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Amanda de Cadenet became famous as a teenager, but behind the headlines was a young girl trying to survive. This is the story of the woman behind the image.
In this episode of Begin Again, Amanda de Cadenet joins Davina to talk about fame, shame, care, motherhood, sobriety, recovery, and what it means to finally tell your own story.
Amanda opens up about growing up fast in the public eye, going out clubbing at 14, being surrounded by older men, and trying to act like an adult long before she was ready. She reflects on the pain of feeling unprotected, the shame she carried as a young woman, and how being put into care while already famous became one of the most frightening and defining experiences of her life.
Davina and Amanda also explore the brutal reality of press intrusion, from paparazzi outside her school and care home to the tabloid body-shaming that eventually pushed her to leave the UK and start again in Los Angeles. Amanda speaks honestly about becoming a mother at 19, getting sober, breaking generational cycles, and why her daughter helped save her life.
They also discuss Amanda’s work as a photographer, storyteller and advocate for women, including how her own experiences of postpartum depression, grief and shame led her to create spaces where women could speak openly about the things they had been taught to hide.
At its heart, this is a conversation about survival, self-forgiveness, and reclaiming the parts of yourself that the world tried to define for you.
Amanda de Cadenet reminds us that shame can only survive in silence, and that sometimes beginning again means finally telling the truth in your own words.
🌟 Like, comment, and subscribe for more honest conversations about identity, growth, and beginning again. Tap the bell to stay connected with new episodes of Begin Again.
Follow us here:
📸 www.instagram.com/beginagain
🎥 https://www.tiktok.com/@beginagainpod
✨Follow Amanda de Cadenet: https://www.instagram.com/amandadecadenet/
✨Sign up for the Begin Again newsletter for all your behind the scenes access, recommendations and much much more at: https://linkly.link/2g2xm
(00:00) Intro
(01:31) How Amanda And Davina First Met
(02:16) Why Clubbing At 14 Changed Everything
(03:32) How Absent Parents Shaped Amanda’s London Upbringing
(08:48) What Happens When Vulnerability Meets Predatory Men
(11:20) How Drugs And Alcohol Entered Amanda’s Life So Young
(13:19) SexualAssault At 14
(14:54) Why Amanda Went Into Care After Being Arrested
(26:23) How Amanda Began A Relationship With Duran Duran’s John Taylor (28:00) What Hosting The Word Really Meant For Amanda
(32:31) Why Media Harassment Pushed Amanda To Leave The UK
(35:15) How Atlanta Saved Amanda’s Life
(36:53) What Getting Sober Finally Made Possible
(38:23) How Amanda Started Over In America Without Fame
(40:21) How Amanda Found Her Passion For Photography
(44:31) When Amanda Photographed Keanu Reeves For Vogue
(45:59) The Real Story Behind The Conversation With Demi Moore
(53:31) How Grief Led Amanda To Become A Counselor
(58:21) Amanda’s Advice For Processing Grief In A Healthy Way
Sponsored by:
Do Health - The waitlist is open. Begin Again listeners get fixed early access pricing when they sign up today at dohealth.co/beginagain use code BEGINAGAIN
Saily - Download from the app store and use code DAVINA at the checkout for 15% off
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What happens when years of bullying, shame and addiction convince you that you're not worthy of being yourself?
In this episode, Humphrey O'Driscoll shares his remarkable journey of growing up gay in Carrigaline, the relentless bullying he endured, and how alcohol and cocaine became his way of escaping the pain.
He opens up about losing the love of his life to addiction, hitting rock bottom, and the moment he chose recovery over a life that was destroying him.
Today, Humphrey is sober, comfortable in his own skin, and determined to help others know that there is hope.
This is a powerful conversation about identity, addiction, recovery and self-acceptance.
If this story resonates with you, please leave a comment and hit that subscribe button, it really helps.
🎧 This episode is proudly sponsored by ADHD Now, the online clinic transforming ADHD assessment and care across Ireland. If you are seeking an ADHD assessment or support, visit adhdnow.com today.
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Three men have been arrested and charged for their involvement in the murder of Robbie Lawlor. Who are the suspects, and why are they the only people before the courts?
This episode of Double Cross: The Murder of Robbie Lawlor was originally released in January 2025.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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This week, I'm joined by one of Ireland's most recognisable content creators, Caoimhe McGinley also known as The Big Hill House on Instagram.
From building one of Ireland's best loved lifestyle pages to rebuilding her own life behind the scenes, Caoimhe shares an honest conversation about love, loss, divorce, motherhood, grief, and finding the strength to start again.
She also speaks publicly for the first time about a defamation case she says changed her life, and why she's ready to tell her story.
A powerful conversation about resilience, healing, and discovering strength through life's toughest moments.
🎧 Proudly sponsored by ADHD Now, the online clinic transforming ADHD assessment and care across Ireland. If you're seeking an ADHD assessment or support, visit adhdnow.com.
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Police in Northern Ireland assemble a list of twenty people under investigation for the murder of Robbie Lawlor. While some of the names are very familiar, others are not.
