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Katie and Bridget go to the Coco Bongo Club as they re-watch a very nostalgic movie: The Mask! Come along to Edge City (DON'T WORRY THIS MOVIE IS RATED PG!) where we meet Stanley Ipkiss, a grown man with stable income, a loving dog, and nice housing who is considered a "loser" because he "can't get a date"... Yup, what a loser! When he finds a mask floating in the city's toxic river he puts it on only to then transform into a chaotic cartoon character of a horny man. You thought that was crazy? Don't worry, we've also got the mob in this PG movie! Led by gangster Dorian who's out to rob banks, murder people, and possibly blow up his girlfriend Tina as well as his club (?). When Stanley's shenanigans get him wrapped up in all things felonies, it's up to The Mask (and arguably his dog Milo - who deserves a Dog-Oscar/Doscar) to save the day! Will Stanley be able to avoid jail time and get to make out with Tina? Is he also Cuban Pete, the king of the Rumba Beat!? Where he plays the maracas and goes Chick-Chicky-Boom Chick-Chicky-Boom!?! Released in 1994, it stars Jim Carrey, Cameron Diaz, Peter Riegert, Peter Greene, Amy Yasbeck, and Richard Jeni.
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Katie and Bridget do a blood pact as they re-watch the movie: Practical Magic! It's a story about love, loss, witches, possibly vampires, FBI investigations, tequila, gardening, sisterhood... Honestly, the list goes on and on for this plot-packed movie. Come along as we meet sisters Sally and Gillian, two witches that get to live with their kooky aunts when their parents both die! Thanks Death Beetle! When they grow up they experience love and loss - one through the actual definition of that sentiment, while the other may or may not have been hypnotized by Dracula and subsequently held hostage by him. When they kill him/it, plot #57 takes place where they attempt to cover up the murder that ended up not really being a murder because then a couple scenes later there's a possession... And also an exorcism... AND ALSO ANOTHER LOVE STORY! ...Guys, this movie's got a lot going on okay!? Released in 1998, it stars Sandra Bullock, Nicole Kidman, Stockard Channing, Dianne Wiest, Goran Visnjic, and Aidan Quinn.
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Katie and Bridget get lost in the jungle as they re-watch the 80's movie: Predator! Come along as we follow a bunch of muscled, sweaty men (not Magic Mikes, unfortunately) who are traveling through the jungle in search of saving some hostages. What they don't know is that they are being hunted by an invisible being. Spoiler alert: it's the mofo Predator! When the men start getting killed off one by one they resort to blowing everything up, destroying the local ecosystem - via blowing everything up, and continuing to shoot guns even when their arms are blown off. But all that fails because what they really needed was mud! ...Just some mud! We've got Arnolds! We've got gratuitous violence! We've got Microsoft Paint CGI! We've even got a Predator that laughs at the end because why the fuck not! Released in 1987, it stars a cast of characters played by Arnold Schwarzenegger, Carl Weathers, Elpidia Carrillo, Bill Duke, Jesse Ventura, Sonny Landham, Richard Chaves, and Shane Black.
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Katie and Bridget go and plant some flowers (since this movie doesn't have any) as they re-watch: Garden State! It's a movie that checks all the quirky bingo boxes INCLUDING having your star be Zach Braff! Come along as we meet Andrew, an emotionally stunted man who is traveling back to his home state of New Jersey for his paraplegic Mother's funeral! Oh did we mention that he had accidently caused his Mom's paraplegia? By pushing her when he was 9 years old and she accidently hit her neck? Then his Dad (who's also his psychiatrist) decided to send him away for years and years to boarding schools so they didn't have to live with him anymore? ...Yeah it's all kind of messed up! But when Andrew meets Sam, a woman who does not have brain damage but does have a pet semetary in her backyard, he discovers what it means to truly feel things again! Released in 2004, it was written and directed by Zach Braff who stars alongside Natalie Portman, Peter Sarsgaard, and Ian Holm.
