Episódios
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A compliment can be a real can of worms. Even a well intentioned compliment can set off a chain of emotional and psychological outcomes for a person, and this week the hosts sort out the reasons why that may be. Citing a well researched bbc.com article called “Why it’s so hard for some people to accept compliments” (Christine Ro, April 2024), Jeremie and Bryde discuss the impact of cultural and behavioural factors on the subject and have come up with some best and worst practices when it comes to compliments. Listen with some reassurance that if you’re “bad at taking compliments”, you should probably just not worry about it.
For a deeper look, check out the article here.
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Puberty is a horrendous time when you don’t know what the fuck is happening to your body, mind, and worldview. Remember the tortuous days of sitting out of gym class because there was a pad in your underwear, or getting a nickname because of your body odour?
Demetra Malios is an entrepreneur in tech and is the CEO and founder of Pu-berry, a platform offering interactive, gamified, and medically verified education to help young people navigate puberty with confidence. Demi shares the stats and incredible outcome measures of success with this platform, and the kids, schools, and parents who interact with it. She also explains the allure of adorable fruit emojis incentivizing youth to learn what they need to know to better understand themselves and everyone around them. This is knowledge for life!
Check it out at puberry.org!
Sign-up for Puberry's web app here!
Puberry Giveaway!
Open until Dec 18th, 2024.
Raising Empowering Young Girls Giveaway (Puberry x Penguin Random House Collaboration)
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Everyone's horny and sexual function is for every body, AND there are some unique considerations for folks living with disability when it comes to personal pleasure. This week, Anna breaks down a literary review that discusses the historical context for studying sex and disability, as well as the positive aspects and particular challenges to sex positivity. A mind-opening conversation is had about how our misconceptions of what disability feels and looks like may be limiting how we see the sexual identity of others, and even perpetuate it unconsciously. The conversation also covers Jeremie's new nightmare, the Homunculus, as well as a heartwarming anecdote about a real best friend facilitating a sexy session for his buddy. Listen to get smarter.
Study:
https://compass.onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/abs/10.1111/soc4.12508?casa_token=_kvPPo72SpkAAAAA%3A-QXXwUOCX-Ks1YWZ6nzWN2Clkl5o5r36poLp_sm7BNz_pIBsF3FqcyiUE4DZ7ypTVSnTLhN5RtPf-Go
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William A Moore is making (wet) dreams come true by providing penis enhancements that blow the competitors out of the water. Lips, cheeks, butts, boobs, of course there’s also filler for a penis you might want to plump up. Moore chats with the hosts about PhalloFill, a non-invasive procedure using hyaluronic acid to help someone reach their girth goal. They chat about the contraindications (of which there are few), the implications of body dysmorphia as a red flag for treatment, and the importance of choosing safe, reversible options. There are physical, mental, and relational benefits such a procedure can offer and if you love someone who would love to be more of a shower, share this episode. How cozy does it sound to curl up in bed spooning a newly girthy penis?
For more: https://phallofill.com/
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Disney should really produce an adult, kink-themed experience for all the now grownups who first became aware of their fantasies after seeing them depicted by cartoon characters in beloved childhood movies. How did “Peter Pan” influence a young, religious cult community escapee to become her fully expressed self? Read all about it! Ariel Anderssen joins the hosts this week to discuss the life trajectory she covers in her memoir, “Playing To Lose: How a Jehovah’s Witness Became a Submissive BDSM Model”. She describes the loneliness of trying to come to terms with her desires in the age before the internet could show her that she wasn’t alone. When Ariel finally connected with right medium for her passions, she blossomed into a creator of a wide variety of content that elevates how we can all think about sex-work and self expression, and she shares some of her favourite sub activities with the hosts, as well as safety advice for those looking to get into. modelling.
For more of this “knotty” sub, order her memoir and check out all of her socials here:
Twitter: https://x.com/ArielAnderssen
Youtube: @ArielsTwilightYears
Website: https://www.arielanderssenauthor.com/
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If Lady Di (Princess of Wales) was still living, she could probably dominate only fans, right? Enter Lauren Spencer, a 50-something, successful adult content creator and ambassador for TurnOnVideo.com, adored for her soft, teasing manner, and of course, her uncanny resemblance to the OG Spencer MILF. Ms. Spencer shares a little about her journey as a naughty phone operator in the 90s and the no-brainer decision to go all in on camera when the pandemic shut her business in 2020. The hosts are “gobsmacked” when Lauren shares the most obscene scene that she has ever encountered on camera (trigger warning, poop), and are titillated by the zero fucks she gives about being a recognized adult content creator.
More Lauren:
TurnOnVideo.com
Instagram: @laurenspencer_uk
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What if closeness was overwhelming to your senses? For neurodivergent individuals, sensory avoidant or sensory seeking behaviours can cause havoc in relationships if not properly understood. The good news is that communication, no surprise, can make a world of difference. This week the hosts sit down with certified somatic sex coach and trauma specialist, Nuria Reed, and the conversation takes some twists and turns, including some thoughts on spiritual frameworks for healing, a chaotic kundalini awakening, and the impact of aging and shifting values on personal identity. This is a unique conversation for and from unique minds, and a reminder that self acceptance is key to healing, and that healing happens in relationship.
