Episódios
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🔹Ven Pomnyun’s Dharma Q&A
2021/11/14
🔹Question: Hello, Sunim Thank you so much for taking thetime to talk to us. I have a similar question. I am an addiction counselor for a nonprofit. I have been doing this for about a year and a half since I graduated college. Your talk, last week, really helped me with feelings of jealousy over salary. And you helped me realize that this is still the job that I want to do. However, I wanted to ask a follow up question about free time, energy, and balance in my life. I actually really enjoy the core parts of my job which is working directly with other people who are in need of support. I also really like my team which has made a big difference from the other social service jobs that I did before. I also feel like my performance is okay. However, the job is often still hard because of how it impacts my sense of freedom and because of how long the paperwork and other bureaucratic elements take. I feel like I am always working more than the 40 hours a week that I am paid for just to not fall behind. Organizational skills have always been one of my weak points, but all of my coworkers also spend more time doing paperwork than actually helping clients. I don't know how I can ever view this aspect of the job as play. Even though I love my job, it is so hard how far away I feel like I am from financial freedom. I have still been living with my parents since last year while I am saving money. Sometimes, I still get jealous of those who have more freedom to relax, travel, and grow since my job makes me so tired. I feel like I don't have enough time to take care of myself, reading, exercising, or pursuing my other interests, let alone improve at my job and my career. I don't know how I can ever start a family eventually like this. Sometimes, it makes me feel very tired and depressed. Sometimes, it gives me nightmares. I don't know how to work less or feel like I'm working less without feeling like I might be laid off, or I won't be growing fast enough in my career as expected. In the past, when I have had more free time, I've been able to stay very happy by exercising and pursuing my own hobbies and interests.However, even though this job is a passion of mine, and the core aspects feel like play, sometimes it feels like it is too demanding staying on top of all of the liability stuff for the city, the state, and the federal government and all of the paperwork. Sometimes, it feels too demanding for me to stay energized and live well.
🔻Jungto Dharma School(Introduction to Buddhism):https://www.jungtosociety.org/jungto-dharma-school-online-course/
🔻 All Jungto Society’ssocial platforms: http://linktr.ee/jungtoint
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🔹Ven Pomnyun’s Dharma Q&A
“Due to Negative Feedback I'm Losing Career Confidence"Selection from Casual Conversation with Ven. Pomnyun Sunim (December 19, 2020)
🔹Question: By listening to your wisdom through Youtube for last 3 years, actually increased and improved the perspective of my ilfe dramatically. I've become much happier in my relationships with my husband, my parents, children and friends. My question is related to my job stress. The job I've been doing now is relating to treating children with autism. My job requires assessing children with autism and training therapist providing parent training and provides programs for those children. I love my job because it compensates a lot of good payment and also I have a very flexible schedule and my job receives a lot of professional respect. Many times it is really rewarding to see my students improve their skills in terms of communication, social skills and academic skills. I've been receiving from many parents good feedbacks, they really appreciate the quality of my job as a supervisor. My stress is that recently I start receiving some negative feedbacks from some parents and I became very intimidated and I'm losing a lot of confidence. So I need to overcome those kinds of stress.
🔻Jungto Dharma School(Introduction to Buddhism):https://www.jungtosociety.org/jungto-dharma-school-online-course/
🔻 All Jungto Society’s social platforms: http://linktr.ee/jungtoint
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Estão a faltar episódios?
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🔹Ven Pomnyun’s Dharma Q&A
“I'm Confused by the Sudden Change at Work?” Selection from Casual Conversation with Ven. Pomnyun Sunim (May 16, 2021)
🔹Question: I'm working in a Japanese company. Under the company's system, all employees should move to another department every 5 to 7 years. Last month I was ordered to transfer department from May 1. I've been in my previous department for 6 years since I started working, I'm very confused by the sudden change. This change is a good opportunity for my career, and I thank the company for their consideration. However, after being told to move, I just suffer from anxieties, sadness, and loneliness. I cannot be pleased. My colleagues who have been with me for 6 years become my family and there are many things I want to accomplish in my previous department. It's just a department change, but I feel my world is completely changing. How shall I accept this situation and how can I get rid of my obsession with the previous department?