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Katie and Bridget hire Quint from Jaws to keep watch over their surfing competition as they re-watch the inspirational movie: Soul Surfer! Based on the true story of Bethany Hamilton, who had her left arm bitten off by a shark while surfing and lived to tell the tale. Bethany's a competitive pre-teen who gets right back into surfing after her accident, but realizes that her life won't ever be the same. With the support of her parents - who may or may not be secret billionaires - she works towards getting herself back to competitive surfing with some strategic planning and lots of training. There's also Carrie Underwood... She's there too... Boy, she tries... Anyway! Will Bethany learn to reclaim all the surfing glory she once had? Is "wangle" a new word that we now will be using in our everyday vocabulary!? Released in 2011, it stars AnnaSophia Robb, Helen Hunt, Dennis Quaid, Carrie Underwood, Kevin Sorbo, and Lorraine Nicholson.
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Katie and Bridget enter a surf contest where everybody dies as they re-watch the movie: Blue Crush! It's a movie all about how hard work and perseverance will help you win the surfing contest... Even though our main character ABANDONS hard work to hook up with a random man and LOSES the surfing competition but still gets herself on the front cover of surfing magazine! ....!?!?!?? Listen, this movie clearly hit it's head on the reef, okay!? Come along as we meet Anne Marie, a pro hoe who yes, forgets about training for a surf competition because she meets a pro football player who gives her attention. Along with her friends Eden and Lena, they all work towards earning a living and helping to raise Anne Marie's younger sister Penny, a 12 year old who binge drinks on weekdays. Will Anne Marie be able to refocus and get her life back together before the tournament? Did the editor of this movie snort WAYY too much cocaine while working on it!? Released in 2002, it stars Kate Bosworth, Michelle Rodriguez, Matthew Davis, Sanoe Lake, Mika Boorem, and Faizon Love.
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Katie and Bridget break whales out of captivity as they re-watch the 90's movie: Free Willy! It's a story all about how unconditional love for an orphan and/or a kidnapped orca will lead to wholesome moments AND iconic Michael Jackson songs! Come along as we meet Jessie, an orphan who hates everyone and everything, except for his new bff Willy the killer whale. When Jessie gets a 12 year old job at the adventure park where Willy lives, they form a bond centered around shared trauma, fish, and angst. After Jessie discovers that the owners of the park are going to try to kill Willy for insurance money (this is apparently a real thing!!!), it's up to him and his adult friends to help bust Willy out and return him to his family - who have straight up just been living in ocean like ten feet away from the park this entire time. Will Willy be able to jump the jetty and make it back to his family in time? Did this movie actually shoot a giant mechanical whale over a child actor to get their money shot!? Released in 1993, it stars Jason James Richter, Lori Petty, Michael Madsen, Jayne Atkinson, August Schellenberg, and Michael Ironside.
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Katie and Bridget go surfing then sky diving then rob a bank as they re-watch the 90's action thriller: Point Break! Come along as we meet Johnny Utah (not a porn star), who begins working for the FBI in California. When he takes on a case looking to catch serial bank robbers (who are suspected surfers), he gets himself in the waves and drinking the surfing Kool-Aid. Along the way he meets Tyler, a woman who really should have just ran away from him and all the other dudes in this movie as FAST AS POSSIBLE. While she teaches him how to surf and not die, he also meets his possible 2nd love interest Bodhi, an adrenaline junkie who likes to stare at Johnny longingly - especially in the rain! When Johnny discovers that his throuple lover Bodhi is the lead bank robber the chase is on to end the chaos and not die. Seriously, there are lots of deaths in this ridiculous movie. Released in 1991, it stars Keanu Reeves, Patrick Swayze, Lori Petty, Gary Busey, and John C. McGinley.
