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It’s no secret that boundaries are the key to reclaiming your power, honoring your needs, and living life on your terms. And me showing up week after week on the podcast to lay the foundation for boundary setting is one thing, but hearing the real-life stories of those of us who are taking action and setting boundaries in our lives is inspiring on a whole new level! This week’s episode 282 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about real-life stories of saying no and standing firm!
In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m sharing a series of examples of ways either myself, my listeners, or my clients have put the fundamentals of boundary setting into action in their lives so you can feel inspired to do the same in your life.
Now, some of these boundaries may seem small but when you multiply them by the thousands of ways we’ve compromised ourselves in the past, setting all these little types of boundaries results in the kind of life we want to live.
Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.
Thank you for listening! If you enjoyed this episode, take a screenshot of the episode to post in your stories and tag me! And don’t forget to follow, rate and review the podcast and tell me your key takeaways!
Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/
Are you saying yes when you really want to say no? Are you putting yourself last? Perhaps you're the consummate accommodator whose people-pleasing ways are wearing you out. If so, you're a perfect fit for my 12-week private coaching program!
After Participating in Private Coaching with Barb, You'll...
*Be able to feel peaceful and calm when setting boundaries
*Know how to communicate directly with people
*Your feelings will become more "right-sized"
*Do things because you really want to do them, not because you feel obligated
*Live your life by your own values and feel proud of that
*Learn to keep the focus on yourself and still be kind and helpful
*Come closer to realizing your authentic identity
Sign up for a free 30 minute Better Boundaries call with me at this link. https://calendly.com/barb-nangle/better-boundaries-call
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Free Resources on Boundaries
CONNECT WITH BARB NANGLE:
Subscribe to “Friday Fragments” weekly newsletter
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Get a free chapter of my upcoming book: Roadside Recovery
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Recognizing and overcoming codependence can be a profound and life-changing journey, but undoing the deeply engrained layers of this behavior is not easy. I found this out the hard way after hitting what I call my “codependence bottom” after inviting my homeless friend to stay with me, leading to feeling trapped in my own home, and coming to the conclusion that I was codependent. This realization was a huge life shift for me and I want to continue sharing my experiences in hopes that other people can learn from my journey and start to undo their own codependent behaviors. This week’s episode 281 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about understanding codependence, its origins, and how to overcome it!
In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m breaking down the concept of codependence, where it comes from, and actionable steps you can take right now to build the healthy boundaries necessary to overcome codependent tendencies.
Some of the talking points I go over in this episode include:
Codependence is a state of being focused on the needs and behaviors of others while neglecting one’s own wants and needs. Trauma is the root cause of codependence, as it disrupts the development of a stable sense of self. Overcoming codependence requires a long process of self-discovery, healthy boundaries, and focusing on self.I want to hear from you! What further questions do you have about codependence? Is there something I mentioned today that you would like me to expand upon? Send me a DM or an email and let’s chat.
Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/
Are you saying yes when you really want to say no? Are you putting yourself last? Perhaps you're the consummate accommodator whose people-pleasing ways are wearing you out. If so, you're a perfect fit for my 12-week private coaching program!
After Participating in Private Coaching with Barb, You'll...
*Be able to feel peaceful and calm when setting boundaries
*Know how to communicate directly with people
*Your feelings will become more "right-sized"
*Do things because you really want to do them, not because you feel obligated
*Live your life by your own values and feel proud of that
*Learn to keep the focus on yourself and still be kind and helpful
*Come closer to realizing your authentic identity
Sign up for a free 30 minute Better Boundaries call with me at this link. https://calendly.com/barb-nangle/better-boundaries-call
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
ACA Fellowship Text (The Big Red Book or BRB)
Join the Waitlist for the FREE Boundary Building Starter Kit
CONNECT WITH BARB NANGLE:
Subscribe to “Friday Fragments” weekly newsletter
Free boundaries resources
Facebook
Instagram
Work with Barb!
Buy Barb a tea
Get a free chapter of my upcoming book: Roadside Recovery
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For those who have a loved one who is an alcoholic, you understand the uphill battle of finding the right words that will finally get through to them. But the reality is, we are just as powerless over alcohol as the alcoholic is and there is nothing we can do or say that will magically change their addiction. Laurel found this out the hard way and joins me on the podcast today as she shares her powerful journey with Al-Anon and how she learned to let go of the belief that saying the “right” things can stop the alcoholic from drinking, save her marriage, and ultimately protect her family. This week’s episode 280 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about living your truth!