🔻Jungto Dharma School(Introduction to Buddhism):https://www.jungtosociety.org/jungto-dharma-school-online-course/
🔻 All Jungto Society’s social platforms: http://linktr.ee/jungtoint
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🔹Ven Pomnyun’s Dharma Q&A
2021. 7. 11
🔹Question: Thank you so much for taking my question.In listening to past Dharma talks, I heard Sunim describe or talk about developing empathy for those who have created suffering in our lives as a way of overcoming attachment to the past and suffering in the present. Part of what I'm working through is particularly horrific kind of abusemthat I grew up with at the hands of my father. And I don't see how I could ever develop empathy for a person who did to a child, to me, the things that my father did.And I'm wondering if there's another path forward.Thank you so much.
🔻Jungto Dharma School(Introduction to Buddhism):https://www.jungtosociety.org/jungto-dharma-school-online-course/
🔻 All Jungto Society’ssocial platforms: http://linktr.ee/jungtoint
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🔹Ven Pomnyun’s Dharma Q&A
Selection from Casual Conversation with Ven. Pomnyun Sunim (July 11, 2021)
🔹Question: My father has been violent to me physically and verbally. He hit me and my mom. He always told me you should play a role of a boy. I couldn’t have built basic trust to people and life seems very absurd and unjust. I was diagnosed as depression 15 years ago and another mental disease 2 years ago. He sometimes wrote letters saying that he’s very sorry it’s all for your sake and his childhood was not easy. But he repeated the same verbal and physical abuse afterwards. So I found all of his words untrustworthy and hypocritical. I just stopped talking to him years ago and ran away to a faraway country but still suffering. I tried to be grateful to him but it seems so hypocritical as well, so I stopped praying. I don’t want to get married nor have children because I think my spouse and children would suffer as well. I don’t know what to do.
🔻Jungto Dharma School(Introduction to Buddhism):https://www.jungtosociety.org/jungto-dharma-school-online-course/
🔻 All Jungto Society’ssocial platforms: http://linktr.ee/jungtoint
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🔹Ven Pomnyun’s Dharma Q&A
2024. 11. 3.
🔹Question: Questioner)Hello, Sunim. Nice to see you again. Can you hear me, everyone? Yes? OK, good. I drew a map here. My dad lives here, and my sister lived over here. This is north. My dad wants me to move there to this house. He sat me down when I was over at his place last weekend. But I don't want to move there. I'll just admit that. It would really disrupt what's happening in my life right now. The thing is that he helped my sister with this house, and as my dad is getting older, he wants to make sure everyone is taken care of before he dies. He helped my sister build this house. It was his land. He built a shop which was a wood shop. He likes to do wood carpentry as a hobby, make things out of wood, and I guess he's doing it even less nowadays. And he also designed it so that somebody could move in, put a kitchen and a shower in. And he was definitely thinking that somebody was me. I never tried to argue with him about it. I just sat down and listened, and he said, "Please think about it seriously." And he rammed me. As much as it would be good to save money on rent, I really appreciate where I live now. And I need to have this conversation with him somehow. So far, I've let it be one way. Thank you.
🔻Jungto Dharma School(Introduction to Buddhism):https://www.jungtosociety.org/jungto-dharma-school-online-course/
🔻 All Jungto Society’s social platforms: http://linktr.ee/jungtoint
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🔹Ven Pomnyun’s Dharma Q&A
2022.12.18
🔹Question: Thank you for allowing me to ask a question. My daughter is going through a divorce, and she is separated from her husband about two months ago. They had agreed to share caring for their 13 year old son and 11 year old daughter by alternating weeks. My grandson refused to stay with his mom when she lived with me, but he said that when she lives on her own, he would live with her. So last month, she got her own place and she drove both children to her new place and the 13 year old refused to get out of the car. He told my daughter that he loves his dad and that he hates her, and he refuses to stay with her. So, the divorce has been very difficult for everybody.I'm wondering what advice can you give us?
