Episoder
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In this best-of episode, we discuss the idea of a "soulmate" as a myth that has been around for thousands of years. It may seem like a concept only for non-married people looking for “the one.” But here’s the thing. If you are married and subscribe to this idea of soulmates, it can be harmful to your marriage. Listen in as we share why!
TAKE THE “US TIME” CHALLENGE
Make a list of other marriage myths and reflect on whether they are impacting your marriage. If so, how can you replace them with truth?
LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK
Did you enjoy this episode? Leave us a review on Apple Podcasts! (https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/team-us/id1565819107)
TEAM US RESOURCES
Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/) FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
“Why people still believe in the soulmate myth” by Katie Bishop at BBC (https://www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20220204-why-people-still-believe-in-the-soulmate-myth) “For as Long as Our Love Shall Last: How the Soulmate Myth Makes Marriage Less Stable and Less Happy” by Brad Wilcox (https://ifstudies.org/blog/for-as-long-as-our-love-shall-last-how-the-soulmate-myth-makes-marriage-less-stable-and-less-happy)Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
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Most marriages don’t fall apart in one big moment. They drift slowly and quietly, often without either person noticing. You can share a house, a life, and a schedule and still end up on relational autopilot.
In this episode, we talk about why connection fades over time and share three simple rhythms that help couples stay emotionally close—not through big gestures, but through small, intentional patterns that gently change the direction of a marriage.
WHAT YOU’LL LEARN IN THIS EPISODE
Why most marriages drift into autopilot without either person realizing it Three simple rhythms that keep a marriage emotionally connected long-term How small, intentional patterns quietly change the direction of your relationshipKEY TAKEAWAYS
Marriages change by direction, not by moments. Small patterns shape where you end up. Connection must be built on purpose and maintained through every season. Repair and emotional openness matter more than perfect communication.US TIME CHALLENGE
This week, talk honestly about whether you’re drifting into autopilot in any area of your marriage, then choose one small shared connection ritual to add. It doesn’t have to be big or impressive. Something simple and intentional is enough. The point isn’t the activity. The point is choosing each other on purpose.
STAY CONNECTED BEYOND THE PODCAST
If you enjoyed this episode, don’t forget to subscribe to Ashleigh’s weekly email newsletter at AshleighSlater.com.
Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
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Manglende episoder?
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In this episode, we’re talking about adaptability and flexibility in marriage. We discuss those everyday moments when staying open and teachable really matter. It’s not just our big decisions, but our small, ordinary interactions that shape how we live life together. Listen in as we explore what psychological flexibility looks like in marriage and how growing in this area can create more peace, safety, and connection over time.
WHAT YOU’LL LEARN IN THIS EPISODE
What psychological flexibility is and why it matters in marriage Why everyday moments—not just big decisions—often create the most tension Common roadblocks to flexibility, including control, rigidity, and shutdown How inflexibility affects emotional safety and connection over time Practical ways to practice flexibility without losing yourself How awareness creates space for better choices in marriageKEY TAKEAWAYS
Psychological flexibility isn’t about being passive or agreeable—it’s about staying open and grounded. Inflexibility often shows up as shutdown, control, or resistance rather than overt conflict. Small, everyday interactions shape the emotional climate of a marriage. Control can feel like safety, but it often comes from fear. Awareness doesn’t fix everything, but it does create space for healthier responses.US TIME CHALLENGE
This week, each of you choose one small area where you’ll intentionally practice flexibility. It might be listening without defending, staying open to a different preference, or pausing instead of shutting down.
At the end of the week, talk about what you noticed—not what you accomplished. The goal isn’t to “do it right,” but to build awareness and connection.
STAY CONNECTED BEYOND THE PODCAST
If you enjoyed this episode, don’t forget to subscribe so you never miss what’s next. And we’d love to hear from you! What’s one way you want to be more open and teachable in your marriage. Share it with us on social media or send us a message at AshleighSlater.com.
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
“What Is Psychological Flexibility?” from the University of Rochester Medical Center (https://www.urmc.rochester.edu/behavioral-health-partners/bhp-blog/april-2020/what-is-psychological-flexibility.aspx) “Psychological Flexibility in Marriage” from Focus on the Family (https://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage/psychological-flexibility-in-marriage/) “How Psychological Flexibility Strengthens Relationships” from Marriage.com (https://www.marriage.com/advice/relationship/psychological-flexibility-in-relationships/)Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
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How do you and your spouse tackle everyday conflicts? In today's best-of episode from our archives, we share three of our favorite tools for working through those smaller disagreements or disputes.
