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Finally, the long-awaited reboot of The Crow is here! Can the guy who played Pennywise live up to Brandon Lee's iconic role? The trailers didn't look promising, as they seemed to have swapped out fun goth for emo goth, but maybe that could work! Perhaps the new focus on The Crow's actual love interest, played by FKA twigs, would give a much-needed perspective shift in what is usually a gross and gory murder fest. Smear that tattoo ink below your eyes, put on your headphones, and find out if this movie actually deserved to become a box office bomb.
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Did you know two horror movies with the same premise and name were released two years apart? That's right, Speak No Evil, whose trailer has greeted movie theaters for most of 2024, was based on a Danish film of the same name. We had to know what changes were made between the two, so naturally, we watched two halves of the movie each! So, we know the whole story regardless of whether it was intended for a European or American audience. This is easily our longest podcast yet, but you get the plot of two movies for the price of one podcast! What a deal.
Honestly, we had a fantastic time recording this, and maybe we'll do it again in the future. I hope you enjoy it, listener!
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We're out of the Halloween months, but that doesn't mean the horror has to stop. This week, we combine horror with our other love, Pinocchio. That's right, we're watching Pinocho's Revenge! What if Pinocchio was evil and told people to kill? What's fascinating is we thought this would be one of the worst films we've seen in a while, but they're actually cooking some gas. It may not be Hank Hill approved, but there's more under the surface than other films that turn childhood characters into horrific monsters. Be sure to listen to our other Pinocchio episodes as well!
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In a mouthful of a movie title, Micheal Myers is back in Halloween H2O: 20 Years Later! Laurie now has a son, played by Josh Hartnett, and he just wants to live a normal life and hang out with his girlfriend at his private school. His mom, him, and a group of other students stay on campus when the rest of the school goes on a trip to Yosemite. Of course, this is the perfect time for a killer to strike! Why did he wait 20 years to return and exact his revenge? Tune in to find out!
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What's a better movie to add to the Spooktacular list than a movie about a haunted pool? Night Swim follows a family who just recently bought a house with a brand-new pool. The dad is suffering from MS, but with the miracle of swimming, his disease is basically gone! But then scary things start happening. Creepy dudes start appearing in the water, scaring the two children of the family. Will the children be able to alert their family to the dangers of swimming without a lifeguard?
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This Spooktacular season continues with another recommended, so bad it's a good movie, Cathy's Curse. Her dad's dead sister curses poor little Cathy, I think? This movie's motivations are also a mess plus goofy production issues. For example, an old man tries barging into a door, and the actor accidentally opens the door and closes it to try again. The cut is left in the film! This cheap exorcist knockoff does try and do its own thing, but it still has some of the strangest line readings in all cinema.
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The Spooktacular season continues with a mouthful of a title: Hello Mary Lou: Prom Night II. This Canadian horror film is a sequel to Prom Night in name only. It follows the wonderfully evil Mary Lou as she possesses a teenager to acquire the title of prom queen. It's the most '80s slasher flick we've seen in a while. It checks all the corny boxes you'd want and has pretty shockingly solid visual effects!
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The Spooktacular season returns with The Watchers. It's time for M Night Shyamalan's daughter, Ishana, to direct a movie featuring Dakota Fanning! Would she craft her horror style, or will it fall into the same trappings as her father? The movie revolves around a forest in Ireland where no one can escape. Yet the watchers are always observing the people inside of a box every single night. Who are they, and what do they want? And most importantly, will there be a major twist?!
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We close out Streisand on the Beach with Honeybees returning for another episode, and this one is a bit of a pivot! The Guilt Trip stars Seth Rogan and Streisand as his overbearing mom. This is the last film she starred in, and it's a bit of an odd choice when it's a comedy. Seth Rogan is a chemist who invented a new cleaning product while his mom was there to support him along his long road trip. Maybe along the way, she'll eat a ton of food and potentially fall in love.
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No other movie we've watched for Streisand on the Beach was on the Criterion channel until Funny Girl! This is the big movie. Streisand's breakout moment. She stars as a woman who wants to be a singer and a comedian! But back in the '20s, women were only supposed to look a certain way and be pretty. She does it, though, with the help of her friend and potential lover, Omar Sharif. I don't feel like I'm selling you on this movie, but Barbera has unbelievable charisma in this movie, which is impossible to describe.
