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Whether we’re aware of them or not, beliefs drive much of our thinking, and, as a result, they drive a lot of our feelings and behaviours. All the things that influence our mental health.
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Something that I think is important to bear in mind about making decisions is the unavoidable truth that you will at some point make a mistake.
We need to be ok with that.Support the show
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For many, anxiety is all about being vulnerable to the possibility of rejection.
It's normal for our brain to seek out what we fear and notice dangerous possibilities. But those with bad experiences may have been primed from an early age to expect rejection by default.
Because of this, their brain is going to start perceiving rejection everywhere.
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Trauma is as close to a disability as you can get without being given a blue badge.
It paralyses people. Trauma genuinely alters the brain so much that people have to develop ways of living with it that end up creating behaviours and attitudes that can be dangerous.Support the show
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Last week I made an episode about quietening the mind specifically for sleep, and I got a few messages from patrons saying "That's all well and good but what about quietening it down the rest of the time?"
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There are times when our brain just can't seem to switch off.
Today we go through some ways to help you with that and hopefully get some good quality rest.Support the show
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Kindness is often linked with better mental health. It helps us to feel connected to others, creates a sense of belonging and reduces isolation.
But I say there's a time and a place for it, and it might not be now and it might start closer to home.Support the show
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"Awe" tends to be defined as the emotion we experience when encountering something with such perceived vastness that our brain might find it hard to comprehend how it can exist.
Being "awed" by an experience can have some surprisingly powerful, positive effects on us.
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Slow motion Droplet Collisions
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cNI-LIVs-toMusharaf Asghar overcoming his stammer.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tgZfLImT2gMStar Wars - Main Title. The Danish National Symphony Orchestra https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=we3VEI5pmqo
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In his letter from Birmingham Jail in 1963, after being arrested on the rather trumped up charge of marching without a permit, Martin luther king wrote, amongst other things, this quote. he said "There can be no deep disappointment where there is not deep love" in other words, if you feel disappointed it's only because you care about something.
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Often people will talk about the need to disappear away for a bit to "find themselves" when actually they already knew where they were they just didn't "know" themselves.
Well, maybe we don't need to climb a mountain or hide in a retreat for a week to do this. Maybe we can get to really know ourselves a little bit more every day until we're fully clued up.Support the show
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Research has shown that hope can significantly improve mental health outcomes. It boosts resilience, helps you to cope better with stress and setbacks and means that you're more likely to engage in positive behaviours that support your well-being.
But hope isn't something that just happens; it's something you might need to cultivate and it could even save your life.Support the show
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Are you living your life based on your values or your goals?
What's the difference anyway?
Let's find out.
Link to values list https://richardnicholls.net/?post=episode-238
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Gaslighting is a phrase we use to mean being manipulated and to have your reality questioned.
Cults have been doing it for decades, maybe even for thousands of years.
Today I'm going to scratch the surface a bit.
Come and have a listen.Support the show
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One thing we can all guarantee is that we'll all receive some sort of criticism at some point.
The trick is to not let it get under our skin. Easier said than done though, but don't let that stop you.Support the show
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When "future you" doesn't even exist, it can be really hard to stick to your plan in the "now" to ensure that future you gets their needs met.
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Back in 1995 when britpop ruled the charts and the UN designated it The United Nations Year for Tolerance, British Telecom started a friends and family service to make it cheaper to call a handful of your favourite people with the slogan It's Good To Talk.
Everyone agreed.
Hopefully we do still think that, don't we?Support the show
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If you've ever set a goal for yourself and then found yourself deliberately sticking a spanner in the works knowing full well it'll cause you to fail then welcome to the human race. Because everyone does it.
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I might not the young man I once was, but there is a certain childishness to me that I'm hoping can keep me young.
Looking at the studies into attitude and ageing the odds are in my favour!Support the show
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Having free will is generally thought of as a good thing but it also comes with responsibility.
That's why decisions cause anxiety, whether it's about the little things or the big things.
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Most people live their life based around making other people happy to some degree. It's just how far we take it that determines whether or not it becomes a problem.
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