TAKE THE "US TIME" CHALLENGE
Pick one of the tools we shared to try this week when you face conflict with your spouse.
LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK
Did you enjoy this episode? Leave us a review on Apple Podcasts! (https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/team-us/id1565819107)
TEAM US RESOURCES
Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/) FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
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In this best-of episode from our archives, we’re talking about how you can team up not just for the new year, but for every minute, hour, day, week, and month of the year! Listen in as we share three practical ways you can walk in unity. We also talk about spiritual warfare in marriage, what that might look like, and share thoughts on how to navigate it hand-in-hand.
Take the "Us Time" Challenge
Pick one of today’s ways to team up and try it this week.
Team Us Resources
Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/) FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)Links Mentioned in This Episode
“Is This a Spiritual Attack, or Is My Spouse Just a Jerk?” (https://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage/is-this-a-spiritual-attack-or-is-my-spouse-just-a-jerk/)Connect with Ted and Ashleigh
Website (https://ashleighslater.com/) Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/ashleighslater_author/) Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ashleighslaterauthor)Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
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We don't have to be Scrooges to benefit from reflecting on Christmas past, present, and future. In this episode from our archives, we talk about how looking back, living now, and planning ahead together can enrich our marriages.
TAKE THE "US TIME" CHALLENGE
If you’ve been married five years or more, practice nostalgia with your spouse. Ask each other about your favorite Christmas you’ve spent together and why it stands out to you. If you have been married less than five years, plan ahead on where you want to be relationally next Christmas.
LET US KNOW WHAT YOU THINK
Did you enjoy this episode? Leave us a review on Apple Podcasts! (https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/team-us/id1565819107)
TEAM US RESOURCES
Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/) FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
“Here’s why there used to be so many Christmas Day weddings” by Daisy Goddard at Find My Past (https://www.findmypast.co.uk/blog/discoveries/christmas-day-weddings) “How Christmas Memories Can Enrich Your Life” by Mark D. Roberts at Fuller De Pree Center (https://depree.org/de-pree-journal/how-christmas-memories-can-enrich-your-life/) “’Tis the Season for Nostalgia: Holiday Reminiscing Can Have Psychological Benefits” at APA.org (https://www.apa.org/news/press/releases/2011/12/nostalgia) “Look Ahead to Strengthen Your Relationship” by Barton Goldsmith Ph.D. at Psychology Today (https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/emotional-fitness/201310/look-ahead-strengthen-your-relationship) “What Is Active Listening?” by Amy Gallo at Harvard Business Review (https://hbr.org/2024/01/what-is-active-listening)Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
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In this episode, we explore the surprisingly powerful world of micro-habits—those tiny actions that take less than five minutes but, when repeated, create meaningful and lasting change in your marriage. From simple daily rituals to small moments of gratitude to chore-based love notes, you’ll discover how small things practiced often can strengthen connection, build warmth, and shape the overall direction of your relationship.
WHAT YOU’LL LEARN IN THIS EPISODE
What micro-habits are and why researchers say they matter How 1% improvements compound into significant transformation over time Why micro-moments help keep couples from slipping into “roommate mode” Three daily micro-habits that build connection, gratitude, and emotional safety Practical examples of how we use these habits in our own marriageKEY TAKEAWAYS
Small habits practiced consistently create meaningful change over time. Micro-moments protect connection and help couples avoid “roommate mode.” Specific gratitude (“Thank you for…”) shifts focus toward what’s working. Everyday chores can become tangible expressions of love. Simple rituals—like hello, goodbye, and goodnight kisses—strengthen emotional and physical connection.US TIME CHALLENGE
Choose one micro-habit and practice it every day this week. It can be one of the three we shared or be a micro-moment unique to your relationship. Consistency is the goal, not size. Let the small thing do its quiet, steady work.