🔻Jungto Dharma School(Introduction to Buddhism):https://www.jungtosociety.org/jungto-dharma-school-online-course/
🔻 All Jungto Society’s social platforms: http://linktr.ee/jungtoint
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🔹Ven Pomnyun’s Dharma Q&A
2022. 10. 09
🔹Question: I'm very honored to ask the question, and thank you very much. In June of this year, my dad passed away. We installed a memorial tree and a memorial bench in the honor of my dad to help my grieving mom. My dad was cremated. At the time, we didn't know what to do with his ashes. Recently, my mom wanted to bury his ashes to a cemetery. So, I asked all my siblings sending out an email if they would like to share the cost of the burial. All of our four siblings are financially stable. One of my sisters got angry and said, "We did the memorial tree and the bench. Why do we have to share the burial cost? This seems like an endless cost. This is very burdening on me!" She said "Budam" in Korean. I said to my sister, "If you feel that way, you don't have to." There was tension in the conversation. Since then, she hasn't contacted my mom or called her who is grieving. Currently, I am a student of Jungto Buddhism Course, and I've learned what you said about knowing the truth. The truth is that my sister and I are different. I have found some peace in that, but I don't have peace some days. It's like a seesaw. Some days, I have peace, and other days, I'm angry and sad. So, I ask for your guidance in having peace in my heart.
🔻Jungto Dharma School(Introduction to Buddhism):https://www.jungtosociety.org/jungto-dharma-school-online-course/
🔻 All Jungto Society’s social platforms:http://linktr.ee/jungtoint
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🔹Ven Pomnyun’s Dharma Q&A
2024. 7. 9
🔹Question : Thank you for taking my question. Wespend a lot of time, money, and effort on our kids, or example, on private school, extra curriculum classes, music, and sports. As parents, we are working very hard to support all of these. And we hope that our time, money, and efforts are well spent, and the kids would appreciate it by fully utilizing these opportunities. I know that this is our desire to properly train the kids, and we shouldn't have that desire. However, it's hard to not expect anything. I don't mean to expect that they will take care of us when we get older, or they will buy us something. But we hope that they can work to their full potential. Sometimes, when we see kids watching YouTube videos or playing games, we feel that they don't really appreciate these opportunities. And I ask myself why I have to spend the money and effort on private school, sports, and music. We can save that money to do more good for society or retire early. Sometimes, I think it's my own anxiety that I have to spend that money on kids because I'm afraid that they might fail in the future.So, I'm trying to figure out what is the problem and trying to stop it.I've been thinking about that for over two months and I couldn't find the answer.
🔻Jungto Dharma School(Introduction to Buddhism):https://www.jungtosociety.org/jungto-dharma-school-online-course/
🔻 All Jungto Society’s social platforms:http://linktr.ee/jungtoint
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🔹Ven Pomnyun’s Dharma Q&A
2024. 7. 9
🔹Question : Good morning, Sunim. It's good to see you. Ihave a family-related question today. My mother, who lives alone, would like to sell her home and move to a new house. However, she has a lot of difficulty making decisions, and she's fearful of change. As a result, she suffers from anxiety. My sister has been the main person helping my mother to look for a new home. But, because of my mother's fear of making a decision, she's been unable to choose anywhere. My sister is also reluctant to make a decision because she doesn't want to be blamed in case my mother regrets her choice. This situation has been dragging on for a long time now, and my mother has lost a few opportunities to sell her house because the buyers didn't want to wait for her. My question is, "How can I help my mother overcome her fear so that she can move forward and hopefully live the remainder of her life comfortably?" Thank you very much.
