Эпизоды
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In this powerful and honest episode, we dive deep into the complicated relationship between shame and self-confidence. From the invisible weight of social norms to the internal battles we fight daily, we explore how shame shows up in our lives—and how it holds us back from becoming our most confident, authentic selves. We talk about the importance of surrounding yourself with friends who lift you up, how positive self-talk can shift your mindset, and why healing yourself is essential before stepping back into the dating world. We’re getting real about self-sabotage, self-worth, and what it truly takes to rebuild your confidence from the inside out. If you've ever struggled with feeling "not enough," this one's for you.
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In this special episode, we’re stepping outside of our usual niche to shine a light on a topic that affects so many but is often left in the dark—mental health and suicide prevention. In honor of Mental Health Awareness Month, we’re joined by Brook, a passionate Community Suicide Prevention Outreach Specialist with Nomi Health and the Co-Chair of the Utah Board of Directors for the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention.
Brook shares invaluable insight on where individuals can turn for help, the many free resources available, and what we can all do to support ourselves and our loved ones. Most importantly, we talk about the truth that needs to be heard: you are not alone.
This episode also includes a deeply personal moment from Chan, who bravely opens up about her own struggles with mental health. It’s raw, real, emotional—and a reminder that vulnerability can be a powerful force for healing.
⚠️ Trigger Warning: This episode discusses sensitive topics including mental health challenges and suicide. Please take care while listening.
If you or someone you know is struggling, there is help. You are seen, you are valued, and you are never alone.
Below are a list of resources that you can utilize if you are going through it and just need some extra help.
https://www.iloveyoubroproject.org/
988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline https://988lifeline.org
Call, text, or chat 988 if you are having a hard time. The 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline is a free, confidential hotline available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year. Crisis workers are available to help if you’re in distress, thinking of suicide, or need emotional support. Interpreters who speak more than 150 languages are available.
SafeUT apps https://safeut.org/ Download the SafeUT apps to chat with a licensed counselor for support or submit a confidential tip right from your phone. The apps are free and available for iPhone and Android devices. SafeUT is available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year.
Warm Line 833-773-2588. Sometimes you just need someone to talk to about your struggles with mental health or substance use. They have certified peer support specialists to help you solve problems. It’s free and open from 8 a.m. to 11 p.m. every day.
Caring Connections 801-585-9522 https://nursing.utah.edu/caring-connections The University of Utah College of Nursing offers grief support groups to help you cope with a different kind of loss and grief, including suicide.
The Sharing Place 801-466-6730 https://www.thesharingplace.org
The Sharing Place provides grief support services to youth, teens, and their families who have suffered the loss of a loved one. Develop coping skills through activities like art, play, and physical activity.
If you are in Utah specifically, below is a list of local resources
● 211 Utah https://211utah.org
● American Foundation on Suicide Prevention, Utah Chapter https://afsp.org/chapter/utah
● Community crisis intervention and support services https://tinyurl.com/3sat854p
● Healthy Minds https://healthyminds.utah.gov/
● Live On Utah https://liveonutah.org
● National Alliance on Mental Illness, Utah (NAMI Utah) https://www.namiut.org/
● Utah Domestic Violence Coalition 1-800-897-5465 https://udvc.org
● Utah Office of Substance Abuse and Mental Health https://sumh.utah.gov
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Content ID for music DWDZYXGRNDT7KVHM, WVT8HHGLEZ54VNNU, 7XZEJ7G2BNRSHFS8 -
Пропущенные эпизоды?
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Hey look Mom! We made it! Episode 20 coming in hot with our most requested topic... Male and female POV on dating! This week, we’re getting into the male perspective with a special guest who doesn’t hold back. After a 14-year marriage and 10 years in the single world, he’s got stories, opinions, and a great insight on what he wants. He breaks down what dating looks like from his point of view, sharing real-life examples, frustrations, and a few surprises along the way. We explore what guys really go through—and realize maybe we’re not as different as we think. We’re not speaking for all men or women here—just having an honest convo from both sides. And when Chan gets a little too real? Let’s just say... you’ll most definitely laugh out loud.
