Episódios
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Dr. Alfiee, psychologist, host of the Couched in Color podcast and founder of the AAKOMA Project, dives into attachment styles, how depression can impact a partnership, and the ways our traumas and triggers can become unearthed in new relationships. Then this week’s Dear Damona question is: I married too young and stayed too long. Can you please help me get back into the dating game?
Ready to break free of your dating loops? Get Damona’s signature online program, The Dating Accelerator by visiting: DamonaHoffman.com/program
Submit your questions for Dear Damona on any of the socials @DamonaHoffman or by visiting DamonaHoffman.com
Timestamps
Introduction to the Episode (00:00:00)
Attachment Styles Overview (00:00:59)
Expectations in Relationships (00:03:30)
The Desire to Change Partners (00:05:04)
The Fantasy of Relationships (00:06:13)
Effort vs. Work in Relationships (00:08:01)
Unpacking Emotional Baggage (00:08:35)
Understanding Attachment Styles (00:09:55)
Cultural Context of Attachment (00:12:04)
Personal Experiences with Attachment (00:14:23)
Embracing Attachment Nuances (00:15:17)
Understanding Family Dynamics and Attachment Styles (00:16:50)
Personal Reflection on Attachment Styles (00:17:42)
The Impact of Community on Relationships (00:18:26)
Navigating Triggers in Relationships (00:19:55)
Mental Health and Medication Statistics (00:20:37)
Stigma Around Mental Health in Communities (00:22:13)
Dating with Mental Health Challenges (00:23:05)
Recognizing Deal Breakers in Relationships (00:23:43)
Changing Attitudes Towards Therapy (00:25:51)
Generational Differences in Mental Health Views (00:27:06)
Healing from Trauma and Relationships (00:28:08)
The Process of Healing and Trauma Management (00:30:25)
Distinguishing Good and Bad Butterflies (00:32:22)
The Importance of Self-Reflection Before Dating (00:33:14)
Understanding Triggers in Relationships (00:33:50)
Disclosing Trauma in Relationships (00:35:17)
Trust and Safety in Sharing Trauma (00:36:12)
Empowerment in Relationships (00:38:17)
Unpopular Opinions on Relationships (00:39:46)
Finding a New Relationship After Marriage (00:41:23)
Going Where the People Are (00:43:24)
Strategic Socializing for Dating (00:45:38).
Creating Momentum in Dating (00:49:04)
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Whether you’re navigating cuffing season, gearing up to meet someone's family for the holidays, or figuring out how to take your dating game to the next level— Damona dedicates this week’s episode to YOU! She’s answering your toughest Dear Damona questions, like:
I struggle to find matches in my area and while I am willing to travel, many men aren’t. So what now?
My matches keep removing their profiles once we exchange numbers. What’s going on here?
When should daters consider sleeping together?
Are gender roles changing or do men still have to be the initiator?
Find Damona and submit your questions on any of the socials @DamonaHoffman or by visiting her website DamonaHoffman.com/contact
Bad news…we filled our last spot for the year.
Good news!! We opened ONE BONUS for VIP coaching this fall. Last chance to get one on one coaching with Damona and her team. Want to snag our lucky last spot? Register for an intro call at DamonaHoffman.com/introcall asap!
TIMESTAMPS
Intro (00:00:00)
Does This Mean He Likes Me? (00:00:01)
Am I Ever Gonna Meet Someone? (00:00:04)
I'm Tired of Swiping (00:00:06)
Cuffing Season and Relationship Dynamics (00:00:08)
Adrian's Dating App Dilemma (00:01:43)
Changing Location Filters in Dating (00:04:25)
The Importance of Compatibility (00:05:39)
Long-Distance Relationship Insights (00:06:53)
Dating Apps and Long-Distance Features (00:09:24)
Caution Against Exchanging Phone Numbers (00:11:28)
Identifying Catfish and Scammers (00:12:38)
Maintaining Momentum in Communication (00:13:38)
Sue's Experience with Catfish (00:14:41)
Navigating Online Dating Safely (00:15:54)
Introduction to Possible Soulmates (00:17:59)
Guidelines for Intimacy (00:19:01)
Understanding Sexual Health (00:20:22)
Pacing Your Relationship (00:24:23)
Women Initiating Dates (00:25:28)
Mutual Interest in Dating (00:26:46)
Being True to Yourself (00:29:04)
Closing Remarks and Engagement (00:30:19)
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Estão a faltar episódios?
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Esther Lee, Deputy Editor of The Knot, breaks down the stats released in the website’s Relationship & Intimacy Study, and spills the tea on where singles are finding love, what they’re actually looking for, how they’re spending their time on dates, and those dating dealbreakers we just can’t shake. And, this week’s Dear Damona question is: Is a bra an appropriate gift for a young couple?
