Эпизоды
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The Agony Aunties delve into the complexities of preverbal trauma, explaining why it is difficult to process such trauma and how it affects the body and brain. Through a detailed example of a young child who suffered early neglect, the discussion highlights how trauma manifests and persists beyond early childhood. They give their insights on therapeutic approaches like EMDR, sensory regulation, and the importance of co-regulation. Additional resources from experts like Bessel van der Kolk, Peter Levine, Bruce Perry, and the concept of the polyvagal system are recommended for deeper understanding. The episode underscores the importance of patience, self-compassion, and the development of a sensory toolbox for trauma survivors.
Additional Resources:
The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk – A groundbreaking book on how trauma is stored in the body and how we can begin to heal.
Somatic Experiencing by Peter Levine – Learn more about Peter Levine’s body-based approach to resolving trauma.
What Happened to You? by Bruce Perry & Oprah Winfrey – A compassionate, neuroscience-based look at childhood trauma and healing.
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In this expert-led episode, Emily Samuel is joined by Dr Henry Venter to explore the vital role resilience plays in a child’s development. Together, they delve into the tools, habits, and parenting strategies that help children adapt to challenges, manage emotions, and build inner strength in an ever-changing world.Whether your child is navigating friendship struggles, academic stress, or emotional setbacks, this conversation offers accessible insights to help them thrive.
Find more on Dr Venter: https://www.nu.edu/degrees/social-sciences/faculty/dr-henry-venter/
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In this episode, the Agony Aunties address a heart-wrenching question from a listener facing a terminal diagnosis. They offer invaluable advice on how to communicate this devastating news to teenage children without causing unnecessary fear or resorting to dishonesty. They emphasise the importance of honesty and ongoing dialogue, suggest starting the conversation by asking the children what they already understand about the illness, and provide strategies to help manage the emotional burden for both the parent and the children. They also discuss the benefits of using supportive resources from organisations like Child Bereavement UK and Macmillan, and the option of preparing messages and videos for future milestones in the child's life. The discussion concludes with advice on engaging schools and other family members for additional support.
Support links:
Macmillan Cancer Support: https://www.macmillan.org.uk/
Child Bereavement UK: https://www.childbereavementuk.org/
Please subscribe and leave a review—it truly makes all the difference! Follow Julia at @juliasamuelmbe for more insights, tips, and conversations on life's challenges and how to improve your mental well-being.
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In this special live-recorded episode of Therapy Works, we explore the often unspoken patterns that shape our families — and ourselves.
Whether you're navigating sibling tensions, generational expectations, or a long-standing rupture with a parent, this conversation offers powerful insight into how family systems operate, why we fall into certain roles, and how healing truly begins.
Note: As this was recorded live, the audio isn’t perfect — but the rawness adds to the realness!
You’ll hear real-life therapy sessions unfold in real time — including a moving segment on estrangement — revealing just how much our early environments impact our adult relationships, self-worth, and sense of belonging.
What we explore in this episode:
Why understanding the family system matters more than focusing on one person’s behaviour
How unresolved trauma can silently pass through generations
What happens when a family faces unexpected change
The difference between rupture and repair — and why both are inevitable
Why communication breaks down, and how to rebuild it with clarity and compassion
How to navigate the tension between love, resentment, and loyalty
With stories, therapeutic insight, and deeply human moments, this episode is for anyone trying to make sense of where they come from — and how to break free from cycles that no longer serve them.
Highlights:
01:57 – How families react to change
03:58 – Parenting under pressure
05:33 – Tools for breaking family patterns
21:31 – Live therapy: Joe’s estrangement story
36:17 – How revelations shape identity
43:15 – Compassion vs. resentment: finding the balance
48:32 – Q&A and closing reflections
Find out more about Curious Minds Festival: https://www.batharts.co.uk/curious-minds
This is a paid advertisement by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/therapyworks and get on your way to being your best self.
Please subscribe and leave a review—it truly makes all the difference! Follow Julia at @juliasamuelmbe for more insights, tips, and conversations on life's challenges and how to improve your mental well-being.
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In this episode, the Agony Aunties address a common concern among individuals in their mid-thirties who feel overwhelmed by life's big decisions, especially regarding having children. The discussion dismantles the false narrative of a linear path to success, emphasises the importance of self-awareness, and offers insights into managing societal pressures and personal expectations. The episode also touches on the significance of recognising real time boundaries for biological factors, broadening one's concept of family, cultivating curiosity about one's true desires, and the benefit of therapy in understanding personal choices.Please subscribe and leave a review—it truly makes all the difference!