🔻Jungto Dharma School(Introduction to Buddhism):https://www.jungtosociety.org/jungto-dharma-school-online-course/
🔻 All Jungto Society’ssocial platforms: http://linktr.ee/jungtoint
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🔹Ven Pomnyun’s Dharma Q&A
Selection from Casual Conversation with Ven. Pomnyun Sunim(October 3, 2021)
🔹Question : In my family I feel like I’m being sort of annoying to them and I’m not doing enough for them. Usually even if they tell me that I’m doing fine, there’s some part of me that thinks that I’m just being annoying to them and I’m not doing good for them. I just want to know how I can change my mindset so I don’t feel so sad all the time.
🔻Jungto Dharma School(Introduction to Buddhism):https://www.jungtosociety.org/jungto-dharma-school-online-course/
🔻 All Jungto Society’ssocial platforms: http://linktr.ee/jungtoint
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🔹Ven Pomnyun’s Dharma Q&A
2014.11.8
🔹Question : Hi, It is really nice to meet you. I am a Korean who moved to the United States about four years ago. I have a husband who is a Jewish- American and I am a Korean. I wanted to ask you what kind of effort I can make to make a peaceful and loving family in terms of raising children for the family.
🔻Jungto Dharma School(Introduction to Buddhism):https://www.jungtosociety.org/jungto-dharma-school-online-course/
🔻 All Jungto Society’ssocial platforms: http://linktr.ee/jungtoint
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🔹Ven Pomnyun’s Dharma Q&A
Ven. Pomnyun's Answer to " I Don’t Want to Live InCanada Just Because of My Husband." Selection from a Dharma Q&A session at UBC (Oct. 3, 2017)
🔹Question: I have a really personal question to ask you. I was born, educated, and worked in Korea. I came here to study temporarily and I fell in love with a guy, who’s Canadian and was born and educated here. Eventually we got married without any approvals from our families. It’s been already 19 years. Now they are super supportive, of course, my family. I really did my best to keep my family happy and healthy. But as I’m getting older, I feel like ‘Oh my god, what’s in our retirement?”, what’s in our picture?’ kind of desires. Of course I want to go back to Korea when I get older, because when I was young, I was happier. So these days I got to conclusion that ‘Oh, maybe I can live half and half.// I can go to Korea for a few months and then come here a few months. But my second thought is ‘Am I selfish or what?’ As you previously said today, I have my own confusion with my own value system. Is it a right thing? Since I was educated in Korea, I still have some Korean system that family should stay together, especially husband and wife. Even though our relationship is happy and healthy, is it really happy and healthy if I stay here just for him? So I’m stuck at this stage and I don’t know what to do.
🔻Jungto Dharma School(Introduction to Buddhism):https://www.jungtosociety.org/jungto-dharma-school-online-course/
🔻 All Jungto Society’s social platforms:http://linktr.ee/jungtoint
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🔹Ven Pomnyun’s Dharma Q&A
Selection from a Dharma Q&A session at Bethesda ChevyChase Regional Service Center in Washington D.C. (September 18, 2019)
🔹Question: It’s been 15 years since I got married and my daughter is 12 years old. Just hitting the beginning of teenager age. Before I even resolved my relationship with myhusband, things that I do not agree with, like his personality-wise or daily habit-wise, I see my daughter displaying the same habits and personalities that my husband has that I’m not crazy about. So I noticed lately that the way I tryto handle the situation is I’m becoming way too strict and I try to discipline my daughter more than what’s needed because I have the frustration towards my husband and seeing that from my own child is making me go crazy. So I don’t know how to handle this without hurting my daughter because I sometimes do realize I go way above and beyond to try to fix it. I know it’s in her, she might have been born with it. It might be her genes. That’s the frustration I have with my own 12-years daughter, handling her. So if you can just advise mehow I should be a wise mom without worsening this relationship with my daughter, I’ll appreciate it.