Ready to break free of your dating loops? Get Damona’s signature online program, The Dating Accelerator at 10% off (for limited time only) using the code PODCAST10: DamonaHoffman.com/program
LAST CALL - Just 1 spot remains for the VIP one-on-one coaching program this year. Serious applicants should book an assessment call ASAP with our head of coaching programs: DamonaHoffman.com/introcall
Submit your questions for Dear Damona on any of the socials @DamonaHoffman or by visiting DamonaHoffman.com
Timestamps
Introduction to the Episode (00:00:00)
Damona's Welcome (00:00:13)
Introducing Esther Lee (00:01:04)
Damona's Personal Wedding Experience (00:02:11)
Evolution of Wedding Planning (00:02:49)
The Knot's 2024 Study Overview (00:03:46)
Key Findings of the Study (00:05:01)
Dating Apps vs. Real-Life Connections (00:05:54)
Generational Perspectives on Dating (00:06:41)
Changing Standards in Attraction (00:07:56)
Being Easy to Talk To (00:09:14)
Fostering Connection and Communication (00:09:47)
Listening as a Key Element (00:11:40)
The Chemistry Myth (00:12:10)
Importance of Sexual Attraction (00:12:59)
Married Couples and Sexual Chemistry (00:14:00)
Comfort and Chemistry in Relationships (00:15:54)
Commitment After Marriage (00:16:51)
Importance of Attraction (00:18:05)
Subjective Sense of Humor (00:19:29)
Humor as Relationship Tool (00:21:01)
Video Game Dates (00:21:48)
Meeting Through Gaming (00:24:00)
Creative and Affordable Dates (00:26:06)
Deal Breakers in Relationships (00:29:59)
Chemistry vs. Values (00:31:00)
Long Distance Relationships (00:32:48)
Communication in Long-Distance Relationships (00:33:14)
Intentionality in Relationships (00:34:05)
Finding Love Beyond Geography (00:35:36)
Unpopular Opinion on First Dates (00:37:17)
Navigating Intimate Gift Missteps (00:39:20)
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Benjamin Camras, The Flirt Coach & host of the Flirtations Flirtcast, joins Damona for our annual Halloween Dating Horror Stories Special. You’ll laugh, you’ll scream, and you’ll get useful advice to survive your next bad date. Stories include:
Blindsided by a Blind Date
The Vegetarian Variation
The Creepy Car Concert
The Deskside Date
The Freudian Movie Man
Ready to break free of your dating loops? Get Damona’s signature online program, The Dating Accelerator at 10% off (for limited time only) using the code PODCAST10: DamonaHoffman.com/program
Only 1 spot remains for the VIP one-on-one coaching program this year. Serious applicants should book an assessment call ASAP with our head of coaching programs: DamonaHoffman.com/introcall
Submit your questions for Dear Damona on any of the socials @DamonaHoffman or by visiting DamonaHoffman.com
TIMESTAMPS
Introduction to Halloween Horror Stories (00:00:00)
Listener Engagement (00:00:07)
Benjamin the Flirt Coach Introduction (00:02:18)
Costume Reveal (00:02:30)
Personal Dating Horror Stories (00:04:10)
Listener Story from Amanda (00:07:07)
Discussion on Movie Dates (00:11:40)
Activity Date Preferences (00:12:40)
Candy Smuggling at the Movies (00:14:31)
Vegetarian Red Flag Story (00:15:47)
Flirty Late Night Snack Decisions (00:16:31)
Libras and Perspective (00:17:09)
Boundaries and Alcohol-Induced Choices (00:19:20)
Dating an Older Guy (00:20:01)
Red Flags in Dating (00:21:11)
Avoiding Generalizations in Dating (00:22:13)
First Date Conversations (00:24:49)
Exploring Physical Intimacy (00:26:11)
Flirtation as Foreplay (00:27:28)
Listener Horror Story Introduction (00:28:44)
Zoom Date Disaster (00:30:24)
Multitasking on Dates (00:31:57)
Check-in Date Tips (00:33:04)
Pre-Date Communication (00:33:50)
Slow Dating Trend (00:34:13)
In-App Calling Features (00:37:13)
Age and Dating Preferences (00:38:28)
Horror Story Introduction (00:39:55)
Uncomfortable Date Behavior (00:41:32)
Lying About Height (00:43:01)
Closing Remarks (00:46:18)
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Erika Wasserman, Your Financial Therapist, is shifting the narrative around money and using those sometimes-tough conversations to build deeper trust and better communication with your partner and tackling the tricky financial situations singles often find themselves in while dating. Our Dear Damona question this week is: I have social anxiety. Do I need to focus on making more friends before pursuing a romantic relationship?
