Failed Critics Film Podcast

Failed Critics Film Podcast

United States

The slightly shambolic weekly film podcast, where each week we review new theatrical releases, as well as revisit some classics (and not-so-classics), trawl through film news, and maybe even chat to the odd special guest.

Episodes

Character Unlock: A Bitter (Virtual) Reality  

It's Valentine's Day! OK, it was Valentine's day when we recorded... What better way to spend your time than with the consoles that you love so much and the games that make you feel good about yourself? How about spending a couple of hours talking about those things with your mates? Welcome to this week's Character Unlock podcast. Fresh off the back of the last jam packed episode, hosts John Miller and Andrew Brooker spend a bit of time digging into the news from the last week or so. From Call of Duty going back to its roots and what that might mean for the series, to the insanity that is selling public access tickets for E3; the lads kill a bit of time wondering about the point of it all before heading to a marathon session talking about the games they've been playing. As John continues his mission to finish the Mass Effect series for the 132nd time in preparation for the new game, Brooker has to justify spending a small fortune on a PlayStation VR completely on a whim by playing almost everything made for the thing in a very short space of time. What was worth playing? What made him so sick that it completely ruined his day? All that and more as a featureless episode ends with the guys talking nonsense for more than may be healthy as the bitter pair let everything off their chest. Come back and join us for more of the same in the next episode in a couple of weeks. If you want more from us in the mean time, come find us on Twitter, on Facebook (@CharacterUnlock), and guesting on the recent Resident Evil based Failed Critics film podcast.

Failed Critics Podcast: Episode 250 - The Human Cinematipede  

After quite literally years of podcasting, and uncountable hours of work going into it – the Failed Critics Film Podcast has reached its 250th episode! We know it’s just three or four blokes who have gotten to know each other quite well over the past five years, talking about films, but we’re pretty proud of it and hope that you enjoy listening to our little show as much as we've enjoyed reaching this milestone. If you think we show any promise at all, please subscribe and spread the word. Yes, for this very special edition, we've gone all retro. Hosts Steve Norman and Owen Hughes managed to convince both founding members James Diamond and Gerry McAuley to come out of retirement for old times' sake. Our rather serendipitous main release review this week is The Lego Batman Movie; a convenient call back to our review on the 100th episode. In fact, most things here are call-backs to past episodes, as you may notice from the featured image and bumf above, taken from the very first podcast published way back on the 25 April 2012. However, some things never change. There's still a quiz to kick us off (with added questions and catch-ups that I'm sure you're all dying to hear about) and we end with the recommendations. One in particular which will no doubt crush you on this Valentine's Day. What We've Been Watching has as eclectic a mix as ever: Owen watches Hearts of Darkness, the "best film about a film"; James explains why Brent: Life on the Road was such a disappointment; Steve is impressed by yet another Jack O'Connell performance in Angelina Jolie's Unbroken; and Gerry squanches all over Rick and Morty. Thanks to everybody who has downloaded this podcast - or any of our podcasts. Your support, feedback and kind comments have been the motivation for us to keep doing this. Who knows what we'll be doing in another 250 episodes, but we hope you'll still be listening - and hope you still find us idiots entertaining to listen to.

Failed Critics Unplugged: The Old Contemptibles  

Ow yow doin', ar kid? Y'am oroight, ay ya? Bostin'! This bonus triple bill episode has the dubious honour of being our first ever podcast recorded live in person without the aid of Skype. Owen Hughes, Tony Black and Andrew Brooker went all the way to a pub in Birmingham to record 70 minutes worth of bonus content just for the Hell of it. Alcohol was consumed and a quiet corner in a lovely little boozer was found. The fact that the Six Nations then kicked off and the Failed Critics were soon surrounded by a cacophony of noise, whilst being stared at by the barmaid for not ordering any drinks for an hour and a half, is by the by. A short opening 5 minutes or so of slightly-tipsy chatter aside, the format is much the same as usual. There's a What We've Been Watching segment, where Tony gives us his take on the first five Resident Evil films, Brooker rewatches Peter Berg's Deepwater Horizon in preparation for Patriots Day, and Owen categorically states that yes, Shallow Grave is indeed a film. The show is rounded off with a triple bill of our completely new ideas for films that would be guaranteed to win an Oscar. Paraplegics, Nazi Germany, political biopics, and, um, a touch of bestiality: the works! All of our ideas are of course copyright of Failed Critics - just in case you're reading this, Harvey Weinstein. We'll be back to normal (and much improved sound quality) for the 250th episode special, due out next week.