In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, Laurel shares her powerful story of navigating life with an alcoholic spouse and how Al-Anon gave her the strength, support, and resources to set boundaries and live her truth.
Some of the talking points Laurel and I go over in this episode include:
Setting boundaries, detaching from others’ reactions, and learning to not engage in arguments that won’t make a difference are powerful tools in maintaining serenity. Continuing to attend meetings, work the steps, and have a sponsor is essential for personal growth and recovery. The layers of personal growth and self-discovery that unfold over time in recovery.How to educate children addiction safety plans without villainizing the addict.Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/
Are you saying yes when you really want to say no? Are you putting yourself last? Perhaps you're the consummate accommodator whose people-pleasing ways are wearing you out. If so, you're a perfect fit for my 12-week private coaching program!
After Participating in Private Coaching with Barb, You'll...
*Be able to feel peaceful and calm when setting boundaries
*Know how to communicate directly with people
*Your feelings will become more "right-sized"
*Do things because you really want to do them, not because you feel obligated
*Live your life by your own values and feel proud of that
*Learn to keep the focus on yourself and still be kind and helpful
*Come closer to realizing your authentic identity
Sign up for a free 30 minute Better Boundaries call with me at this link. https://calendly.com/barb-nangle/better-boundaries-call
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Ep 278: Breaking Free from Generational Shame and Humiliation
Ep 279: The Blame Game- Recognizing and Releasing the Need to Blame
CONNECT WITH BARB NANGLE:
Subscribe to “Friday Fragments” weekly newsletter
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Content Warning: This episode has brief mentions of the sexual abuse of a child.
One of the things covered in The Solution, a foundational document in ACA is that we will free ourselves from the shame and blame carried over from the past. Shame is just about one of the worst feelings in the world so to avoid it, we can get into the habit of displacing this feeling by blaming others, instead of taking accountability for our part in the situation. As a result, shame and blame go hand in hand. This week’s episode 279 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about the blame game - recognizing and releasing the need to blame.
In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m sharing a follow-up from last week’s episode on shame, ways in which I have recognized the need to blame as a result of feeling shame, and actionable steps you can take right now to identify when you’re putting the blame on others and switch to taking accountability for your part in things.
You can’t change the past, whether that’s what happened to you or what you did, but you can change your reaction patterns, thus, changing the future. That my friends is freedom.
Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.
Thank you for listening! If you enjoyed this episode, take a screenshot of the episode to post in your stories and tag me! And don’t forget to follow, rate and review the podcast and tell me your key takeaways!
Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/
Are you saying yes when you really want to say no? Are you putting yourself last? Perhaps you're the consummate accommodator whose people-pleasing ways are wearing you out. If so, you're a perfect fit for my 12-week private coaching program!
After Participating in Private Coaching with Barb, You'll...
*Be able to feel peaceful and calm when setting boundaries
*Know how to communicate directly with people
*Your feelings will become more "right-sized"
*Do things because you really want to do them, not because you feel obligated
*Live your life by your own values and feel proud of that
*Learn to keep the focus on yourself and still be kind and helpful
*Come closer to realizing your authentic identity
Sign up for a free 30 minute Better Boundaries call with me at this link. https://calendly.com/barb-nangle/better-boundaries-call
CONNECT WITH BARB NANGLE:
Subscribe to “Friday Fragments” weekly newsletter
Free boundaries resources
Facebook
Instagram
Work with Barb!
Buy Barb a tea
Get a free chapter of my upcoming book: Roadside Recovery
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Send us a text
In ACA we say that shame is the legacy of adult children and it is passed down from generation to generation. That’s why we feel shame for things that “normal” people don’t. This week’s episode 278 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about breaking free from generational shame and humiliation!
In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m sharing how, despite the saying that guilt is, ‘I did something wrong’ and shame is ‘I am something wrong,’ for me, it was more frequently that I was supposed to know something that I don’t or I’m supposed to be or do something that I’m not. And that is because of the messages I received from the people around me growing up.
