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Envy can arise wherever there exists inequality between people: in societies and families, between siblings, genders, and generations. “Envy is the tax which all distinction must pay” (R.W. Emerson). Envy has a bad reputation, at times even considered taboo, and yet still it proves to be ever-present. This episode explores the psychoanalytic understanding of envy and its implications for society and therapeutic processes, such as the phenomenon known as ‘negative therapeutic reaction.’ However, envy is not only destructive, but is also a driving force of human development.
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The idea of split personality is fertile ground for stories of great imagination—while regrettably also inspiring and perpetuating numerous misunderstandings that continue to cling to the kind of personality organization that we will take up in this episode.
*there is a small cultural variation in the episode. We use the German abbreviation "DIS" for Dissociative Identity Disorder. In English, however, the expression "DID" is common. We think that the episode is still easy to understand and hope you enjoy listening to it.
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In contrast to “black depression,” white depression denotes an often inconspicuous, insidious affliction that can last a lifetime. Its distinguishing quality is a feeling of meaninglessness and emptiness that is nearly impossible to grasp, even if everything in life actually appears to be working out and there is reason to be joyful. As if, despite all efforts, it was simply impossible to truly believe in anything at all, as if all love and enthusiasm were simply a stage play, acted out for others. What this is all about and where such feelings towards life can come from is the subject of this episode.
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“You’re free to do anything you want! But this man, of all people—you’ll never be happy with him.” Or: “Of course, if you don’t have time, you don’t have to come to the birthday dinner. But Uncle Henry will be very sad if you don’t. He was asking about you.” Or: “Yeah, yeah, I got it, independence is very important. But your own apartment, what’s the point? You can live with us, it’s much cheaper—and we’ll leave you alone.”
Sentences like this are likely to be familiar in every family. In some families, however, there is a system to this way of communicating. In this episode, we look at the so-called “family behind the rubber fence.” Generally unremarkable from the outside, while highly prone to conflict on the inside, the force binding these kinds of families together is nearly inescapable. In contrast to the “clan-family,” in which deviation is openly disapproved of and attacked, communications within the pseudo-community convey a subtle message of dependency, an intangible ban on separating and individuating oneself from the family: beyond the family, lies the threat of catastrophe. A violent clash ensues if any family member risks breaking away from the family, sometimes even lead-ing to illness.
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One couple fights over household responsibilities. Another is trapped in a cycle of jealousy and control. Still another strives for total harmony and oneness—only to be tormented by intense anxiety the moment small differences arise. With the help of the famous psychodynamic concept of collusion, this episode deals with the often conflictual relations between couples. We often encounter in romantic relationships the contours of our unconscious longings and fears, factors that are anchored in our personal history and that are decisive in the selection of a partner. Topics include: the relationship dynamics of jealousy, narcissistic relationship dynamics, as well as helper dynamics.
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Addiction is one of the most widespread forms of mental illness. However, it is also burdened with many stigmas, and those suffering from it are often stigmatized. Treating it is considered difficult. But why do people become addicted? Can anyone become an addict? What is the psychological function of addictive behavior? This episode is an introduction to the psychoanalytic understanding of addictive disorders, focusing especially on the unconscious dynamics of shame and guilt.
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“You are what you eat.” We are continuously negotiating our identity through food, setting the boundaries of the self. Inscribed into the symptoms of anorexia is an unconscious conflict of identity, which has something to do with one’s own longings and cravings, with a hunger for the other. In psychodynamic therapies, these longings become part of the therapeutic exchange, while also leading to a characteristic dilemma.
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History has certainly never failed to offer reasons and occasions to cause violence of all sorts; making it understandable how Freud arrived at the following verdict towards the end of his life: “Homo homini lupus—man is wolf to man. Who in the face of all his experience of life and of history, will have the courage to dispute this assertion?”
One form of violence in particular has played an especially sinister role, at least in recent history and continuing up to the present: the destructive power of narcissistic hatred.
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The diagnosis of “narcissism” appears to have come into vogue, not only in the field of clinical psychology. It is an inescapable diagnosis for just about any critique of contemporary society. But what exactly are we talking about when we talk of narcissism? How do such diagnoses of our times relate to the clinical and psychoanalytical understanding of narcissism?