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Katie and Bridget become fishermen as they re-watch the 90's slasher: I Know What You Did Last Summer! It's a movie all about how if you accidentally murder someone and try to cover it up, you will get pranked a year later and possibly everyone around you will die! ...Seriously guys just call the police next time, okay? Come along as we meet friends: Julie, a sassy girl who probs has depression, her best friend Helen, a pageant queen who gets to sit in a clam in a parade (??), her boyfriend Ray, a guy who grew up to be a fisherman AND THERE'S NOTHING WRONG WITH THAT, and Helen's boyfriend Barry, a guy who is most def taking steroids. They are on the hunt to figure out who is sending them incriminating messages about their cover-up murder via yearbooks, bothering the locals, and not telling their parents or the police. We've got dead people, crabs, and a possible professional cleaner and/or magician as our killer in this Scary Movie inspired throwback. Released in 1997, it was written by Kevin Williamson and features Jennifer Love Hewitt, Sarah Michelle Gellar, Freddie Prinze Jr., Ryan Phillippe, Anne Heche, Johnny Galecki, Bridgette Wilson-Sampras, and Muse Watson.
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Katie and Bridget sit outside in lawn chairs on a hot summers night in the middle of nowhere (no actually, this is how they recorded the episode) as they rewatch the rom-com: Elizabethtown! It's a movie all about how road trips can be fun, family can be loud, and meet-cutes can result in 24+ hour phone calls... Oh it's also about grieving with death and finding meaning in life again... Rom Com! Come along as we meet Drew, a failed shoe designer who lost his company 1 billion dollars. When he decides to Rube Goldberg himself a death machine to die, he gets a call that lol his Dad actually has died first and now HE has to go to Kentucky to deal with it. On the way he meets Claire, a peppy (but not cheerleader peppy) flight attendant who may or may not turn into his stalker. Over the next couple of days Drew learns what it means to truly live and how to appreciate the crazy - a lesson we all probably need! Buckle up for random celeb characters (HI PAULA DEAN), a playlist that will be added to my Spotify ASAP, and Rusty - the guy who trains your kids to be good via VHS tape by blowing up a building. That is not a joke that really happens! Released in 2005, it was written and directed by Cameron Crowe and features Orlando Bloom, Kirsten Dunst, Susan Sarandon, Alec Baldwin, Judy Greer, Jessica Biel, and Paul Schneider.
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Katie and Bridget start a business (that they label as just a club) as they re-watch the 90's movie: The Baby-Sitters Club! Come along as we meet all of the 10-13 year old girls of the for-profit Baby-Sitters Club - BSC for short. We've got Kristy, the leader of the club, who has to deal with her absentee father attempting to come back into her life and RUIN it UGH; Mary Anne, the girl who does dress like an old lady and probably should dump her red flag of a boyfriend Logan; Dawn, who likes to pick up trash and may or may not be Bridget; Claudia, the girl who failed science and has to attend summer school and maybe it was because the girls keep having meetings in her room preventing her from studying(!?); Stacey, the girl with diabetes who thinks that's the biggest problem in her life, instead of, you know, attempting to date a child predator; and then Mallory and Jessi... They're the other ones! One magical summer teaches these girls that friendship is truly magic... As well as teaches them when we should all call the police! Released in 1995, it stars Schuyler Fisk, Bre Blair, Rachael Leigh Cook, Larisa Oleynik, Tricia Joe, Stacy Linn Ramsower, Zelda Harris, and Ellen Burstyn.
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Katie and Bridget HOST A 2ND AWARDS SHOW!? It's our 200th episode and we're celebrating all of the past 100 movies we've reviewed over the last two years - since our premiere of The Sissy Awards! Come listen to see who gives us the biggest ick, who we all slow clap for, and which movie we think should have been made into a theme park ride. Who will go home victorious and who will go home crying? It's time to get nostalgic about our movie nostalgia!