🔻Jungto Dharma School(Introduction to Buddhism):https://www.jungtosociety.org/jungto-dharma-school-online-course/
🔻 All Jungto Society’s social platforms:http://linktr.ee/jungtoint
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🔹Ven Pomnyun’s DharmaQ&A
Selection from a Dharma Q&A session at Bethesda ChevyChase Regional Service Center in Washington D.C. (September 18, 2019)
🔹Question: Hi! My father lives in California. He’s older, he’s disabled. He’s not very healthy. And he’s really strong in his faith in Christianity. So he has a really strong beliefsthat president Trump is there because God put him there. And the only way to have it end] is through Jesus Christ. [He’s also disabled] and he has almost died many times. So I feel that his faith and a lot of other ways and the life he has right now. On the other way when I go home, he asks me questions about am I saved, and what do I really believe and I find itreally uncomfortable because I know what he wants me to say and I know that he’s worried that I’ll go to hell and I’m not born again. And also he sends me stuff on social media. Things that are like, Jesus was born out of a virgin, herose from the dead, he did this Muhammad didn’t do that and all that stuff that isn’t helpful. And so right now up to this point I try to deflect, I try to be respectful, and I’ve tried to ignore. So I wan t to show up the best way I can for him, to honor him and also to ensure that I hold myself in a way that Irespect him fully. And not feel just some sort of frustration.
🔻Jungto Dharma School(Introduction to Buddhism):https://www.jungtosociety.org/jungto-dharma-school-online-course/
🔻 All Jungto Society’ssocial platforms: http://linktr.ee/jungtoint
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🔹Ven Pomnyun’s Dharma Q&A
August 14, 2021
🔹Question : My husband and I have been looking after his 87-year-old mother with dementia for the last 6 years. We both had to give up our jobs to look after her in her own home. She does not want to go to a nursing home. This has affected our marriage as well as our physical and mental health. We have asked for help from my husband’s older brother but he does not offer any help. Moreover, he only visits a few times a year. He doesn’t talk to his mom on the phone. So we feel very angry, disappointed, and hurt that he does not offer any help. How should we deal with this problem?
🔻Jungto Dharma School(Introduction to Buddhism):https://www.jungtosociety.org/jungto-dharma-school-online-course/
🔻 Find more at thefollowing links:
http://www.jungtosociety.org
http://www.pomnyun.com
https://www.instagram.com/jungto.society/
https://www.instagram.com/ven.pomnyun.sunim/
https://www.facebook.com/pomnyundailyquote
https://insighttimer.com/jungtokorea
🔻 All Jungto Society’s social platforms: http://linktr.ee/jungtoint
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🔹Ven Pomnyun’s Dharma Q&A
2021. 4. 5
🔹Question : Hello Sunim, Thank you very much for this precious opportunity, I have been watching your videos for many years. I’m from Sweden and right now I’m in Taiwan learning Chinese. I have been separated from my son since 2009 due to perjury. From 2009 until now I have no contact whatsoever with my son. I do not know how he lookslike now. In 2014, the Swedish Court of Appeal stated that my son and I should be reunited. But again, because of foul play, this ruling was annulled by his father. My question is, should I practice moral courage and speak out against this human rights violation and injustice? Or should I just keep quite? How does it relate to the dependent origination and equanimity?
🔻Jungto Dharma School(Introduction to Buddhism):https://www.jungtosociety.org/jungto-dharma-school-online-course/
🔻 Find more at thefollowing links:
http://www.jungtosociety.org
http://www.pomnyun.com
https://www.instagram.com/jungto.society/
https://www.instagram.com/ven.pomnyun.sunim/
https://www.facebook.com/pomnyundailyquote
https://insighttimer.com/jungtokorea
🔻 All Jungto Society’ssocial platforms: http://linktr.ee/jungtoint
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🔹Ven Pomnyun’s Dharma Q&A
September 19, 2021
🔹Question : I get extremely stressed living with my mother and my husband because of their differences, and also from having to care for my mother-in-law who has cancer. The thing that stresses me a lot is the fact that my mother is helping too much around the house. Now that my mother-in-law is living with us, the amount of work that she’s doing at my house is unbearable and as a daughter, it stressesme out.