Ready to break free of your dating loops? Get Damona’s signature online program, The Dating Accelerator at 10% off (for limited time only) using the code PODCAST10: DamonaHoffman.com/program
Only 2 spots remain for the VIP one-on-one coaching program this year. Serious applicants should book an assessment call ASAP with our head of coaching programs: DamonaHoffman.com/introcall
Submit your questions on any of the socials @DamonaHoffman or by visiting DamonaHoffman.com
TIMESTAMPS
Introduction to Relationship Stress (00:00:00)
Host's Opening Remarks (00:00:14)
Introduction of Erika Wasserman (00:02:26)
Erika's Journey to Financial Therapy (00:03:19)
Dating and Financial Transparency (00:04:08)
Challenges of Financial Conversations (00:09:15)
Gamifying Financial Discussions (00:10:01)
Reality of Debt in Dating (00:12:04)
Understanding Debt and Relationships (00:14:46)
Understanding Debt and Readiness to Date (00:15:46)
Differentiating Rich and Wealthy (00:17:32)
Wealth Beyond Money (00:19:51)
Influence of Family Background on Money Beliefs (00:21:20)
Communication About Money (00:22:40)
Fear of Financial Loss in Relationships (00:23:25)
Pricing Themselves Out of the Dating Pool (00:24:12)
Contributions in Relationships (00:25:35)
Navigating Different Financial Backgrounds (00:28:00)
Frugality vs. Spending Comfort (00:32:01)
Coupon Encounter (00:33:03)
Financial Conversations (00:34:06)
Creating Financial Intimacy (00:35:38)
Side-by-Side Conversations (00:36:27)
Vulnerability in Conversations (00:37:08)
Joyful Spending (00:38:38)
Unpopular Opinions (00:39:50)
Divorce Edition Cards (00:40:24)
Impact of Financial Relationships (00:40:55)
Listener Question on Social Anxiety (00:42:00)
Building Connections (00:44:38)
Taking Baby Steps (00:47:39)
Engaging with the Audience (00:48:42)
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Take a sneak peak into a private coaching session with our listener, Michelle, as Damona identifies the dating loops and myths that are keeping this Dates & Mates Method graduate from finding the relationship she desires. Listen in as Michelle comes to a realization about the men she’s been dating and why it hasn’t worked out. And help yourself along the way as Damona shares quick tips and takeaways that you can apply right away to your own dating dilemmas.
Ready to break free of your dating loops? Get Damona’s signature online program, The Dating Accelerator at 10% off (for limited time only) using the code PODCAST10: DamonaHoffman.com/program
Only 2 spots remain for the VIP one-on-one coaching program this year. Serious applicants should book an assessment call: DamonaHoffman.com/introcall
Submit your questions on any of the socials @DamonaHoffman or by visiting DamonaHoffman.com
TIMESTAMPS
Introduction to the Episode (00:00:00)
Coaching Insights (00:00:59)
Michelle's Experience (00:02:47)
Appreciation for Coaching (00:04:41)
Transformational Skills (00:05:50)
Dating While Pregnant (00:06:05)
Desire for Partnership (00:06:53)
Impact of Solo Parenting on Dating (00:08:47)
Understanding High Standards (00:10:15)
Trusting Oneself (00:11:00)
Freeing Yourself from Pressure (00:11:32)
Encouragement to Freeze Eggs (00:12:11)
Embracing Options in Dating (00:14:39)
Current Dating Life (00:15:26)
Effective Screening Process (00:16:15)
Invitation to Continue Conversation (00:17:13)
The Importance of Boundaries (00:18:11)
Mindset for Successful Conversations (00:18:27)
Challenges with Dating Separated Individuals (00:19:14)
Physical Attraction and Curiosity (00:20:23)
Recognizing Anxiety in Dating (00:21:20)
Discovering Availability Issues (00:21:40)
Misleading Profiles and Aliases (00:23:32)
Learning to Say No (00:24:38)
Exploring the Other Camp (00:25:07)
Signs of Attraction and Availability (00:26:05)
Disappointment in Dating Dynamics (00:27:17)
The Complexity of Attraction (00:28:19)
Nurturing vs. Romantic Dynamics (00:31:01)
Finding the Right Words (00:32:08)
Navigating Emotional Intensity (00:33:57)
Testing Attraction in Early Dates (00:35:12)
Belief and Self-Responsibility (00:37:02)
Inheriting Stories (00:37:50)
Rewriting Personal Narratives (00:39:14)
Mindset Shifts and Mantras (00:41:10)
Attraction Dynamics (00:43:10)
Navigating Dating While Parenting (00:46:07)
Reflection on Progress (00:48:21)
Encouragement and Support (00:51:07)
Coaching Transformation Invitation (00:52:14)
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Meghan Keane, the founder of NPR’s Life Kit, shares her new book, “Party of One: Be Your Own Best Partner”. Listen in as she peels back the layers of our complicated feelings about being single and dissects the ways that singlism could be dealt with in your own life. It’s time to embrace your single life or the singles in your life so that we can all thrive together regardless of our relationship status. Our Dear Damona question this week is: I recently reconnected with a casual long term friend. How do I figure out if he likes me without making a fool of myself?