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Katie and Bridget put on their bow-ties as they re-watch the surprisingly heart-felt, dark comedy: Problem Child! It's a story all about an evil child! ...Well actually he has a tragic backstory that most likely led to his behaviors... And also he's never had an adult support him or like him... And he got abandoned every 2 seconds in his life and everybody bullies him... Should this movie instead have been called "Problem Adults To This Child"!? Come along as we meet Junior, a rambunctious orphan who gets adopted by Ben and Flo - yes that is a real woman's name in this movie. Ben has always wanted to be a Dad and is Junior's number 1 supporter. Flo just wanted to get invited to kids birthday parties because apparently she has no friends....!?!?!?!? When Junior retaliates against scary clown rooms, jerky neighbors, and bullies (as well as inviting a serial killer to his house LOL REALLY), Ben must decide if Junior is worth keeping or bringing back to the orphanage... Spoiler alert: Ben's the only decent adult in this movie so he OBVIOUSLY doesn't take Junior back to the orphanage and instead he takes a bullet for Junior - LITERALLY. Released in 1990, it stared John Ritter (respect), Michael Oliver, Jack Warden, Gilbert Gottfried, Amy Yasbeck, and Michael Richards.
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Katie and Bridget go back to the dino island (but not the SAME dino island) as they re-watch the lackluster sequel: The Lost World: Jurassic Park! Hey remember how the first Jurassic Park taught us to fear dinosaurs and never interact with them because man vs. nature blah blah? Well guess what - we're gonna go interact with them cause we forgot about all the death and destruction and instead are like YAY DINOS! Come along with Ian Malcolm, the only returning main character from the first movie! Through some spared-no-expense nonsense ala John Hammond, Ian ends up back with the dinos to go rescue his girlfriend who's been camping there alone for 4 days... Yes that's right, camping alone with DINOS... For four days... She might not have even had a tent, we're not really sure! But it's okay because we have some new characters like Nick Van Owen, the alleged back up plan (but we have doubts), Eddie Carr, the tech guy who gets viscously murdered, Kelly, a step-daughter who should have just stayed in the High-Hide, and InGen people, who just could not care less that they are seeing dinosaurs in real life. With that set up how could you go wrong!? Released in 1997, it was once again directed by Steven Spielberg, and features Jeff Goldblum, Julianne Moore, Pete Postlethwaite, Vince Vaughn, Arliss Howard, Richard Attenborough, Vanessa Chester, and Richard Schiff.
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Katie and Bridget go to a random house party as they re-watch the movie: Superbad! It's a story all about how your friendship may be tested when there's alcohol, girls, impending college, and possibly a secret gay crush on one another that you are repressing because you were written by a 14 year old boy... (we said what we said)! Come along as we meet Seth, a dick-drawing senior who is willing to do anything to impress party-throwing Jules! He's best friends with Evan, a non dick-drawing guy on his way to Dartmouth next year who is looking to woo Becca. When the two of them commit to buying alcohol for the big end of the year party to impress the girls, they quickly fall into law-breaking shenanigans! Don't forget about McLovin, the fake ID friend who has his own personal discovery with the help of two very bored police officers. Will the guys both get laid before they go off to college? LOL NOPE ONLY MCLOVIN DID TECHNICALLY - AND IT'S THE BEST ENDING! Released in 2007, it was written by Seth Rogan and his friend Evan Goldberg when they were 14 years old and stars a cast of characters including: Jonah Hill, Michael Cera, Christopher Mintz-Plasse, Bill Hader, Seth Rogen, Emma Stone, and Joe Lo Truglio.
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Katie and Bridget get back on the island as they play Season 2 of Nostalgic Movie Survivor! 18 nostalgic movie characters (all ones from movies we've reviewed!) are placed on an island and set out to compete to become the ultimate Survivor! Alliances are formed, challenges are faced, with lots of twists and turns along the way. We can guarantee you that you'll NEVER be able to guess who ends up naked on the island AND who ends up being the final winner - mainly because neither of us saw it coming either! Based on the hit reality series Survivor, enjoy our journey of figuring out who would Outwit, Outplay, and Outlast!
