Episodi
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Aike Ho (Partner, ACME Capital) and Camilla Hermann (entrepreneur) discuss "relationship yoga" - viewing intimate relationships as paths to growth through how we trigger each other. They explore how relationship patterns reveal unresolved aspects of ourselves and why finding a partner who's willing to evolve together matters more than matching a checklist of ideal traits.
Modern Relationships is a podcast from Turpentine. Learn more: www.turpentine.co
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SPONSOR: Relationship Hero
It’s an open secret in Silicon Valley that people are using relationship coaches. Sign up for 1-on-1 relationship coaching (from anywhere) at RelationshipHero.com/modern. Get $50 off your first session.
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FOLLOW ON X:
Aike - @aikeho
Camilla - @CamillaFHermann
Erik - @eriktorenberg
Turpentine - @turpentinemedia
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LINKS
Enneagram personalities https://www.enneagraminstitute.com/type-descriptions/
Dr. Becky "Good Inside" https://www.amazon.com/Good-Inside-Guide-Becoming-Parent/dp/0063159481
Hoffman Process https://www.hoffmaninstitute.org/
Evolution of The Internal Family Systems Model By Dr. Richard Schwartz, Ph. D.: https://ifs-institute.com/resources/articles/evolution-internal-family-systems-model-dr-richard-schwartz-ph-d
TIMESTAMPS:
(00:00) Intro and Preview
(01:33) What is Relationship Yoga?
(02:22) Relationship as a Canvas for Wholeness
(04:54) Triggers and the Opportunity for Healing
(08:40) Observing and Processing Triggers
(09:38) The Role of Past Experiences
(10:51) Holding Space & Interlocking Patterns
(11:32) Using the Enneagram
(12:56) Example of Reactivity and Softness
(14:00) Reparenting & the Little Ones
(15:39) Interlocking Triggers & Internal Family Systems (IFS)
(16:39) Working with Internal Parts
(20:07) Free Will & Running Patterns
(21:00) Growth, Ego Death & Commitment in Relationships
(23:11) Seeing With Fresh Eyes
(23:16) Sponsor: Relationship Hero
(24:59) The Art of Loving & Unconditional Acceptance
(28:30) Reflections on Being Single
(34:50) Challenges & Bouncing Back
(39:44) Patterns Want to be Liberated
(42:34) Causes of Struggle in Relationships
(55:57) Tension of Triggers and Attraction
(1:00:04) Advice For Making It Fantastic
(1:02:04) Connection: Spark, Attraction, Intimacy
(1:05:23) Wrap -
Liv Boeree (former poker champion, host of the Win-Win podcast) and Igor Kurganov (poker pro, co-founder of Raising for Effective Giving) have been together for 10 years. They're masters of creative conflict, inventors of the "hiss method," and champions of rational decision-making in relationships. In this candid episode, they share their unconventional wisdom and strategies for building lasting partnerships.
Modern Relationships is a podcast from Turpentine. Learn more: www.turpentine.co
--
SPONSOR: Relationship Hero
It’s an open secret in Silicon Valley that people are using relationship coaches. Sign up for 1-on-1 relationship coaching (from anywhere) at RelationshipHero.com/modern. Get $50 off your first session.
--
Follow on X:
Liv - @Liv_Boeree
Igor - @IgorKurganov
Erik - @eriktorenberg
Turpentine - @turpentinemedia
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Links:
The Win-Win Podcast: https://winwinpodcast.com/
The Passion Trap: https://www.amazon.com/Passion-Trap-Right-Unbalanced-Relationship/dp/1587361086
Erik's substack: https://eriktorenberg.substack.com/
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Timestamps:
(00:00) Intro and Preview
(02:21) How Liv and Igor Met
(06:04) Advice on Finding a Partner
(09:13) Friend Zone and Attraction
(13:02) Evolving Preferences
(15:03) Sponsor: Relationship Hero
(18:57) "Dumbbell Theory"
(25:43) The "Hiss" Signal
(27:53) Communication and Directness
(29:43) Relationship Rituals
(31:11) Variety and Self-Actualization
(33:16) The Passion Trap
(36:16) Thoughts on Children
(45:07) Longevity and Evolution
(47:57) Early Relationship Patterns
(50:17) Tone Policing
(51:47) Empowering Each Other
(53:34) Love Enables Choice
(57:16) Igor's Greatest Gift
(1:04:03) Identifying the Wrong Match
(1:06:14) The Future of Their Relationship
(1:07:54) Wrap -
Episodi mancanti?
