Episódios

  • Happy LUBEor Day You Patriotic SLUTS 💦💦💦😫 From the twisted mind of THOT TOPICS comes an all-new episode full of juicy, scrumptious goodness for ya nerve. EAT IT UP MAMA!

    We're back to business for the first time in a while so we do a little bit of girly catchup. Are we doing more than flirting with sobriety at this point? Who's gonna make the first move? Us? Or that tasty tasty MOCKTAIL? We recap Nick's bachelor party and ponder what it means to be a party girl in heart, but not in liver...

    Then, we move on to the subject on everyone's lips: FAT GAY EIGHT YEAR OLDS. Who's got em? Who wants em? Is it okay to call them disgusting and shameful pigs? We investigate the gay guy selfie trend that has sent Twitter into a little spazout.

    Then, we issue a formal prognosis on the Katy Perry situation following her response to The Dr. Luke Question. What's REALLY going on behind the scenes at Katy Perry headquarters? What would she have to do to turn this ship around? MUCH is revealed-- including our breasts, of course.

    Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC, and the official pod Insta @th0tstarsxo.

    GET 20% OFF ANY PURCHASE OR 48% OFF ANY SUBSCRIPTION OF THEE ONLY PRODUCTIVITY SHOT APPROVED BY THOT TOPICS, MAGIC MIND! GO TO MAGICMIND.COM/THOTPOD20 AND USE THE CODE 'THOTPOD20' FOR YOUR XXXCLUSIVE DISCOUNT.

  • Calling all birdwatchers! Are you watchin' these birds?!?!?

    This week, we join forces in the Plus Size Creator's Autonomous Zone against the powers that be: hater ass faggots in the Patreon exit surveys. Once that demon is purged from our spirit, it's down to business as usual.

    We take Raggedy Chappell to task over her complaints on TikTok about fans asking her for pictures. Is she cooked, or does she have a chance? Why is TikTok incompatible with pop stardom? Is privacy cringe? Or are gay guys the cringe ones? ALL will be revealed in the fullness of time...

    But that's not all: we take a look at the recent study of the least attractive male hobbies, according to women. From vidya to trolling online, we psychoanalyze all parties to uncover the troof-- and nothing but the troof.

    Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC, and the official pod Insta @th0tstarsxo. For more low-effort content riddled with technical issues, throw the girls a freakin' bone on Patreon.

    GET INTO YR FLOW STATE WITH MAGIC MIND! ✨🧠 GET 20% OFF ANY SINGLE ORDER, OR 48% OFF A SUBSCRIPTION AT MAGICMIND.COM/THOTPOD20 USING PROMO CODE THOTPOD20. XO

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  • We're back in the lounge to resolve more critical issues in the Thot Topics Jewniverse! We receive emergency transmissions from our beloved homosexual and female (and STRAIGHT MALE) listeners on matters of life, love, and the pursuit of pussyliciousness.

    What's on the menu, you ask? We discuss how to stave off BPD attachment tendencies, how to respectfully tell someone you no longer want to have sex with them, and whether it's worth it to live with your parents to get your coins up.

    Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC, and the official pod Insta @th0tstarsxo. Get on our freakin' party line on Patreon.

  • **PATRONS ONLY**

    Subscribe now at patreon.com/thottopics.

    Long time no talk, loca! What's it been giving girlfriend?! This week, we've opened the gilded gates of the Thot Topics Golfing Greens and Garden for the unwashed masses to speak directly to the girls. That's right bitch: for the first time since December, it's time for EVERYONE to get in on the girl's chat with a special hotline episode!

    And ohhhh boy, did our precious gay and gay-adjacent listeners deliver! We discuss everything under the sun, from being obsessed with foreskin to your in-laws making you an offer you can't refuse-- it's a wild ride from start to finish!

    But that's not all-- we also have a private girls conference on body-ody-ody image and being a lawyer for the hawk.

    Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC, and the official pod Insta @th0tstarsxo. Call us beep us if you wanna reach us on Patreon.

  • Bruh. BRUHHHHH. I don't know what the fuck is in the water this week but like 20 minutes of this episode somehow deleted itself. Should I kill myself? MAYBE!!!

