Episódios
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Friday Night Live 7 June 2024
In this episode of Friday Night Live, we discuss retirement savings, health maintenance, and societal changes. We delve into the importance of investing in health, sexuality in relationships, and challenges in mixed-culture marriages. We conclude with reflections on parental authority and ethical communication. Tune in for insights on health, relationships, and personal growth.
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Hi Stef, I just want to say, despite listening to you for close to a decade now, I have only recently started to feel comfortable with the idea that other people’s negative emotions do not necessarily (and in most cases) have nothing to do with me or my actions, including my parents! Logically I have known this for a while thanks to you, but it only recently feels like I am beginning to feel it and believe it. I actually found humor (after initially feeling some guilt) about a random angry person I came across this morning. Well I think the humor came from my own realization of the absurdity of feeling guilt or anger because of someone else’s actions or emotional state, who doesn’t know me and has nothing to do with me. My parents sort of fit this category actually.
For my question - When you encounter scenarios like this,I.e. random angry person, someone calls you rude over a simple misunderstanding, how is that jolt of guilt or pain or shame halted or ‘sandboxed’ so it can be evaluated? (or is there not even this ‘jolt’?) I think there is something fundamental I am missing about this. Thanks a bunch, Stef!
What are the steps I could do to become more self expressed as opposed to self erased , I've defooed already .
A bit like the "30 year old virgin " caller , I spend a lot of my time in my head carefully weighing things up , a mixture of self censorship and appeasement .
Note that : When I defooed , at the time it was more of a knee jerk reaction as opposed to anything based on reason and evidence and proper philosophical principles and virtues , later on as I listened to you (big thank you ) I had more language to describe what I instinctively experienced with the Foo.
I think the real question is : how do I move from a mode of bomb disarming / hyper vigilance to a mode of cool relaxed /creative expression?
Hey Stefan! I've got a small group of local moms unfamiliar with your work but who are earnest about improving their parenting and being the best moms they can be. I mentioned your Peaceful Parenting book, and they're definitely interested. Could I share it with them in order to start a PP book club? I would, of course, encourage them to donate if they find your work valuable.
Thank you for clarity regarding the components to a proper apology~
Since starting your journey of RTR & self-knowledge, would you say you have fewer occurances where you need to apologize, more occurrences, or about the same? 🧮🤔
Does decreasing frequency of occurances where we need to apologize (not for the same transgression -- concerning genuine apologies) help indicate progress in self-knowledge, or indicate we may be flying close to the sun of vanity? 🪽🌞
Hi Stef, how do you identify the line between what would be considered ‘Banter’ or jokes and when it could be considered closer to verbal abuse or designed to cause hurt.
I find lad culture nauseating but I do have some exposure to it in a golf group I am part of. A recent comment from a friend from that group really struck a nerve . I don’t want to be over sensitive but the comment whilst a joke had an undertone that seemed aimed to do just that.
I know this is also important to know when you make a joke yourself and don’t want to hurt other people .
Thanks in advance for any information.
Stef, I’d like to hear your thoughts on the intellectual discipline it takes to maintain healthy skepticism without devolving into unhealthy pessimism.
I’m sure you’ve touched on this before, but I’ve only recently “discovered” you and while I’m going through your older stuff, I skew towards listening to your most recent content
Context: I had my kids late (first one at 40-I’m mid 50s now) and while I want them to have healthy skepticism, I don’t want to embitter them with the worldview my difficult life has led me to.
In short, I want them to be skeptical but still have the capability to experience “Joie de vivre” without making them misanthropes
I’m sure I could had worded this better, but I hope you get what I’m driving at even if I haven’t captured it with sufficient language
I love my kids. I want them to avoid bad people and decisions but still retain the capacity to enjoy the company of good people and consider their futures optimistically
Best regards and keep up the good work!
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Also get the Truth About the French Revolution, the interactive multi-lingual philosophy AI trained on thousands of hours of my material, private livestreams, premium call in shows, the 22 Part History of Philosophers series and much more!