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We're continuing Streisand on the Beach with the hit musical flop Hello Dolly! This movie had a massive budget and barely made any money at all. But is it just because musicals were falling out of fashion? Or was it because maybe the movie itself isn't noteworthy? Most importantly, we want to find out if Barbera was the problem or the solution to this movie.
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We're starting a very special month to end summer Streisand on the Beach, where we have an entire month of Barbera Streisand movies, starting with the film she wrote, starred in, and directed, Yentl. NotTheHoneyBees joins us to help guide us through this month of chaos. As the lore keeper of all things Barbera, they put together a stellar list of films we can't wait to watch. Also, how did no one discover that Yentl was not a boy about 20 minutes into the movie?
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We bring Summer Screaming to a close with Lake Placid. It's a movie about a giant crocodile that made it to Maine. It's a miracle of nature! But it did kill some people, so maybe they should kill it. Or capture it to study it! Either way, this weird little cast of characters will all come together and deal with the aftermath of what Betty White has caused. Yes, that's right, Betty White and crocodiles. How could this movie not kick ass?
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Let's watch a classic summer horror movie from the 1970s: Piranha!! Just how did these Piranhas make it all the way to the States? This movie says, "Don't worry about it. We know what you want to see: bodies of water turning red!" We certainly didn't expect a cool little animated fish man created by Phil Tippett walking around a scientist's lab for no reason. This is a classic Other Half episode where Ethan calls the main protagonist by a side character's name for almost his entire half.
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The Meg is here to continue our train of summer-vibe horror movies! Jason Statham stars in this massive blockbuster hit from 2018. Some people are here just to watch big sharks eat things, and nothing is bigger than a Megladon. Is this blockbuster worth the hype? Or is it just more chum that Hollywood is releasing to the masses?
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The Final Girls kick off our month of Summer Screaming! In August, we're talking about horror movies with summer vibes. What's more summer than a summer camp of horror? The Final Girls is a meta-commentary of the horror movie genre, specifically the final girl trope. Five unsuspecting filmgoers are sucked into a campy horror movie they're watching. What makes it more complicated is that our protagonist's mom plays one of the characters in the movie. She, of course, has no memory of being her mom; she just wants to get laid at camp! Despite being a comedy, this movie has a surprisingly heart-felt story at the center of it. The reason why this is may surprise you.
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The cover and the trailer seem quirky, but Blow Dry is a serious movie about a silly hair-styling competition. Alan Rickman stars as Phil, a distant dad to Josh Hartnett, who looks like he's from Dumb and Dumber. He returns to town for a massive hair competition that his ex-wife Shelly, played by the late Natasha Richardson, is entering. Shelly faces fierce rivalry from Bill Neighy, who has a daughter played by Rachael Leigh Cook. He wants to win, so he plays dirty! Also, Shelly previously ran away from her marriage with Phil to be with her hair model, Sandra. What shenanigans! Oh, but Shelly has cancer, and that's no laughing matter.
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Kate and Leopold asks the question, can a working woman find love with her ex-boyfriend's great-grandpa? Kate & Leopold is a romantic comedy directed by James Mangold, starring Meg Ryan and Hugh Jackman in the titular roles. There's also Liev Schreiber. It's Wolverine and Sabertooth if they were somehow related. Leopold gets sent from 19th century New York and is placed in modern-day New York and sees just how poorly Kate is treated in the modern day. Shennanigans of course ensue. The biggest offense is who toasts their butter twice?
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Clifford's basic premise is, what if PeeWee Herman was a horrible gaslighting monster? Clifford is a comedy film starring Martin Short as the main character, a 10-year-old named Clifford Daniels. Despite being 40 years old while filming, Martin Short said age is just a number and went for it! Clifford needs to go to Dinosaur World. Clifford's relentless schemes to get to Dinosaur World drives Martin, his uncle, to insanity. All because Martin wants to impress his lady friend.
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FLASH! UUUUHHHH! It's time to watch pivotal Sci-Fi movie Flash Gordon! For better or for worse, they don't make them like they used to. Much to Ethan's surprise, Flash Gordon doesn't have any super powers. He just happens to be in space from Earth! That's wild. Did you know they based Star Wars off of this stuff?!
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