Episodi
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Humility isn’t just deferring to the desires of others. It’s also standing up for the weak.
So says Dennis Edwards, vice president for church relations and dean of the seminary at North Park University, on this episode of Being Human. Cuss and Edwards talk about how Edwards’s many experiences of being the only Black man in the room have shaped him and his perspective. They talk about thoughtful and biblical approaches to theological education, the modern political landscape, and social media. And Cuss and Edwards consider how, for all of its flaws and challenges, the local church can offer unity in a way entirely its own.
Resources mentioned in this episode or recommended by the guest include:
RevDrDre.com
Humility Illuminated: The Biblical Path Back to Christian Character by Dennis R. Edwards
1 Peter (The Anchor Yale Bible Commentaries) by John H. Elliott
The Urban Christian: Effective Ministry in Today’s Urban World by Ray Bakke
Bowen family systems theory
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The Bear is a show about cooking, kitchens, and Chicago. But for anyone who has watched more than an episode or two, it’s clear there’s more to the story.
On this special episode of Being Human, host Steve Cuss looks at seven core themes in the hit FX show The Bear. Through the lens of systems theory and anxiety theory, Cuss considers the false needs and beliefs revealed in the show’s characters. He examines their contagious anxiety, sheds light on their conflict patterns, and considers what the show has to say about relationships. Diving into everything from untamed ambition to unprocessed trauma, Cuss ponders the deeply human moments that keep viewers returning to The Bear.
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Episodi mancanti?
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On this episode of Being Human, host Steve Cuss welcomes Alan Briggs, the founder of Stay Forth, a coaching organization that focuses on leader health and sustainable impact. Briggs’s latest book, AntiBurnout, empowers readers to avoid the perils of burnout and offers practical ways to measure one’s own health and well-being.
Cuss and Briggs discuss the back-to-school anxiety that so many families face, how our individual wiring contributes to our unique anxiety triggers, and how to navigate modern political life. Their discussion includes tips and tools for identifying the skills, gifts, and abilities that can lead us away from resentment and toward rest.
Resources mentioned during this episode include:
The Expectation Gap: The Tiny, Vast Space between Our Beliefs and Experience of God by Steve Cuss
God, Christ and Us by Herbert McCabe
AntiBurnout: A Lighter Way to Live and Lead in a Heavy World by Alan Briggs
Stay Forth
Dr. Wes Beavis
The 6 Types of Working Genius: A Better Way to Understand Your Gifts, Your Frustrations, and Your Team by Patrick Lencioni
The Enneagram
Capable Life
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The Sermon on the Mount is beautiful. It’s also hard.
On this episode of Being Human, host Steve Cuss welcomes his friend, the pastor and author Rich Villodas. The two discuss Villodas’ new book, The Narrow Path, which focuses on the Matthew text. Villodas and Cuss discuss false needs, the longing for the good life, and what it means that God only dwells in reality.
Resources mentioned during this episode include:
New Life Fellowship Church
The Deeply Formed Life: Five Transformative Values to Root Us in the Way of Jesus by Rich Villodas
Good and Beautiful and Kind: Becoming Whole in a Fractured World by Rich Villodas
The Narrow Path: How the Subversive Way of Jesus Satisfies Our Soulsby Rich Villodas
God, Christ and Us by Herbert McCabe
Faith Within Reason by Herbert McCabe
The Ragamuffin Gospel: Good News for the Bedraggled, Beat-Up, and Burnt Out by Brennan Manning
Pete Scazzero
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“Being Human with Steve Cuss” is a production of Christianity Today
Executive Produced by Erik Petrik and Mike Cosper
Produced and Edited by Matt Stevens
Associate Producers: McKenzie Hill, Raed Gilliam, and Abby Perry
Theme song by Dan Phelps
Original Music by Andy Gullahorn
Mix Engineer: Kevin Morris
Graphic Design: Amy Jones
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“I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do.”
So says Paul in Romans 7, and so, it seems, says the character of Riley in Disney and Pixar’s Inside Out 2. On a special episode of Being Human, host Steve Cuss and his wife, therapist Lisa Cuss, explore what the film has to say about being human.
They talk about the film in terms of the internal family systems model and family systems theory. Ultimately, they consider what it looks like to notice parts of ourselves while remembering our core identity in Christ.