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Stefan Molyneux joins Ryan McCormick in a deep dive on peaceful parenting, exploring the power dynamics and moral philosophy often overlooked in parent-child relationships. Discussing the shift from physical to verbal abuse, they touch on societal impacts and insufficiencies in positive role models. Stefan challenges beliefs on discipline and addresses the importance of self-reflection for parents to nurture empathy in children. The conversation outlines the pillars of peaceful parenting and emphasizes the transmission of ethical values amidst societal influences. Stefan advocates for peaceful parenting as a solution to societal dysfunctions, critiquing reliance on violence in child-rearing, and underscores the need for secular ethics to uphold universal moral standards. Calling for a shift towards peaceful parenting for societal transformation, Stefan highlights its potential to cultivate harmonious communities grounded in peace and voluntary interactions.
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NOW AVAILABLE FOR SUBSCRIBERS: MY NEW BOOK 'PEACEFUL PARENTING' - AND THE INTERACTIVE PEACEFUL PARENTING AI AND AUDIOBOOK!
Also get the Truth About the French Revolution, the interactive multi-lingual philosophy AI trained on thousands of hours of my material, private livestreams, premium call in shows, the 22 Part History of Philosophers series and much more!
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Wednesday Night Live 5 June 2024
In this episode of Wednesday Night Live, we discuss challenges with bureaucracy, societal norms, and ethics like assisted suicide. We emphasize the importance of listener support and authenticity in engagements. Encouraging donation support, we foster genuine connections and exploration of diverse topics.
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NOW AVAILABLE FOR SUBSCRIBERS: MY NEW BOOK 'PEACEFUL PARENTING' - AND THE INTERACTIVE PEACEFUL PARENTING AI AND AUDIOBOOK!
Also get the Truth About the French Revolution, the interactive multi-lingual philosophy AI trained on thousands of hours of my material, private livestreams, premium call in shows, the 22 Part History of Philosophers series and much more!
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In this episode, the speaker explores the concept of downfall in public life, reflecting on their own experiences and society's fascination with others' failures. They emphasize the importance of taking risks and striving for greatness while maintaining integrity. Encouraging listeners to prioritize values over external success, the speaker advocates for making a lasting impact and embracing personal potential. Ultimately, they urge the audience to focus on meaningful contributions and maximize their influence despite external validation.
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NOW AVAILABLE FOR SUBSCRIBERS: MY NEW BOOK 'PEACEFUL PARENTING' - AND THE INTERACTIVE PEACEFUL PARENTING AI AND AUDIOBOOK!
Also get the Truth About the French Revolution, the interactive multi-lingual philosophy AI trained on thousands of hours of my material, private livestreams, premium call in shows, the 22 Part History of Philosophers series and much more!
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"My lack of integrity has left me feeling as though I am an empty vessel. I have a strong aversion to sharing my honest thoughts with both family and friends. Whether these thoughts are benign or whether they are 'harsh truths', I feel anxious in admitting to either.
"I am reluctant to express discontent with the members of my family. In the past I have gone so far as to admit to my mother that I feel no love for her, and yet even today I still express my love to her through what I feel are merely platitudes. Specifically in this case, it feels as though expressing the truth of my feelings toward her has had no bearing on how our relationship has changed over time.
"I have drifted from your show in the past when I felt as though I was finding success in relationships or was developing a more honest sense of self. However, in the wake of the premature ending of a recent relationship, it's becoming more difficult to avoid confronting my patterns of behavior.
"I do struggle with vanity, which has been reinforced by an unearned sense of pride. I procrastinate exploring the opportunities that I want to explore. I believe this to be the case for two reasons: 1. From what I have experienced through trying new things, it is humbling to learn that true value comes from investment and hard work, and 2. Regardless of whatever I am pursuing, I cannot escape myself.