Some of the talking points I go over in this episode include:
Examples of the messages I received from my family that led to this deeply ingrained sense of shame I felt most of my adult life. Things that have made me feel shame and humiliation over the years that other people likely wouldn’t. How setting healthy boundaries helped me know myself better and overcome the shame and humiliation I once felt.Remember, it is fine to seek the approval of others but only when you have your own approval first.
Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.
Thank you for listening! If you enjoyed this episode, take a screenshot of the episode to post in your stories and tag me! And don’t forget to follow, rate and review the podcast and tell me your key takeaways!
Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/
Are you saying yes when you really want to say no? Are you putting yourself last? Perhaps you're the consummate accommodator whose people-pleasing ways are wearing you out. If so, you're a perfect fit for my 12-week private coaching program!
After Participating in Private Coaching with Barb, You'll...
*Be able to feel peaceful and calm when setting boundaries
*Know how to communicate directly with people
*Your feelings will become more "right-sized"
*Do things because you really want to do them, not because you feel obligated
*Live your life by your own values and feel proud of that
*Learn to keep the focus on yourself and still be kind and helpful
*Come closer to realizing your authentic identity
Sign up for a free 30 minute Better Boundaries call with me at this link. https://calendly.com/barb-nangle/better-boundaries-call
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Ep. 17. GUILT AND SHAME
Ep. 179. Freedom from the Lie of Shame - You're Not Inherently Flawed
CONNECT WITH BARB NANGLE:
Subscribe to “Friday Fragments” weekly newsletter
Free boundaries resources
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Buy Barb a tea
Get a free chapter of my upcoming book: Roadside Recovery
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Whether you’re in recovery or not, you may have heard the saying, “If you’re hysterical, it’s historical.” This phrase refers to the times in our lives when we may have an emotional reaction that felt completely out of proportion to the situation at hand and gives some insight into some unresolved trauma from our past. This week’s episode 277 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about the meaning behind the saying, “If you’re hysterical, it’s historical."
Some of the talking points I go over in this episode include:
When we experience a triggering situation in the present, it’s often linked to past trauma, even if we don’t consciously remember the original event. The difference between “big T” and “little t” trauma.The path to healing starts with dealing with the trauma at the root of your reaction, not the present-day trigger.If you’re noticing these emotional triggers pop up in your life, I encourage you to seek support through programs like ACA or work with a trauma-informed therapist to uncover and process past wounds. You’d be surprised how healing it can be.
Are you saying yes when you really want to say no? Are you putting yourself last? Perhaps you're the consummate accommodator whose people-pleasing ways are wearing you out. If so, you're a perfect fit for my 12-week private coaching program!
After Participating in Private Coaching with Barb, You'll...
*Be able to feel peaceful and calm when setting boundaries
*Know how to communicate directly with people
*Your feelings will become more "right-sized"
*Do things because you really want to do them, not because you feel obligated
*Live your life by your own values and feel proud of that
*Learn to keep the focus on yourself and still be kind and helpful
*Come closer to realizing your authentic identity
Sign up for a free 30 minute Better Boundaries call with me at this link. https://calendly.com/barb-nangle/better-boundaries-call
Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.
Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Episodes about denial:
Ep: 16 D-E-N-I-A-L (12 min)
Ep: 23 Denial 2.0 (13 min)
Ep: 182 Denial 3.0 (23 min)
Ep 191: How I Came Out of Denial - My ACA Story (26 min)
Ep 196: Denial 4.0 (24 min)
ACA World Service Organization website
ACA Fellowship Text “The Big Red Book”
CONNECT WITH BARB NANGLE:
Subscribe to “Friday Fragments” weekly newsletter
Free boundaries resources
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Get a free chap
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Many of us in ACA have had to pretend our entire lives in order to feel safe or get our needs met. We acted as though our family was one way knowing full well that was not the case behind closed doors. So let me be clear: acting “as if” is not the same as pretending. It’s a way of acting in a way that changes the long-standing patterns of behavior that keep you from moving forward. This week’s episode 276 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about moving from pretending to purpose- the true power of acting “as if”.
In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m sharing the importance of understanding the motivations behind our actions and how they can impact our personal growth. I also share actionable steps to course-correct the behaviors holding us back and move closer to the life we want to live.
Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.
Thank you for listening! If you enjoyed this episode, take a screenshot of the episode to post in your stories and tag me! And don’t forget to follow, rate and review the podcast and tell me your key takeaways!
Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Ep. 25: Act As If
CONNECT WITH BARB NANGLE:
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I have shared bits and pieces of my reparenting journey throughout my podcast episodes but I have never publicly sat down to share it all in one setting. That is… until I appeared on an episode of the Adult Child podcast with Andrea Ashley. After hearing the little bit of my story that I shared in her community which is affectionately called The Shitshow, Andrea Ashley invited me on her podcast to share my reparenting journey with her audience. This week’s episode 275 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about my reparenting journey as expressed on the Adult Child podcast!
Support the show by becoming a Patreon member!
In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m sharing the full story of how my inner family came forward to me, one by one, and sharing personal experiences of re-casting and re-writing my past with my new, inner-loving family.
If you’re looking to identify with other adult children, the Adult Child podcast is for you. You can listen to Andrea Ashley’s podcast here!
Thank you for listening! If you enjoyed this episode, take a screenshot of the episode to post in your stories and tag me! And don’t forget to follow, rate and review the podcast and tell me your key takeaways!
Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/
CONNECT WITH BARB NANGLE:
Subscribe to “Friday Fragments” weekly newsletter
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Buy Barb a tea
Get a free chapter of my upcoming book: Roadside Recovery
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If you really want to have a well-lived life, you want to focus on what you want, not so much on what you don't want. Just like the archer must focus on the target rather than the trophy, we also must focus on the task ahead rather than the result, which may not even come to pass. This week’s episode 274 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast focuses on what you want by aiming for the target, not the trophy!
Support the show by becoming a Patreon member!
Through my recovery journey, I learned the importance of focusing on what you want rather than dwelling on what you don't want. Setting clear boundaries and prioritizing my needs and values has allowed me to form the healthy, genuine relationships I desire.
My hope is that you can apply this lesson of aiming for your goals, not external rewards, to enrich your own life.
Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.
Thank you for listening! If you enjoyed this episode, take a screenshot of the episode to post in your stories and tag me! And don’t forget to follow, rate and review the podcast and tell me your key takeaways!
Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/
CONNECT WITH BARB NANGLE:
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I was recently on a call with a newcomer in ACA (Adult Children of Alcoholics and Dysfunctional Families) and we were walking through The ACA Solution, a foundational document in the ACA program. This document is one of the many resources we have in this 12-step program that we use to reparent ourselves, heal, and recover from our trauma. Reading this document as a whole is incredibly powerful, but when we break it down line by line, we can internalize it and relate it to our own experiences on a deeper level. This week’s episode 273 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about the ACA Solution and how to overcome intergenerational family dysfunction!
Support the show by becoming a Patreon member!
In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m reading The ACA Solution, line by line, sharing my own perception and experience of what it means to me and my recovery journey.
Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.
Thank you for listening! If you enjoyed this episode, take a screenshot of the episode to post in your stories and tag me! And don’t forget to follow, rate and review the podcast and tell me your key takeaways!
Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
The ACA Solution
Ep. 10. My Tools of Recovery Part III: Focus On Me
Ep. 9 My Tools of Recovery Part II: Reaching Out
DENIAL EPISODES
Ep. 16 D-E-N-I-A-L (12 min)
ep. 23 Denial 2.0 (13 min)
ep 182 Denial 3.0 (23 min)
ep 191 - How I Came Out of Denial - My ACA Story (26 min)
ep 196 Denial 4.0 (24 min)
CONNECT WITH BARB NANGLE:
Subscribe to “Friday Fragments” weekly newsletter
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Buy Barb a tea
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In this digital world we’re living in, we’ve become so accustomed to a constant stream of notifications and content that it can feel overwhelming. But the good news is, like everything else, we can set boundaries around our digital exposure, protect our time and peace, and become more productive in the process. This week’s episode 272 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about how to take control by setting digital boundaries for peace and productivity!
Support the show by becoming a Patreon member!
In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m sharing some of my personal boundaries for the digital world and how you can implement some of these boundaries to stay focused and give yourself much needed digital breaks.
Some of the digital boundaries I go over in this episode include:
Turning the ringer on my phone off during my personal time. Limiting the number of push notifications I allow. Only following accounts on social media that I care about, deleting or blocking accounts I don’t want to see.Using a digital calendar to time block and effectively manage my time.Quit using my phone in the car. Being intentional about the things I post on social media. Muting work notifications outside of working hours.Using the Pomodoro Technique to focus on one task at a time and give myself breaks. Staying off screens while eating.