This episode of Double Cross: The Murder of Robbie Lawlor was originally released in January 2025.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Robbie Lawlor's time in Belfast is short. In the aftermath of his death, who is in the frame for his murder?
This episode of Double Cross: The Murder of Robbie Lawlor was originally released in January 2025.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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After the murder of Keane Mulready-Woods, Robbie Lawlor heads to Belfast, and a whole new world of trouble.
This episode of Double Cross: The Murder of Robbie Lawlor was originally released in January 2025.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Robbie Lawlor's response to the taunting of the teenagers who stole his gym bag could not have been predicted—the murder of Keane Mulready-Woods shocked the world.
This episode of Double Cross: The Murder of Robbie Lawlor was originally released in December 2024.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Robbie Lawlor’s involvement in the burgeoning Drogheda feud sparks fear amongst the gardaí, while his erratic and violent behaviour terrifies those close to him.
This episode of Double Cross: The Murder of Robbie Lawlor was originally released in December 2024.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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How did Robbie Lawlor earn his fearsome reputation as a cold-blooded killer?
Nicola Tallant looks at his early crimes, and the ruthless murders that made his name.
This episode of Double Cross: The Murder of Robbie Lawlor was originally released in November 2024.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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When Robbie Lawlor was murdered outside a house in the Ardoyne area of Belfast in April 2020, reporters were left with more questions than answers.
What was one of Ireland’s most feared criminals doing in the north? Why had he crossed the border? Who had the audacity to arrange for him to be shot while up there?
This episode of Double Cross: The Murder of Robbie Lawlor was originally released in November 2024.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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For years, Lorna Luxe has let people into her life. Now, she opens up about the loss that changed everything.
In this episode of Begin Again, Lorna Luxe, also known as Lorna Andrews, joins Davina for her first and only interview since losing her husband John. Together, they speak honestly about grief, love, loneliness, resilience, and what it means to begin again after losing the person who made you feel safe.
Lorna opens up about John’s cancer diagnosis, the final year of their marriage, and the fear John carried at the end: not for himself, but for whether Lorna would be okay without him. She reflects on the deep love they shared, how John protected her, supported her, and filled the space in her life in ways she is only now beginning to understand.
Davina and Lorna also explore the experiences that shaped her long before grief: her dad leaving when she was four, the rejection sensitivity that followed, her relationship with her fiercely protective mum, her eating disorder and how Instagram became the place where her creativity, perfectionism, and eye for beauty turned into a career.
At its heart, this is a conversation about great love, unimaginable loss, and the quiet courage it takes to keep going. Lorna speaks with honesty, humour, and extraordinary openness about learning to live alone, honouring John’s legacy, and discovering that she is more resilient than she ever knew.
Lorna Luxe reminds us that grief does not follow rules, love does not disappear, and sometimes beginning again means carrying the person you lost into everything you do next.
🌟 Like, comment, and subscribe for more honest conversations about grief, love, identity, healing, and beginning again. Tap the bell to stay connected with new episodes of Begin Again.
Follow us here:
📸 www.instagram.com/beginagain
🎥 https://www.tiktok.com/@beginagainpod
✨ Follow Lorna: https://www.instagram.com/lorna/?hl=en
✨ Sign up for the Begin Again newsletter for all your behind the scenes access, recommendations and much much more at: https://linkly.link/2g2xm
(00:00) Intro
(01:29) How Lorna is doing following the death of her husband
(06:41) Lorna's experience of loneliness
(08:11) Lorna learning resilience and being independent in the wake of John's death
(12:39) How Lorna's dad leaving when she was young affected her
(15:34) How Lorna's dad leaving when she was young affected her
(18:11) Lorna's relationship with her mum
(19:28) Lorna's eating disorder and starting her job as a Virgin Atlantic hostess
(26:43) Do Health Ad
(30:48) Lorna's journey to recovering from her eating disorder
(32:37) How Lorna got into Instagram
(35:59) Meeting and falling in love with John
(45:51) How Lorna and John maintained such a strong relationship
(48:50) How Lorna and John used Love Languages
(51:35) Lorna on her final year with John, beginning again and honouring his legacy
(1:00:54) What John wanted for Lorna after he died
(1:01:50) How Lorna is dealing with grief
(1:04:14) Lorna reads a letter from her mother
(1:07:58) Davina's admiration for Lorna
Sponsored by:
Do Health - The waitlist is open. Begin Again listeners get fixed early access pricing when they sign up today at dohealth.co/beginagain use code BEGINAGAIN
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices -
With his father Christy Snr locked up in Belgium for money laundering, Daniel takes control of the cartel’s drug dealing operation.
After he is released, Christy is determined to stay out of jail and moves to the new gangster’s paradise in Dubai.
The outbreak of the Hutch-Kinahan feud would see him play a key role in the cartel’s propaganda operation for the comfort of the Gulf State.
Christy Kinahan: The Dapper Don was originally released as a subscriber-only series in November 2025 on crimeworld.com.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Staring down decades in prison, Bomber attempts a final gamble by orchestrating a fake weapons surrender from behind bars to trick the authorities into granting him a lighter sentence.