"The humility required to be authentic is very intimidating to me. Even now, I am craving easy answers as to how I can begin resolving my issues.
"I would very much appreciate your help in providing me with the tools necessary to take measured, achievable steps in identifying the roots of my vanity, pride, and the anxieties that scare me away from confronting them.
"I would like to provide some biographical information below:
"I am a man in my late twenties. My only sexual experience has come from a one night stand.
"I do have a small group of friends, but only feel comfortable having significant conversations with one of them.
"I am a child of divorce, and I have several siblings. Some of my siblings come from my birth mother and father, and the others come from my father's second marriage. My father is now in the process of divorcing his second wife.
"My childhood was spent in bouts of both repressed and overt anger. When I did act out, either by throwing a tantrum or destroying my own property or the property of others, steps were never taken afterwards to address the roots of my anger.
"I have seen two different talk therapists off and on over the past few years and have felt as though I have yet to get much use out of the sessions.
"I am writing to you because in the wake of my most recent relationship, I am only now recognizing how dangerously dishonest it is to not listen to my conscience and express myself in accordance with it. Furthermore, I have caught a glimpse of how continuing this behavior while in a relationship with another person is going to undermine any capacity to ever build trust.
"I am now in the process of converting to Catholicism after spending some time searching for a religious community. I grew up Protestant, but Catholic Mass is a form of worship with which I feel as though I have a legitimate connection. My goal with following a religion and participating in a community is to look beyond myself and consider the needs of others. I would like to begin the process of looking beyond myself, where I do feel the roots of my problems lie. As a person with little integrity, I have yet to fully appreciate the irony that I am joining a religion wherein one of its Sacraments is Reconciliation through the act of Confession. I admittedly recognize that the pattern of ignoring my own issues while wrapping myself in the flag of 'helping others' is present here as well.
"I want to stop using people while claiming ignorance of the consequences of my behavior in light of my 'best intentions'. Please help provide me with the tools to stop lying to myself and those in my life."
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"Hello, all. I'd like to get a discussion going regarding that parallels the release of the PP book. I have been itching with anticipation for its completion since there was first talk of it years ago. I am overly thrilled that it is finally here! I've been raving about it to all of my mama friends. I am a donor and therefore have had access to the book since Stefan started sharing it last October. Yet, I started listening to it and stopped somewhere around chapter four. I wasn't angry or overwhelmed with grief or otherwise emotionally incapacitated. I stopped, thinking it was so juicy, so good, that I needed to take my time and savor it. I didn't want to rush my consumption in greed letting the information spill over, lost, deep within my memory. This seems reasonable in my mind. I wanted to slow down and absorb the book instead of letting it pass through me like an entertaining novel. But I STOPPED at chapter four - just stopped -without realizing I'd done it until today, months after. So, when it dawned on me, I realized that I have a history of doing this, going back decades. I get very excited about a particular book. I elevate it to the highest value, begin reading it, and inexplicably stop, leaving it unfinished with every intention of finishing it later. I have read dozens, maybe hundreds, of inconsequential books cover to cover, but there are four that were "so important" that I never finished them. I want to get to the bottom of it. Does anyone share this enigmatic habit? I'd appreciate any feedback you guys can provide. Maybe someone has already walked this path and has some insight. Please and thank you."
"Hi Stef, my 2 sons came home highly disturbed yesterday. They go to the local park everyday which contains a pond and a river in which they enjoy meeting with their friends, fishing, catching turtles and frogs, and playing sports etc. one of the kids within my son’s friend group was using a live frog as a writing utensil. Using it to draw on a wall. As well as throwing it against the concrete, kicking it etc. He was horrified at the extreme level of abuse and when he questioned this kid his response was who cares it’s just a frog. I suggested to him to stay away from him as he seems to be highly troubled. But my son didn’t know how to handle it as this kid also falls within “the group” and staying away from him would also mean isolating himself from the rest of the kids. Any suggestions as to how to how to handle the social dynamics of this situation?"