    Anyway, MOST of an episode is here and I'm praying things will be back to normal this week lmfao. Here's what we got into: KAMALA 2024, the pressures of talking to teens when you feel like a teen inside, if it's a big deal that Gen Z and Gen Alpha can't read, and MORE! I'd keep writing but we recorded this so long ago I honestly don't remember... LOVE YOU

    Get 46% off a subscription to Magic Mind Mental Performance SHOTZ at magicmind.com/thotpod20. Or, get 20% off any purchase on their site with the code THOTPOD20. God bless America, and god bless MAGIC MIND!

    Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC, and the official pod Insta @th0tstarsxo. Throw a bitch a fucking bone on Patreon. We need the spiritual uplift.

  • You've stumbled into the Katy Perry Apologists Anonymous meeting. Please find a seat and be prepared to share your story. Refreshments have been provided and are available on the far wall. May we see your peacock?

    This week is a really special one. Just honestly what the fuck guys. First, we unpack our fourth of july weekend for all its worth. These are NOT our cookies officer! Then, we review the brand new Katy Perry single "Woman's World," and wonder if Katy Perry knew that women are allowed to have jobs. We issue a formal prognosis for the 143 era and it's not looking great.

    Last but certainly not least, we discuss Matt Bomer's beautiful family and whether it's heteronormative to have children-- whatever the HELL that means. We break new ground on a WELL-worn topic and there's much to enjoy.

    Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC, and the official pod Insta @th0tstarsxo. They really CAN all be California Gurls on Patreon.

  • Na na na na.... na na naaa na... hey, hey, hey... gay priiiiiiiide

    Strap in (or on!) for the unique and incomparable stylings of THOT TOPICS! This week, we're in rare form to discuss all manner of gay guy bullshit happening on the timeline-- we're really playing the hits on this one. Thank you to all of the brain damaged middle aged homos who contributed their valuable thoughts!

    The table is piled high with crucial documents of pride month behavior. First, we discuss the 17 year old insisting that he does not want attention online and being called a pedophile for saying so. Then, we talk about whether or not it's worth it to spend $300 a month on an Equinox membership and what gay guys REALLY mean when they say "networking." Of course, we had to discuss the guy whose boyfriend didn't let him top for 2 and a half years because he wasn't "daddy enough." You guys were really acting up LOL!!

    Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC, and the official pod Insta @th0tstarsxo. You know you were hella wrong for what you did on Patreon.

    **

    WE ARE BACK IN BEESWAX WITH MAGIC MIND! For 20% off your first order of their mental performance shots at magicmind.com/thotpod20 or use the code THOTPOD20 at checkout. (Or for 48% off your first subscription order.) Godspeed!

  • Sometimes, the people who laugh the most, cry inside the hardest... they also have the biggest jiggliest boobs. 😥 RT if you cried

    Welcome to the Thot Topics podcast official Pride Month kickoff where we ask the question on everybody's lips (both sets!): Are YOU proud to be gay? We try our hand at "questions to ask an LGBT panelist", but before we do that, we air a few grievances around GETTING OLD and ALCOHOL AS A SOCIAL LUBRICANT. We're sipping from the fountain of youth this week y'all-- we advise you to throw on a two-piece and soak it up!

    We were both really tired and had a piece of shit week but hopefully you find some sisterhood hidden in this profound and meaningful Girls Chat...

    Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC, and the official pod Insta @th0tstarsxo.

  • Has anyone even TOLD you about our new weekly bonus show for paying sisters? ON SECOND THOT is our sexy little aftershow where put our hair in a pony, get cozy, and let the real freak shit fly. Each week, we select our definitive SLAYS OF THE DAY, FREAKS OF THE WEEK, and last but not least, discuss how God tested us over the last seven days.

    You too can enjoy these vital conversations on Patreon at patreon.com/thottopics for only 4 dollars a month-- PLUS the standard premium-only episode every other week. Here's just a little taste...

    Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC, and the official pod Insta @th0tstarsxo.

  • Welcome to the Metropolitan Museum of Ass, Hair, and Titties. We'll kindly accept your donations up front, to support the continued growth of this vital field.

    We're BACK! And back in the New York GROOVE no less as we take on the many looks of the 2024 MET GALA, the theme of which was something about flowers or something? Hard to remember now girl. If you'd like to do a READ-ALONG with us, please enjoy your listening experience paired with photos from the good homosexuals at Vogue.