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Katie and surrogate sisters Eric and Neil from The Retro Video Store Podcast scale a snake tower as they re-watch Neil's favorite movie: Conan The Barbarian! And just so we're clear, this is the 80's Conan - NOT the 2011 one (Eric and Neil will rant and rave if you mention it)! Come along as we meet Conan, the nicest barbarian you've ever met, who spends his life seeking the ultimate revenge against Thulsa Doom - aka James Earl Jones in a fabulous wig. When Thulsa kills Conan's family and sets him on a course to endure Wheels of Pain, breeding, and other shit, Conan sets out to kill snakes and disassemble religious cults! Along the way he gets a gaggle of friends including Subotai, a best friend who WILL cry for Conan, Valeria, NOT Valkyrie like Katie keeps mistakingly saying in this episode, and the Wizard, who does eventually do magic but mainly he's just there to narrate. Will Conan be able to seek his revenge and learn his purpose? Will Neil recite this movie word for word!? Released in 1982, it was based on the novels written by Robert E. Howard and features Arnold Schwarzenegger, James Earl Jones, Max von Sydow, Sandahl Bergman, Mako, and Gerry Lopez.
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Katie and special guest/surrogate sister JEN-A go deliver a baby as they re-watch the movie: Knocked Up! It's a nostalgic movie for them where they reminisce about endless quotes, former roommates, and their epic college beer pong table - complete with "Julie's Temple"! Okay but the movie itself is a journey alllll it's own! Come along as we meet Alison, a we-don't-know-how-old successful woman who drunkenly gets knocked up Ben, a 23 year old who apparently doesn't know how to put on a condom... And doesn't have a job... And smokes weed everyday... And doesn't pay taxes... Yeah spoiler alert: They do end up together LOL. With the help of Alison's sister Debbie and her husband Pete (and possibly with the help of Spiderman 3!), they discover what it means to grow up and become parents. We've got everything from smoshsmorsions to Googling murder in this time capsule of a movie! Released in 2007, it was written and directed by Judd Apatow and features an insane cast with Katherine Heigl, Seth Rogen, Leslie Mann, Paul Rudd, Jason Segel, Jay Baruchel, Jonah Hill, Martin Starr, Harold Ramis, Alan Tudyk, Bill Hader, and Kristen Wiig - JUST TO NAME A FEW!
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Katie and special guest/surrogate sister Mel cheers over severed penises as they re-watch the cult classic: Teeth! It's a movie all about how purity ring cults not only ruin things like the Jonas Brothers, but they also may or may not cause teeth to develop in your vagina... Or something like that! Meet Dawn, a high school cult leader who truly believes "Love Is Worth Waiting For" (buy the song on iTunes). When she meets Toby, a knock-off Adam Brody, she quickly discovers that some love ain't worth waiting for - especially when its experienced forcefully in a creepy cave! Unbeknownst to her, there's something inside of her (NOT THE SERPENT) which has no problem biting back against sexual assaulters. Dawn goes on a journey of self-discovery, sexual awakening, and murder - lots and lots of murder. Watch as this not a girl not yet a woman rampages through town with her vagina! Released in 2007, it was written and directed by Mitchell Lichtenstein
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Katie and special guest/surrogate sister Christine murder without consequences as they rewatch: The Purge! It's a movie all about how in the future/past (since this takes place in 2022 LOL) all crime is legal one day of the year to help people "Release The Beast" #redbull. When an affluent family's young, possibly future serial killer son, lets in a "Bloody Stranger" during their lockdown, a gang of nepo-babies come in to destroy their trash security systems and reek havoc! This movie asks many ethical questions such as: Would you really let a stranger die on the street if you could instead save them? Would you instead throw your son out onto the street for letting that person in? Would you reenact Scooby-Doo with your family if your home was being invaded and be all split up? And - would you too wear business casual the entire day/night of the Purge!? Seriously why did they do that!? Released in 2013, it was written and directed by James DeMonaco and features Ethan Hawke, Lena Headey, Max Burkholder, and Adelaide Kane.
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