Episódios
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Winners winners, turkey dinners!
Thanks to the absolute legends at SCRIVENER - https://www.literatureandlatte.com/
You can get 20% off a copy by using the code 'failing' until the end of 2024.
ORRRR
maybe... just maybe... you've already won a copy, and you don’t know it?
Well there's only one way to find out isn't there?
by listening to this episode....
So come on in and let's find out who's won the Failing Writers Podcast £500 Festive Flash Fiction Final!
Whoop whoop!
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Don't forget you can still get 20% off SCRIVENER using the code 'failing' until the new year - so do that first before you get side-tracked with all the less-important Christmas stuff.
OK. Done that? Great. Now listen to this lovely episode featuring the wonderful Amy Daughters talking about how hand written letters can help bring people together.
https://www.amydaughters.com/books
Next, find out how Jon & Tom got on with a bit of letter writing ...
and then for the sake of balance, lets see what happens when you write letters pretending to be a 104 year old woman, who has a pet hedgehog and lives with a horrible lady called Mrs Hale...
Because Robert Popper's been busy again...
Get The Elsie Drake Letters for your loved ones in time for Christmas here "or you will regret it":
https://www.hachette.co.uk/titles/robert-popper/the-elsie-drake-letters-aged-104/9781399817899/
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Estão a faltar episódios?
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Time to finish our letter to Bridget Phillipson, and once again thank the incredible teachers we spoke to, and the pupils for their fabulous creative writing.
And hey, thank yourself too! Whether you like it or not, you're now part of our powerful army of activists, who are going to help bring about a U-turn in reading and writing!
Let's start today - let's put away the smartphones - let's read more - let's volunteer as a paired-reader at a school. Let's big-up teachers - let's write something and share it with the world - let's write letters to the government until they change the way English is taught, and the way the arts are viewed in schools.
Thanks for listening, and if you want to know more about the stuff we've been discussing, or have any other suggestions about how we might give English in schools a boost - drop us a line!
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"Thank goodness for the Failing Writers."
A phrase you've no doubt overheard people say quite a lot over the years. At bus stops. Maybe in libraries? At the off licence?
No? Not even the off license?
Oh.
Anyway - not to worry - this week you're ALMOST CERTAIN to hear it, as Jon and Tom slip their pants on over their tights and become SAVIOURS OF THE SUBJECT OF ENGLISH IN SCHOOLS.
Yes, we're making it our mission to breathe new life into our favourite school subject and bring back the joy of reading and writing for the young folk of Britain!
How?
By writing a sternly worded letter of course! To Bridget Phillipson, Secretary of State for Education.
But first, we need to talk to some people who actually know what they're talking about. You know, to find out what the heck's going on with young people and reading and writing!
First up: Inspirational English Guru: (Yes. We're calling her a guru!) Leah Crawford.
Ooh... and don't you dare forget to enter our Festive Flash Fiction Competition in Association with Scrivener:
Get more details here:
https://www.failingwriterspodcast.com/episodes/episode/ad99e466/s4-ep-20-the-failing-writers-festive-flash-fiction-competition
Here's Leah's website:
https://leahcrawford.com
Bob Cox’s site - The home of Opening Doors:
https://searchingforexcellence.co.uk
The Opening Doors series:
https://www.crownhouse.co.uk/opening-doors
Let's Think in English:
https://www.letsthinkinenglish.org
Links to The English Association’s campaign to save English:
https://englishassociation.ac.uk/english-creates-a-campaign-for-english/
https://englishassociation.ac.uk/choose-english/
The Common English Forum Manifesto for English in schools:
https://commonenglishforum.org/a-manifesto-for-english/
The Just Imagine Centre championing excellent books in schools:
https://justimagine.co.uk/the-book-channel/
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If Tom & Jon wrote poems
‘spose it will be assumed
They won’t be as good as Henry’s
Normal service will be resumed.
In this episode, we meet up with Henry Normal: poet, writer of famous sit-coms, TV producer and poetry festival founder, and have a blummin’ lovely natter.
(After we did that - we watched him perform all his lovely poems, so effortlessly. So fluidly. So naturally.
And thus, inspired by his performance, we wondered how hard it would be to knock off a quick poem and perform it aloud.
“Bloobee blah blah bleeblee
Bloobloo bloobloo la!…”
Sort of like that.