    Naturally, that's NOT all to the tasty recipe that gives this episode it's robust flavor. We also talk about SWEAT and DEODORANT, the music of RAVEN-SYMONE, CAR CRASHES, LOSS PREVENTION, and THE JOYS OF TANNING. Please enjoy-- and god BLESS!

    Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC, and the official pod Insta @th0tstarsxo. If you have not already joined us on Patreon for our brand-new weekly bonus show, ON SECOND THOT, come and get you a piece before it's TOO LATE!

  • Yeah I don't know what the fuck was in the giggle water this week but this is a particularly cracked out episode lmfao

    WELCUM 2 THE JUNGLE! The girls return to discuss matters of utmost importance with international implications. As we pregame for the Nicki Minaj concert and spread our passports wet 'n' wide for entry to Gag City, we pay ten dollars to get in the ball and take a closer look at what the world is up to...

    First, we discuss the rates of LGBTness among Gen Z high schoolers, and the New York Times (I think? LOL) report that it's mostly girls saying that they are bisexual. Then, we discuss the Normal Middle Class Guy TikTok and unpack what makes straight men so drawn to the grindset.

    Last but CERTAINLY not least, we unpack the imminent opening of JOHNSON'S the male strip bar set to replace Berlin in Boystown, and the fuming gogo boys involved. Pretty messy!

    Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC, and the official pod Insta @th0tstarsxo. We munch trade for dollars on Patreon. Don't forget to sign up for access to our new weekly bonus show for patronz!!

  • **PATRONS ONLY**

    Welcome to the Thot Topics Brewhouse, where children and dogs alike will be killed immediately upon entry. Can we offer you a Michelob Ultra draft?

    The girls return to the booth for a vital tribunal on all the issues facing a young woman in the world today: SSRIs, feline dental health, immune system support, desktop gaming, marijuana legislation, HIV that turns into AIDS, and so much more.

    But naturally that's not all: we also discuss the photo that sent all kinds of totally normal people into a frenzy this week, in which dogs are allowed and human children are banned. What's our stance on all of that? We attempt to form a cogent thought.

    We also discuss Lanachella, and whether or not its okay to be happy that "skinny Lana is back." As Ozempic users and believers, our two cents are worth a million cents.

    And paying sisters: STAY TUNED in a few days for the debut of ON SECOND THOT, our xxxclusive bonus show that will now be a weekly staple in your current membership <3

    Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC, and the official pod Insta @th0tstarsxo. Help fund Apple's oral health on Patreon.

  • The jury finds you in contempt of CUNT! Now it's time to SERVE!

    Welcome back to central booking at Thot Topics Regional Penitentiary. All fines will be processed to the window on your left, and visitation will be found to your right. Oh, you're here for a conjugal visit? Right this way, ma'am...

    This week, the girls convene on several matters of utmost importance-- sucking in your stomach, food safety, atomic habits, Joker 2, and so much more. We also do a quarter-year checkin on our most-streamed music: what's hot on the charts in our apartments and on TouchTunes? Much appreciation abounds for the arts.

    Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC, and the official pod Insta @th0tstarsxo. Bail us out on Patreon.

  • You better worm girl!

    We're BACK for a lovely special springtime episode. (But really, aren't they ALL special?) This is a girls chat of VITAL importance: we really put our thinking boobs on for this one!

    We discuss everything on God's Green, from LESBIANS to DUNE 2 to what may be the FINAL DAYS OF THE TIKTOK TOP 50. Do you love the way we work it? HEY LADIESSS!!!

    Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC, and the official pod Insta @th0tstarsxo. Back it up and dump it on Patreon.

  • **PATRONS ONLY** Four goddamn American dollars get you access to full-length bonus episodes AND... new surprises coming soon :)

    Hold onto your whorses because it's time for another riveting episode of THOT TOPICS! We're back after losing or breaking literally every single piece of recording equipment we owned and are ready to begin a new chapter of excellence in inbreastigative reporting.

    This week, the girls discuss the Nickelodeon sex pest documentary QUIET ON SET and pick out a bra to throw on stage at The Wiggles On Ice. Then, they unpack Beyonce's new rootin'-tootin' country girl persona and forthcumming album COWBOY CARTER. Did black people invent country? Honest question we really don't know.