STAY CONNECTED BEYOND THE PODCAST
Follow Ashleigh: Instagram @teamuspodcast | Facebook @ashleighslaterauthor Subscribe to Team Us on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you listen so you don’t miss an episode. Join our community: Get updates, resources, and encouragement for your marriage by signing up for Ashleigh’s weekly email newsletter at AshleighSlater.com.LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
Atomic Habits: An Easy & Proven Way to Build Good Habits & Break Bad Ones by James Clear (https://a.co/d/9kNsP4L) “5 Micro-Moments That Predict the Health of Your Marriage” by Shlomo and Rivka Slatkin at the Marriage Restoration Project (https://themarriagerestorationproject.com/5-micro-moments-that-predict-the-health-of-your-marriage/) “The Art of Micro-Routines: How 5-Minute Habits Can Transform Your Day” by Glossy Magazine (https://theglossymagazine.com/the-art-of-micro-routines-how-5-minute-habits-can-transform-your-day/) “12 Micro Moves for Your Marriage” by Ted Lowe (https://allprodad.com/12-micro-moves-for-your-marriage/)Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
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In a previous episode, we talked about the power of saying, “I’m sorry.” Today, we’re taking the next step and diving into forgiveness, specifically, what it looks like to forgive our spouse. Forgiveness isn’t always easy, but it’s one of the most powerful ways to strengthen a marriage. In this episode, we explore what forgiveness really is (and isn’t), why it’s vital for lasting love, and how practicing it can lead to healing, trust, and deeper connection.
WHAT YOU’LL LEARN IN THIS EPISODE
Why forgiveness plays such a big role in happy, lasting marriages What forgiveness truly means from both a biblical and relational perspective Three things forgiveness is not and why those distinctions matter How to navigate the process of forgiving when it still hurts Practical ways to rebuild trust after forgiveness How to think like a forgiving person and create a culture of grace in your marriageKEY TAKEAWAYS
Forgiveness is a process, not a one-time decision. Forgiveness doesn’t erase responsibility or instantly restore trust. Choosing to forgive frees your heart from bitterness and opens space for connection. Repair—not just resolution—is what rebuilds intimacy after conflict. Thinking like a forgiver starts by asking God to help you see your spouse through His eyes.US TIME CHALLENGE
This week’s challenge is to think about how you think. When your spouse does something that frustrates or hurts you, pause and ask yourself: Am I thinking like a forgiver or like a victim? Invite God to reshape your thoughts, helping you move toward grace and understanding.
STAY CONNECTED BEYOND THE PODCAST
Follow Ashleigh: Instagram @teamuspodcast | Facebook @ashleighslaterauthor Subscribe to Team Us on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you listen so you don’t miss an episode. Join our community: Get updates, resources, and encouragement for your marriage by signing up for Ashleigh’s weekly email newsletter at AshleighSlater.com.LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
“How Forgiveness Can Transform Your Marriage” by the Gottman Institute (https://www.gottman.com/blog/forgiveness-can-transform-marriage/) “Real Answers to Real Relationship Questions” from Chad Moore at Sun Valley Community Church (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=exzwsCITlVM) “What the Bible Really Says About Love” from Chad Moore at Sun Valley Community Church (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mQSMJWhRNFo) “What forgiveness is not: 5 common misconceptions” by Laura Petherbridge (https://www.focusonthefamily.ca/content/what-forgiveness-is-not-5-common-misconceptions) “The Art of Repair: Transforming Conflict Into Closeness” by Greg Smalley (https://www.klove.com/resources/life/the-art-of-repair-transforming-conflict-into-closeness-11585)Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
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The holidays can sometimes feel overwhelming. Between all of the shopping, decorating, and events, it’s easy for us as couples to stay busy without really connecting. In this episode, we share ten fun and affordable holiday date ideas to help you slow down, laugh together, and enjoy the season as a team. You’ll hear creative ways to make time for each other and find joy in everyday moments.
KEY TAKEAWAYS
The holidays don’t have to be stressful or expensive to be meaningful. Simple, shared experiences can bring you closer together. Making time for each other is one of the best gifts you can give this season.US TIME CHALLENGE
Come up with a holiday date idea of your own—something simple that fits you as a couple—and make it happen. Then share it with us at AshleighSlater.com or on social media! We’d love to hear how you’re making time for each other this Christmas.
STAY CONNECTED BEYOND THE PODCAST
Follow Ashleigh: Instagram @teamuspodcast | Facebook @ashleighslaterauthor Subscribe to Team Us on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you listen so you don’t miss an episode. Join our community: Get updates, resources, and encouragement for your marriage by signing up for Ashleigh’s weekly email newsletter at AshleighSlater.com.TEAM US RESOURCES
Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/) FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
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In this fun episode, we share creative and meaningful conversation starters to help you reconnect with your spouse, especially if you feel like you’ve run out of things to say. Whether you’re on a date night, taking a walk, or driving somewhere together, these questions will help you laugh, learn, and rediscover each other.