Fun little announcement, my meditation program is now back on the Dates & Mates website. If you want to meditate and visualize your way out of stressing about your singlehood. Let me help you. Look for my meditation collection on the homepage of DamonaHoffman.com today!
Submit your questions on any of the socials @DamonaHoffman or by visiting her website DamonaHoffman.com
TIMESTAMPS
Introduction to Singlehood (00:00:00)
Embracing Singlehood (00:01:03)
Interview with Meghan Kane (00:02:54)
Navigating Societal Expectations (00:03:18).
Understanding Singleism (00:06:24)
Confronting Single Shame (00:09:30)
Transforming Thoughts: From Why to What (00:10:41)
The Power of Storytelling (00:14:50)
Intimidation in Dating (00:16:54)
The Complexity of Strong Women (00:17:01)
Reframing Intimidation (00:18:00)
Questioning Marriage (00:19:00)
Voyeurism in Dating (00:20:00)
Building Intentional Friendships (00:21:54)
Diversity in Friendships (00:22:36)
Making the First Move (00:23:15)
Finding Friends with Shared Values (00:24:56)
Lowering the Stakes in Friendships (00:25:50)
Digital Connections (00:27:18)
Mindset Shifts After Relationships (00:30:32)
Radical Acceptance in Singlehood (00:31:52)
Values Work and Radical Acceptance (00:33:01)
Life Values Inventory (00:34:04)
Building Goals Around Values (00:34:50)
Changing Scripts in Dating (00:36:35)
Unexpected Partnerships (00:37:25)
Maintaining Individuality in Relationships (00:38:53)
Supporting Single Friends (00:39:34)
Self-Work and Future Relationships (00:41:46)
Unpopular Opinion on Dating (00:42:14)
Understanding Dating Apps and Intentions (00:49:25)
Challenging Negative Narratives (00:50:23)
Creating Your Own Love Story (00:51:33)
Upcoming Episode Teaser (00:52:45)
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Damona dedicates this week’s episode to YOU! Whether you’re in a relationship or looking for love, she is answering your toughest Dear Damona questions, like:
I feel like my partner isn’t matching my efforts. How can I get him to be more of a caretaker?
I want to stay friends with my exes but I find it incredibly painful. Am I self sabotaging?
I thought we had fun but they said they didn’t feel chemistry…what went wrong?
An ex once said my lack of questions was a red flag, but I think it's a difference in communication styles. What do you think?
Find Damona and submit your questions on any of the socials @DamonaHoffman or by visiting her website DamonaHoffman.com/contact
Only 1 spot left for VIP coaching this fall. Is it you? Register for an intro call at DamonaHoffman.com/introcall and find out!
TIMESTAMPS
Intro (00:00:00)
Managing expectations in relationships (00:01:28)
Communicating needs in relationships (00:02:02)
Are love languages real? (00:05:25)
Self-sabotaging in friendships (00:06:44)
Navigating chemistry and attraction (00:10:50)
Flirting techniques to enhance attraction (00:12:17)
The impact of date venues on chemistry (00:15:49)
Communication Styles in Dating (00:18:11)
Questions as Indicators of Interest (00:19:13)
Nervousness and Connection (00:20:12)
Red Flags Revisited (00:21:22)
Interpreting Signs and Signals (00:22:26)
Inclusivity in Dating Advice (00:23:35)
The Importance of Follow-Up Questions (00:24:43)
Engagement in Conversations (00:25:51)
Listener Interaction Invitation (00:26:59)
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Kiaundra Jackson, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, unpacks how therapy language is influencing our dating lives and shares why it’s essential to move beyond labels to truly thrive in our relationships. She also shares the telltale signs of toxic relationships. Our dear Damona question this week is: I've used them all, but none seem to be a good fit. Is it me or the apps?