Follow Julia at @juliasamuelmbe for more insights, tips, and conversations on life's challenges and how to improve your mental well-being.
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In this episode of the Therapy Works podcast, Amanda Wakeley, OBE, designer, creative director, and multiple award-winner, delves into the profound challenges she faced following the loss of her brother and the end of her eponymous fashion brand. Amanda shares the emotional impact of these significant losses, her process of grieving, and how a new chapter unfolded in her life. She talks about the therapeutic value of her new dog, the importance of nature, and the power of listening to one's gut instinct. Through introspection and resilience, Amanda navigated through her 'fertile void' and rediscovered her purpose, culminating in the launch of her own podcast and a forthcoming style DNA book. The conversation emphasizes the importance of vulnerability, courage, and the joy found in new beginnings.
00:38 Amanda's Career and Personal Losses
01:39 The Challenge of Sibling Loss
05:50 Fashion and Personal Identity
10:49 The Healing Power of Nature and Pets
22:48 The Emotional Toll of Business Closure
27:26 Cosy Work from Home and Meeting Luna
27:52 The Comfort of Cashmere
28:46 Defining Personal Style
30:15 Navigating Major Life Transitions
32:16 Starting a New Chapter with a Podcast
33:28 Dealing with Anxiety and Finding Control
34:01 The Healing Power of Nature and Movement
36:58 Hypnotherapy and Overcoming Fears
38:51 Grieving and Emotional Healing
46:07 Embracing New Beginnings and Wisdom
49:16 Final Reflections and Tribute to Charlie
Find Amanda:
Instagram: @amandawakeley
Website: amandawakeley.com
Podcast: Listen here
Links referenced in episode:
Eugene Gendlin on Focusing: https://focusing.org/sixsteps
Sibling Support: https://www.siblingsupport.co.uk/
Please subscribe and leave a review—it truly makes all the difference! Follow Julia at @juliasamuelmbe for more insights, tips, and conversations on life's challenges and how to improve your mental well-being.
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In this episode, the Agony Aunties address a listener's concern about feeling invisible in their mid-fifties due to ageism in both work and social spaces. Reflecting on their own experiences, the Agony Aunties discuss the psychological challenges and societal biases that come with aging, particularly for women. They emphasise the importance of valuing oneself, embracing inner strengths, and finding liberation in this new phase of life. They also touch upon the cultural obsession with anti-aging and all the benefits of reaching one's fifties. Please subscribe and leave a review—it truly makes all the difference!
Follow Julia at @juliasamuelmbe for more insights, tips, and conversations on life's challenges and how to improve your mental well-being.
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In this episode of the Therapy Works podcast, Olivia shares the harrowing experience of her husband being arrested in 2014 for downloading and sharing paedophilic images of children. She discusses the subsequent impact on her life and her four children, detailing the years of coercive control, emotional abuse, and manipulation she endured during her marriage. Olivia reflects on the therapy and support she received that helped her come to terms with the situation, reclaim her sense of self, and start to rebuild her life. Despite the trauma, Olivia speaks of her path to freedom, the crucial role of her support system, and how she managed to rebuild a life filled with joy and self-discovery.
00:12 The Day Everything Changed
01:22 Living Under Coercive Control
05:10 Realisations Through Therapy
10:19 The Arrest and Its Aftermath
14:14 Struggles with Shame and Guilt
31:30 Support Systems and Healing
37:46 Reflections and Moving Forward
Support Links & Further Resources
Understanding the Vagus Nerve – Learn more via the Polyvagal Institute
Carolyn Spring – Resources on trauma and recovery: carolynspring.com
Women’s Aid – Support for those affected by domestic abuse: womensaid.org.uk
Support for Families & Friends of Perpetrators – Guidance via the Survivors’ Network: Read here
Dr. Gwen Adshead: Reith Lecture – Listen on the BBC: Episode link
Please subscribe and leave a review—it truly makes all the difference! Follow Julia at @juliasamuelmbe for more insights, tips, and conversations on life's challenges and how to improve your mental well-being.