"Stef the following question is more about me providing you feedback to a question you asked in your response to my question about how an elephant man would find a virtuous wife. You asked why I was asking the question if I wasn’t an elephant man and such circumstances didn’t apply to me or anyone I know of personally. I think I can understand why you would ask me that question Stef when your philosophy generally deals with less abstract or hypothetical issues, indeed you have arguably taken on a role as a therapist to many people who ask you questions which I give you tremendous praise for addressing. Whilst elephant men are certainly extremely rare, my question wasn’t necessarily abstract, the elephant man was just the extreme end of the spectrum to illustrate a point. You can gradually dial the curtains back a bit and reveal many men who may not be elephant men but certainly are below average looking in looks and socio-economic status, you are aware I think Stef there is some sort of crisis going on whatever the cause, where young generations are having less relationships than ever. That said I think you largely answered my question Stef in that you said it is not a violation of UPB to date someone who is low value such as a prostitute if the prostitute is the best a man can get and sadly for the elephant man and even many other people who are not elephant men, a prostitute who is rejected by all the high value successful men may be the only option available to many of these men."
"Hi Stef, I recall you talking in the past about people getting emotionally ‘stuck’ in a certain age. I am currently 28 but for most of my life have felt like a 12 year old boy. I had an unpublished conversation with you 9 months ago, and almost immediately moved out of my parents house, and have since bought my own car and gained a lot of relationship/sexual experience where I previously had none (none!!). Thank you by the way, you helped me realize I needed to start panicking and actually DOING SOMETHING. Point being is that I feel as though I’ve mentally aged a good bit, and now feel like a rebellious teenager, although still not enough of a true rebel to confront my parents, although we don’t speak. Still have not started therapy or journaling. I’ve realized this sounds more like a question I should be able to ask my father, 10 years ago. I guess my question is, is this normal? And what you’re referring to with ‘mental age’? What would be the next steps to keep ‘aging’? I guess journaling and therapy. This also got me thinking about rites of passage which used to be commonplace in society but are now totally absent or delayed. I normally don’t ask questions but this has been on my mind lately, hopefully something interesting you can extract. - saying that makes me think my feelings are false in some way and I still feel like that scared 12 year old. My parents never changed how they talked to me from that age on essentially, never talked about sex never talked about anything of substance ever. That comment about rites of passage looks so out of place. I wonder why I said that."
"Hello Stefan. Im writing a short novel in where a young up an coming politician gets a real devils bargain. My idea with the story is that I want him, the politician, to face evil. Im thinking something like three envoys which represents different facets or aspects of the darkness in man. Do you have any suggestions or ideas of what these different facets could be? Little short this month but promise to donate at this months end. Thank you for everything."
"Please explain how you define “philosophy” and “philosophical conversation”? . I’m new here —but much of the conversation especially with others seems psychological/historical. Unless I misunderstood."
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In this episode, we engage in a deep conversation with callers sharing personal stories of relationship challenges, betrayal, and self-discovery. Through heartfelt accounts of infidelity, lack of boundaries, and family dynamics, we delve into the complexities of love, trust, and communication. Our dialogue highlights the importance of self-awareness, setting standards, and fostering healthy relationships built on mutual respect and understanding. We offer guidance on navigating difficult situations, emphasizing the significance of proactive resolution and open communication to cultivate lasting and fulfilling partnerships.
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NOW AVAILABLE FOR SUBSCRIBERS: MY NEW BOOK 'PEACEFUL PARENTING' - AND THE INTERACTIVE PEACEFUL PARENTING AI AND AUDIOBOOK!
Also get the Truth About the French Revolution, the interactive multi-lingual philosophy AI trained on thousands of hours of my material, private livestreams, premium call in shows, the 22 Part History of Philosophers series and much more!