Failed Critics Podcast: Resident Evil Unlocked  

Welcome to this week's episode of the Failed Critics Podcast as sister and brother merge in a horrific act of audio incest. By which I mean that (our sister gaming podcast) Character Unlock's hosts Andrew Brooker and John Miller join Steve Norman and Owen Hughes to review video game adaptation franchise series movie thing Resident Evil: The Final Chapter. Naturally the chat descends into a general conversation about the games as well (although you really should listen to the latest Character Unlock Resident Evil VII special for that). Also on this edition of Failed Critics is a pointless quiz, a conflab about the relative merits of the Super Bowl trailers, and of course our regular What We've Been Watching. Steve is a double-hard bastard who ain't scared of no TV static after watching The Ring and The Ring 2; Brooker squeezes in his annual watch of Any Given Sunday; Owen incites the wrath of PETA after a review of Rats, Morgan Spurlock's documentary; and John gets all nostalgic over Yu-Gi-Oh! The Dark Side of Dimensions. Join us again, er, soon, for "Failed Critics Unplugged: Live from the Old Contemptibles".

Character Unlock: Residential Evil  

And so, as the first month of 2017 comes to a close, the first big video game of the year to make waves has finally arrived. But unlike Resident Evil VII's intrepid hero, Character Unlock is bringing back-up. Poached him from his regular seats on both Failed Critics and the Retro Gaming Discussion Show, hosts John Miller and Andrew Brooker enlist the help of Matt Lambourne in their exploration of the Baker Family House. The gaming trio also wade through the swampy undergrowth of the last week's gaming news. There's plenty to talk about: Between theorising the possible ups and downs of a Marvel/Square Enix collaboration, there's a brief chat on the soon-to-be-released Prey remake, and a trip down memory lane reminiscing on old Namco games in honour of the company's recently departed founder. Brooker finds himself in Hell as John talks more on his Mass Effect series playthrough and Matt discusses the pitfalls of being a FIFA Ultimate Team player to the detriment of all other games. In this week's main feature the team discuss their history with the world renowned Resident Evil series. From its humble beginnings, through its bloated action phase, and finally on to the newest first-person frightener: is it a return to form for the series? Has Resident Evil lost its way entirely? Is it possible to finish the game without staining your trousers? We answer all the burning questions (and a few more) in episode 11 of Character Unlock.

Failed Critics Podcast: T2: Trainspotting  

Welcome to this week's podcast as we hold the metaphorical tourniquet and inject you with our audio-skag. No c**t listens to this till we find out what c**t made it. (That would be Steve Norman, Owen Hughes, Paul Field and Matt Lambourne.) This week's main review is T2: Trainspotting; Danny Boyle's eagerly awaited (loose) adaptation of Irvine Welsh's sequel to his classic 1996 movie, starring Ewan McGregor, Ewen Bremner, Jonny Lee Miller and Robert Carlyle. Before all of that is this week's quiz, which follows Owen's verbal tirade about last week's booby-prize, the nonsensical British comedy Essex Spacebin, destined to be this year's Mob Handed. There's also a chat about the SAG awards as well reviews of Sadako vs Kayako (aka The Ring vs The Grudge), Oscar contender Hidden Figures, Paul's film of the year, A Man Called Ove, and the resurgent Shin Godzilla. Join us again next week for what will hopefully be two brand new episodes.

Failed Critics Podcast: La La Late  

Well it seems we were a little hasty this week in recording the podcast. If only we'd have waited another 12 hours, we could have discussed the actual nominations for the Academy Awards and not just speculated. Although it doesn't seem to matter as we were broadly correct in our predictions and round-up our thoughts in a brief news section to open the show proper (after Steve Norman hosts the long-delayed quiz finale between Owen Hughes and Callum Petch). Speaking of delays - apologies to those of you who were expecting an episode last week. Fate conspired against us on a number of occasions when we wanted to record. But don't worry! Even though record-breaking La La Land was not released this weekend but seven days earlier, we still bung it in with both Manchester By The Sea and animated comedy Sing in the new release reviews. We also found time to run through some other movies that we've been watching of late as Steve gets creeped out by Robin Williams in One Hour Photo, Owen raves about sci-fi writer Nigel Kneale, and Callum regales us with his story of a trip to see Labyrinth for the first time. Join us again next week for our T2: Trainspotting review, plus our usual load of shambolic nonsense.

