’s spent the past year traversing our country, listening for all of this and drawing it forth as the U.S. Poet Laureate. Krista spoke with her at the invitation of New York’s B’nai Jeshurun synagogue, which has been in communal exploration on creating a just and redeemed social fabric.
Tracy K. Smith is the 22nd United States Poet Laureate and the director of Princeton University’s creative writing program. Her works of poetry include include "Wade in the Water," "Life on Mars," and "Duende." Her memoir is "Ordinary Light." She’s written the introduction to a new book, "American Journal: Fifty Poems for Our Time," and she’s launching a new podcast called The Slowdown.
Find the transcript for this show at onbeing.org.
-
[Unedited] Tracy K. Smith with Krista Tippett
On Being with Krista Tippett addThe U.S. Poet Laureate. “There’s this whole other narrative unfolding.” How history “which once felt so remote, feels closer and active and unresolved.” Listening for the spaces that are under-imagined. “Little leaps of imagination” that can restore us.
Tracy K. Smith has a deep interest in “the kind of silence that yields clarity” and “the way our voices sound when we dip below the decibel level of politics.” She’s a welcome voice on the little leaps of the imagination that can restore us. She’s spent the past year traversing our country, listening for all of this and drawing it forth as the U.S. poet laureate. Krista spoke with her at the invitation of New York’s B’nai Jeshurun synagogue, which has been in communal exploration on creating a just and redeemed social fabric.
Tracy K. Smith is the 22nd United States Poet Laureate and the director of Princeton University’s creative writing program. Her works of poetry include include "Wade in the Water," "Life on Mars," and "Duende." Her memoir is "Ordinary Light." She’s written the introduction to a new book, "American Journal: Fifty Poems for Our Time," and she’s launching a new podcast called The Slowdown.
This interview is edited and produced with music and other features in the On Being episode "Tracy K. Smith — love is a language / Few practice, but all, or near all speak." Find more at onbeing.org.
- 00:52:15
Mirabai Bush — Contemplation, Life, and Work
On Being with Krista Tippett addCo-creator of the Center for Contemplative Mind in Society. “There is a calming, quieting, centering practice that leads to insight in every tradition.” Contemplative practice and social change. Mindful emailing. Creative, relational, ritual, cyclical.
Mirabai Bush works at an emerging 21st century intersection of industry, social healing, and diverse contemplative practices. Raised Catholic with Joan of Arc as her hero, she is one of the people who brought Buddhism to the West from India in the 1970s. She is called in to work with educators and judges, social activists and soldiers. She helped create Google’s popular employee program, Search Inside Yourself. Mirabai Bush’s life tells a fascinating narrative of our time: the rediscovery of contemplative practices, in many forms and from many traditions, in the secular thick of modern culture.
Mirabai Bush co-founded the Center for Contemplative Mind in Society. She is the author of Contemplative Practices in Higher Education and has written two books with Ram Dass: Compassion in Action and Walking Each Other Home: Conversations on Loving and Dying.
Find the transcript for this show at onbeing.org.
-
[Unedited] Mirabai Bush with Krista Tippett
On Being with Krista Tippett addCo-creator of the Center for Contemplative Mind in Society. “There is a calming, quieting, centering practice that leads to insight in every tradition.” Contemplative practice and social change. Mindful emailing. Creative, relational, ritual, cyclical.
Mirabai Bush works at an emerging 21st century intersection of industry, social healing, and diverse contemplative practices. Raised Catholic with Joan of Arc as her hero, she is one of the people who brought Buddhism to the West from India in the 1970s. She is called in to work with educators and judges, social activists and soldiers. She helped create Google’s popular employee program, Search Inside Yourself. Mirabai Bush’s life tells a fascinating narrative of our time: the rediscovery of contemplative practices, in many forms and from many traditions, in the secular thick of modern culture.
Mirabai Bush co-founded the Center for Contemplative Mind in Society. She is the author of Contemplative Practices in Higher Education and has written two books with Ram Dass: Compassion in Action and Walking Each Other Home: Conversations on Loving and Dying.
This interview is edited and produced with music and other features in the On Being episode "Mirabai Bush — Contemplation, Life, and Work." Find more at onbeing.org.
- 00:52:04
Arlie Hochschild — The Deep Stories of Our Time
On Being with Krista Tippett addA creator of the field of the sociology of emotion. Treating emotion seriously in our life together. “I could see what they couldn’t see but not what I couldn’t see.” Our stories as “felt” not merely factual. Caring is not the same as capitulating.
One of the voices many have been turning to in recent years is Arlie Hochschild. She helped create the field of the sociology of emotion — our stories as “felt” rather than merely factual. When she published her book, "Strangers in Their Own Land: Anger and Mourning on the American Right," in the fall of 2016, it felt like she had chronicled the human dynamics that have now come to upend American culture. It was based on five years of friendship and research in Tea Party country at that movement’s height, far from her home in Berkeley, California. Her understanding of emotion in society and politics feels even more important at this juncture. So does the reflective, self-critical sensibility this experience gave Arlie Hochschild on her own liberal instincts. Caring, she says, is not the same as capitulating.