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In this episode, the Agony Aunties discuss the intense pressure and anxiety faced by a 16-year-old dealing with exam stress. They highlight the importance of timetables that include breaks and exercise, the benefits of studying with friends, and the significance of sleep, food, and exercise in reducing anxiety. Additionally, the conversation explores emotional coping mechanisms, the dangers of self-imposed pressure, the impact of comparing oneself to others, and the importance of recognising one's worth beyond academic performance. Real-life anecdotes and practical advice provide a comprehensive guide to managing stress and finding balance during exam periods.
Please subscribe and leave a review—it truly makes all the difference! Follow Julia at @juliasamuelmbe for more insights, tips, and conversations on life's challenges and how to improve your mental well-being.
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In this heartfelt and inspiring episode, Julia reconnects with world-famous light artist Chris Levine - best known for his portraits of the Queen, Kate Moss, and Elton John - for the first time in over a decade. Chris opens up about his personal battles, from growing up with a father struggling with alcoholism to facing his own challenges with addiction. He shares how these experiences shaped not only his journey of recovery, but also his unique creative path.
Together, they explore how meditation, energy, and a deep connection to a higher power have become central to both his healing and his art. Chris also talks about his fascination with sacred sites, cosmic energy, and the magic of light that continues to inspire his incredible work. This is an intimate and moving conversation about resilience, creativity, and finding peace through stillness.
02:31 The Impact of Addiction
06:04 Artistic Journey and Addiction
08:21 Recovery and Self-Realisation
11:24 Balancing Heart and Mind
17:44 The Role of Higher Power in Recovery
20:29 Expressing Through Art and Meditation
21:35 A Life-Changing Journey to Kathmandu
22:16 Discovering Vipassana Meditation
23:16 The Power of Stillness and Meditation
24:07 Creating Art Through Meditation
27:21 Manifesting Dreams and Serendipity
38:54 The Spiritual Significance of Sacred Sites
42:19 Reflections on Meditation and Creativity
Find out more about Chris Levine: https://chrislevine.com/
Please subscribe and leave a review—it truly makes all the difference! Follow Julia at @juliasamuelmbe for more insights, tips, and conversations on life's challenges and how to improve your mental well-being.
This is a paid advertisement by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/therapyworks and get on your way to being your best self.
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The Agony Aunties respond to a listener question about the difficulties of making, keeping, and spending time with friends, emphasising the importance of deep friendships in their life. They mention the challenges posed by frequent moves and busy schedules, particularly in the context of having children and seeking affordable, spacious homes. The speaker acknowledges that many people share this experience and struggle to maintain close connections with their supportive friends due to these factors.
Please subscribe and leave a review—it truly makes all the difference! Follow Julia at @juliasamuelmbe for more insights, tips, and conversations on life's challenges and how to improve your mental well-being.
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In this episode, Julia welcomes mother-daughter duo Doris and Athina to share their personal journey through Athina's struggle with anorexia. They describe how Athina developed the disorder during her teenage years amidst family and societal turmoil, leading to severe health issues and hospitalisation. They discuss the physical and psychological battles they faced, including the shame and denial associated with the illness and the relentless daily struggles of recovery. Doris highlights the importance of trusting parental instincts and maintaining a united front against the disorder, while Athina shares her journey toward acceptance, recovery, and ultimately, living a fuller life. The conversation emphasises the significance of early intervention, the power of professional support, and the enduring impact of family dynamics on recovery.
Support links for carers and advice:
New Maudsley Carers: https://newmaudsleycarers-kent.co.uk/about-us/
Beat Charity: https://www.beateatingdisorders.org.uk/
Please subscribe and leave a review—it truly makes all the difference! Follow Julia at @juliasamuelmbe for more insights, tips, and conversations on life's challenges and how to improve your mental well-being.
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In this episode, the Agony Aunties dive into a listener’s question about imposter syndrome. We open up about our own experiences of feeling undeserving or underqualified - even when the facts say otherwise - and unpack why so many of us carry these doubts. We explore how imposter syndrome often acts as a protective mechanism, and how reframing it can help shift the narrative.
From recognising emotional patterns to using stress reappraisal as a tool, we discuss ways to build self-trust, sit with discomfort, and see it as a sign of growth. This one’s all about giving yourself credit - even when your inner critic’s the loudest voice in the room.
Please subscribe and leave a review—it truly makes all the difference! Follow Julia at @juliasamuelmbe for more insights, tips, and conversations on life's challenges and how to improve your mental well-being.