Resources mentioned in this episode include:
Inside Out
Inside Out 2
Internal family systems model
Bowen family systems theory
Richard Schwartz
Capable Life
“Put Yourself on Your Conscious List of Relationships”
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There are different kinds of anxiety, but there is one type of anxiety that always feels real in the moment when it is not. Unlike acute anxiety which is always based on a real threat, like when you have to swerve to avoid a car, chronic anxiety is always based on a false threat. Like making everyone happy, or doing it perfectly every time or always needing to be there for others.
In this episode Steve and Lisa dig into what do you think you need that you don’t really need? And they also help you identify the big 5 sources of false anxiety.
Steve’s latest book explores the gap between our belief and our experience.
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Are you on your own conscious list of relationships?
If not, this episode is for you. Host Steve Cuss is joined by his wife, Lisa, to chat about putting yourself on your conscious list of relationships, responding to your inner critic, and three simple ways to diffuse anxiety in any situation. Steve and Lisa discuss the Enneagram, opportunities for individual and collective growth, and how connecting with God can improve our sense of self.
This episode offers tangible practices for those who want to improve all types of relationships. These tools and more are featured in Steve’s latest book The Expectation Gap.
Visit Stevecusswords.com to access free courses that go along with this episode.
Being Human will be on hiatus until August 18th. In the meantime, would you consider leaving a written review of Being Human or sharing this episode with someone you think might benefit? We really appreciate your support!
Resources mentioned in this episode include:
The Enneagram
“Brené Brown on Comparative Suffering, the 50/50 Myth, and Settling the Ball”
Steve’s Free Courses
“Being Human with Steve Cuss” is a production of Christianity Today
Executive Produced by Erik Petrik and Mike Cosper
Produced and Edited by Matt Stevens
Associate Producers: McKenzie Hill, Raed Gilliam, and Abby Perry
Theme song by Dan Phelps
Original Music by Andy Gullahorn
Mix Engineer: Kevin Morris
Graphic Design: Amy Jones
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Love isn’t meant to be conditional, especially when it comes to our understanding of how God loves us. But this episode’s guest—pastor, author, and podcaster Luke Norsworthy—says we’re far too normalized to the idea that love is contingent upon how we practice our faith, obey, and function in general.
On this episode, Norsworthy and Cuss talk about whether or not the phrase “unconditional love” is redundant. They consider how family language can be misused and what it might look like to become more integrated in our lives. They talk about the parable of the prodigal son, what it is to be acquainted with grief as a believer, and how to process disappointment. Their conversation also covers celebrity pastors, loneliness, and the value of vulnerability.
The Expectation Gap by Steve Cuss is now available—order here!
Resources mentioned in this episode include:
Luke Norsworthy
Norsworthy
How to Love the Life You Already Have: A Guide to Becoming the Person Life is Demanding You Be by Luke Norsworthy
Craft and Character with Luke Norsworthy
Herbert McCabe
The Prayers of the People
Pepperdine University
Grieve, Breathe, Receive: Finding a Faith Strong Enough to Hold Us by Steve Carter
Curt Thompson
“Being Human with Steve Cuss” is a production of Christianity Today
Executive Produced by Erik Petrik and Mike Cosper
Produced and Edited by Matt Stevens
Associate Producers: McKenzie Hill, Raed Gilliam, and Abby Perry
Theme song by Dan Phelps
Original Music by Andy Gullahorn
Mix Engineer: Kevin Morris
Graphic Design: Amy Jones
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How can people connect with others without merging into them or letting them take over? How can we differentiate ourselves from one another while remaining connected in meaningful ways?
These are some of the questions that Being Human host Steve Cuss poses to his guests, Grace Liu and Cory Elisabeth. The founders of Pursue Inner Growth, a coaching and counseling service in Indonesia, Liu and Elisabeth share rich and nuanced thoughts on how culture, place, and heritage shape who we are.
Cuss speaks with Liu and Elisabeth about the unique challenges Southeast Asians face, the difference between an individualistic culture and a communal one, and how people can deal with both individual and communal shame. Their conversation covers some of the variances in Western and Asian psychology, such as what the idea of setting boundaries looks like in different cultures. Liu and Elisabeth walk through case studies of difficult interpersonal situations, discuss the implications of honor-shame culture, and share what they, as Indonesian women, wish that Cuss knew as a white man.