WHAT YOU’LL LEARN IN THIS EPISODE:
Why it’s normal for couples to occasionally run out of things to say How conversation starters can spark fun, meaningful connection A mix of lighthearted and relationship-focused questions to ask your spouse How laughter and curiosity keep your marriage conversations freshKEY TAKEAWAYS
Playful conversation matters. Asking silly, imaginative questions helps you reconnect through fun and laughter. Curiosity strengthens connection. When you keep learning about each other, you keep growing together. Intentionality counts. Don’t wait for deep conversation to “just happen.” Plan for it by bringing a few questions along on your next date.CONVERSATION STARTERS WE ANSWER
If you could have any job, whether serious or silly, and money was not a factor, what would it be? If time travel existed, when and where would you like to visit first? Who are three famous people, dead or alive, you would want to have lunch with? If you could only listen to two albums for the rest of your life, which ones would you choose, and why? What do you think our biggest strength as a couple is? What about our biggest weakness? What’s a "little thing" in our relationship that you really love? If our life was a reality TV series, what do you think would be the most appropriate title? What is one date we have not done you would like to do?US TIME CHALLENGE
Print out a list of conversation starters and take them with you on your next date night, walk, or long drive. Make it fun by taking turns picking questions, and let the conversation go wherever it leads. You might just discover something new about each other!
STAY CONNECTED BEYOND THE PODCAST
Stay connected with us beyond the show! Visit AshleighSlater.com for free marriage tools, updates on new podcast episodes, and to sign up for her weekly email newsletter.
TEAM US RESOURCES
Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/) FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
“93 Meaningful Conversation Starters & Questions for Couples to Better Connect,” The Adventure Challenge, https://www.theadventurechallenge.com/blogs/news/conversation-starters-for-couples/ “260 Free Printable Conversation Starters for Couples,” WinShape Marriage, https://marriage.winshape.org/resource/conversation-starters-for-date-night/ Bedtime Prayers: Lullabies and Peaceful Worship by Twila Paris (https://amzn.to/4gf4aj5)Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
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In this conversation, we talk about how to face the holidays as a united team rather than letting stress, schedules, or family expectations pull you apart. From setting shared expectations to finding ways to serve and dream together, these five simple principles can help you approach the season hand-in-hand, not back-to-back.
WHAT YOU’LL LEARN IN THIS EPISODE:
How to set holiday expectations as a couple so you stay on the same page Ways to make time for each other amid the busyness of family gatherings and events How serving together can deepen your bond and create meaningful shared memories The value of dreaming together before the new year begins How to handle conflict with a "we vs. the problem" attitudeKEY TAKEAWAYS
Set expectations together. Talk about what kind of holiday season you both want — simple or busy, quiet or full of tradition — before the stress hits. Spend dedicated time together. Guard your connection by scheduling couple time in advance, even if it means celebrating a little differently. Serve others together. Volunteering or giving as a team strengthens your unity and creates shared purpose. Dream together. Use the season to look ahead, set goals, and imagine what’s next for your marriage and family. Face conflict together. When disagreements arise, remember you’re on the same team and approach conflict as us against the problem, not me vs. you.US TIME CHALLENGE
Sit down together and set your holiday expectations as a couple. Talk about what you both want this season to look like — from traditions and travel to budgets and downtime — and then make a plan to help make that vision happen.
STAY CONNECTED BEYOND THE PODCAST
Stay connected with us beyond the show! Visit AshleighSlater.com for free marriage tools, updates on new podcast episodes, and to sign up for my weekly email newsletter.
TEAM US RESOURCES
Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/) FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
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In this conversation, we talk about what it means to “leave and cleave” in marriage and how getting married calls you to realign your loyalties and priorities. We share three ways we’ve learned to live out this principle, and we hope it encourages you to keep choosing your spouse first.