Ready to break free of your dating loops? Get Damona’s signature online program, The Dating Accelerator for a limited-time-only for 10% off using the code PODCAST10 at DamonaHoffman.com/program
Submit your questions on any of the socials @DamonaHoffman or by visiting her website DamonaHoffman.com
TIMESTAMPS
Introduction to Toxic Relationships (00:00:00)
Guest Introduction (00:02:05)
Rise of Dating Burnout (00:02:25)
Importance of Healthy Relationships (00:03:10)
Modeling Healthy Relationships (00:04:18)
Personal Accountability in Relationships (00:06:10)
Elements of Healthy Relationships (00:07:24)
Taking Inventory of Past Relationships (00:10:10)
Signs of Toxic Relationships (00:11:37)
Understanding Narcissism (00:12:42)
Manipulation vs. Healthy Goals (15:13)
Setting Boundaries (17:20)
Handling Triggered Reactions (19:28)
Recognizing Relationship Dynamics (24:30)
The Importance of Slow Love (28:47)
Healing from Toxic Relationships (00:31:11)
Unpacking Emotional Luggage (00:31:32)
Rushing into New Relationships (00:31:54)
The Process of Unpacking (00:32:33)
Recognizing Healthy vs. Toxic Traits (00:33:18)
When to Share Personal History (00:34:06)
Finding the Right Time to Share (00:35:00)
Ongoing Conversations About Baggage (00:37:54)
Unpopular Opinion on Relationship Work (00:39:03)
Perspective on Relationship Challenges (00:39:57)
Invitation to Deeper Connection (00:40:17)
Navigating Dating Apps (00:41:42)
Understanding Dating App Experiences (00:42:11)
Adjusting to Online Dating (00:43:17)
Common Experience on Dating Apps (00:44:16)
Finding New Dating Opportunities (00:45:21)
Navigating Dating Apps (00:46:17)
Understanding App Dynamics (00:47:18)
Managing Expectations with Dating Apps (00:48:19)
Addressing Dating Burnout (00:49:13)
Upcoming Dear Damona Episode (00:50:13)
Halloween Dating Horror Stories Call (00:50:13)
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Take a sneak peak into a private coaching session with our listener, Staci, as Damona identifies the dating loops and myths that are keeping this single mom from experiencing the relationship she desires. Along the way, Damona shares quick tips and takeaways that you can apply right away to your own dating dilemmas.
Ready to break free of your dating loops? Get Damona’s signature online program, The Dating Accelerator today for 10% off using the code PODCAST10 at DamonaHoffman.com/program
submit your questions on any of the socials @DamonaHoffman or by visiting her website DamonaHoffman.com
TIMESTAMPS
Introduction to the Coaching Session (00:00:00)
Damona's Experience (00:01:00)
Staci's Introduction (00:03:14)
Goals for the Session (00:04:08)
Staci's Dating History (00:05:10)
Burnout from Dating Apps (00:06:43).
Impact of the Pandemic (00:08:17)
Self-Discovery in Dating (00:09:13).
Shifting Perspectives (00:10:21)
Dating App Dynamics (00:11:35)
Choosing vs. Being Chosen (00:13:56)
Dating After 50 (00:15:25)
Challenges in Conversations (00:17:10)
Understanding the Texting Trap (00:18:08)
Developing a Texting Strategy (00:18:46)
Breaking Free from Canned Responses (00:20:01)
Recognizing Exhausted Energy (00:20:57)
Exploring Offline Dating (00:25:01)
Finding Connection in New Experiences (00:26:14)
Mindset and Clarity on Dating Goals (00:27:48)
Affirmations and Attraction (00:28:35)
Visualizing the Ideal Partner (00:32:31)
Exploring Fitness as a Dating Venue (00:34:04)
Flirting Skills (00:37:08)
Flirting Formula (00:37:41)
Roleplay Practice (00:39:19)
Challenge Accepted (00:41:01)
The Power of Touch (00:41:33)
Living Vision (00:44:53)
Flirting and Connection (00:45:59)
Feeling Inspired (00:46:42)
Closing Thoughts (00:48:31)
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Mayday! It’s a dating burnout crisis! Damona gives a master class about the causes, the current stats, and THE FIX for the apathy and frustration that many daters are feeling today. In this episode, you will learn:
The #1 secret weapon for building connection
How to reclaim your power and replenish after burnout
Top tips for avoiding burnout on dating apps
Insider secrets or offline dating
Protecting your peace with friends and loved ones
And, how to reframe your dating burnout and turn it into fuel for romance
Want to learn more? Find Damona and submit your questions on any of the socials @DamonaHoffman or by visiting her website DamonaHoffman.com/contact
TIMESTAMPS
Introduction to Dating Burnout (00:00:00)
Defining Burnout (00:00:57)
Complexities of Modern Dating (00:02:07)
Zombie Dating Explained (00:08:11)
Dating Hygiene Tips (00:09:25)
Addressing Apathy with Empathy (00:11:57)
Forming a Connector Circle (00:13:10)
Saying Yes to New Experiences (00:14:14)
Creating a Comprehensive Dating Plan (00:15:28)
Tracking Progress in Dating (00:17:48)
Finding a Dating Accountability Buddy (00:18:50)
Quieting Naysayers (00:19:53)
Reframing Dating Burnout (00:21:07)
What’s inside the Book "F the Fairy Tale" (00:21:07)
Listener Review Highlight (00:22:05)
Encouragement to Share the Episode (00:22:05)
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Damona dedicates this week’s episode to YOU! Whether you’ve listened to 12 seasons or 12 episodes, she is answering your toughest Dear Damona questions, like:
I’m stuck in a first date rut. How do I turn things around to find lasting love?