The Expectation Gap by Steve Cuss is now available—order here!
“Being Human with Steve Cuss” is a production of Christianity Today
Executive Produced by Erik Petrik and Mike Cosper
Produced and Edited by Matt Stevens
Associate Producers: McKenzie Hill, Raed Gilliam, and Abby Perry
Theme song by Dan Phelps
Original Music by Andy Gullahorn
Mix Engineer: Kevin Morris
Graphic Design: Amy Jones
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Artist. Theologian. Immigrant.
These are the three words that come to mind for host Steve Cuss when he thinks of his guest, Phuc (Phu) Luu. On this episode, Luu responds to each of those terms, sharing how they make up who he is.
Cuss and Luu discuss what it means to take refuge and the meaning to be found in the fact that Jesus himself had to take sanctuary. They talk about art as a way to depict one's inner world and what motivates Luu to paint. Luu also reacts to the image of King Charles’ new portrait in real-time on the episode (which was recorded before the vandalization of the portrait by activists).
They also discuss Luu’s book Jesus of the East and its themes, including broken harmony, the restoration of Shalom, and the Korean term “han,” which means a sense of woundedness that is so deep there is no English equivalent. Luu also vulnerably shares what it’s like to be the only Vietnamese or minority culture person in the room.
Tune in for an episode that tenderly and powerfully considers ethnicity, belonging, and the Jesus who understands everything about who we are.
The Expectation Gap by Steve Cuss is now available—order here!
Resources mentioned in this episode include:
Phuc Luu
People of the Way: Phuc Luu’s Notebook
Jesus of the East: Reclaiming the Gospel for the Wounded by Phuc Lu
Irenaeus of Lyons
Andrew Sung Park
Francis Bacon
King Charles’ portrait
“Being Human with Steve Cuss” is a production of Christianity Today
Executive Produced by Erik Petrik and Mike Cosper
Produced and Edited by Matt Stevens
Associate Producers: McKenzie Hill, Raed Gilliam, and Abby Perry
Theme song by Dan Phelps
Original Music by Andy Gullahorn
Mix Engineer: Kevin Morris
Graphic Design: Amy Jones
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How many minutes per week do you think you can be exactly yourself?
That’s the question that host Steve Cuss poses at the beginning of this episode, and it takes on specific meaning as he converses with his guest, Marvin Williams. Williams is the lead pastor of Trinity Church in Lansing, Michigan, and is currently earning his doctorate in systems theory, particularly as it pertains to the African-American experience. His forthcoming dissertation, My Whole Black Self, considers what it’s like to be exactly yourself and what happens when people cannot be exactly themselves.
Cuss and Williams discuss what drew Williams to systems theory, how leadership starts with personal transformation, and what it looks like to live in one’s identity fully. They talk about bullying, anxiety, and the Black writers, thinkers, and experts who have influenced Williams’ perspective. The two discuss connectedness, what it’s like to be in majority culture spaces, and how calmness is not always the opposite of anxiety. Their discussion also explores violence against Black Americans, the nuances of pastoring, and the role of politics in the life of the church.
The Expectation Gap by Steve Cuss is now available—order here!
Resources mentioned in this episode include:
Marvin Williams
A Failure of Nerve: Leadership in the Age of the Quick Fix by Edwin H. Friedman
Murray Bowen
Bowen family systems theory
Trisha Taylor
“To Belong to One Another: Remaining Calm and Curious in Times of High Anxiety” with Rich Villodas
The Souls of Black Folk from W.E.B. Du Bois
Psychological Storms: The African American Struggle for Identity by Thomas Parham
Charlie Dates
Invisible Man by Ralph Ellison
“Being Human with Steve Cuss” is a production of Christianity Today
Executive Produced by Erik Petrik and Mike Cosper
Produced and Edited by Matt Stevens
Associate Producers: McKenzie Hill, Raed Gilliam, and Abby Perry
Theme song by Dan Phelps
Original Music by Andy Gullahorn
Mix Engineer: Kevin Morris
Graphic Design: Amy Jones
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Gender dynamics in the workplace.
What to do when you’re the only one of your kind in the room.
The power dynamics and damage of the #MeToo and #ChurchToo scandals.