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Join me in a conversation where we explore a caller's breakup with his long-distance girlfriend, delving into his childhood background and parental relationships to understand his romantic struggles. We discuss the impact of incomplete maternal bonding on relationship fulfillment and emphasize the importance of secure attachments. Analyzing past relationship dynamics, we highlight the influence of attachment patterns and traumas on partner choices. We underscore the significance of healthy parental relationships in fostering secure attachments and navigate through challenges in the caller's long-distance relationship, emphasizing the essence of genuine connection and mutual commitment for relational success. In post-breakup reflections, we discuss self-respect, Catholicism, and moral integrity's role in nurturing authentic connections, promoting self-awareness and accountability in relationships.
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Also get the Truth About the French Revolution, the interactive multi-lingual philosophy AI trained on thousands of hours of my material, private livestreams, premium call in shows, the 22 Part History of Philosophers series and much more!
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Sunday Morning Live 2 June 2024
Join us for a deep dive into philosophy in this episode, where we navigate through topics ranging from history to language and truthfulness in religious teachings. Our dialogue explores the essence of language, the importance of evidence in belief formation, and the implications of societal constructs on personal paths. We critique blind self-assurance, discuss confidence dynamics, and challenge conventional norms in pursuit of authenticity and fulfillment. Delve into the exploration of truth, self-belief, societal influences, and the significance of evidence over unwarranted self-assurance for genuine success. Examine societal expectations, dating dynamics, and the balance between work and family life, emphasizing self-awareness, diligence, and continuous personal growth. Join us on this journey of self-discovery and societal introspection, as we advocate for pushing boundaries and contributing positively to humanity.
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NOW AVAILABLE FOR SUBSCRIBERS: MY NEW BOOK 'PEACEFUL PARENTING' - AND THE INTERACTIVE PEACEFUL PARENTING AI AND AUDIOBOOK!
Also get the Truth About the French Revolution, the interactive multi-lingual philosophy AI trained on thousands of hours of my material, private livestreams, premium call in shows, the 22 Part History of Philosophers series and much more!
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Friday Night Live 31 May 2024
Join me in this episode for updates on the Peaceful Parenting AI audiobook and e-books, limited time offers. We critique Baby Reindeer and an ape-themed film, share heartfelt stories, and tackle listener questions on regret and consciousness. Delve into deep discussions on grief and pair bonding, explore proving consciousness, and discuss the fine line between reality and dreams. Engage with diverse topics like AI, dreams, and friendship while inviting donations and offering a glimpse into future episodes.
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NOW AVAILABLE FOR SUBSCRIBERS: MY NEW BOOK 'PEACEFUL PARENTING' - AND THE INTERACTIVE PEACEFUL PARENTING AI AND AUDIOBOOK!
Also get the Truth About the French Revolution, the interactive multi-lingual philosophy AI trained on thousands of hours of my material, private livestreams, premium call in shows, the 22 Part History of Philosophers series and much more!
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Wednesday Night Live 29 May 2024
In this episode, we delve into the nuanced distinction between healthy fear and anxiety, particularly in the context of betrayal by supposed allies. We explore how childhood experiences can shape our responses to such emotions, emphasizing the importance of self-reflection and values alignment. Additionally, we critique the role of the state as a breeding ground for incompetence and exploitation rather than productivity, advocating for a reevaluation of societal structures. Personal anecdotes and reflections on caregiving, entrepreneurship, and philosophical musings are shared, underscoring the value of cherishing moments with loved ones and navigating life's adversities with resilience.
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NOW AVAILABLE FOR SUBSCRIBERS: MY NEW BOOK 'PEACEFUL PARENTING' - AND THE INTERACTIVE PEACEFUL PARENTING AI AND AUDIOBOOK!
Also get the Truth About the French Revolution, the interactive multi-lingual philosophy AI trained on thousands of hours of my material, private livestreams, premium call in shows, the 22 Part History of Philosophers series and much more!