Knowing what matters to you is important because when you know what matters to you, you can set boundaries that uphold and support those things.Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.
Thank you for listening! If you enjoyed this episode, take a screenshot of the episode to post in your stories and tag me! And don’t forget to follow, rate and review the podcast and tell me your key takeaways!
Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
263. Approaching Conflict Resolution with Confidence with Melanie [Coaching Series Part 3]
Get a free chapter of my upcoming book: Roadside Recovery
CONNECT WITH BARB NANGLE:
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I notice a lot of people questioning what “normal” looks like. But it doesn’t matter what normal is for other people. What matters is what works for YOU and what fuels your energy instead of drains it. This week’s episode 271 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about how to embrace what fuels you in recovery!
Support the show by becoming a Patreon member!
Some of the talking points I go over in this episode include:
Prioritize the activities and people that energize you, regardless of what is “normal” for others.Use self-affirmations to meet your own needs and build trust in your self-approval rather than seeking approval externally. Focus inward through self-care to avoid codependency and self-depletion.
By simply being born, you deserve happiness, joy, fulfillment, affirmation, love, connection, and healing. You deserve to be here and you don’t have to do anything or change anything to be worthy of these things.Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.
Thank you for listening! If you enjoyed this episode, take a screenshot of the episode to post in your stories and tag me! And don’t forget to follow, rate and review the podcast and tell me your key takeaways!
Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Listen to Alesia Galati’s Podcasts
Ep 131: Let Go of Your Expectations of Others and Meet Your Own Needs
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For those of us who are co-dependent, people-pleasers, rescuers, fixers, savers, etc. it can feel extremely difficult to ask for help. But the truth is, we can’t do everything alone. Ken Dunn realized this quickly when he stepped out of his comfort zone and sought healing through meditation, adventure, and ACA. This week’s episode 270 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about becoming willing to ask for help!
Support the show by becoming a Patreon member!
In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, my guest Ken Dunn shares his journey of recovery and the transformative power of asking for help throughout his recovery journey.
Some of the talking points Ken and I go over in this episode include:
How getting out of his comfort zone and hiking the Appalachian Trail forced Ken into a position to ask for help. The role of mindfulness, meditation, and outdoor activities in Ken’s recovery journey. Having the willingness to work on yourself and giving yourself compassion along the way are crucial elements to healing. Entrepreneurship and recovery intersect when it comes to having resilience and the mindset to be successful.Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.
Thank you for listening! If you enjoyed this episode, take a screenshot of the episode to post in your stories and tag me! And don’t forget to follow, rate and review the podcast and tell me your key takeaways!
Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/
CONNECT WITH KEN DUNN:
Expedition Recovery
Instagram
Expedition Recovery- LinkedIn
Ken Dunn- LinkedIn
Facebook
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If you feel like your whole life is one big dumpster fire, you may also believe it is because of circumstances out of your control. While this may be partially true, there are plenty of things that are still within your control that you have the power to change and that is what I hope to share with you today. On this week’s episode 269 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m sharing 11 things you can use to put the fire out if your life is a dumpster fire.
Support the show by becoming a Patreon member!
In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m sharing some of the tools, tips, and mindset shifts I use when coaching my clients so they can live a more happy, joyous, and free life.
The 11 tips I cover in this episode include:
Accept things as they are, even when they don’t turn out how you want.Set boundaries. Turn things over to a higher power.Admit when you’re wrong and say “I don’t know” when you don’t know something.Don’t isolate, socialize.Stop judging yourself and others.Let go of unrealistic expectations.Get out of victim mentality.Pause, breathe, ground yourself, and let your nervous system calm down.Reach out for help.Focus on the one thing you can control: YOU.Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Ep 2: Acceptance
Ep 118: How to Untie the Bundle of Negativity and Self-Judgment So You Can Have Peace and Ease
Ep 8: My Tools of Recovery Part I: Pausing
Ep 10: My Tools of Recovery Part III: Focus On Me
Article: How to Get Over Your Fear of Being Judged
Ep 31: Overcoming Unrealistic Expectations
Ep 77: Getting Rid of Expectations After the Fact
Ep #3 Victim Mentality
Ep #106 How to Overcome Victim Mentality Even If You've Been Victimized
For more related episodes on unrealistic expectations and overcoming victim mentality, head to https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/CONNECT WITH BARB NANGLE:
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When you have a lifelong, ingrained pattern of people-pleasing behavior, it can be extremely difficult to undo, especially when it is a behavior we believe is keeping us safe. But I am living proof that it can be undone and it all starts with awareness. This week’s episode 268 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about how to find freedom from people-pleasing habits!