How do I delicately tell my match that family is important, but relationships need to be a priority too?
There’s a big drinking culture where I live. How do I meet singles who share my more laid back vibe?
And, I’ve done the work, but I can’t seem to attract someone who’s done the same. Is it time to lower my standards?
Find Damona and submit your questions on any of the socials @DamonaHoffman or by visiting her website DamonaHoffman.com/contact
And, are YOU tired of being comfortably single? We are enrolling NOW for Damona’s signature group coaching program, The Dates & Mates Method! Sure, you’ve been fine on your own but just imagine how the RIGHT person could add to your life… If you’re ready to create a dating plan and date differently this fall, then this is the time to sign up. Don’t miss out on a limited number of spots in this annual program. Learn more at DamonaHoffman.com/method
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Brenden Durell, intimacy expert on Netflix's Too Hot To Handle, guides us towards a deeper connection within with exercises that he practiced on the show and inspired by his intimacy retreat. Our Dear Damona question this week is: I find myself falling for men who either go all in or don’t give me the time of day. How can I change my pattern?
Follow Brenden on Instagram @BrendenDurell and be sure to check out his work at BrendenDurell.com
Look out for his “Inspired Intimacy Challenge” on socials and the Intimacy in the Jungle retreat in October.
And, we are enrolling NOW for Damona’s signature group coaching program, The Dates & Mates Method! If you’re ready to create a dating plan and date differently this fall, then this is the time to sign up. Don’t miss out on a limited number of spots in this annual program. Learn more at DamonaHoffman.com/method
TIMESTAMPS
Introduction to Intimacy (00:00:00)
Mirror Work Begins (00:00:09)
Understanding Intimacy (00:00:13)
Brendan's Background (00:02:05)
Location and Energy (00:02:41)
Premise of "Too Hot to Handle" (00:04:19)
Evolution of Brendan's Role (00:06:00)
Mirror Exercise Explanation (00:08:05)
Impact of Reality TV (00:10:07)
Apologizing to Oneself (00:11:23)
Historical Context of Mirrors (00:12:23)
Power of Self-Forgiveness (00:14:26)
Intimacy Retreats (00:16:49)
The Connection with Mother Earth (00:18:00)
City Slicker vs. Nature (00:18:18)
Walking Through Discomfort (00:19:17)
Presence in the Moment (00:20:22)
Reframing Time Pressure (00:24:51)
Rites of Passage Experience (00:26:08)
Intimacy in the Jungle Retreat (00:28:46)
Embracing the Unknown (00:30:09)
Renegotiating Commitments (00:32:35)
God Exists in Everything (00:34:00)
Exploring Intimacy Across Cultures (00:34:46)
Curiosity in Personal Growth (00:35:52)
Demystifying Intimacy (00:36:40)
Reframing Perspectives on Pleasure (00:36:51)
Listener's Dating Struggles (00:38:49)
Prioritizing Self-Love (00:40:02)
Understanding Relationship Patterns (00:41:08)
Setting Boundaries in Dating (00:42:39)
The Importance of Inner Intimacy (00:45:26)
Invitation to Join the Program (00:46:32)
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Jeff Guenther, AKA TherapyJeff on Instagram, joins Damona in the premiere of Season 12 of Dates & Mates for a state of the date address! They cover all phases of the dating journey from clarifying what you’re seeking to first dates, defining the relationship and even planning for the dreaded breakup. The Dear Damona question this week is: What’s the best way to reach out to someone new on LinkedIn?
Be sure to follow Jeff on Instagram @TherapyJeff and grab a copy of his new book, Big Dating Energy, on shelves now!
And get Damona’s bestselling book “F the Fairy Tale” in ebook, audiobook, and hardcover everywhere books are sold (FtheFairyTaleBook.com)
This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Get convenient, online therapy with BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com/DATESANDMATES today to get 10% off your first month.