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Grief is one of life’s inevitable experiences, for we live in a world that is fleeting. Processing loss is one of the most difficult mental processes and yet every human being must face it. Some mourning processes are so severe that they lead to mental illnesses. This episode deals with the various phenomena and nuances of mourning and how therapy can accompany this process.
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After the previous phases of therapy, in which Alex’s symptoms and later his own life story took center stage, the outbreak of the Corona crisis sends the therapeutic work into turmoil. Fears of infection, but also alleged “conspiracy theories” confine the therapeutic space and raise questions. These become, at the same time, the starting point for uncovering the transgenerational entanglements. Alex explores the traumatic history of his family and finds not only a demon, still carrying out his nefarious deeds, but also a key to his origins and identity.
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Alex, a man in his mid-thirties, comes to therapy with psychosomatic symptoms and anxiety attacks, for which initially there appears to be no explanation. In the first phase of therapy, this often first involves finding words for his own feelings and sorting out the inner chaos. In the meantime, an intensive therapeutic process has begun, over the course of which Alex gradually comes to accept his life story as his own. This guides the therapeutic conversation back to events during the collapse of the Soviet Union and the family’s emigration to Germany in the early 1990s. Only gradually does it become clear what far-reaching consequences this upheaval had for Alex—and how this story continues to have an impact on him and his psychological suffering to this day.
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This case study is about Alex, a man in his mid-thirties, who spent over four years in analysis, most of that time with three sessions a week. Alex came into therapy with psychosomatic symptoms and anxiety attacks for which there appeared to be no explanation. The story of therapy describes the development of mental space in which emotional meaning gradually emerges, thoughts and feelings connect, and inner chaos is organized. This is a delicate process, for an ominous light falls on the family history, even affecting Alex’s spirit, darkening his life for many years. The case history that also touches on the traumatic history of Europe and Russia, a history that casts its generational shadow on us to this day.
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See also our episode on transgenerational transmission of trauma: https://psy-cast.org/en/episode-21-the-long-shadow-of-trauma-transgenerational-transmission/
All case histories and details named have been published only with the personal consent of those involved and have been modified to render them completely anonymous, so that inference to any real person is not possible; or examples have been invented and are fictional. Possible overlaps with any real persons are therefore coincidental.
**Help in mental crises**: If you are in a mental health crisis, look for help in your local area and reach out to professionals. Many countries also have national programs.If you are not well, please decide for yourself if you want to listen to this podcast episode. This episode is about panic attacks, anxiety and transgenerational trauma. -
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Attachment, love, always goes hand in hand with losses—thus happiness and sadness are also close relatives. In this episode we will hear more about why separation and loss not only mean suffering, but also play an important role for psychological development.
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Psychoanalysis is often equated with the work of Sigmund Freud. Contemporary modes of thought and therapeutic approaches such as relational psychoanalysis or mentalization-based therapy methods are often less well known, despite being central to current practice. This episode provides an introduction to the concepts of contemporary psychoanalysis.
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Conspiracy phantasma derive their power from affects, not from arguments. They cannot be understood by differentiating them from some supposedly reasonable normality – for normality may not be so reasonable after all – but only in the reflection of their affective cohesiveness.
In fact, they are a social psychological phenomenon of extraordinary proportions: and a case for depth psychology. In this episode we will hear more about the role conspiracy theories can play for the psyche and why they cannot be easily abandoned.
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“The school of C.G. Jung has played a controversial role in psychoanalysis. More than almost any other psychological school, it grants a greater role to the symbolic world of the psyche, fairy tales, myths, and legends, but also alchemy or astrology. The significance of this spiritual reality is expressed at life-historical thresholds and in crisis situations, but also in anger over the lousy ending of a television series. Also reflected in the controversy surrounding C.G. Jung is an old conflict between enlightenment and myth.”
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“A trauma does not disappear through silence; it cannot be silenced out of existence. It remains effective in fantasies, dreams, and experiences, but eludes language and thus understanding. It only becomes more diffuse, more intangible; it becomes a shadow or an undead, casting an invisible spell over the family history... But how do you break a spell?”
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“It is important to emphasize that in every victim of trauma there is a desire for vitality and healing. Consciously and unconsciously, the injured psyche tries to understand what has happened, to mitigate the destructiveness, and to reintegrate it into one’s own identity.”
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