Character Unlock: The Great Switcheroo  

It's business as usual this week as Character Unlock forgets the specials... Forgets the films... And forgets to do any form of planning. In the latest episode of the video game-centric podcast, hosts John Miller and Andrew Brooker thank their lucky stars that the big conference detailing Nintendo's latest console, the Switch, happened because otherwise they would have nothing to talk about. Shambolic as ever, the lads pick apart Nintendo's new machine, the games that are/aren't coming with it and the extra gubbins you need to buy just to make it worth owning. The guys wax lyrical on whether or not it's worth picking one up at launch and whether the possibility of a new Xbox this year (that totally isn't racist) is the better option when it comes to who gets their money. In other news, there's an attempt to tackle the cancellation of Platinum Games/Microsoft exclusive JRPG Scalebound's cancellation and the closing of a studio near and dear to Brooker's heart. Also this week: John finally gets his hands on Assassin's Creed: Syndicate; Brooker tries desperately to finish even one game from his pile of shame; and both prefer Madden to real life football at the moment. Such are the lives of these boring-ass gamers. Join us again in two weeks so the guys can share stories of acting like frightened children after the release of Resident Evil VII.

Failed Critics Podcast: Silence is Golden (Globes)  

Bad episode titles, published at 3am, and two miserly gits moaning about the world? It can only be the return of Failed Critics Podcast in 2017! Hosts Steve Norman and Owen Hughes are on their Todd for the first podcast of the new year to talk about Scorsese's latest drama, Silence, as well as supernatural hocus pocus shenanigans in The Invitation. The pair also end up chatting about the iconic Steven Spielberg after Steve's first ever watch of The Color Purple - and perhaps more surprisingly, Owen's first ever watch of Schindler's List. In the news, there's a chat about Carrie Fisher's passing, which leads to a discussion about the use of CGI to replace actors in movies. We also quickly skim through the winners and losers of the recent Golden Globes and the speeches that were worth paying attention to.

Character Unlock: The Assassin's Pod  

So begins 2017, the year that will almost certainly end with our hosts ruining the podcast completely because they refuse to stop talking about their big games once they come out. Wondering how much time the lads can actually spend talking about Mass Effect and Horizon: Zero Dawn? Stick with us this year and find out. But back to the present; with the Failed Critics guys having a well deserved week off (have you heard their stuff from the back end of the year? We're surprised Owen is still standing) we have decided to fill in the film flavoured hole that they've left this week. What better way to do that with rolling in an Assassin's Creed special that ends with us chatting about (and spoiling) the latest video-game adaptation? Fresh from their New Years Eve hangovers, hosts John Miller and Andrew Brooker return to dissect the decade old stealth series and have invited Failed Critics regular and Assassin's Creed super fan Brian Plank into our dark and dingy gaming basement to help us talk about the franchise that has moulded Ubisoft's gaming model for nearly ten years. Come spend some time with us as the boys enlighten you about their history with the Creed. What's John's favourite game in the series? Who is Brooker's top Assassin? Is Brian a secret (American) psychopath? All this and more in our epic special. Join us in a fortnight when we will... well, we don't know. Join us in two weeks when there will be a podcast. About something. Shambolic as ever. In the mean time, come find us on Twitter or Facebook (both @CharacterUnlock) and join in the conversation.

Failed Critics Podcast: Awards 2016 - part 2  

Fanfare, please! It's the final part of our Failed Critics Awards 2016 podcast. We've got the full list of all the films to make it onto our top 10 of the year, as voted for by you folks. Also in part 2, Steve Norman, Owen Hughes, Andrew Brooker and Callum Petch reveal which have been the best performances of 2016 from both male and female actors. Spoiler: Mob Handed star, Yvette Rowland, didn't make the shortlist - but did Mob Handed make it onto our worst 3 films of the year? Or even our top 10? You'll just have to listen to find out. If you missed the podcast yesterday, you can go back and listen to part 1 to find out what our best documentaries, British films, "foreign muck" and soundtracks are. We'll be back in the New Year, but until then, we'd just like to express our enormous gratitude to everybody who took the time to vote in this year's Failed Critics Awards. We're always surprised at just how many of you there are who are willing to give us any amount of your time, either to listen to the podcast, read our reviews or submit votes. Thanks and here's hoping you'll stick with us in 2017!