WHAT YOU’LL LEARN IN THIS EPISODE:
The biblical meaning behind the phrase “leave and cleave” Why “leaving and cleaving” is harder in practice than in theory How redefining “immediate family” strengthens your marriage Three practical ways to prioritize your spouse over extended family Why involving parents or siblings in marital conflict can create unnecessary strainKEY TAKEAWAYS
Give your spouse priority over parents and siblings. Your marriage becomes your new “immediate family.” While it’s still important to love and honor your parents, your primary loyalty now belongs to your spouse. Determine to make decisions together first. Going to your spouse before seeking outside input builds trust, unity, and interdependence. It shows that your spouse’s thoughts and feelings come first. Decide not to involve extended family in marital conflict. Unless you’re dealing with abuse or serious issues, resolve everyday disagreements privately. Inviting family into routine conflict can damage relationships and make reconciliation harder.US TIME CHALLENGE
Write down one specific area where you struggle to “leave and cleave.” Share it with your spouse and discuss whether they see it the same way. Then, together, brainstorm two or three practical ways you can improve in that area this week.
STAY CONNECTED BEYOND THE PODCAST
Stay connected with us beyond the show! Visit AshleighSlater.com for free marriage tools, updates on new podcast episodes, and to sign up for her weekly email newsletter.
TEAM US RESOURCES
Team Us: The Unifying Power of Grace, Commitment, and Cooperation in Marriage (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/) FREE Team Us Study Guide (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us/free-team-us-study-guide/)Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
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Ever said "I'm sorry" just to move on? You're not alone. In this episode, we’re talking about how to apologize in a way that actually heals and not just hushes the hurt. We'll share what experts say about why it's so hard to say sorry, what makes an apology sincere, and how humility can transform even the most awkward moments into deeper connection.
WHAT YOU’LL LEARN IN THIS EPISODE
Why apologizing feels so difficult (and what’s really behind it) How to make "I'm sorry" more than just words The difference between regret and a true apology What humility has to do with healing and reconciliation A practical, faith-based process for rebuilding trust after hurtKEY TAKEAWAYS
Real apologies focus on the other person's pain, not our own discomfort. Humility is the foundation of every meaningful apology. "I'm sorry if…" or "I'm sorry but…" aren't true apologies—they're defenses. Taking responsibility rebuilds connection faster than explaining your intent. A sincere apology requires empathy, ownership, and change.US TIME CHALLENGE
Look back at your most recent apologies. Were they centered on your own feelings or your spouse's experience? This week, practice making your next "I'm sorry" one that reflects humility, empathy, and love.
STAY CONNECTED BEYOND THE PODCAST
If you enjoyed this episode, be sure to subscribe to Ashleigh's weekly e-newsletter at AshleighSlater.com, so you never miss what's next.
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
“Study: The states that apologize the most” by Matt Zajechowski “Why is it so hard to apologize?” TedX Talk by Michael Ballard “Why Sorry Seems to Be the Hardest Word” by F. Diane Barth Sorry, Sorry, Sorry: The Case for Good Apologies by Marjorie Ingall and Susan McCarthyDiscover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
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Ever sit down for date night and realize you’re both scrolling instead of talking? You’re not alone. In this episode, we tackle the challenge of “technoference,” or when screens quietly slip between you and your spouse.
For couples who can’t just unplug completely—because, for some of us, “off the clock” isn’t really a thing—we share three simple, memorable ways to protect your marriage time from digital noise. From quick phone checks that don’t spiral into scrolls, to turning toward each other when it matters most, this episode offers practical steps to keep your connection strong, even in a screen-saturated world.
WHAT YOU’LL LEARN IN THIS EPISODE:
What “technoference” means and how it quietly affects relationships Why “just turn it off” doesn’t always work for busy couples Practical steps to handle screens with purpose instead of guilt Three simple, memorable habits for protecting your marriage timeKEY TAKEAWAYS
Veni, Vidi, Vici — “I came, I saw, I conquered”: Take care of the urgent task quickly, then turn back toward your spouse. Stop, Look, Listen: Pause before reaching for your phone. Notice your moment and your marriage. Ready, Steady, Go: When your spouse bids for attention, get ready to respond, steady yourself to act, and then go by giving them your full focus.US TIME CHALLENGE
This week, try one of these three ideas. Maybe it’s setting down your phone mid-scroll, conquering that quick work text and returning fast, or intentionally turning toward your spouse when they reach out. Small shifts can make a big difference in how connected you feel.
STAY CONNECTED BEYOND THE PODCAST
If you enjoyed this episode, don’t forget to subscribe so you never miss what’s next. And we’d love to hear from you! Which of these takeaways do you need most? Share it with us on social media or send us a message at AshleighSlater.com.