Find more of Nuria's offerings at www.nuriareed.com or on Instagram @nuriareed
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Sex education rests in the hands of the media and serves the objectives of capitalism - sounds healthy and pleasurable, right? So not sexy. To undo this, let’s go back to school on the subject of childhood development. Dr. Tina Schermer Sellers is chatting with the podcast hosts once again, revisiting and diving deeper into the implications of abstinence only sex education and purity culture, and how we can make the future happier and healthier for the next generation by liberating ourselves from sexual shame. Dr. Tina gives a breakdown of the capacity for understanding verbal and non verbal cues about sexuality throughout the developmental stages of childhood, and the impact those cues have to our brains, bodies, and relationships. The hosts have questions about the significance of the language we use to name body parts, the link between purity culture and violence against women, and like, wtf is the madonna/whore complex? Finally, Dr. Tina shares her latest work with psychedelic assisted therapy and some inspiration for what that therapeutic approach can offer to those of us wanting to liberate ourselves perhaps a little more efficiently!
This is a great follow up to the podcast's first conversation with Dr. Tina back in December 2022. Listen to that episode for some great information about the origins of abstinence only sex-ed and how it has physical and psychological outcomes on a person akin to the experience of childhood sexual trauma.
Learn More:
InannaRising.org
tinaschermersellers.com
Instagram: @DrTinaShameless
@inanna_rising_pat
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Sometimes the biggest challenges in a relationship come from within, and sometimes they come from how the world sees us. This week, Anna explores a study on intimacy and sexuality from the perspective of partners of transgender and non-binary individuals. She delves into the complexities of gender dysphoria during intimacy, the importance of consent and microaffirmations, and the many strategies couples use to navigate body dysphoria, such as regendering body parts or using prosthetics. Whether it's avoiding sex, or finding new ways to connect, this discussion highlights the importance of open communication in love and relationships.
Link to study
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This one's for the penis'. Jeremie reviews the most recent product the podcast has received from a guest, made especially for the penis, inspired by real, watchable blow jobs. Truly the gift that will keep on giving. Take a listen to August's episode "Blowjobs Unlimited: The Mechanical Blowjob" to hear more about how Autoblow came to be and where you can find your very own VacuGlide, the toy that Jeremie is keeping for himself. Bryde tells Jeremie a bit about phalloplasty (penis surgery), the techniques involved in creating a penis (which includes, but is not limited to growing one on your arm for 4 months), and the outcomes for each kind of penis in terms of sensitivity, rigidity, and ability to urinate. If you have a penis or if you want one, maybe it's time to ask yourself whether you would sacrifice one of your own digits for it. Not an arm and a leg, but still pretty steep. See 1st source for photos. NSFW.
Sources:
https://www.cureus.com/articles/292183-phallus-reconstruction-using-the-third-finger-transplant-method-a-case-report#!/
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/12449578/
https://www.mayoclinic.org/tests-procedures/penile-implants/about/pac-20384916
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK563292/
https://www.hopkinsmedicine.org/health/treatment-tests-and-therapies/phalloplasty-for-gender-affirmation
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Window shopping for romance may define this era of dating. Apps have taken over the public spaces where we used to make social connections, and swiping takes seconds, where sifting through a pile of profiles at olympic speed gets you to the bottom of an empty barrel pretty quickly. Today, sex researcher Anna talks the hosts through a paper on the impact of choice overload when it comes to all those fish in the sea (in the barrel?). Turns out that the more fish, the less satisfaction. Have a listen to this week’s Carnal Knowledge for interesting findings about loneliness, satisfaction, and rejection mindset when it comes to our modern way of courting. Then put your phone down and maybe try chatting up that cutie in the coffee shop like the good ol days.
Link to Study
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Do you talk to your doc about your sex life? Dr. Evelin Dacker is a family practitioner and sexual health educator. Her experience over 30 years in practice has guided her towards being a leader among physicians, educating other doctors on how and why they should be talking to their patients about sex. The hosts chat with Evelin about the medical impact of pleasure, the healing nature of authenticity, and the result of a culture that glorifies suffering. Dr. Dacker breaks down her STARS framework for thinking and talking about safety, turn ons, boundaries, relationship expectations, and sexual health status. Another one for the toolkit, the STARS method is a great perspective for sorting out our own thoughts and feelings about sex, and finding the words to share that with others.
Find more on the STARS framework keep up with Dr. Evelin Dacker here:
https://www.maketimeforthetalk.com/
On instagram:
@maketimeforthetalk
@sexmeddoc
Evelindacker.com
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History has been hard on our favourite hands-on hobby. Wanking has not been thoroughly explored in science research despite its significance in human sexuality from beginning to end of life, but Dr. Eric Sprankle has compiled his findings in a book all about our favourite pastime, “DIY: The Wonderfully Weird History and Science of Masturbation”. In this episode, Dr. Sprankle shares some curious and strange tales from the history of masturbation including how the act has been viewed by different religions over time, the stories that have been made up and passed down to discourage self pleasure, and the rise of semen retention as a belief system. The hosts chat with Dr. Sprankle about the interpretation of art, social media and psychology, Satan’s semen, the criminalization of sex toys, and the clashing of our mythologies. Rest assured that no demons are waiting to mix your seed with Satan’s reproductive fluids.