These are some of the heavy topics that Steve Cuss and his guest, leadership development expert Kadi Cole, consider on this episode of Being Human. Their conversation draws upon Cole’s years spent developing women leaders and working with diverse teams as one of the world’s foremost leaders in helping organizations navigate healthy gender dynamics.
Cuss and Cole talk about the ways people camouflage themselves to fit into a group, how men and women handle inner confidence differently, and what it looks like to be ourselves in Christ. Their discussion covers how leaders can cultivate safe environments that allow people to show up as they are, the effects of powerful leaders with unaddressed childhood wounds, and how Cole’s background as a nurse prepared her to engage executive leadership with a holistic perspective.
They also talk about Momentum Marketplace, Cole’s new initiative to help young, kingdom-minded leaders be mentored in the marketplace.
The Expectation Gap by Steve Cuss is now available!
Resources mentioned in this episode include:
Kadi ColeDeveloping Female Leaders: Navigate the Minefields and Release the Potential of Women in Your Church by Kadi Cole
Find Your Leadership Voice in 90 Days: How to show up, speak up, and stand out with confidence by Kadi Cole
“Code switching, covering, masking and social camouflage”
Momentum Marketplace
The Expectation Gap: The Tiny, Vast Space between Our Beliefs and Experience of God by Steve Cuss
“Being Human with Steve Cuss” is a production of Christianity Today
Executive Produced by Erik Petrik and Mike Cosper
Produced and Edited by Matt Stevens
Associate Producers: McKenzie Hill, Raed Gilliam, and Abby Perry
Theme song by Dan Phelps
Original Music by Andy Gullahorn
Mix Engineer: Kevin Morris
Graphic Design: Amy Jones
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Is the gospel primarily preventative or redemptive? What did Jesus emphasize between the two?
In this episode of Being Human, Steve is joined by his wife, the Friendly Neighborhood Therapist, Lisa, to consider these questions. They talk about faith gaps, how human development affects the ways we approach faith, and comparing ourselves to the pillars of the faith.
Cuss also reads from his upcoming book, The Expectation Gap, which releases on May 28th. Listeners can preorder here. Get your preorder bonuses here!
Resources mentioned in this episode include:
The Gap
“Grieve, Breathe, Receive” with Steve Carter
Camino De Santiago
John F. Kennedy, Jr. playing under the Resolute Desk
The Crown
Get Out of My Life, but First Could You Drive Me & Cheryl to the Mall: A Parent's Guide to the New Teenager by Anthony E. Wolf
Aurora Leigh by Elizabeth Barrett Browning
The Expectation Gap: The Tiny, Vast Space between Our Beliefs and Experience of God by Steve Cuss
Preorder bonuses for The Expectation Gap
“Being Human with Steve Cuss” is a production of Christianity Today
Executive Produced by Erik Petrik and Mike Cosper
Produced and Edited by Matt Stevens
Associate Producers: McKenzie Hill, Raed Gilliam, and Abby Perry
Theme song by Dan Phelps
Original Music by Andy Gullahorn
Mix Engineer: Kevin Morris
Graphic Design: Amy Jones
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Steve Cuss has a special burden for pastors and church staff. As someone who spent 27 years in such roles, he knows the unique challenges personally. On this episode, Cuss shares some of his own journey, including how he struggled with conflating his identities as a child of God and what felt like being an employee of God.
Cuss talks about the gap between what we believe about God and what we experience from God. He guides listeners through the story of Peter walking on water (Matt. 14). Cuss discusses peace, freedom, and love, inviting us to help our body align with our head beliefs so we can relax into God’s presence.
Cuss also reads from his upcoming book, The Expectation Gap, releasing May 28, which listeners can preorder here. Preorder bonuses are available here.
Resources mentioned in this episode include:
Managing Leadership Anxiety: Yours and Theirs by Steve Cuss
“From a Distance”
Matthew 14
The Expectation Gap: The Tiny, Vast Space between Our Beliefs and Experience of God by Steve Cuss
Preorder bonuses for The Expectation Gap
“Being Human with Steve Cuss” is a production of Christianity Today
Executive Produced by Erik Petrik and Mike Cosper
Produced and Edited by Matt Stevens
Associate Producers: McKenzie Hill, Raed Gilliam, and Abby Perry
Theme song by Dan Phelps
Original Music by Andy Gullahorn
Mix Engineer: Kevin Morris
Graphic Design: Amy Jones
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“Did you have integrity today?”