TIMESTAMPS
Introduction to Season 12 (00:00:00)
Overview of the Episode (00:02:06)
Introducing Therapy Jeff (00:04:29)
Jeff's Book Release (00:05:00)
Collaborating with an Ex (00:06:47)
Personal Insights in the Book (00:08:48)
Clarifying Deal Breakers (00:12:04)
Understanding Relationship Needs (00:15:18)
The Role of Fears in Dating (00:18:31)
Dating Apps Discussion (00:20:07)
The Impact of Dating Apps on Love (23:20)
The Shift in Dating Dynamics (23:41)
Boundaries with Technology (24:27)
The Need for Healthy Relationships (27:48)
Imagining Ideal Dating Apps (28:16)
Cultural Changes in Dating Apps (29:39)
Tips for Long-term Relationship Survival (30:19)
Navigating Conflict in Relationships (31:59)
Communication After Intimacy (33:10)
Creating Sexual Energy (35:24)
Understanding Breakups (36:45)
Ethical Breakup Practices (39:05)
The Value of Planning in Relationships (41:38)
The Intimacy of Breakup Conversations (43:09)
Listener Question on LinkedIn Outreach (44:02)
Introduction and Connector Circle (00:46:04)
Sliding into DMs (00:46:59)
Approaching on LinkedIn (00:48:11)
Navigating Online Connections (00:49:19)
Promoting the Dates & Mates Method (00:50:16)
Call for Listener Questions (00:51:13)
Wrap-Up and Guest Teaser (00:52:06)
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We all hope to feel something special on that first date, but true love takes time, and so does trust. Damona debunks The Chemistry Myth and The Soulmate Myth while offering real solutions to today’s dating troubles. Based on themes from her new book, F The Fairy Tale, this episode highlights The Goals Pillar and The Values Pillar in a conversation between Damona and love and relationship experts, Carol Allen & Katherine Woodward, in one of the top panels from the F the Fairy Tale Forum last year.
Be sure to follow Carol on Instagram @CarolAllenAstrologer and get a special discount on her annual personal success calendar at DamonaHoffman.com/mycalendar
And, be sure to follow Katherine on Instagram @KatherineWoodwardThomas and check out her work at KatherineWoodwardThomas.com
Get Damona’s bestselling book “F the Fairy Tale” in ebook, audiobook, and hardcover everywhere books are sold (FtheFairyTaleBook.com)
This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Get convenient, online therapy with BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com/DATESANDMATES today to get 10% off your first month.
TIMESTAMPS
(00:00:00) Introduction to the Episode
(00:01:07) Transition to Communication and Trust
(00:02:04) The Chemistry Myth
(00:03:05) Introducing Guests Katherine and Carol
(00:03:56) Insights on Communication
(00:06:45) Astrological Compatibility Discussion
(00:10:10) Understanding Relationship Dynamics
(00:14:23) Scarcity Mindset in Dating
(00:18:08) Listener Questions and Support
(00:19:13) Dating Fatigue at 26
(00:20:10) Late Bloomers in Love
(00:22:19) Faith and Trust in Dating
(00:24:09) Top Dealbreakers in Relationships
(00:25:42) Self-Reflection in Relationships
(00:27:54) Abundant Mindset Tips
(00:29:31) From Wallflower to Proficient Dater
(00:30:12) Strategic Dating Approach
(00:32:27) Promoting Personal Success Calendars
(00:33:20) Book Reviews and Community Engagement
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It’s tempting to date by a list of preferred qualities and a set of prescribed rules, but these myths prevent singles from discovering more fulfilling relationships. Damona debunks The List Myth and The Rules Myth and offers real solutions to today’s common dating problems. Based on themes from her new book, F The Fairy Tale, this episode highlights The Goals Pillar and The Values Pillar in a conversation between Damona and love and relationship experts, Orna and Matthew Walters and Evan Marc Katz.
Be sure to follow Evan on Instagram @RealEvanMarcKatz and check out his work at EvanMarcKatz.com
And, be sure to follow Orna and Matthew on Instagram @OrnaAndMatthew and pre-order their new book at Barnes & Noble, Getting It Right This Time by visiting: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/getting-it-right-this-time-orna-walters/1145412458
Get Damona’s bestselling book “F the Fairy Tale” in ebook, audiobook, and hardcover everywhere books are sold (FtheFairyTaleBook.com)
This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Get convenient, online therapy with BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com/DATESANDMATES today to get 10% off your first month.
TIMESTAMPS
(00:00:00) Introduction to the Episode
(00:01:05) The Goals and Values Pillars
(00:02:10) Breaking the Rules Myth
(00:03:18) Introduction of Guests
(00:06:12) The Importance of Values
(00:08:03) Engaging Conversations
(00:11:01) Understanding Love Imprints
(00:12:36) The Role of the Subconscious
(00:14:03) Client-Centered Approach
(00:15:50) Masterclass on Attraction
(00:16:26) Listener Questions Segment
(00:16:50) Evan's Jdate Experience
(00:18:07) Crafting a Great Profile
(00:19:57) Storytelling in Profiles
(00:21:09) Best Dating Sites for Older Women
(00:22:11) Pressure on Dating Apps
(00:23:40) Women’s Standards in Dating
(00:24:46) Meeting Men Outside Comfort Zones
(00:26:47) Investment in Dating
(00:28:22) Closing Remarks and Book Promotion
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The idea of one perfect match is attractive, but the pursuit of soulmates actually prevents singles from moving into committed relationships AND from staying when things get tough. Damona tackles The Soulmate Myth revealing how it leads to an either or mentality and outlines how to approach dating with an abundance mindset instead.
