Episodi
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With Travis lost at sea, Darren is joined by Vince live outside BMO stadium after a SOUND 1-0 LAFC victory over FC Dallas, with our new look LAFC simply taking care of what is now business as usual, on a Pride Night at BMO with 10/10 vibes. Bouanga came through with maybe the easiest finish he's had all season off a beautiful pass from the hottest player on the squad right now, Mateusz Bogusz. That's hot as in playing well, not looks. That's still Denis. Obviously. We're catchin up on a whole lotta laundry, too. The SHEETS are CLEAN, friends.
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Clean Sheet Watch CONTINUES with a beautiful 2-0 victory over tight table buddies Minnesota United, who turns out, might not be so good after all. Travis, Vince and Darren break down everything you need to know while the stream also breaks down in maybe one of the worst string of technical difficulties to pod has ever seen. We talked Pierogi SZN with that a goal of the year candidate for Mati Bogusz, Duenas' first stretch of really solid first team minutes, and Kai Kamara's long, long, long, long desire to tie Landon Donovan's goal scoring record. Happy Birthday JOEY ONE BAR!
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Episodi mancanti?
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Minnesota is near the top of the table. Dallas is... also on the table. Travis, Darren, and Vince breakdown everything you need to know about the match week, including why our defense is looking unstoppable, if Minnesota is a legit contender, and is Lizzo canceled. Then we play a World Famous Darren Miller Trivia Game where we find out just how connected is the city of Dallas to the state of Minnesota. And also, we assure Vince's mom that Vince isn't in prison. (He's out on a plea deal.) HAPPY MDW BABY!!!
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Red Card Giveth. Red Card Taketh Away. Travis and Darren break down our SECOND league road win of the year, in a truly terrifying match up against a shook Atlanta squad. We talk Bogusz' beautiful goal and Bogusz' not so beautiful game. We talk Atuesta's affinity for yellow cards, and Dolo's affinity for never subbing him off. And as always, we spend way too much time discussing something that has nothing to do with the game: AI. What worst start in club history? BLACK AND GOLD ARE BACK BABY!!!
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W E G R E W T H E G A M E!!!!!!!
W E G R E W T H E G A M E!!!!!!!
W E G R E W T H E G A M E!!!!!!!
W E G R E W T H E G A M E!!!!!!!
W E G R E W T H E G A M E!!!!!!!
We are going to the quarterfinals baby!! Darren, Vince, and Travis (in a bathrobe) break down that BARNBURNER of a Lamar Hunt US Open Cup Match where we discuss everything: Tomás Ángel's first start, Tomás Ángel's first goal, and even Tomás Ángel's falling down on the way to maybe score his second. That said, if you are Tomás Ángel and you hear this: WE DO NOT AGREE WITH GEOFF TOCK!!!! HE IS A BAD MAN AND WE HATE HIM!!! Also, shout out to Tommy Musto. Our new favorite player. #MustoNation RISE UP!
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It's time to grow the game baby!!! Darren, Vince, and Travis are back breaking down BOTH games this week, starting first with the VERY IMPORTANT match against Loudoun United in the Lamar Hunt US Open Cup and then the tough road game against a weak Atlanta squad. We decide once and for all who should start for our defense, play a game about all the exciting tourist options in Loudoun County, and we even pay Vince money WHICH IS ALMOST LIKE BEING HIRED. Let's get LOUD-oun!!!!!!
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Don't look now, but we're tied for second in the West. This game had everything: Hugo saved penalty, Bouanga Blast Boing Boing, questionable red card, and dozens of people wearing ravioli hats for some reason. Darren, Vince, and Travis break it down everything you need to know from this Wednesday 8am game. And they said we couldn't win on the road, huh?
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It's official: OLIVIER GIROUD IS BLACK AND GOLD and he's excited to play next to superstar Christian Olivera. Travis, Darren, and Vince break down LAFC's masterclass against Vancouver, the question mark hanging over The Smart Choice, and we only mention Vanni Sartini for 60 seconds! Then, we do a quarterly review of our pre-season predictions and circle back, touchbase, all from the 30,000ft view. Plus, Darren cries about his bet not cashing (and it's REALLY pathetic). That's Sports, Baby!
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The following is a quote from Mr. Goaltee himself Kiké Olivera:
"I'm coming out
I want the world to know, got to let it show
I'm coming out
I want the world to know, I got to let it show
There's a new me coming out and I just had to live
And I wanna give, I'm completely positive
I think this time around, I am gonna do it
Like you never knew it, oh, I'll make it through
The time has come for me to break out of this shell
I have to shout that I am coming out
I'm coming out, I want the world to know
I got to let it show (I'm coming)
I'm coming out
I want the world to know, I got to let it show
I'm coming out
I want the world to know, I got to let it show
I'm coming out
I want the world to know, I got to let it show
I've got to show the world all that I wanna be
And all my abilities, there's so much more to me
Somehow I'll have to make them just understand
I got it well in hand and oh how I have planned
I'm spreadin' love, there is no need to fear
And I just feel so good, every time I hear
I'm coming out, I want the world to know
I got to let it show
I'm coming out, I want the world to know
Got to let it show
I'm coming out, I want the world to know
Got to let it show
I'm coming out, I want the world to know
Got to let it show
I'm coming out, I want the world to know
Got to let it show
I'm coming out, I want the world to know
Got to let it show
I'm coming out, I want the world to know
Got to let it show
I'm coming out, I want the world to know
Got to let it show
I'm, I'm coming out
I have to shout that I'm coming out
I want the world to know
Got to let it show
I'm coming, I'm coming out"
We won 3-0, suck on that Sartini.