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In this episode, Karina and Chan are back with all the juicy updates! From unexpected dates to wild encounters out in the real world, we’re spilling it all. Chan went out with someone we never saw coming, and we're diving into whether relationships can really work when your beliefs totally clash. We’re talking compatibility, real-life connections, sex, and why Karina and Chan are convinced they’re destined to stay single (spoiler: we’re laughing through it). Plus—major moment—Karina finally took a nap! Tune in for laughs, real talk, and all the spicy stories you’ve missed.
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This week, we’re getting real (and a little rebellious) with our guest Jennie — who left the church and an 18-year marriage like it was a bad group chat and never looked back. She takes us through her journey of shedding shame, realizing her body wasn’t just for making casseroles and babies, and figuring out who she actually is outside of religion and marriage.
We talk about the awkward (and sometimes hilarious) parts of finding yourself sexually after years of repression, the therapy sessions that cracked her wide open, and the people who showed up when she found herself again. Jennie opens up about rebuilding from scratch — with no blueprint, but plenty of courage — and learning to be unapologetically proud of the woman she’s become.
This episode is raw, funny, honest, and perfect for anyone who's ever had a moment of “WTF am I doing with my life?” and needed to hear, “You’re not alone — and you’ve got this.”
Most importantly, Jennie shares how she learned to be proud of the woman she is today — stronger, wiser, and finally living life on her own terms. We are so proud of you girl and so happy to have a new woman to add to the friend list!
Want to talk to Jennie about making all of your hair dreams come true? You can message her on TickTok or Instagram @TheJennieAffect
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This week, we’re busting myths and dropping facts—from erectile dysfunction and STIs to the age-old claim that men want sex more than women (uhh, let’s talk about that). We’re calling out the BS and keeping it all the way real.
Fellas, want to know where the G spot really is? We got you. And yes, we’re spilling the tea on the G spot for men too—because pleasure ain’t one-sided.
And ladies, let’s talk about the 7 most erogenous zones on a woman’s body that deserve way more attention. (Hint: it’s not just about the obvious spots—think neck, ears, lower back... 👀)
We go deep into ego, shame, and why asking for help in the bedroom—or the doctor’s office—should never feel embarrassing.
This episode is sexy, informative, and real AF. So whether you're tryna improve your sex game or just love a good convo, you’ll wanna hit play on this one.
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SpiritualSmackdown #DatingInYour40s #DatingDisasters #SingleLife #DatingFails #LoveAndLust #ModernDating #RelationshipTalk #PodcastLife #DatingOver40 #FunnyPodcast #DatingStories #DatingStruggles #KeepingItReal #BestFriendPodcast #SpicyConversations #PodcastEpisode #NewEpisode #WomenSupportingWomen #PodcastLife #InspiringStories #sexmyths #gspots #sex -
Getting Spiritually Smacked with Tarot Readings by Haylie
In this episode, we sit down for a raw, honest, and unexpectedly emotional tarot reading with our magical, intuitive, and absolutely radiant friend Haylie. From the moment the cards hit the table, the truths came pouring out — and baby, they did NOT hold back. 💀✨
We dive into conversations about life, love, depression, growth, and everything in between. Haylie’s reading didn’t just call us out (gently… sort of 😅), it offered clarity, comfort, and a few much-needed laughs. This episode is a mix of tough truths, real talk, and those spiritual slaps we didn’t know we needed.
Haylie is an absolute gem of a human and guided us through the reading with love, intuition, and a little bit of sass. Whether you're a tarot lover, skeptic, or just here for the vibes — you’re gonna feel this one.