Dead easy.
So we did.
The results were... profoundly... um...
...well... decide for yourself.)
Henry Normal’s insta:
https://www.instagram.com/henrynormalpoet/
Buy Henry’s books:
https://flapjackpress.co.uk/products/henry-normal
Henry’s tour dates:
https://www.ents24.com/uk/tour-dates/henry-normal
BIG UPS…
The bloke who wrote the short story that Jon loved:
https://www.aaroncourts.com/
A.B. Finlayson and his excellent book:
https://abfinlayson.com/rockzombie/
Genevieve Marenghi-Daly’s lovely website.
https://sharpewords.uk/
Cover photo: J. Preston. Available for weddings, bar mitzvahs and saucy stuff.
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Sorry? Did you just say you'd love to enter an almost free* festive flash fiction competition to win £500?
I thought you did!
Well as coincidence would have it, that is exactly what we've got going on in this very episode.
So step this way, my cheeky little word-purveyor, and cast your well oiled ears at our glorious 350 word Flash Fiction Competition.
That's it.... yep... cast them freely.... mmmm.... that's the ticket.
*I say 'almost free', cos it's only a pound to enter. And we only did that to keep the pesky AI enterers from entering.
So, well... that pretty much qualifies as free doesn't it?
Here are some links to stuff mentioned in the podcast:
Buy the Fuel Anthology Emily mentions, here: https://www.fuelflash.net
Find Smokelong Quarterly here: https://www.smokelong.com
And here is your failsafe
STEP BY STEP GUIDE TO ENTERING
THE FAILING WRITERS PODCAST
£500 FESTIVE FLASH FICTION COMPETITION:
1. Listen to Series 4, Episode 20 of The Failing Writers Podcast.
2. Jot down the special phrase you must include in your story.
3. Write your 350 word, festive flash, (including that phrase!) Ideally well before the deadline - midday, Friday 13th December!
4. When you’re super-happy with it and ready to go… log into your Paypal account https://www.paypal.com
5. Click on 'send and request'.
6. Under the send menu, type [email protected] into the box. It will suggest Tom Turner – click on that!
7. If ‘you send’ is set to USD, change to GBP, and send £1.00 (don’t forget that decimal point or you’ll send us £100!!! whoopieee)
8. ‘What’s this for?’ put something like “Comp entry”
9. Hit send.
10. Now go to your email and find the receipt you should’ve just been sent.
11. Click Forward, and attach your flash fiction entry to this new email.
12. Send that email (with Paypal receipt & flash piece) to [email protected]
You’re all done!
Can’t wait to see what you come up with!
For all of the details and terms and conditions and all that jazz - go here:
https://www.failingwriterspodcast.com/post/win-500-in-our-festive-flash-fiction-competition
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What is ergodic literature? Well, it's when a story becomes more than just something you read, and you become part of it.
But pretend you haven't read that, so that you can find out from listening to this wonderful episode. In which, we have a chat with "S" co-author Doug Dorst and You Say Which Way author Deb Potter, in our quest to get to the bottom of what ergodic fiction is and why it's so blummin' good. Enjoy!
Here's some links for things in the show and stuff...
https://dougdorst.com/
https://www.amazon.co.uk/S-Doug-Dorst/dp/0316201642
https://yousaywhichway.com/
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Unfortunates
https://www.penguin.co.uk/books/327088/house-of-leaves-by-danielewski-mark-z/9781529943993
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Masquerade_(book)
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Should you treat yourself to a writing retreat?
If you did it twice would you be re-treating yourself to a writing retreat?
If you tweeted about treating yourself to a writers retreat would you be tweeting your re-treat of retreating to a retreat?
And if you then re-tweeted your...
OK, I'll stop.
Tom & Jon not only answer the first of these pressing questions, but as they disappear into the wilderness (sort of) to sample a writers' retreat, they seek to answer the biggest question of all.
The one that's been haunting them for as long as they've been doing this podcast.
Can they actually knuckle down and write for 2 and a half days straight? No social media. No boxsets. No 'nipping to the pub for one' and then accidentally spending the entire afternoon there?
...
What?
Well I'm obviously not going to tell you am I?
Of course not.
What do you mean, I'm being a tease? That's what these bits of blurb are for! to tease you in.