Support the show by becoming a Patreon member!
In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m sharing an update on another breakthrough I had on my reparenting journey lately, where people-pleasing stems from, and actionable steps you can take right now to let go of your unhealthy people-pleasing habits.
Some of the talking points I go over in this episode include:
People-pleasing often stems from a desire to gain the approval of others, not a true desire to be helpful.Why many of us who grew up in a dysfunctional environment develop people-pleasing tendencies as a survival mechanism. Actionable steps you can take to change your people-pleasing ways and make purposeful choices for what YOU want.Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.
Thank you for listening! If you enjoyed this episode, take a screenshot of the episode to post in your stories and tag me! And don’t forget to follow, rate and review the podcast and tell me your key takeaways!
Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Ep 148: How to Stop Being Attached to Outcomes - You Don’t Get to Have Your Curiosity Satisfied
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I didn’t understand until I got into recovery that all of my attempts to connect with other people were in fact, me chasing them. I didn’t realize that in both my romantic relationships and friendships I was putting way more work into maintaining the relationship than they were. True connection means each person has a balanced commitment and emotional investment in the relationship, rather than one person doing everything. This week’s episode 267 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about how to stop chasing and start connecting!
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In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m sharing what it looks like when you are chasing someone vs. when you are connecting with them and actionable steps you can take right now to start focusing on the healthy, balanced relationships in your life and letting go of the ones with unbalanced effort and investment.
Some of the talking points I go over in this episode include:
Chasing does not equal a high-quality relationship, connection does.Connection requires a balanced amount of energy & commitment to a relationship from each person.Starting to connect with people involves spending more time with the people you already have an equal connection with and stop reaching out to those you don’t. As a bonus, what a conversation with someone might look like to address an unbalanced effort.Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.
Thank you for listening! If you enjoyed this episode, take a screenshot of the episode to post in your stories and tag me! And don’t forget to follow, rate and review the podcast and tell me your key takeaways!
Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/
Sign up for the Self Love Sprint, a 30-day private coaching offer! You’ll receive three 30-minute private coaching bi-weekly calls on Zoom and Embrace Your Essence: A Holistic Guide to Self-Love and Empowerment so you can:
Create consistent self-care ritualsLearn to give yourself the praise you crave from othersDeeply internalize your Rights as a Beloved Child of GodKeep the focus on yourself rather than being focused on othersReally get to know yourselfIf you become a private coaching client after this sprint, you’ll get an $800 discount on my 12-week Private Coaching Program!
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Learning that I had a victim mentality and coming out of it was - hands down - the biggest mindset shift from my recovery. For that reason, this has been a huge topic of conversation on the podcast and something I will continue talking about as things come up to help others do the same. This week’s episode 266 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about how to stop victimizing yourself and reclaim your power!
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In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m sharing how those of us who live in a victim mentality can unconsciously victimize or re-victimize ourselves and actionable steps you can take right now to reclaim your power back and shift out of this mindset.
Some of the talking points I go over in this episode include:
Victim mentality doesn’t mean you’re weak or bad, it's a way of thinking and thus, something you have the power to change.The insidious nature of victim mentality and how it is internalized through thoughts and actions. Action steps you can use to focus on the present moment and overcome victim mentality.When you start to see that you are living in victim mentality, you can start to see your choice of coming out of it.
Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.
Thank you for listening! If you enjoyed this episode, take a screenshot of the episode to post in your stories and tag me! And don’t forget to follow, rate and review the podcast and tell me your key takeaways!
Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/
GETTING OUT OF VICTIM MENTALITY EPISODES
Ep #3 Victim Mentality (8 min)
Ep #106 How to Overcome Victim Mentality Even If You've Been Victimized (15 min)
Ep # 126 How Understanding Your Part in Things Brings You Out of Victim Mentality (15 min)
Ep. #152 How to Stop Taking Things Personally and Come Out of Victim Mentality (14 min)
Ep. #172 Seven Steps to Coming Out of Victim Mentality (21 min)
Ep #176 What Is the Dreaded Drama Triangle and How to Get Out of It (19 min)
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Most of us have never been taught to manage our feelings, making this one of the most difficult parts of recovery. When we have been accustomed to pushing our feelings aside, we lose the ability to recognize our feelings or generate our own feelings, and therefore, never get to a place of feeling things on purpose. This week’s episode 265 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about how to embrace emotional sovereignty- taking ownership of your feelings, not others’ feelings.
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In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m sharing the importance of taking ownership of your own feelings and how not to feel responsible for the feelings of others.
Some of the talking points I go over in this episode include:
You don’t have to wait for external triggers to feel something, you instead have the ability to generate your own feelings through your thoughts.Why those of us in recovery often avoid our own feelings and take responsibility for the feelings of others.Recognizing when you’re feeling others’ feelings vs. your own.Your own perspective determines how you feel about what others say or do, not the person’s actions themselves.It all starts with awareness. Awareness that you are responsible for your feelings and other people are responsible for their feelings.
Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.
Thank you for listening! If you enjoyed this episode, take a screenshot of the episode to post in your stories and tag me! And don’t forget to follow, rate and review the podcast and tell me your key takeaways!
Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
My other episodes on feelings:
Ep. 25 Act As If
Ep. 59 Making Things Mean Things That They Don’t
Ep. 76. Reducing Emotional pain
Ep. 141 You're Responsible TO Your Feelings Not FOR Your Feelings
Ep. 156 Info, Not Ammo
Ep. 163 Feelings Aren't Facts - But They're Still Real and They Matter
Ep. 199 Four Ways to Manage Your Difficult Feelings When Setting Boundaries
David Bayer’s podcast “A Changed Mind”
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I had an experience recently that I now refer to as “the pit of doom.” In reflection, I realized that the tools I have gained from recovery have allowed me to recover from this experience in a matter of weeks, whereas, before recovery, this would have weighed on me for years. This week’s episode 264 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast is about the 10 self-care strategies I used to escape the pit of doom!
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In this episode of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I’m sharing the series of things that disrupted my nervous system and brought me into this “pit of doom” and how my tools of recovery have helped me drastically decrease the time it takes to work through something difficult.
The 10 self-care strategies I cover in this episode include:
Nap, rest & relaxMeditateSound bathsNature videosSocial contactEat healthy, nutritious foodReach out for supportHave funSlow downExercise consistentlyBe sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.
Thank you for listening! If you enjoyed this episode, take a screenshot of the episode to post in your stories and tag me! And don’t forget to follow, rate and review the podcast and tell me your key takeaways!
Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/
LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Example of nature video with soothing scenery and music
Example of sound healing audio on YouTube
6 Pillars of Health for Lifestyle Medicine
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Living with roommates can be challenging, especially when people aren’t pulling their weight with housework. For those of us with a history of people-pleasing and co-dependency, it can be even more difficult to undo the behaviors we have allowed for so long and set boundaries around our peace. On episode 263 of the Fragmented to Whole Podcast, I help Melanie, another coaching client with the tools she needs to approach conflict resolution in her home with confidence!
Support the show by becoming a Patreon member!
Some of the things Melanie and I work through in this episode include:
Visualizing a physical force field, shield, or boundary around yourself to protect your rationality when entering into difficult conversations. Being honest about your feelings while acknowledging your role in creating household dynamics is important. Your boundaries mean nothing if you are not willing to enforce them with consequences. Using the practice of bookending a difficult conversation to check in with someone and re-affirm that you’re doing what’s right for your well-being.If you haven’t already, go back and listen to part 1 and part 2 of my live coaching series, and let me know what you think! & if you would like to volunteer for a live coaching session in the future, send me a message and let me know.
Be sure to tune in to all the episodes to receive tons of practical tips on living a more whole life and to hear even more about the points outlined above.
Thank you for listening! If you enjoyed this episode, take a screenshot of the episode to post in your stories and tag me! And don’t forget to follow, rate and review the podcast and tell me your key takeaways!
Learn more about Fragmented to Whole at https://higherpowercc.com/podcast/
CONNECT WITH BARB NANGLE:
Subscribe to “Friday Fragments” weekly newsletter
Free boundaries resources
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Patreon
Work with Barb!
Buy Barb a tea
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