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In this compelling and candid conversation, Julia sits down with her close friend Mariella Frostrup – renowned author, broadcaster, journalist and tireless campaigner – for a wide-ranging and deeply personal discussion on life, loss, and the pursuit of equity.
Mariella reflects on her remarkable career path, from the world of music PR to becoming one of the UK’s most recognisable voices in journalism and broadcasting. She opens up about the early trauma of losing her father, the resilience forged in childhood, and the enduring impact it’s had on her outlook.
Mariella shares what drives her advocacy for women’s rights – particularly around menopause and midlife. As the UK government’s menopause ambassador, she’s on a mission to tackle workplace inequality and challenge long-standing stigma around women's health.
This episode is a celebration of fighting spirit, friendship, and the power of using your voice – not just for yourself, but for the generations of women who follow.
00:50 Early Life and Formative Experiences
02:25 Challenges and Resilience
08:45 Fighting for Women's Rights
21:16 Menopause and Advocacy
25:10 The Norm of Curvy Career Paths
25:46 Menopause and Workplace Discrimination
26:34 Campaigning Challenges and Strategies
27:23 Personal Reflections on Campaigning
35:09 The Importance of Menopause Awareness
41:29 Personal Growth and Overcoming Adversity
45:06 Parenting and Childhood Reflections
Find Mariella:
Website: https://www.mariellafrostrup.com
Instagram: @mfrostrup
Buy her book 'Cracking the Menopause': https://amzn.eu/d/ftcAjjL
Please subscribe and leave a review—it truly makes all the difference! Follow Julia at @juliasamuelmbe for more insights, tips, and conversations on life's challenges and how to improve your mental well-being.
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In this episode, the Agony Aunties respond to a listener's question about feeling less valued than their younger half-brother by their stepmother. The listener shares experiences of unequal treatment and seeks advice on addressing these feelings without causing more tension. They discuss the challenges of adult children living at home, navigating complex family dynamics, and offer practical communication strategies. The episode emphasises the importance of being self-reflective and seeking supportive conversations both within and outside the family.
Please subscribe and leave a review—it truly makes all the difference! Follow Julia at @juliasamuelmbe for more insights, tips, and conversations on life's challenges and how to improve your mental well-being.
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In this powerful and very moving episode, Esther Ghey shares her story of unimaginable loss — the tragic murder of her daughter, Brianna Ghey, in February 2023. Speaking with grace and courage, Esther opens up about her grief journey, her ongoing campaign to improve mental health support for young people, and her mission to create safer online spaces through her charity, Peace and Mind UK.
Esther discusses the healing practices that have helped her, including mindfulness, meditation, and the transformative power of self-compassion. She also reflects on the complexities of Brianna’s life and the harsh realities young people face online today. One of the most striking moments in this conversation is Esther’s expression of empathy toward the mother of one of her daughter’s killers - a testament to her capacity for forgiveness and her commitment to peace over hatred.
Through her book, Under a Pink Sky, and her advocacy work, Esther is turning personal tragedy into meaningful change - and this conversation is a deeply emotional and inspiring reminder of the human capacity for compassion and hope.
Timestamps:
00:19 – The Tragic Loss of Brianna Ghey
01:07 – Coping with Grief and Mental Health
02:28 – Mindfulness and Self-Compassion
06:07 – Reflections on Personal Struggles
13:24 – Brianna’s Complex Personality
16:30 – The Impact of Social Media and Lockdown
19:52 – Family Struggles and Addiction
21:28 – The Dangers of Online Content
25:09 – Parental Challenges and Public Perception
27:12 – A Mother’s Compassion: Meeting the Killer’s Mother
27:55 – The Power of Forgiveness and Empathy
29:22 – Building Bridges: Friendship with Emma
31:24 – Restorative Justice and Letting Go of Hate
34:14 – Peace and Mind UK: A Legacy of Hope
37:32 – Cherry Blossoms and Pink Skies: Signs from Brianna
39:21 – Grief, Acceptance, and the Mystery of Afterlife
42:13 – Reflections on the Conversation with Emily and Sophie
Buy Esther's book: https://amzn.eu/d/b59YwyE
Support Peace and Mind UK: https://www.peaceandminduk.org/
Please subscribe and leave a review—it truly makes all the difference! Follow Julia at @juliasamuelmbe for more insights, tips, and conversations on life's challenges and how to improve your mental well-being.