Failed Critics Podcast: Awards 2016 - part 1  

Welcome to the first part of this year's Failed Critics Awards! Rather than force you to sit through a two-hour podcast only days after our three-hour compilation episode came out, we've split this year's awards in half. In part one, hosts Steve Norman and Owen Hughes are joined by Andrew Brooker and Callum Petch to scowl, whoop and whine about the winners in: Best documentary; Best British film; Best film not in the English language; Best soundtrack. As well, of course, as our end of year quiz! We'll be back with the winners in our best male / female performances, worst films of the year and the big one, our top 10 movies of 2016 - as voted for by you, our listeners and readers. [APOLOGIES IF YOU RECEIVED A DUPLICATE OF THE 'BEST OF' EPISODE - PLEASE RE-DOWNLOAD TO GET THE PROPER AWARDS PODCAST]

Failed Critics Podcast: Christmas Compilation 2016  

It's just gone midnight on Christmas Eve, which means those of you who have managed stay up past your bedtime and wait for Father Christmas can officially open one of your presents early! I've got the perfect one for you, right here... This brand new episode is a three and a half hour long 'best of' the Failed Critics Podcast from the past 12 months, all cobbled together into some kind of Christmas TV type compilation episode. There's all of our favourite bits, including Paul's famous quizzes, reviews of Mob Handed and Killer Bitch, every single booby-prize that Owen and Steve put each other through, all of our pre-titles and post-credit stingers, and loads more. It's not gift wrapped. It's not store-bought. There's no receipt so you can't go and exchange it for any other podcast during the Boxing Day sales. But hopefully it'll keep you company should you be enduring any agonisingly long car journeys over this festive period. Merry Christmas all and a happy new year from everyone here at Failed Critics!

Character Unlock: So Long, 2016  

As the year draws to a close and everyone takes this opportunity to breathe a sigh of relief that the seemingly unending misery of the year of our Lord 2016 is finally over, it seems that we've actually had a pretty decent year for gaming. To celebrate, join hosts Andrew Brooker and John Miller as they rattle down their best games of the year; and scrape the barrel to name a couple of rubbish ones. The lads drag out some games that they've talked about before on previous episodes, refusing to stop beating those dead horses and instead opt to get as much life out of them as possible; as well as finally getting to talk about a couple of games that they've been holding on to for just this occasion. Tension and drama aplenty as John tries to big up one of his favourite games of the year but throws abuse at it instead, leaving Brooker to defend not only that, but the TWO Bethesda published games that John refuses to believe are good. Will this episode turn into a shouting match? Will either of them come out alive? Can you guess the one and only game the lads agreed on? All these answers and more in our final episode of 2016. Join us bright and early in 2017, hopefully before anything awful has happened, to welcome a couple of guests onto the show where we dissect the Assassin's Creed franchise. Merry Christmas everyone. Thanks for listening to us ramble on over the back end of this year and we look forward to prattling on for hours on end come the new year.

Failed Critics Podcast: Rogue Three - A Star Wars Podcast  

Once upon a time in a galaxy far, far away... a bunch of humanoids (that rather suspiciously looked a lot like regular homo-sapiens) hatched a plan to steal some prized blueprints that will allow these feisty rebels to finally topple their evil authoritarian overlord once and for all. Unfortunately for them, the best they could manage was to kick this wretched git off their podcast for a week instead, as Steve Norman, Paul Field and "Crisp Packet" Dave Valentine return for another Star Wars special episode - sans Owen Hughes. With the arrival of Rogue One: A Star Wars Story in cinemas this week - heralding Disney's monopoly over the Christmas blockbuster with their second attempt at reviving George Lucas's space-opera adventure series - we reunited last year's trio to dissect all things good and bad with the post-prequel-sequel-prequel... thing... There's a quiz (of course there's a quiz) that Quizcast host Paul takes charge of again, putting our Star Wars knowledge to the test, before a run through of the once-canon (but no longer so) spin-offs that arrived prior to 2015's The Force Awakens, including a very Ewoky Christmas and some surprisingly good animated shows. We won't be releasing a new podcast next week, but you can still check out last week's Christmas special if you're feeling festive! In the meantime, make sure you send in your votes for the Failed Critics Awards 2016 at failedcritics.com before midnight 27 December. Ignore Russell Brand, every vote counts. If you don't do your duty, you'll only have yourselves to blame if we end up with Mob Handed as our number one film of the year. You've been warned.

Failed Critics Podcast: Secret Sandra Xmas Special  

We left some mince pies and a nip of sherry out in the nip of sherry in a vain attempt to attract someone jolly onto the Christmas special podcast this year but instead we ended up with Steve Norman, Owen Hughes, Brian Plank and Tony Black. Festive frivolities ensue on our very merry podcast with a Christmas-themed quiz to kick things off before a plug for our Failed Critics Awards 2016 (which you can vote for here before 27 December: https://failedcritics.com/2016/12/12/failed-critics-awards-voting-2016/) and a glimpse at what we might be picking for each category. You can thank Tony's autocorrect for the invention of our Secret Sandra section of the show. Anonymously exchanging movies amongst each other in a 'secret santa' format, we somehow only exchanged one lump of coal. Steve ended up watching quirky black comedy I Love You, Philip Morris, whilst Brian unwrapped The Internet's Own Boy (a documentary about Aaron Swartz) and Tony mulled over topical horror-comedy Krampus. Meanwhile, Owen sulked in the corner at being made to watch Kevin James's Netflix Original, True Memoirs of an International Assassin. We stuffed the Failed Critics Podcast Christmas turkey with a few new releases just for good measure (and to hide the taste of our giblets). There's a few choice words for Office Christmas Party (look out for Brooker's written review tomorrow - it's a doozy) and a word of warning for those hoping to catch Nate Parker's The Birth of a Nation. We even make room for a wrap-up of Season One of Westworld. Join us again in a couple of days for our Rogue One: A Star Wars Story special!