That’s the question that Steve Carter, author, podcaster, and former lead teaching pastor of Willow Creek Community Church, pictured his son asking him when allegations of sexual harassment against Bill Hybels emerged. Carter realized he couldn’t go “play church.” He had to take the allegations seriously and act with integrity, which, for him, looked like resigning.
On this episode of Being Human, Cuss and Carter discuss what it looks like to have integrity when mentors and institutions fail us. They talk about the heartbreak of losing beloved communities, navigating relationships when people feel betrayed, and how difficult it is to see broken systems when inside them.
Carter shares how he has dealt with the weight of being misunderstood, the way some of his highest values were wielded against him, and what it was like to deal with public loss and accusation as an Enneagram Three. He and Cuss talk about the power of the resurrection and the two Greek words that became an anchor for Carter. And they discuss what propelled Carter to write Grieve, Breathe, Receive—a stunning memoir on grief and healing that recounts Carter leaving Willow Creek Church, entering a wilderness season, and enduring loss upon loss upon loss, from income and reputation to precious family members and more.
Resources mentioned in this episode include:
Luke: Interpretation: A Bible Commentary for Teaching and Preaching by Fred B. Craddock
Steve Carter
Craft & Character with Steve Carter
Grieve, Breathe, Receive: Finding a Faith Strong Enough to Hold Us by Steve Carter
The Thing Beneath the Thing: What's Hidden Inside (and What God Helps Us Do About It) by Steve Carter
Willow Creek Community Church
“Managing Leadership Anxiety: Yours and Theirs”
“Cadet Prayer”
Annie F. Downs
Ira Glass
Camino De Santiago
“What Is a Verbatim?”
Compassion International
“Welcoming Practice”
The Worst James Harden Flops
“Being Human with Steve Cuss” is a production of Christianity Today
Executive Produced by Erik Petrik and Mike Cosper
Produced and Edited by Matt Stevens
Associate Producers: McKenzie Hill, Raed Gilliam, and Abby Perry
Theme song by Dan Phelps
Original Music by Andy Gullahorn
Mix Engineer: Kevin Morris
Graphic Design: Amy Jones
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A systems theorist walks into an organization and orders playfulness and earnestness.
This isn’t just a silly take on a joke format—it’s a tested method of determining whether or not teams have what it takes to go the distance. As host Steve Cuss explains on this episode of Being Human, too much seriousness on a team tends to lead to rigidity, but playful teams tend to be able to handle ambiguity and challenges.
Could the same be true for worship?
Sometimes we get too earnest and everything gets rigid. In this episode Steve looks at the power of playfulness in your people, how ot notice when things are getting too earnest and stuck and the relationship between playfulness and worship. Steve also teaches us how to use a Life Giving List to help us relax into God’s presence. You can download a life giving list template here.
Tune in for an episode that invites us to treasure our faith through playful presence with God.
Click here to pre order Steve’s new book.
Resources mentioned in this episode include:
Bowen family systems theory
Death by Meeting: A Leadership Fable About Solving the Most Painful Problem in Business by Patrick Lencioni
Orthodoxy by G.K. Chesterton
“Letter XLVI” by Saint Bernard of Clairvaux
The Expectation Gap: The Tiny, Vast Space between Our Beliefs and Experience of God by Steve Cuss
Generation to Generation: Family Process in Church and Synagogue by Edwin Friedman
“Being Human with Steve Cuss” is a production of Christianity Today
Executive Produced by Erik Petrik and Mike Cosper
Produced and Edited by Matt Stevens
Associate Producers: McKenzie Hill, Raed Gilliam, and Abby Perry
Theme song by Dan Phelps
Original Music by Andy Gullahorn
Mix Engineer: Kevin Morris
Graphic Design: Amy Jones
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“Jesus cares for our troubles, but they don’t worry him.”
So says Alan Fadling, who joins host Steve Cuss on this episode of Being Human. Fadling is an author and the leader of Unhurried Living, a non-profit that trains people to rest deeper, live fuller and lead better. His latest book, The Non-Anxious Life, draws from spiritual formation and touches on systems theory, as well.