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
The Anxious Generation: How the Great Rewiring of Childhood Is Causing an Epidemic of Mental Illness by Jonathan Haidt (https://a.co/d/a1rrbEA) “Technology Tips and Traps in Your Relationship” by Kailee Hansen and David Schramm (https://extension.usu.edu/relationships/research/technology-tips-and-traps-in-your-relationship) The Big-Baby Pivot from How to Talk So Your Spouse Feels Seen and Heard {Episode 101} (https://ashleighslater.com/team-us-podcast-episode-101/)Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
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Ever feel like you and your spouse are talking but not really connecting? You’re saying words, but they’re not landing. We’ve all been there.
In this episode, we share five simple communication techniques—adapted from How to Talk to Anyone by Leil Lowndes—that can help you feel more seen, heard, and understood in marriage. These aren’t gimmicks or manipulative tricks. They’re practical, grace-filled ways to build trust and connection with the person you love most.
WHAT YOU’LL LEARN IN THIS EPISODE:
Why body language and attention matter more than perfect phrasing How to recognize your spouse’s bids for connection and respond well What it means to become a “word detective” in your marriage Why “thank you for…” is stronger than just “thank you” How to use empathy and echoing to make your spouse feel truly heardKEY TAKEAWAYS
The Big-Baby Pivot: Turn your full attention toward your spouse when they speak—it communicates value and presence. Be a Word Detective: Listen for clues about what interests your spouse, and ask follow-up questions. Never the Naked Thank You: Always follow gratitude with for—“Thank you for doing the dishes,” not just “thanks.” Echoing: Mirror key words to show empathy and understanding. Employ Empathizers: Replace “uh-huh” with thoughtful affirmations like “I see what you mean” or “That makes sense.”US TIME CHALLENGE
Pick one of the five communication techniques and practice it intentionally. Maybe it’s pivoting toward your spouse when they talk, or saying, “Thank you for…” instead of just “thanks.” Small shifts in how we speak and listen can make a big difference in how connected we feel.
STAY CONNECTED BEYOND THE PODCAST
If you enjoyed this episode, don’t forget to subscribe so you never miss what’s next. And we’d love to hear from you! Which of the techniques are you going to try first and why? Share it with us on social media or send us a message at AshleighSlater.com.
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
“45 Birthday Questions for Yourself and Your Loved Ones” by Abby Tanner (https://www.familysearch.org/en/blog/birthday-questions) How to Talk to Anyone: 92 Little Tricks for Big Success in Relationships by Leil Lowndes (https://a.co/d/edP59Hc) The Surprising Secrets of Highly Happy Marriages by Shaunti Feldhahn (https://a.co/d/a9FP4Ej)Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
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It’s our 100th episode! Can you believe it? To celebrate this milestone, we’re sharing ten simple hacks for a stronger, happier marriage.
Over the last four years, we’ve talked about each of these in different episodes, but today we’re pulling them all together in one place. These hacks are doable, encouraging, and designed to bring you closer as a couple.
WHAT YOU’LL LEARN IN THIS EPISODE:
Hack 1: Think “Us,” Not “Me” — shift from “me” to “we” for unity and teamwork. Hack 2: Get on the Same Page — create shared goals and expectations, and keep checking in. Hack 3: Dream Together, Stay Together — build connection by pursuing shared dreams. Hack 4: Make Rituals Your Super Glue — create traditions that bond you through consistency. Hack 5: Show Love with Follow-Through — build trust with small, steady actions. Hack 6: Progress Beats Perfection — focus on growth, not flawless performance. Hack 7: Stay Flexible to Stay Connected — adapt to life’s curveballs as a team. Hack 8: Battle Problems, Not Your Partner — face challenges side by side instead of against each other. Hack 9: Turn Conflict into Closeness — lean into conflict with humility and respect to grow stronger. Hack 10: Keep Love Playful and Fun — laugh together and flirt often to keep the spark alive.US TIME CHALLENGE
Choose one hack from the list and practice it together. Whether it’s starting a small ritual, showing follow-through, or sharing a laugh, see how it strengthens your marriage this week.
STAY CONNECTED BEYOND THE PODCAST
If you enjoyed this episode, don’t forget to subscribe so you never miss what’s next. And we’d love to hear from you! Which hack is your favorite and why? Share it with us on social media or send us a message at AshleighSlater.com.