    And last but not least, we talk about whether drag kings should be cast on Drag Race-- per the sage words of Naysha Lopez, the greatest showman.

    Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC, and the official pod Insta @th0tstarsxo. Fight for what's right on Patreon.

  • The block is hot-- and we're about to turn it into the Summer of 69! (If you catch our drift...) Welcome back to the Thot Topics Studios where we are prepared to begin a new chapter of our happy little lives. We begin with a lengthy girly little chitchat about the simple joys of our young sprightly bouncy lives. We also reluctantly check in on the current season of Drag Race and the state of whale sex. Later on, we enter a ruthless battle of wits by answering famous questions from ARE YOU SMARTER THAN A FIFTH GRADER. From biology to math, we break new barriers in teen intellect and capture it live on air. Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC, and the official pod Insta @th0tstarsxo. Don't be a bummer on Patreon.

  • **PATRONS ONLY** Subscribe to the Patreon at patreon.com/thottopics.

    Wooohoo... YEEEEEEEEEEhoo!!!!!

    It's a leap year and you know what that means: there's one more day 'til the rent is due, pookie! Now, PUMP THE BEAT! First, we do a little bit of girly chitchat-- the weather was beautiful and the vibes were ERRATIC to say the least, so there was much to be discussed. What masculine traits are displayed in gay guys? Is there such thing as an Indian elephant? All will be revealed in the fullness of time.

    Then, the main event: we comb through a master list of classic pop album covers and rank them on a scale from "galactic slay" (decided by the gay guy who made the TierMaker list) and GUTTER BOOTS! We share rare insights on Kesha, Carly Rae Jepsen, Cardelia B, and many more-- it's a classic Thot Topics romp.

    Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC, and the official pod Insta @th0tstarsxo. Feel yummy head to toe on Patreon.

  • Hold on to your cloaca, cuz it's gonna be a bumpy ride!! We convene to discuss the state of The Bimbo: is her time finally over? Have the powers of the bimbo fallen into the wrong hands, exploited for her comically large breasts for TikTok cred? WHO can be trusted with the pure heart of the Bimbo... and how many must die... Naturally that's NOT all: we "review" Kim Petras's new uhh project SLUT POP MIAMI; and get to the bottom of the Ayesha Erotica situation. We really speak our minds about COUNTRY MUSIC and "WHO IS REALLY COUNTRY." And? We discuss the reproductive behaviors of birds... Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC, and the official pod Isnta @th0tstarsxo. Smoke our cubana on Patreon.

  • In the criminal justice system, sexually based offenses are considered especially slaynous. In Boystown Chicago, the medicated detectives who investigate these vicious felonies are members of an elite squad known as Thot Topics. These are their stories. We're back in business-- silly us, we were standing on it the whole time! We use our journalistic skills to unpack the Nicki Minaj vs Megan Thee Stallion situation. Using the latest technological advancements in forensic science, we get to the bottom of the truth honey. Not only that, but we're here to discuss the Ice Spice Conundrum, tax season, gay jealousy, and many more crowd pleasers. Love you! 🧠 GET 75% OFF A MAGIC MIND SUBSCRIPTION WITH OUR XXXCLUSIVE CODE! Head to magicmind.com/JanThotTopics and use the code TTOPICS20. Open that mind wide baby! 🧠 ⭐️💋 GET 20% OFF OF YOUR FIRST PURCHASE WITH JOYMODE SEXUAL PERFORMANCE BOOSTERS! HIT usejoymode.com/thottopics and use code THOT20. ⭐️💋 Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC, and bail us out on Patreon.

  • **FULL EPISODE FOR PATRONS ONLY** PATREON.COM/THOTTOPICS Polizia! Help! I've been Margot ROBBED! We'd like to thank God, the Academy, and most importantly Dr. Pepper for their unwavering support in the making of this podcast. We simply couldn't have done it without you. We know we're supposed to wrap it up, but we also need to express our gratitude to this week's topics: BLUE LIVES, AAVE, BARBIE, FEMINISM, THE POD, THE BUGS, DOORDASH, THE 96TH ACADEMY AWARDS AND ITS DECORATED NOMINEES, THE TIKTOK TOP 50, and more that we're forgetting to mention but believe us when we say our journey would not be the same without you. You know who you are. Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC, and the official pod Insta @th0tstarsxo. Give us a standing ovaysh on Patreon.