You can find the book at https://www.drsprankle.com/ and definitely follow Eric on Instagram and Twitter
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When it comes to pelvic floor health, it’s not just about Kegels and crossed legs. Dr. Sara Reardon, a.k.a. "The Vagina Whisperer," demystifies the often-overlooked world of pelvic floor therapy, revealing that it’s not just for those with vaginas. In this episode, she dives deep into the common issues like urinary leakage, pain, and tension that can affect anyone, regardless of gender. Do you blow your nose while you pee like Bryde? Well, you shouldn't. From sneezing while peeing to managing scar tissue after abdominal surgery, Dr. Reardon breaks down the importance of proactive care and open conversations. This episode has something for everyone—because pelvic health is universal.
Find Dr. Sara Reardon on Instagram!
@ the.vagina.whisperer
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Brian Sloan has dedicated his career to perfecting the art of the machine-driven blowjob. This week Bryde and Jeremie enjoy a fascinating and hilarious conversation with Brian who details the ins and outs of AutoBlow, the leading brand of blowjob machines on the market. What makes a great blowjob? Tech and technique come together in the innovation of these machines, and if you want to hear how much further tech can take you, tune in to hear about the future potential of video syncing, voice control, and even mind reading. The testing process includes the haters, and the developers are in hiding because it wouldn’t be sex without stigma.
Find more at https://autoblow.com and research the makers Very Intelligent Ecommerce Inc.
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When we’re growing up, it’s hard to conceive that the future will feel any different than the present, but the slogan “it gets better”, made popular by sexpert Dan Savage specifically addressing LGBTQ+ youth, tries to bridge that gap with reassurance. But does it actually get better? This week, sex researcher Anna delivers a longitudinal analysis following 230 LGTBQ+ adolescents over three and a half years. The paper talks about the distress caused by harassment and the impact and correlation of social support on mental health outcomes. Turn on your mind with a listen to this dose of Carnal Knowledge, and be a beacon for kids still coming through it.
Link to Study:
Does It Get Better? A Longitudinal Analysis of Psychological Distress and Victimization in Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, and Questioning Youth
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They say a picture is worth a thousand words, but sometimes a few well-chosen words can ignite the imagination in ways a picture never could. In this episode, Carly Pfeiffer, founder of Read Aurore, delves into the world of erotic storytelling, exploring how reading erotica can be a more nuanced and fulfilling experience than visual porn. Carly discusses the educational benefits of erotica, from inspiring fresh bedroom ideas to providing a platform for diverse voices in the genre. Whether you're curious about the therapeutic aspects of writing erotica or just looking to expand your erotic horizons, this conversation is packed with both inspiration and practical advice.
Links:
Read Aurore
Instagram
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Does it really matter if one parent in a couple does more parenting? In today's episode, sex researcher Anna delivers some Carnal Knowledge to Jeremie and Bryde via a research study on how the division of child care can affect sexual intimacy and relationship quality in heterosexual couples. They chat about what influences parents when dividing up responsibilities, what those responsibilities really are, and the systemic barriers that prevent an equal division of child rearing. It turns out that relationship quality is indeed impacted by how this role is shared, and there is a gendered difference of how parents feel about their roles. Listen up!
Link to Study:
The Division of Child Care, Sexual Intimacy, and Relationship Quality in Couples
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When it comes to love and connection, our childhood experiences often cast long shadows. Today’s guest is Alex Bishop, a registered professional counsellor with strong roots in the IFS - or - Internal Family Systems framework, and the main focus of the conversation is attachment theory and how it impacts the way we form relationships - at home, at work, and at play. Bryde introduces the concept of IFS, a way of examining one’s inner experience from a lens of compassion and curiosity, making space for whatever burdens need to make themselves known, and finding a new way to care for oneself and one’s loved ones. Alex delivers his insight with thoughtfulness and clarity, and shares a little bit about his personal burden that resonated so much with Bryde. Tune in for some content that may open new doors of understanding, and offer a way of living and engaging with acceptance for all your parts.
Find Alex and his work here:
https://www.forloveweheal.com/
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Take a walk through a deep, dark, sexy dungeon and you know what you will find? Attachment styles doing what attachment styles do, playing out secure or anxious-attachment, matching lids to every pot, and finding the right configuration to work through deep desires and heal hurts. This week researcher Anna dishes out the Carnal Knowledge determined by a survey study of 771 BDSM and non-BDSM practitioners to explore whether BDSM is a maladaptive coping mechanism in response to early life dynamics. It reveals some interesting little tidbits about community vs private practitioners, attachment styles, and differences in experiences of trauma. Have a listen and a little bit of learning that will help us all to continue to destigmatize conversations about sex and sexual expression.
Link to study:
The Psychology of Kink: a Survey Study into the Relationships of Trauma and Attachment Style with BDSM Interests
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