Get Damona’s bestselling book “F the Fairy Tale” in ebook, audiobook, and hardcover everywhere books are sold (FtheFairyTaleBook.com)
Then join our Book Squad! If you review “F The Fairy Tale” and submit it at DamonaHoffman.com/booksquad before July 31st, you’ll be invited to an exclusive Q&A session with Damona!
This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Get convenient, online therapy with BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com/DATESANDMATES today to get 10% off your first month.
TIMESTAMPS
(00:00:00) Introduction to the Soulmate Myth
(00:01:06) The Soulmate Myth Explained
(00:02:27) Shifting Mindsets
(00:04:37) Listener Question on Soulmates
(00:03:29) Statistics on Belief in Soulmates
(00:05:59) The Impact of Dating Apps
(00:07:15) Probability of Finding a Soulmate
(00:08:42) Destiny vs. Growth Mindset
(00:10:13) Myth Origins and Beliefs
(00:11:16) Invitation to Join the Book Squad
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Feeling butterflies with a match may seem like a good sign for your romantic future, but many times it's a window to the past. Damona busts The Chemistry Myth so that you can stop missing the true markers of relationship success and stop second guessing your dating choices. Plus, she answers this spicy Dear Damona question: How fast is too fast to have sex with a new person?
Get Damona’s bestselling book “F the Fairy Tale” in ebook, audiobook, and hardcover everywhere books are sold (FtheFairyTaleBook.com)
Then join our Book Squad! If you review “F The Fairy Tale” and submit it at DamonaHoffman.com/booksquad before July 31st, you’ll be invited to an exclusive Q&A session with Damona!
This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Get convenient, online therapy with BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com/DATESANDMATES today to get 10% off your first month.
TIMESTAMPS
(00:00:10) The Chemistry Myth
(00:00:55) Personal Experience with Chemistry Myth
(00:04:27) Physiological Aspect of Chemistry
(00:05:33) Dear Damona Question on Slow Love
(00:07:42) Tossing out Timelines
(00:08:41) Safe Sex and Boundaries
(00:11:13) Joining the Book Squad
(00:12:24) Conclusion and Invitation
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Swipe apps have gamified dating but that doesn’t mean you have to play it their way! Damona dives deep into The Rules Myth with love and relationship experts Ariel Ford and Francesca Hoagie in one of her favorite panels from the F the The Fairy Tale Forum last year. Together they address how singles are hungry for shortcuts to finding love and reveal why this approach may be preventing them from making fulfilling connections.
Get Damona’s bestselling book “F the Fairy Tale” in ebook, audiobook, and hardcover everywhere books are sold (FtheFairyTaleBook.com)
Then join our Book Squad! If you review “F The Fairy Tale” and submit it at DamonaHoffman.com/booksquad before July 31st, you’ll be invited to an exclusive Q&A session with Damona!
Follow Arielle Ford on Instagram @ArielleFord_author and pick up a copy of her international bestseller, “THE SOULMATE SECRET: Manifest The Love of Your Life With The Law of Attraction”.
Follow Francesca Hogi on Instagram @DearFranny and check out the Dear Franny Podcast!
This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Get convenient, online therapy with BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com/DATESANDMATES today to get 10% off your first month.
TIMESTAMPS
(00:00:00) Dates & Mates Intro
(00:01:06) The rules myth
(00:02:10) Introduction of Ariel Ford and Francesca Hogi
(00:04:34) Defining love
(00:06:30) Navigating dating without rules
(00:09:08) Evolution of relationships
(00:13:13) Existence of soulmates
(00:16:58) Meeting people outside of dating apps
(00:18:02) The potential of organic connections
(00:19:52) Manifesting love and the meet cute mindset
(00:21:36) The abundance mindset and love before first sight
(00:26:06) Dating in midlife and redefining compatibility
(00:29:44) Embracing the process of dating and love skills
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Do you date by a list? How’s that going for you? Damona tackles The List Myth in the second episode of the “F The Fairy Tale'' Summer Series. Plus, Damona shares some dating math to illustrate how The List Myth hurts you more than helps you…and what you should focus on instead.
Get Damona’s bestselling book “F the Fairy Tale” in ebook, audiobook, and hardcover everywhere books are sold (FtheFairyTaleBook.com)
Then join our Book Squad! If you review “F The Fairy Tale” and submit it at DamonaHoffman.com/booksquad before July 31st, you’ll be invited to an exclusive Q&A session with Damona!
This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Get convenient, online therapy with BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com/DATESANDMATES today to get 10% off your first month.
TIMESTAMPS
(00:00:00) Intro to the "F the Fairy Tale" summer series.
(00:01:09) The list myth
(00:02:21) Narrowing the list
(00:05:55) Importance of leaving reviews
(00:06:58) Announcement of the next episode
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