Oh stop arguing and hit play.
Here's where we went:
https://writersretreatuk.co.uk/2023/01/our-own-venue-the-retreat-at-the-kings-arms/
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Are you querying? or nearly querying? Maybe you’re fearing querying? Or merely getting weary and a bit teary querying? Well let’s hear from three writers who’ve been down in those querying trenches for a while now.
Find out how they're approaching it, what agents' responses have been like and how they’re holding up under pressure.
Because when it comes to finding an agent, it’s more often than not, a long and painful process. No matter how talented a writer you are.
Byddi Lee:
Byddi’s website:
https://www.byddilee.com
Byddi's Books:
https://www.amazon.co.uk/stores/Byddi-Lee/author/B00OICWYUU?ref=sr_ntt_srch_lnk_3&qid=1726051761&sr=1-3&isDramIntegrated=true&shoppingPortalEnabled=true
Özgür Uyanık:
Short stories MEN ALONE
https://www.parthianbooks.com/products/men-alone-short-stories?_pos=1&_sid=53c734e1d&_ss=r
Short story from the collection, BANTER:
https://nation.cymru/culture/short-story-banter/
Novel CONCEPTION:
https://www.fairlightbooks.co.uk/conception/
THREADS
https://www.threads.net/@liberatedsleepless
SUBSTACK
https://ozguruyanik.substack.com
Mari Stewart:
Mari’s website:
https://mari-stewart.com
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... What? Did 2 weeks just fly by since the last episode? No flippin' way.
Time, I think, we had a chat about time. The fact that there's never enough of it. Especially for writing.
Why is that?
Well Oliver Burkeman might just have some answers.
Prepare to face the subject of time and limitation face-on.
Get ready to completely re-think how we view those precious hours, minutes and seconds. And ask... 'what would happen if we spent less of it worrying about the fact it's running out, and more of it just... being in it.'
Or even becoming time itself?
Might this shift in thinking actually help us stop procrastinating? and start spending more of our time doing the things that actually matter?
Hopefully, yes.
But what does actually matter?
You might have to answer that one yourself.
Regardless, whatever you do, you should definitely spend the next forty five minutes wasting your time listening to Oliver Burkeman.
Get a load of Oliver's brilliant 400 Weeks here:
https://www.oliverburkeman.com/fourthousandweeks
Get free incredible anti-procrastinatory tips here:
https://www.oliverburkeman.com/posts
And get Oliver's sparkly, life changing new book here:
https://www.oliverburkeman.com/meditationsformortals
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Well, that’s the summer hiatus done with - and we're back with an episode which asks the question, "how do you know if your writing is good enough?"
In an attempt to answer that question, we’re going to be looking at a couple of Tom’s flash fiction stories and asking if, why, and how, one of them is slightly less rubbish than the other. Both stories were entered into the same competition, but only one of them got published. Can Dave guess which one is which? Can YOU guess which one is which? Well, to answer either of those questions, you're gonna have to have a listen, aren't you!
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Do you have what it takes to quit your day job and follow your dreams to become a full time author?
Well, there's only one way to find out...and that's to listen to our interview with J C Duncan!
Hear how he bravely decided to give himself a year to become a professional writer and, even bravelier, decided to tell everyone about it!
Plus home made knives, Vikings and our usual top quality chat!
Find out more about our most excellent guest (and check out that sword!) HERE: www.jcduncan.co.uk.
Buy his Vikingly books here: https://www.amazon.co.uk/stores/J-C-Duncan/author/B08WCYR1DR
And check out his #oneyeartopro threads here:
https://x.com/JCDuncanauthor/status/1707002271010079150
https://twitter.com/JCDuncanauthor/status/1708465357424365671
https://twitter.com/JCDuncanauthor/status/1719670719628358012
https://twitter.com/JCDuncanauthor/status/1732823188453650477
https://twitter.com/JCDuncanauthor/status/1741821890270798104
https://twitter.com/JCDuncanauthor/status/1753131464768532959
https://x.com/JCDuncanauthor/status/1755575800626073768
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A rose by any other name would still smell as sweet...but would he have written that line if he wasn't called Shakespeare?
This week Jon, Tom and Dave (or possibly Rod, Jane and Freddy) look into pseudonyms, nom-de-plumes, pen names...and basically just being someone else for a bit.