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In this week's episode, Phil Levin and Kristen Berman share the ultimate friend zone to romance success story.
What started with running quirky social experiments together (like turning a bar into a controlled study on meeting people) blossomed into a relationship that defies convention. Now this behavioral scientist and founder (Live Near Friends) runs a "friend compound" in Oakland, applies data to life's biggest decisions, and proves that sometimes the best relationships start knowing it "would be too good." Kristen and Phil share how they've built an unconventional but deeply fulfilling life together. Instead of trying to change each other, they focus on designing their environment for success.
Modern Relationships is a podcast from Turpentine. Learn more: www.turpentine.co
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🙏 Help shape our show by taking our quick listener survey at https://bit.ly/TurpentinePulse
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Follow on X:
Kristen - @bermster
Phil - @levin_phil
Erik - @eriktorenberg
Turpentine - @turpentinemedia
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Links:
Kristen: https://irrationallabs.com/
Phil: https://livenearfriends.com/
Erik's substack: https://eriktorenberg.substack.com/
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Timestamps:
(00:00) Intro
(01:34) Relationship Differences & Learnings
(01:53) Partner Selection: Starting as Friends
(03:52) Navigating Attraction and Friendships
(05:30) Initial Connection and the "Mental Band"
(06:26) Key Lessons on Partner Selection
(09:16) Core Personality Traits and Acceptance
(10:04) Shared Values and Co-Living Vision
(14:16) Co-Living and Community Life
(18:28) Tradeoffs of Community Living
(19:13) Converting Friends & Attraction
(20:54) Chemistry and Early Relationship Stages
(21:44) Fighting and Disagreements
(24:28) Managing Conflict
(25:11) The Importance of a Good Partner
(26:53) Decisions Around Having Children
(30:07) Stress and Decision-Making Structures
(31:55) Careers as a Couple & Childcare
(38:39) Unique Fights & Rituals for Forgiveness
(40:46) Lessons from Dan Ariely
(42:45) Behavior Change and Life Design
(49:25) "Thieves" Friendship Hack
(50:23) Vision for the Future
(56:12) Career Priorities
(57:53) Taboo Topics and Memorable Conversations
(1:00:00) Baby Number Two
(1:00:39) Wrap -
We rarely get to hear how high-powered tech couples actually make relationships work. In this remarkably candid conversation, Delian Asparouhov (Founders Fund partner and Co-Founder of Varda Space Industries) and author Nadia Asparouhov pull back the curtain on their unique approach to love and commitment. From their memorable first date featuring frantically-eaten burrata to building a space company while starting a family, they share how they've figured out what really matters - and why sometimes the best relationship advice is to talk less, not more. Together with Erik Torenberg, they dig into everything from their unconventional take on conflict resolution to what it's actually like balancing a growing family with ambitious work in tech.
Modern Relationships is a podcast from Turpentine. Learn more: www.turpentine.co
--
🙏 Help shape our show by taking our quick listener survey at https://bit.ly/TurpentinePulse
--
Follow on X:
Nadia - @nayafia
Delian - @zebulgar
Erik - @eriktorenberg
Turpentine Podcasts - @turpentinemedia
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Links:
Nadia's writing: https://nadia.xyz/
Delian's site: https://delian.io/
Erik's substack: https://eriktorenberg.substack.com/
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Timestamps:
(00:00) Preview and Intro
(00:46) Origin of Modern Relationships
(01:48) "Make marriages great again"
(02:59) Fighting about the Eight Sleep mattress
(06:27) Handling unvoiced feelings
(10:05) Prison metaphor
(10:47) Early stages of the relationship
(14:03) First date and first impressions
(15:58) The burrata incident
(20:54) Ranking relationship priorities
(22:59) Finding the sweet spot in a relationship
(27:10) Communication and commitment
(32:46) Parenthood drudgery
(37:09) Debating young parenthood
(42:37) Having children
(49:32) Building 'an aristocracy'
(54:20) Balancing identity and motherhood
(56:05) Growing together through changes
(58:11) Tough guy cries at space movies
(58:41) Wrap -
Introducing "Modern Relationships" a podcast about how people in tech actually make relationships work. Preview from episode 1 with Delian Asparouhov (Founders Fund, Varda Space Technology) and Nadia Asparouhova (author), interviewed by Erik Torenberg