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I explore the historical development of language, suggesting its creation was to foster loyalty to abstract ideals and replace physical strength. I use language to uncover truths and address its misuse for manipulation. Emphasizing clear communication and moral principles, I criticize convoluted philosophies and advocate for accessible discourse. Language's role in inciting conflicts and power dynamics is discussed, highlighting its potential for control. I promote philosophical transparency and empowerment through language to combat manipulation and encourage critical thinking for societal benefit. Promoting truth and clarity in philosophical discourse is key to enriching dialogue and fostering ethical behavior.
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NOW AVAILABLE FOR SUBSCRIBERS: MY NEW BOOK 'PEACEFUL PARENTING' - AND THE INTERACTIVE PEACEFUL PARENTING AI AND AUDIOBOOK!
Also get the Truth About the French Revolution, the interactive multi-lingual philosophy AI trained on thousands of hours of my material, private livestreams, premium call in shows, the 22 Part History of Philosophers series and much more!
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In this episode, Stefan passionately discusses the opioid crisis, shedding light on its history and impact while emphasizing the importance of physical health and exercise in preventing health issues. The conversation delves into the correlation between age and weight, the economic challenges of living the American dream, and the significance of societal accountability. Stefan and the guest further explore incentivizing preventive care in healthcare to reduce costs and improve overall well-being, advocating for a shift towards rewarding healthy practices and emphasizing prevention. The episode concludes with reflections on the influence of health insurance, societal changes, and the importance of engaging with audiences to foster growth and meaningful discussions.
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Diving deep into the complexities of family relationships and the impacts of military service on personal well-being, we explore a caller's struggles with self-conflict stemming from his father's military prioritization over family. Unpacking motivations and challenging sacrifices, we illuminate the intricate dynamics of fear, respect, and emotional challenges within military culture. Transitioning to discussions on happiness and reciprocity, we navigate the importance of selflessness in nurturing meaningful connections within familial and romantic contexts. Emphasizing the transformative power of generosity and reciprocity, we advocate for fostering genuine connections through mutual care and consideration, culminating in reflections on personal growth and positive change within relationships.
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In this episode, we discuss a caller's history of domestic violence, addiction, and trauma. She opens up about her past relationship struggles, highlighting the importance of growth and healthy boundaries. We explore her challenges in recognizing red flags in relationships and the impact of unresolved trauma on forming connections. Advice is given on realistic expectations in partnerships and prioritizing self-care. The caller reflects on her pattern of choosing unsuitable partners and seeking validation, emphasizing the importance of setting boundaries for personal well-being.
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Join me in this episode as we explore the debate between science and religion, focusing on how science intersects with Christianity through examples like climate change and the COVID vaccine. We aim to present factual information without delving into controversy, urging listeners to consider empirical evidence objectively.
We discuss discrepancies in past climate change predictions and current realities, as well as challenges surrounding the COVID vaccine, emphasizing the importance of empirical truth over hypotheses. By highlighting the process of testing hypotheses in science and adapting theories based on new data, we underscore the critical interaction between science and empirical reality.
Our goal is to prompt critical thinking on how empirical evidence shapes our worldview, encouraging reflection on the evolving landscape of scientific inquiry and the pursuit of verifiable truths amidst the convergence of facts and hypotheses.
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In this conversation, we explore a caller's journey through challenges with communication, relationships, and personal struggles, including experiences with alcoholism, academic labels, bullying, and aggression. The caller reflects on past relationships, faith journey, loss of a sibling, and the impact of grief, guilt, and family dynamics on their beliefs and coping mechanisms. Discussion also touches on health risks, mourning processes, substance abuse, self-improvement, and the importance of empathy and support in navigating personal growth and positive change.
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NOW AVAILABLE FOR SUBSCRIBERS: MY NEW BOOK 'PEACEFUL PARENTING' - AND THE INTERACTIVE PEACEFUL PARENTING AI AND AUDIOBOOK!