The deception backfires spectacularly when compromised encrypted messages unmask his lies, resulting in additional years of jail time and dragging his own son and family into the ruins of his collapsed empire.
The Science of Fear: The Bloody Reign of Thomas 'Bomber' Kavanagh was originally released as a subscriber-only series in January 2026 on crimeworld.com.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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A seemingly trivial pink stun gun found atop a kitchen cupboard provides the legal hook to pull Bomber from his life of luxury and lock him behind bars while investigators build their massive narcotics case.
The untouchable persona of the cartel boss finally shatters during a high-stakes interrogation, where the sheer weight of the evidence causes him to physically collapse as the reality of a 25-year sentence sets in.
The Science of Fear: The Bloody Reign of Thomas 'Bomber' Kavanagh was originally released as a subscriber-only series in January 2026 on crimeworld.com.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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As Bomber waits in the shadows of his English mansion, a single forgotten logistics document from an Irish raid allows the National Crime Agency to bridge the gap between his legitimate front and his billion-euro drug empire.
Meticulous digital forensics begin to peel back the layers of his encrypted secrecy, exposing “The Gaffer” as the cold CEO of a transnational narcotics machine that law enforcement is finally ready to dismantle.
The Science of Fear: The Bloody Reign of Thomas 'Bomber' Kavanagh was originally released as a subscriber-only series in January 2026 on crimeworld.com.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Singer-songwriter and actor Will Young speaks with disarming honesty about surviving decades of trauma, hypervigilance, and the long shadow of shame. Following a breakdown during Cabaret, Will opens up about spending over ten years in a state of severe dissociation, describing it as living behind frosted glass, unable to recognize faces or feel joy.He also shares his profound path to healing through Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy, learning to befriend the frozen parts of his past rather than fight them. It's a powerful and reassuring look at how the core self can endure even the deepest pain, and how a simple daily act of kindness from a neighbor ultimately helped save his life.This episode covers the following themes: Trauma, Shame, Dissociation, Therapy, and Healing.Need Support?Samaritans: Call 116 123 or visit samaritans.orgNarcotics Anonymous: na.orgAlcoholics Anonymous: alcoholics-anonymous.org.ukMental Health Mates: mentalhealthmates.co.ukShout: https: giveusashout.orgIAPT: https://www.england.nhs.uk/mental-health/adults/nhs-talking-therapies/Better Help 👉 Join Matt in Saying It Louder with 10% off Betterhelp Therapy. Click here: https://highpfrmc.com/otm-betterhelp-au Postcode Lottery 👉 Discover how Postcode Lottery players are Powering Hope Together. Click here to find out more: https://highpfrmc.com/otm-postcode-au AG1 👉Head to http://drinkag1.com/onthemend to save £20 on your first month, plus a free welcome kit, Vitamin D3 + K2 and five travel packs Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Sober Girl Society founder Millie Gooch challenges everything we think we know about dependency in a conversation that dismantles the “rock bottom” myth. Despite a successful career and social life, alcohol was quietly affecting her mental health and relationships, leading her to realise she couldn’t keep going as she was.This discussion explores the cycle of “hangxiety” and how drinking is often normalised despite its impact on wellbeing. Millie also reflects on her later ADHD and autism diagnosis, and how it helped her understand why neurodivergent minds can be more vulnerable to using alcohol as relief.From a simple question that can help you reflect on your own relationship with drinking, to the reality that sobriety is only the beginning, this is an honest conversation about dependency, identity, and recovery.This episode covers the following themes: High-Functioning Addiction, Hangxiety, Neurodivergence, Social Stigma, and Authentic Recovery.AG1 👉Head to http://drinkag1.com/onthemend to save £20 on your first month, plus a free welcome kit, Vitamin D3 + K2 and five travel packsBetter Help 👉 Join Matt in Saying It Louder with 10% off Betterhelp Therapy. Click here: https://highpfrmc.com/otm-betterhelp-au Postcode Lottery 👉 Discover how Postcode Lottery players are Powering Hope Together. Click here to find out more: https://highpfrmc.com/otm-postcode-au Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Bomber’s empire begins to unravel, as an innocuous scrap of paper found in a raid of a weapons-filled industrial unit in Dublin gives international law enforcement a thread to follow in their investigations. Meanwhile, a lavish marriage ceremony in Dubai attracts a lot of attention.
The Science of Fear: The Bloody Reign of Thomas 'Bomber' Kavanagh was originally released as a subscriber-only series in January 2026 on crimeworld.com.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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The criminal underworld is shattered when gunmen armed with AK-47s storm a Dublin hotel weigh-in, leaving Bomber’s brother-in-law dead and igniting a “psychotic” revenge feud that turns the city into a war zone.
Forced out of the shadows, Bomber stands shoulder-to-shoulder with Daniel Kinahan at a military-style funeral, a public show of defiance that finally earns him and the gang the undivided attention of international law enforcement.
The Science of Fear: The Bloody Reign of Thomas 'Bomber' Kavanagh was originally released as a subscriber-only series in January 2026 on crimeworld.com.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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