🔻Jungto Dharma School(Introduction to Buddhism):https://www.jungtosociety.org/jungto-dharma-school-online-course/
🔻 Find more at thefollowing links:
http://www.jungtosociety.org
http://www.pomnyun.com
https://www.instagram.com/jungto.society/
https://www.instagram.com/ven.pomnyun.sunim/
https://www.facebook.com/pomnyundailyquote
https://insighttimer.com/jungtokorea
🔻 All Jungto Society’ssocial platforms: http://linktr.ee/jungtoint
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🔹Ven Pomnyun’s Dharma Q&A
2023. 12. 19
🔹Question : (Questioner)I translated my question into English using Google Translator. So, please understand that it may be a bit awkward for other audience members. My question is...first, thank you for your valuable time. I know that this opportunity to ask questions is rare, like today. I thought carefully about what questions I would ask. I have many concerns and questions. I thought about why I have these thoughts and why I'm worried about them. I think it is because my words and actions do not match. As I raise my children, I hear all the tips people giveabout how it is good to do this or how to do something that is helpful. But there are many things that I do not put into practice. How can I improve my current situation of not putting them into practice? I know what I should do,but I don't do due to laziness
🔻Jungto Dharma School(Introduction to Buddhism):https://www.jungtosociety.org/jungto-dharma-school-online-course/
🔻 Find more at thefollowing links:
http://www.jungtosociety.org
http://www.pomnyun.com
https://www.instagram.com/jungto.society/
https://www.instagram.com/ven.pomnyun.sunim/
https://www.facebook.com/pomnyundailyquote
https://insighttimer.com/jungtokorea
🔻 All Jungto Society’s social platforms: http://linktr.ee/jungtoint
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🔹Ven Pomnyun’s Dharma Q&A
2022. 2. 19
🔹Question : Hello Sunim. I live in Torrance, California. Thank you for giving me this opportunity to ask you a question.I have a sister who lives with her husband in country side inKorea.They used to be very rich but they lost all their fortune during IMF,so now, their financial situation is rather precarious.They have a son who is in mid 40s. He lives in Seoul with his wife and a daughter.He has a very seriousillness. He's losing his capability to take care of himself slowly and there's no treatment for that. So there's no hope for getting better. Her husband doesn't want to talk about their son's illness at all. He just ignores and doesn't offer any comfort to her son. So when my sister calls me on the phone,all her financial problems, her son's worsening disability, and her husband's indifferent attitude. So she has a lot of unhappy things going on in her life. And she says, "Sister, I envy you. You don't have any of my problems. That's why you're happy."That's true, really I'm very happy and I have none of her problems. I really don't know what to say to her. My question is when my situation is much better than hers, I don't experience any of her difficulties in her life, how can I offer any comfort to her? What is practical things I cando to reduce her unhappiness? Thank you. (Sunim) Do you want me to provide you words of comforts or provide you an objective analysis of the situation? (Questioner) What I want is when you're in a much better situation and when you hearsomeone's difficulty, I have so many problems, is there any thing I can offer to be helpful? Or I can say, "Yes, I studied Buddhism. I listen to the Dharma talk of Sunim. So all your problem is in your mind. This is the Buddhist truth." I don't think that's a very kind way to say things. So, both waysI want to hear. Thank you.
🔻Jungto Dharma School(Introduction to Buddhism):https://www.jungtosociety.org/jungto-dharma-school-online-course/
🔻 Find more at thefollowing links:
http://www.jungtosociety.org
http://www.pomnyun.com
https://www.instagram.com/jungto.society/
https://www.instagram.com/ven.pomnyun.sunim/
https://www.facebook.com/pomnyundailyquote
https://insighttimer.com/jungtokorea
🔻 All Jungto Society’s social platforms: http://linktr.ee/jungtoint
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