Also get the Truth About the French Revolution, the interactive multi-lingual philosophy AI trained on thousands of hours of my material, private livestreams, premium call in shows, the 22 Part History of Philosophers series and much more!
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Friday Night Live 24 May 2024
Join me in this thought-provoking episode where I engage with the audience on topics ranging from relationships to philosophical ideologies. Drawing from personal experiences and academic insights, I discuss the importance of resilience, honesty, and rational decision-making in both personal and societal contexts. Delving deep into the significance of truth, morality, and dialogue, I advocate for facing uncomfortable truths and fostering empathy to create a more ethical and understanding society. Tune in for a blend of introspection, societal analysis, and lively anecdotes that inspire critical thinking and positive action.
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NOW AVAILABLE FOR SUBSCRIBERS: MY NEW BOOK 'PEACEFUL PARENTING' - AND THE INTERACTIVE PEACEFUL PARENTING AI AND AUDIOBOOK!
Also get the Truth About the French Revolution, the interactive multi-lingual philosophy AI trained on thousands of hours of my material, private livestreams, premium call in shows, the 22 Part History of Philosophers series and much more!
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Join the PREMIUM philosophy community on the web for free!
NOW AVAILABLE FOR SUBSCRIBERS: MY NEW BOOK 'PEACEFUL PARENTING' - AND THE INTERACTIVE PEACEFUL PARENTING AI AND AUDIOBOOK!
Also get the Truth About the French Revolution, the interactive multi-lingual philosophy AI trained on thousands of hours of my material, private livestreams, premium call in shows, the 22 Part History of Philosophers series and much more!
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Stef the following question is a follow up question to a previous question I asked involving the elephant man. Now the question I am going to ask you Stef is an entirely seperate question but is in spirit a follow up as it deals with the central issue of principles I had raised previously in the elephant man questions. The reason I ask this new question is because the following very real scenario I will be referring to involves yourself Stef in a very recent interaction here on Freedomain Locals. On a very recent call in with a German guy you asked the German guy what’s the issue in regards to following principles. He said ‘It’s hard’. I was very interested in hearing what he was referring to when he said ‘it’s hard’. I think I know what he was referring to, I think he was referring to the fact that if you follow principles it will likely lead you nowhere in the modern world of women and relationships. Not to say I have a problem with the principles you advocate for Stef, but does following principles really lead to results in the modern world of dating & relationships? Let me give you evidence to back up my claim, evidence that you Stef I know are all too familiar with. Women as you are aware Stef are drawn to bad guys, jerks, even in some cases criminals. I don’t have to remind you Stef the most popular book of all time with women is ‘50 Shades of Grey’. A book about a brutal arrogant jerk who blindfolds women and smacks them on the ass with a belt and wooden spoon. Additionally there is an old saying Stef women love drama and ‘you can make a woman feel anything, just don’t make her feel nothing’. Now I get & fully understand the point of following principles that you advocate for Stef but in the face of all the evidence that suggests the average women isn’t really looking for a guy with virtue who follows principles I do think you have to deal with those very real facts. I’m not saying following principles is guaranteed to lead to failure, it’s possible this caller might find the unicorn who is not driven by drama and Mr. Grey bad boy energy, but on the balance of probabilities if he follows principles will he find this super rare woman? I don’t think those odds are good, again in the face of all the competing evidence I have just stated Stef I think that is a very reasonable assertion to make. What I am referring to is practicality Stef. Is it practical for this German caller to follow principles when a lot of the evidence suggests women aren’t searching for a man with virtuous principles, again on average, but as you said yourself Stef on your recent episode criticising long distance relationships ‘What makes you believe you would be the exception to the rule?’