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In this Agony Aunties episode, a listener writes in about the emotional challenges of caring for her mother who is starting to show signs of aging. The Agony Aunties discuss the delicate balance between providing help and respecting the parent's independence. They highlight the importance of having tender, collaborative conversations and preparing for the future. The discussion also touches on the emotional complexity of witnessing a parent's decline and offers practical advice for maintaining patience and understanding.
Please subscribe and leave a review—it truly makes all the difference! Follow Julia at @juliasamuelmbe for more insights, tips, and conversations on life's challenges and how to improve your mental well-being.
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In this powerful and deeply personal episode, award-winning broadcaster, journalist and author Emma Barnett opens up about the unseen struggles that have shaped both her personal and professional life.
Emma shares her journey with endometriosis and adenomyosis, the toll of chronic pain, and the emotional realities of going through IVF to have her children. Speaking with clarity, honesty and conviction, she dismantles taboos around women’s health and offers a nuanced perspective on the complexities of motherhood — one that goes far beyond picture-perfect expectations.
We also dive into her book Maternity Service, where Emma challenges outdated notions of maternity leave and reclaims the narrative of what it means to become a mother. This episode is a candid reflection on resilience, identity, and why the stories we don’t often tell are the ones that matter most.
01:02 Emma's Health Challenges
03:13 IVF Journey and Motherhood
05:50 Living with Pain and Finding Strength
08:28 Emma's Background and Upbringing
15:11 Professional Life and Broadcasting
20:26 Discussing the Book 'Maternity Service'
33:25 Losing and Gaining Yourself
33:43 Balancing Career and Home Life
34:00 The Importance of Flexibility
35:12 The 'Let Them' Movement
35:26 Influence and Relationships
38:50 Community and Support
45:46 Survival Strategies for Parents
49:07 Hope and Determination
54:24 Reflections on Motherhood
Find Emma:
Instagram: @emmabarnett
Buy her book, Maternity Service: https://amzn.eu/d/3C2izpu
Website: https://www.emmabarnett.org/
Please subscribe and leave a review—it truly makes all the difference! Follow Julia at @juliasamuelmbe for more insights, tips, and conversations on life's challenges and how to improve your mental well-being.
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In this episode, the Agony Aunties tackle a listener's question about dealing with the pain of family estrangement. They provide thoughtful advice, suggesting outreach to communities in similar situations, the therapeutic use of letters, and the importance of individual and family therapy. They emphasise the necessity of processing grief, managing obsessive thoughts, and finding personal agency in the face of unresolved trauma. Lastly, they acknowledge the listener's own emotional journey and encourage self-support during this challenging time.
Please subscribe and leave a review—it truly makes all the difference! Follow Julia at @juliasamuelmbe for more insights, tips, and conversations on life's challenges and how to improve your mental well-being.
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In this heartfelt episode of the Therapy Works podcast, Julia welcomes Lindsey Burrow, widow of rugby legend Rob Burrow. Lindsey discusses the challenges of coping with Rob's battle against motor neurone disease and life after his passing in June 2024. She opens up about dealing with anticipatory grief, the struggle of single parenthood, and maintaining a positive mindset. Lindsey also shares her ways of coping through exercise, the importance of communication, and the support she received from family and friends. Lindsey also sheds light on the role of unpaid carers, the importance of exercise and communication, and her efforts to continue Rob's legacy through fundraising for a specialist MND care centre and her upcoming book, 'Take Care,' which which focuses on love, resilience, and the power of family during adversity.
Buy Lindsey's book: https://amzn.eu/d/epJlLxi
Follow Lindsey on Instagram: @rob7lindsey
00:22 Lindsey Burrow's Story: Life with Rob Burrow
01:11 Greatest Challenges After Rob's Passing
03:03 Coping with Grief and Loss
04:25 Balancing Parenthood and Personal Grief
06:02 The Role of a Carer
15:44 Children's Grief and Resilience
29:10 Rob's Legacy and Future Plans
30:17 Writing the Book: A Therapeutic Journey
32:57 Final Thoughts
Please subscribe and leave a review—it truly makes all the difference! Follow Julia at @juliasamuelmbe for more insights, tips, and conversations on life's challenges and how to improve your mental well-being.
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