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
“We Can Build This Dream Together” by Erin Smalley (https://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage/dreaming-together-in-marriage/) “Ideas for How to Add Fun Back into Your Marriage” by Andrew Linder (https://www.allprodad.com/ideas-for-how-to-add-fun-back-into-your-marriage/) “Without flirting, it wouldn’t be a marriage” by Sarah Hunter Murray (https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/myths-desire/201909/without-flirting-it-wouldnt-be-marriage)Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
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What do Reese’s, raisins, and rekindling romance have in common? More than you might think. In this episode, we kick things off with a lighthearted chat about October candy trends, before diving into something sweeter: three practical ways to keep the spark alive in marriage.
Whether you’ve been married two years or twenty, you’ll walk away with encouragement and simple steps to nurture friendship, show love in everyday gestures, and let go of old hurts.
WHAT YOU’LL LEARN IN THIS EPISODE:
Why friendship is the foundation of lasting romance The power of small, daily gestures to communicate love How forgiveness frees couples to move forward togetherUS TIME CHALLENGE
This week, pick one or two small gestures of love to practice each day.
STAY CONNECTED BEYOND THE PODCAST
If you enjoyed this episode, don’t forget to subscribe so you never miss what’s next. And we’d love to hear from you! How do you plan to rekindle romance in your marriage this week? Share it with us on social media or send us a message at AshleighSlater.com.
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
“Tricks, Treats, and Trends: Unwrapping DoorDash’s Sweet Halloween Orders” (https://about.doordash.com/en-us/news/doordash-halloween-order-trends) “What Is the Sound Relationship House?” by The Gottman Institute (https://www.gottman.com/blog/what-is-the-sound-relationship-house/) Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work: A Practical Guide from the Country’s Foremost Relationship Expert by John M. Gottman, Ph.D. and Nan Silver (https://a.co/d/dz0gtbl) “F Is for Friendship” by Zac Brittle (https://www.gottman.com/blog/f-is-for-friendship/) “Happy Marriages Are Based on Deep Friendship” by Erin Smalley (https://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage/happy-marriages-are-based-on-deep-friendship/) “Do the Little Things That Matter Big Time” by Shaunti Feldhahn (https://shaunti.com/2014/06/highly-happy-marriage-secret-1-little-things/) The Relationship Cure: A 5 Step Guide to Strengthening Your Marriage, Family, and Friendships by John M. Gottman, Ph.D. and Joan DeClaire (https://a.co/d/23AvquO) “How to Keep a Relationship Alive” by Tony Robbins (https://www.tonyrobbins.com/blog/keeping-the-spark-alive) “How to Have Lighthearted Marriage” by Ashleigh Slater (https://ashleighslater.com/lighthearted-marriage/)Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
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Every couple has conflict. But what happens when we let it linger? In this episode, we’re unpacking three reasons unresolved conflict can poison our connection, our home, and our marriage. Plus, we’ll explore how understanding conflict management styles can help us handle disagreements in a healthier way. Because how we handle conflict shapes the kind of connection we share.
WHAT YOU’LL LEARN IN THIS EPISODE:
The five conflict management styles Why lingering conflict prolongs issues rather than solving them How unresolved conflict breaks connection and trust between spouses The effect lingering conflict has on the atmosphere of your home Practical encouragement from Scripture to address conflict with wisdomUS TIME CHALLENGE
This week, reflect on your conflict management style. Which one do you tend to use most often in your marriage? Do you need to make changes so that conflict doesn’t linger and harm your relationship?
ADDITIONAL TEAM US EPISODES WITH TIPS FOR CONFLICT RESOLUTION
How to Embrace Conflict in Your Marriage as an Adventure, Not a Threat [Episode 5] How to Work Together to Resolve Disagreements [Episode 16] What to Do When Communication Is Frustrating [Episode 22] Why Being Right in Marriage Can Be Wrong [Episode 33] How to Respond When Your Spouse Loads the Dishwasher Wrong [Episode 40] Why We Go to Bed Mad (And How It’s Helped Our Marriage) [Episode 41] 3 Tools for Tackling Everyday Conflicts [Episode 64] 3 Ways to Transforms Kitchen Disagreements into Deeper Connection [Episode 91]STAY CONNECTED BEYOND THE PODCAST
If you enjoyed this episode, don’t forget to subscribe so you never miss what’s next. And we’d love to hear from you! Which conflict management style fits you best and why? Share it with us on social media or send us a message at AshleighSlater.com.