Cuss and Fadling discuss the ways that anxiety is not just a personal dynamic, but an organizational one. They consider what Dallas Willard had to say about anxiety and peace, how anxiety communicates that God is not there for us, and what it may look like to remember that Jesus is present with us. They talk about the differences in believing that “I am anxiety” and “I have anxiety.” And they consider how anxiety influences leadership, our sense of connection with Jesus, and our engagement with culture.
Tune in for an episode that sheds light on the way of peace.
Resources mentioned in this episode include:
Alan Fadling
The Non-Anxious Life: Experiencing the Peace of God's Presence by Alan Fadling
Unhurried Living
George Doebler
Bowen family systems theory
Edwin H. Friedman
Dallas Willard
Viktor Frankl
“Being Human with Steve Cuss” is a production of Christianity Today
Executive Produced by Erik Petrik and Mike Cosper
Produced and Edited by Matt Stevens
Associate Producers: McKenzie Hill, Raed Gilliam, and Abby Perry
Theme song by Dan Phelps
Original Music by Andy Gullahorn
Mix Engineer: Kevin Morris
Graphic Design: Amy Jones
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If you struggle to keep your thoughts to yourself in the internet age, you’re not alone. On this episode of Being Human, host Steve Cuss admits that he struggles with a core belief that sounds something like the world needs my opinion. What are Christians to do in an era when there’s nonstop opportunity to reply, comment, and react?
On this episode, Cuss welcomes someone he looks up to in this regard: Jay Kim, lead pastor of WestGate Church in San Jose, California and author of several books, including his latest, Listen, Listen, Speak. Kim and Cuss consider the implications of God as infinite and humans as finite and the immensity of eternity. They talk about Kim’s emphasis on listening, formative moments in his faith, and how he believes social media is shaping people. Their conversation covers spiritual practices that can help us remain rooted in a tumultuous era and points to the characteristics of God reflected in creatures and creation.
Resources mentioned in this episode include:
Jay Kim
WestGate Church
Analog Church: Why We Need Real People, Places, and Things in the Digital Age
Analog Christian: Cultivating Contentment, Resilience, and Wisdom in the Digital Age by Jay Y. Kim
Listen, Listen, Speak: Hearing God and Being Heard in a Noisy World by Jay Y. Kim
Gravity
Interstellar
Neil Postman
Hate Inc.: Why Today’s Media Makes Us Despise One Another by Matt Taibbi
The Art Institute of Chicago
Nighthawks by Edward Hopper
The Weight of Glory by C.S. Lewis
Bo Burnham: Inside
“The Ignatian Examen”
The Lord’s Prayer
Andy Crouch
Joshua Tree
“Being Human with Steve Cuss” is a production of Christianity Today
Executive Produced by Erik Petrik and Mike Cosper
Produced and Edited by Matt Stevens
Associate Producers: McKenzie Hill, Raed Gilliam, and Abby Perry
Theme song by Dan Phelps
Original Music by Andy Gullahorn
Mix Engineer: Kevin Morris
Graphic Design: Amy Jones
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So much of our experience is shaped by what gets passed down to us. Whether it's trauma, wisdom, or a signature hair color, traits and knowledge travel from generation to generation.
On this episode of Being Human, Steve Cuss welcomes George Dobeler, the chaplain who first passed down the concept of family systems theory to Cuss. Doebler and Cuss talk about Doebler's learning from Murray Bowen, who founded the theory. They discuss the importance of understanding one’s family system when it comes to diffusing anxiety. Doebler and Cuss provide real-life examples of systems theory helping people become less reactive and more in touch with God, themselves, and others.
Their conversation covers chaplaincy, trauma recovery, and how theology shapes our responses to anxiety.
Resources mentioned in this episode include:
Bowen family systems theory
George Doebler
Murray Bowen
Harry Stack Sullivan
Edwin H. Friedman
Genogram
Friedman’s Fables by Edwin H. Friedman
A Failure of Nerve: Leadership in the Age of the Quick Fix by Edwin H. Friedman
“Being Human with Steve Cuss” is a production of Christianity Today
Executive Produced by Erik Petrik and Mike Cosper
Produced and Edited by Matt Stevens
Associate Producers: McKenzie Hill, Raed Gilliam, and Abby Perry
Theme song by Dan Phelps
Original Music by Andy Gullahorn
Mix Engineer: Kevin Morris
Graphic Design: Amy Jones
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