Arlie Hochschild is professor emerita in the Sociology Department at the University of California, Berkeley. She is the author of nine books including "The Managed Heart," "The Second Shift," and "Strangers in Their Own Land: Anger and Mourning on the American Right," a finalist for the National Book Award.
Find the transcript for this show at onbeing.org.
-
[Unedited] Arlie Hochschild with Krista Tippett
On Being with Krista Tippett addA creator of the field of the sociology of emotion. Treating emotion seriously in our life together. “I could see what they couldn’t see but not what I couldn’t see.” Our stories as “felt” not merely factual. Caring is not the same as capitulating.
One of the voices many have been turning to in recent years is Arlie Hochschild. She helped create the field of the sociology of emotion — our stories as “felt” rather than merely factual. When she published her book, "Strangers in Their Own Land: Anger and Mourning on the American Right," in the fall of 2016, it felt like she had chronicled the human dynamics that have now come to upend American culture. It was based on five years of friendship and research in Tea Party country at that movement’s height, far from her home in Berkeley, California. Her understanding of emotion in society and politics feels even more important at this juncture. So does the reflective, self-critical sensibility this experience gave Arlie Hochschild on her own liberal instincts. Caring, she says, is not the same as capitulating.
Arlie Hochschild is professor emerita in the Sociology Department at the University of California, Berkeley. She is the author of nine books including "The Managed Heart," "The Second Shift," and "Strangers in Their Own Land: Anger and Mourning on the American Right," a finalist for the National Book Award.
This interview is edited and produced with music and other features in the On Being episode "Arlie Hochschild — Arlie Hochschild — On the Deep Story of Our Time." Find more at onbeing.org.
- 00:12:01
David Whyte — Poetry from the On Being Gathering (Closing Words)
On Being with Krista Tippett add“The sense of having walked from far inside yourself / out into the revelation, to have risked yourself / for something that seemed to stand both inside you / and far beyond you, that called you back”
David Whyte sent us out into the world at the end of the first On Being Gathering — a four-day coming-together of the On Being community for reflection, conversation, and companionship — at the 1440 Multiversity in the redwoods of Scotts Valley, California.
David Whyte is a poet and an associate fellow at Saïd Business School at the University of Oxford. He is the author of “The Heart Aroused: Poetry and the Preservation of the Soul in Corporate America” and “Consolations: The Solace, Nourishment and Underlying Meaning of Everyday Words.” His most recent book is “The Bell and The Blackbird.”
Find the transcript for this show at onbeing.org.
- 00:52:03
Sally Kohn and Erick Erickson — Relationship Across Rupture
On Being with Krista Tippett addWhat happens when you call your Internet trolls. The peril of forgetting our next door neighbors. “You don’t have to love people to not hate them.”
“People believe things that are mutually contradictory; I think we all do. I know I do.” — Erick Erickson
Earlier this year, the University of Montana invited On Being to attempt an outside the box civil conversation between two political pundits on contrasting ends of the U.S. political spectrum. It became a sold-out, public event in the spirit of Montana’s Senator Mike Mansfield, who famously modeled integrity, courage, and humility across the partisan aisle in the tumult of 1960s and 70s. Sally Kohn and Erick Erickson are both controversial, lightning-rod figures, yet neither of them fits neatly into a partisan mold. The reaction of the youngest people in the room is what compelled us to put this on the air. They said they had not witnessed or imagined a political conversation like this possible: one marked at once by bedrock difference — and good will, humor, and a willingness to bring our questions as well as our arguments, our humanity as well as our positions, into the room, if only for an evening.
Sally Kohn is a progressive columnist and political commentator for CNN. She’s also contributed to Fox News. She hosts the podcast, "State of Resistance." She’s the author of "The Opposite of Hate: A Field Guide to Repairing Our Humanity."
Erick Erickson is editor of the conservative blog, "The Resurgent," host of "The Erick Erickson Show" on WSB Radio in Atlanta, and contributor to Fox News. He’s also contributed to CNN. He’s the author of "Before You Wake: Life Lessons from a Father to His Children."
Find the transcript for this show at onbeing.org.
-
[Unedited] Sally Kohn and Erick Erickson with Krista Tippett
On Being with Krista Tippett add“People believe things that are mutually contradictory; I think we all do. I know I do.” — Erick Erickson
Earlier this year, the University of Montana invited On Being to attempt an outside the box civil conversation between two political pundits on contrasting ends of the U.S. political spectrum. It became a sold-out, public event in the spirit of Montana’s Senator Mike Mansfield, who famously modeled integrity, courage, and humility across the partisan aisle in the tumult of 1960s and 70s. Sally Kohn and Erick Erickson are both controversial, lightning-rod figures, yet neither of them fits neatly into a partisan mold. The reaction of the youngest people in the room is what compelled us to put this on the air. They said they had not witnessed or imagined a political conversation like this possible: one marked at once by bedrock difference — and good will, humor, and a willingness to bring our questions as well as our arguments, our humanity as well as our positions, into the room, if only for an evening. This interview is edited and produced with music and other features in the On Being episode "Sally Kohn and Erick Erickson — Relationship Across Rupture." Find more at onbeing.org.
- Show more