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It's our favorite time of the year: talking about the Vancouver Whitecaps!!!! We just LOVE to talk about that interesting team! Darren, Vince, and Travis break down everything you need to know about Hugo Lloris' struggles, who we might lose or gain this summer, and we answer a ton of listener questions. Plus, we spend like 3 hours talking about Vanni Sartini pantomiming you know what after we beat them in last year's MLS Cup playoffs. Like, we talk about it, A LOT. I like my martinis like I like my Sartinis: extra dirty!
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Wow, we really did grow the game tonight, didn't we folks? LAFC flew out to Las Vegas, scored three times on a dirty pitch, and flew home with a feeling of deep regret and sorrow. Olivera got a brace, Romero got some playing time, and the stream was uploaded in 56k. As we all know, the Lamar Hunt US Open Cup is the most important trophy ever created and we are on our way to bringing it home. VEGAS BABY!
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LAFC has raised the bar for just how low the floor can go in 2024. Ironically, the one bright spot of this match is that Olivera finally found the net! And the rest is a pit of darkness we waste no time diving into. Between callers venting, Heel Of The Foot Geoff Tock still finding new ways to be a true heel to us, the team, and even the rest of our viewers, and a firestorm of angry fans in the live chat, we confidently navigated every shade of black on this one. Gold: TBD. Maybe it'll be in Vegas! But that's a thing a lot of people say, and they don't often find it there. We thought Travis picked the wrong week to be there, but this turned out to be a good match to miss. Rest up. First mid-week match on Wednesday.
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Two matches in one week? What is this... 2023? Darren, Travis, and Vince are back with a DOUBLE EPISODE covering our Levi Stadium match up against the San Jose Earthquakes and the US Open Cup match up against a team with kiddie pools lining the stadium. We talk LAFC's surprisingly good April, we give all the players Vegas recs, and spend way too long talking just how full Levi Stadium will look on Saturday. Plus, Travis plugs his wife's show for way too long. If the house always wins, I hope the house is owned by Will Ferrell!!!!
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Most fun livestream of the season! A hard fought game FINALLY goes our way as we remain unbeaten at home. Vince, Darren, and Travis break down a rollercoaster of a match against the surprisingly good Portland Timbers. We got overconfident, then we got underconfident, and then we got normal confident. We talked Maxime v Hugo. We talked Olivera vs Olivera. And we talked Darren vs his adoring fans. And say it with me folks... BOUANGA BLAST!!!!!!
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Despite LAFC's less than stellar performance throughout most of the game, they manage to steal a point from the team at the top of the table. We asked for lineup changes! We fucked around and found out, and in some cases what we found out was pretty good (Chanot), in some cases it didn't go so well (Bogusz, Segura), and in some cases, Aaron long slid his leg right into a goal post to save a goal and ruin his season only to have his replacement score an own goal before Long is even able to leave the pitch. Meanwhile, is Bouanga.... BACK!??? It's possible Bouanga is back. Bouanga might be back. But in the end, maybe all that really matters is that we tread water long enough to make it to the summer transfer window. As boring as that is. Leave it to Geoff Tock, Heel Of The Foot, to come up with a take this boring.
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No, you're not dying. You just smoked too much before the 4/20 game this Saturday. Darren, Vince, and Travis break down everything you need to know about this weeks very high match up against MLS leaders Red Bull New York. Then we're joined by Keaton Cashier of the 42 Originals LAFC Supporter Group who talks about what a cannabis supporter group actually does and why it matters to the game. And of course, we talk about how a man on the Red Bulls abandoned his wife and kids to play in New Jersey! That's truly insane! We spend a lot of time talking about that! But we should have talked about it more because it's truly wild!!! 4/20 BLAZE IT.
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PRO Giveth and PRO Taketh Away. Darren, Vince, and Travis break down a frustrating tie on the road that was needed, but still felt like a loss. We talk Palencia trying to fight Max, Bouanga's desperate need for anti-depressants, and even Crépeau getting a red to save us again. There are glimmers of hope with this squad, but is it time to change up our line up? We don't know, we are two dumb guys and one smart guy who is forced to listen to dumb guys.
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TONS OF NEW MERCH AVAILABLE AT HAPPYFOOTSADFOOTPOD.COM.
Patreon subscribers get 15% off everything and exclusive access to our limited edition member only scarves!
MLS Player vs Pokemon is back! Darren, Vince, and Travis break down everything you need to know before watching our Portland match up. And don't worry, this episode has everything: Maxime Crepeau, a butt goal, and even three white people talking about J. Cole! That's what you all signed up for right!
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There is no joy in El Tráfico. Only relief. And boy was that true tonight. Darren, Vince, and Travis break down a must-win match up at home against a soaring Galaxy team, and this game had everything: great defense from our backline, a rock hard goal from Timmy, and Bouanga doing the least Bouanga thing we've ever seen. It wasn't the prettiest game, but a wins and win. LA IS BLACK AND GOLD!
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The drums are drumming. The tweets are tweeting. The coolers are crumbling. It's time for El Tráfico. Not only do we play the dumbest game in the history of this podcast, but Travis defends his Twitter meltdown, Vince explains why Carson is so good this year, and Darren gets a new nickname. It's the first El Tráfico where LAFC is the underdog, and don't worry-- we are just as stressed out as normal! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!
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