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
“What’s Your Conflict Management Style” by Walden University (https://www.waldenu.edu/news-and-events/walden-news/2017/0530-whats-your-conflict-management-style) “The Hidden Dangers of Unresolved Conflict in Relationships: How Couple’s Counseling Can Help” by Kathryn Fayle (https://www.resilient-minded.com/blog/rhz76pn5j59sl2hk7fm0wk0rsbka5d) “Conflict in Marriage Does Not Need to Be Destructive” by Jason B. Whitin (https://ifstudies.org/blog/conflict-in-marriage-does-not-need-to-be-destructive) “Unresolved Conflict: 4 Consequences of Ignoring Workplace Tension” by Jeremy Pollack (https://pollackpeacebuilding.com/blog/why-ignoring-conflict-within-the-workplace-is-so-detrimental/) “The Conversation That Saved My Marriage” by John Delony (https://www.facebook.com/reel/995281745911215)Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
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We’ve all been a non-listener at times. Maybe it’s been the advice giver, the eternal optimist, the doomsayer, or the one who makes the conversation all about us. The truth is, we all fall into bad listening habits now and then. But here’s the good news: becoming a better listener is possible, and even small shifts can make a big difference in our marriages.
WHAT YOU’LL LEARN IN THIS EPISODE:
The six types of non-listeners, and why we all slip into them sometimes Three practical ways to improve your listening: removing barriers, pausing before you respond, and showing real interest How better listening can deepen connection and help your spouse feel truly valuedUS TIME CHALLENGE
This week, practice pausing for three seconds—or simply taking a breath—before you respond to your spouse. See how it changes the way you listen and connect.
STAY CONNECTED BEYOND THE PODCAST
If you enjoyed this episode, don’t forget to subscribe so you never miss what’s next. And we’d love to hear from you! What non-listener do you struggle with being? Share it with us on social media or contact us at AshleighSlater.com.
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
“The Five Types of Non-Listeners” by Allison Barron (https://www.boundless.org/blog/the-5-types-of-non-listeners/) There Is No Good Card for This: What to Say and Do When Life Is Scary, Awful, and Unfair to People You Love by Kelsey Crowe, Ph.D. and Emily McDowell (https://a.co/d/cSIRtxG) “Why Silence Makes Us So Uncomfortable” by Michele Leno, Ph.D. (https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/mind-matters/202502/why-are-we-so-uncomfortable-with-silence) “Breathe Before You Speak” by Richard Carlson (https://www.livinglifefully.com/flo/flobebreathebeforeyouspeak.htm) “5 Ways to Show You’re Really Listening” by Prepare/Enrich (https://www.prepare-enrich.com/blog/5-ways-to-show-youre-really-listening/) “6 Tools for Healthy Communication in Marriage” by Mike Bechtle (https://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage/6-tools-for-healthy-communication-in-marriage/)Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
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Fall doesn’t have to be all about the big, once-a-year events like apple picking, Oktoberfest, or corn mazes that you choose to do together. It can also be about the smaller, weekly things that build connection, create memories, and give your marriage deeper meaning.
In this episode of the Team Us podcast, we share why traditions matter in marriage, how some of the best ones start, and three simple steps you can use to create your own weekly fall traditions as a couple.
WHAT YOU’LL LEARN IN THIS EPISODE:
The surprising history behind corn mazes and Oktoberfest Why Dr. John Gottman says traditions (or “rituals of connection”) matter for couples How even haphazard, accidental traditions can become meaningful when nurtured Three simple steps to create weekly fall traditions without feeling overwhelmed Practical ideas, from cozy movie nights to coffee shop dates, that you can start this weekUS TIME CHALLENGE
This week, create one weekly fall tradition with your spouse. Use the three steps from today’s episode to get started and see how it adds connection and meaning to your week.
STAY CONNECTED BEYOND THE PODCAST
If you enjoyed this episode, don’t forget to subscribe so you never miss what’s next. And we’d love to hear from you! What weekly fall tradition will you try first? Share it with us on social media or send us a message at AshleighSlater.com.
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE
“The Origin of 25 Fall Traditions” by Stacy Conradt (https://www.mentalfloss.com/article/86478/origins-25-fall-traditions) The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by John M. Gottman, Ph.D., and Nan Silver (https://a.co/d/fWccp2c) “Traditions in Marriage: Setting a New Course” by Laura Schupp (https://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage/traditions-in-marriage-setting-a-new-course/) All It Takes Is a Goal by John Acuff (https://a.co/d/3pBz0VC)Discover more Christian podcasts at lifeaudio.com and inquire about advertising opportunities at lifeaudio.com/contact-us.
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