Does your name affect your chances of success? Does it even have an impact on how you write?
Join us to find out as the Failing Writers try to become the not-so-failing writers....for at least one chapter.
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A change is in the air here at Failing HQ. A scent on the wind, a signal that the new dawn will herald the arrival of long overdue success.
This week, not only do Tom and Jon have a lovely chat with acclaimed author and current Richard and Judy Book Club pick Mike Gayle...but Jon also discusses his submissions to some actual writing competitions. AND Tom talks a bit more about the book he's actually published!
Oh, and Dave's there too.
Mike's latest novel:
A Song of Me and You: a heartfelt and romantic novel of first love and second chances, picked for the Richard & Judy Book Club
https://amzn.eu/d/2DqUyK9
Or see more at www.mikegayle.co.uk
"Under A Blood Red Sun" from Aaron Brooks in our WIP up a storm feature.
TOM'S BOOK - If you can't be bothered to go to Amazon and put in "Two Hour Sales Bible" then here's a link to it - GO AND BUY IT!
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If we were really clever, we'd have written the show notes for this week's episode in the form of a cryptic crossword clue in honour of our guest, Samuel Burr.
We spoke to him about his debut novel "The Fellowship of Puzzle Makers", his frankly unbelievable journey to getting published and even had a chat about all things cryptic.
But, unfortunately, we're not really clever...so we didn't.
Which makes Tom's incredible publishing news even more puzzling!
Find Sam's already bestselling novel here
Or... if you're feeling adventurous, join an exclusive club and be one of the few to buy a copy of Tom's hilarious satire on the world of sales and salespeople...
PAPERBACK - KINDLE - AUDIO BOOK
Here's the link to Writers HQ - Write a Novel Month
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The average age of our guests this week is 64. Nothing too amazing about that you might say… until you find out the first of our two guests is in her mid-twenties! This week we ask, “Is there a best age to write?”
Plus we enjoy a WIP from Geoffrey G N Harrison.
And here’s a load of links…
Check out Aline’s YouTube here!
Here's Aline's Toktok
Here's Babette's new book and her website: https://www.babettehughesbooks.com
And you can read more of Geoff's story "Divided" here!
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Would you like a pun? Well, that's handy because this week we've been punning for gold and ended up with a bucket load.
Director, writer and stand up comedian Darren Walsh chats to us about his career, the art of a good pun and whether AI will ever be funnier than him.
Plus Jon comes up with what is almost certainly not an entirely new form of joke!
Find out more about Darren here...
https://darrenwalsh.co.uk
Here's Darren doing his award winning joke (and some others)
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Have you ever been to Scarfolk? It's a strange, yet hauntingly familiar place. Join us as we take a bus trip into the mind of the man who dreamt it all up, Richard Littler.
Plus we take a look at another listener's bit o' writing they've kindly sent in to share with the class. This week we try and make Madelyn Postman cry...
Find out more about Richard here...
https://scarfolk.blogspot.com
and here...
https://www.richardlittler.com/
And thanks [email protected] for letting us use those bangin' music tracks in Data Double! https://www.totim.audio/music
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If comedy writing is your thing, we've got a real treat for you. This week we talk to the super talented and rather prolific Robert Popper. From how he broke into the industry via Steve Coogan and The Comic Strip to his smash hit sitcom Friday Night Dinner. We also chat about Robin Cooper, The Timewaster Letters, South Park, Look Around You, and plenty more besides.
Robert’s Wikipedia
Plus, in our regular 'Dare To Share' feature (where we have a look at what our listeners have been writing, read it out, then discuss it) we look at an excerpt from J. Aaron Courts' 'Hot Box'.
See more from Aaron here:
https://www.instagram.com/aaron.courts/
https://aaroncourts.substack.comHosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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The great Carl Reiner once said “Improvisation is just writing in front of an audience”.
So we figured if we could brush up on our improv skills it's bound to make us better writers... right?
This week improv extraordinaire, and official Comedy Store Player, Ruth Bratt talks to us about her life, her craft and the eating habits of her cat... before putting us to the test with our own improvised play. What could possibly go wrong?
Go and see Ruth with the legendary Comedy Store Players here:
https://comedystoreplayers.com
Get your ticket for Showstopper! The Improvised Musical here:
https://showstopperthemusical.comHosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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