. Was it the practicality of following principles is what the caller was referring to when he said ‘it’s hard’. I think so, when he compared your advice to other advice, advice from dating coaches who say women like jerks and bad boys and guys that don’t care about them. Again Stef you can question the morals such advice giver gives out but in the face of all the competing evidence about ‘50 Shades of Grey’ and women continually dating jerks and in some cases even in more extreme cases criminals you can’t say such advice is not practical advice based on very common real world anecdotal evidence. I’m not contesting the value of the principles you preach Stef, I am questioning the practicality of applying those principles in the modern dating world. Just as I was not questioning whether dating a prostitute was generally a good idea or not in my elephant man example, I was questioning the ‘practicality’ of following principles in the given elephant man scenario. I am now contesting the practicality of following principles in the face of all the evidence that shows women are attracted to domineering jerks. I’m not necessarily advising this caller to not follow principles either, but I do think the caller at least needs to understand and acknowledge why it’s hard to follow principles - it’s very simple, in general women like a bit of drama and a guy with a bit of an edge. The caller seemed very logical, rational and very calm and whilst I respect these personality traits - I will be frank a lot of women find this type of logical personality boring, so there are the challenges I think men like the caller is facing, and I am again not instructing this caller to follow principles or not Stef, I am just addressing what I think he was referring to when he said ‘it’s hard’, and if that was what he was referring to then I think another call in with that caller would be appropriate to address these very relevant issues in a world that is gradually descending into a haze of immoral people having relationships and children whilst people with principles just stand back on the sidelines with their principles. Now Stef I leave you with a Youtube video of a streamer named Casey Zander because I think he gives advice very different from yours Stef, & you can contest the morality of his advice Stef but it would be interesting Stef if you can contest the practicality of this guy’s advice in the face of all the evidence that shows women like cocky arrogant pricks or at least a guy with an edge over a guy who follows principles and reason?
If you are not restricted by an NDA or similar:
Have any DROs reached out to offer you a position on their board of advisors; or, have you considered the endeavor yourself, maybe even as a philosophical Judge Judy show? 👨⚖️
I recently had a falling out with my older brother...he has been going through a really tough time as of late and I've been calling and checking in on hime everyday....but over the past month I may have been a little too pushy and have been asking questions to see if there was any more I could do...he's suffering from a deep depression and I have suggested he try to push through the pain and get on a schedule and change his habits in small increments....he hung up on me twice and then the last 2 conversations he rushed me quickly off the phone bc he doesn't care to hear anything more...so I stopped calling him....now a month has gone by...he has not.picked up the phone and neither have i....am I wrong for backing away? Or am I abandoning him when he's at his most vulnerable? I can't help but feel a strange sadness come.over me but also at the same time a sense of freedom....am I doing the right thing?
how can we best help you spread the message of Peaceful Parenting?
Hi Stef, do you have an opinion on lending people money? I have always been a saver, and maintained the mindset of self reliance. When life has thrown me a curveball, I have been able to manage financial eventualities on my own. Perhaps because of this, the perception has been that all is well with me, and I have no problems. Maybe this is why people have always reached out to me for help. I have to admit that I have had difficulty saying no, and of course most have payed me back, but there are the few times that I have been burned. Do you think in life, it should be our duty to help friends, family with need, or should I adopt a sterner policy, and if so could it be something that could come back to bite me, should I one day be in need?
Hi Stef, for the last 13 years I have been helping my Sister invest, from telling her what to invest in through to managing those investments in real time (through weekly market research) along side my investments as a full time investor.
In the process I have made her million’s and she is on the verge of generational wealth which has allowed both her and her husband to either retire or semi retire to focus on raising their child.
Over those 13 years I did not ask for anything in return, I wanted to help my Sister and I am aware of the dangers of stealth contracts where you expect something in return even though the other person is not aware of it and how that can build resentment.
Despite knowing this I am starting to feel a bit of resentment due to the duration I have been doing it and the amount of money I have made her, and I have had nothing in return for all what I have done.
Even at Christmas all I was given was a £30 pair of jogging trousers which I didn’t want.
Is it right to feel hurt by a lack of reciprocity even though I originally was happy to help her out without asking for anything in return? Or would this fall under a stealth contract which is wrong? - Mostrar mais