Character Unlock: All The News Fit To Ignore  

As the year heads towards its end, it can only mean one thing: The annual splurge of awards shows and self-congratulatory press conferences continue and are going strong. In this last week, we've had the latest Geoff Keighley wank-a-thon award show. Whilst hosts John Miller and Andrew Brooker are skipping out on the awards, "who won what" and "what missed out", it is one of the best places outside of the gaming conventions to get an announcement or two and a few new trailers. This is where the lads are spending their time today. Talking of gaming conventions, Sony's first party touch-fest, "The Playstation Experience" gave us an hour long list of trailers, announcements and general silliness that the boys get into as well. In what is likely to be a semi-regular occurrence, the guys have turned their video game podcast into a news broadcast. They get everything off their chests from the last few days, covering both shows and their opinions on just about everything. Is Brooker likely to play The Last Guardian? What's his issue with Duke Nukem? And does John really not like Japanese people? Join us next time for our end of year special (so our hosts can get their best and worst games of the year out in the open).

Failed Critics Quizcast: Walk Right In  

You may have noticed that no podcast was published last week. Well, consider this week's special Quizcast episode our apology. An episode was recorded, but there was no time to edit it between then and this week's episode - hence why it's just gone 4.09am and here I am trying to publish in time for people's commutes on Tuesday! In our second quizcast of the year, we're rejoined by the FUTstock podcast's (previously FUThead) Matt Aguilera and Matt Lambourne after April's triumph. Making their debuts on the quizcast special are Ben Challoner and Daryl Bar from Sudden Double Deep, the triple bill title podcast. In a strange turn of events, we actually let Paul Field onto an episode that's entirely a quiz, despite his wretched run.... But not to worry, we've made him host so that Owen Hughes and Steve Norman can compete together as a team - we presume Steve was not aware of Owen's dismal losing streak in our previous attempts to win this thing. We'll be back as normal next week.

Character Unlock: Ninjas, Hackers and Number Twos  

No sooner have hosts John Miller and Andrew Brooker dusted themselves off from their mammoth Call of Duty special than they return for the third week in a row with a new episode. As Christmas approaches and everyone starts to do their "Best of 2016" lists - ours will be here in a few weeks - it must mean that the first game awards show of the season is upon us. As much as Brooker protests that he hates game awards, the pair manage to fumble their way through some of the more prominent awards from last week's Golden Joysticks. In an unusual turn, December's Games for Gold makes the news this week as the lads gush over the freebies we get over the festive season. John tries to convince Brooker of the virtues of Motorsport Manager this week, while Brooker confesses his undying love for left-to-die shooter, Titanfall 2 in this episodes What We've Been Playing. The guys also find time to chat about Watch Dogs 2, another sequel that surpasses its original. Rounding things off is a back and forth with the boys discussing stealth games, both good and bad, as John lets his inner pyromaniac out and Brooker makes a confession that ruins all his credibility as a gamer! Come join us in a fortnight for more shambolic nonsense as Character Unlock talks episodic gaming.

Failed Critics Podcast: Unremarkable Gits and Where to Find Them  

The team have all got their wands out and they're not afraid to [---DM unsolicited pictures of them---] show them in the latest triple bill episode of the Failed Critics podcast in honour of Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them, starring Meddie Redbayne as Newt Scaramanger. Hosts Steve Norman, Owen Hughes and Tony Black pick three movies each from the back catalogue of various stars from the big new release that's reigniting the Harry Potter extended universe (ugh), with an accompanying review courtesy of Mr Black. That's not the only latest release on this week's episode to receive a review, as Owen explains why his Twitter went nuts after he watched the Ken Loach drama, I, Daniel Blake. Meanwhile Steve rounds up what's happened so far in The Walking Dead as we slowly lurch closer to the mid-season break. There's quizzing, a chat about video game adaptations with the news that another attempt at making a Mortal Kombat movie gets off the ground, and a futile rant about the lack of independent movies shown in Cineworld.

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