Grab your tea, light a candle, and come get spiritually smacked with us. 🔮💬💕
If you are looking for a reading of your own, please reach to Haylie on Instagram @haylies_comets
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#TarotTalk #RealTalkAndTarot #TheCardsDontLie #SpiritualDownloads #DivineMessages #IntuitiveAF #MysticVibes #TarotTruths #GuidedByTheCards #SpiritualSlap #SpiritualSmackdown #DatingInYour40s #DatingDisasters #SingleLife #DatingFails #LoveAndLust #ModernDating #RelationshipTalk #PodcastLife #DatingOver40 #FunnyPodcast #DatingStories #DatingStruggles #KeepingItReal #BestFriendPodcast #SpicyConversations #PodcastEpisode #NewEpisode #WomenSupportingWomen #PodcastLife #InspiringStories -
This week, we sit down with an incredible guest whose journey is nothing short of inspiring. She went from being in a relationship with a Mormon man and raising five children to embracing her true self, falling in love with a woman, and launching her own dance business, Floor Play by Fay. She’s all about confidence, empowerment, and helping women feel comfortable in their own skin—one high-heeled dance step at a time. We’re talking transformation, self-love, and the power of women supporting women. You don’t want to miss this one! 💃✨
You can find Fay on her socials and check out her website for classes!
@https://www.instagram.com/fay2themax/
@https://www.facebook.com/faylena.maxim/
@https://www.floorplaybyfay.com/
Thank you for all of your support! We are so thankful for all the wonderful feedback, likes comments, shares, and overall ego pumps!
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Well, it happened. We don’t know how we got here but, here we are! Dating in your 40s! Buckle up, because it’s a wild ride! In this episode, we dive into the absolute chaos that is modern dating at this stage in life—the red flags, the disappointments, the rare gems, and the hilarious horror stories. But of course, things take a turn when our audio guy decides to put us in the hot seat, asking some unexpected and personal questions about what it’s like to date us. Things get messy, real, and ridiculously funny—just how we like it!
Thank you for all of your support! We are so thankful for all the wonderful feedback, likes comments, shares, and overall ego pumps!
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Ever wondered what it really means to be in an open relationship? In this episode, we sit down with the author of For Better or Even Better -Lauren Hayes, who is also a swinger and ENM (Ethical Non-Monogamy) lifestyle and relationship coach. She takes us deep into the world of ENM, sharing the truths, myths, breaking down misconceptions, and spicy details about love without limits. We also dive into her book, exploring how couples can thrive in unconventional relationships. Trust us—this one is unfiltered, eye-opening, and seriously steamy… or at least spicy vanilla 😉
The link to Laurens book – For Better or Even Better: 7 Lessons on Love & Life from a Non-Monogamist on amazon - https://a.co/d/47lEil1
Thank you for all of your support! We are so thankful for all the wonderful feedback, likes comments, shares, and overall ego pumps!
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Look, we’re not experts… but we’ve got Google to help us out! We took a deep dive into the internet’s list of dating do’s and don’ts, and let’s just say… we have thoughts. In this episode, we’re breaking down all the so-called “rules” of dating—and giving our unfiltered, and slightly chaotic opinions. Some we totally agree with, and others? Yeah, not so much. Expect plenty of laughs, opinions, debates, and probably a few side-eye moments as we give our take on what’s actually good advice and what’s just straight-up ridiculous.
Tune in for the laughs, the lessons, and maybe even a little tough love. Don’t be the walking red flag—press play now! 🎧💘
Got a dating fail? Slide into our DMs—we might just share it on air! 😉
Thank you for all of your support! We are so thankful for all the wonderful feedback, likes comments, shares, and overall ego pumps!
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After a 2 week break and a couple recording hiccups were back baby! We’re officially in the studio, and we’re bringing the same raw, unfiltered energy with us! In this episode, we spill the tea on our recent dates—some good, some… well, let’s just say memorable. We dive into our dating styles, how emotional attachment plays a role when sex is involved.... or does it?! Lots of laughs and some side commentary from our new partner in audio, Sean! Grab your drink, get comfy, and join us for another juicy convo about dating, lust, and everything in between!
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In this episode, we're diving back into the world of dating apps and trying to navigate finding love (or at least a good laugh) while juggling our crazy schedules. Between sharing hilarious messages from the apps, and recording while under the weather, we’re embracing the messy reality of modern dating.
We had some scheduling conflicts so next week episode we will be shooting the shiz with our special guests from the podcast A Little Bit Of Me In You!
Thank you for all of your support! We are so thankful for all the wonderful feedback, likes comments, shares, and overall ego pumps!
Stay Connected!
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Let’s kick off the new year with confidence! In this episode, we dive into the power of self-confidence, affirmations, and positive self-talk. Learn how to be kinder to yourself, embrace your worth, start over stronger than ever, and let go of anything that no longer serves you. It's time to start fresh and step into your best self!
Book recommendations in this episode
(We are not sponsored or affiliated with either book recommendation)
The Universe has your back by Gabrielle Bernstein
Coffee Self Talk by Kristen Helmstetter
Thank you for all of your support! We are so thankful for all the wonderful feedback, likes comments, shares, and overall ego pumps!
Stay Connected!
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In this episode, we dive into the fascinating science behind sex! From surprising fun facts to the quirks of human biology, we’re exploring what makes our bodies and minds tick in the bedroom. Join us for hilarious conversations, unexpected discoveries, and our signature dose of candid humor. Whether you’re here for the knowledge or the giggles, this episode will leave you entertained and enlightened. Don’t miss it!
Thank you for all of your support! We are so thankful for all of the wonderful feedback, likes comments, shares, and overall ego pumps!
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Ever wonder why we’re still single? In this episode, we’re spilling all the tea on our single status, breaking down the good, the bad, and the downright hilarious reasons why we haven’t settled down. Spoiler alert: we’re picky, we have high standards, and we’re patient enough to wait for the right one. From navigating red flags to knowing our worth, we’re keeping it real and raw. Tune in for laughs, lessons, and a little self-reflection as we dive deep into the single life
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In this steamy episode, we’re pulling back the curtain on sexual fantasies. Karina and Chan will be baring it all as we explore what turns us on, what we’ve dreamed about, and what we’ve dared to try (or hope to). From the most common to the downright surprising, we explore what fuels desire for both men and women. What are the most common fantasies for men and women? How do they differ, and what do they reveal about our desires? From role-playing to forbidden encounters, we’re exploring it all with our signature mix of honesty, humor, and unfiltered truth.
Get ready for a bold, no-holds-barred conversation that might just make you rethink what you really want.
Thank you for all of your support! We are so thankful for all of the wonderful feedback, likes comments, shares, and overall ego pumps!
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Dating in the modern world is a wild ride amiright?! We’re here for ALL of it! This week, we’re getting real about catching feelings and figuring out if they’re mutual, leaning into those feelings, and getting real and raw about sending nudes (Is it too soon? Too late? Too much?). We’ll also dive into having the confidence to walk away when it’s not right, setting realistic timelines for meeting in person, and managing expectations in the wild world of modern romance. Chan gets a little heated and a little feisty on some topics in this episode so listen up! Grab a drink, buckle up, and join us for a hilarious and unfiltered chat about love, lust, and everything in between.
Thank you for all of your support! We are so thankful for all of the wonderful feedback, likes comments, shares, and overall ego pumps!
Stay Connected!
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Dating in the digital age is a wild ride! This week, we’re talking about the highs and lows of modern romance—getting ghosted, the shocking reality of being catfished, and the art (or chaos) of dating multiple people, we’re sharing our personal experiences and lessons learned along the way. Plus, we’re spilling the tea on receiving explicit snaps: Is it flirty fun, or a recipe for disaster? And what happens when catching feelings gets in the way of staying true to yourself? Join us as we navigate the highs, lows, and hilarious moments of dating in today’s world. Grab a drink—this one’s juicy!
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!!THIS EPISODE IS VERY EXPLICIT!! Get ready to turn up the heat! In this episode, we’re delving into the thrilling and often taboo topics of sex, desire, and what men and women really want when the lights go out. With a special male guest, we break down the secrets behind our wildest fantasies, unfiltered preferences, and those "off-limits" topics that make the bedroom sizzle and we are not holding back! From confessions that might surprise you to an honest look at what makes intimacy unforgettable, this episode promises to be as raw as it is spicy. Tune in for laughs, gasps, and plenty of heat as we explore the art of pleasure and what men and women truly crave in their most intimate moments. Warning: things get explicit and VERY spicy!
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