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Today, we meet Everett as she learns of new Medieval Pop music, and the chaotic inner workings of who's in charge of music. The Affordables then must band together to stop a war between robots and skeletons in the Jungles of Bezos because Blake Dancer has a special sapling growing there. Are the Affordables up to the task? Yeah probably
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Posting early to give you something to alleviate Election Day Jitters! Vote Blue so we can flush the orange turd down once and for all *Episode Description and inspiration below**
We offer you a new kind of show with a title based on a time where Adam and Justin played with action figures as adults...and they made all the characters do dumb shit, have dumb voices, and complete dumb tasks. This was right around the time "The Expendables" was becoming a huge hit, and so Adam and Justin decided to call their ragtag team of militants, "The Affordables."
Now here we are in late 2024 releasing a blend of 80s-inspired retro bullshit with some modern bullshit with a flexible cast of characters. In this series, we are delighted to welcome back one of the original Rollplayers, David! He reprises his role as Luke "Chimichanga" Smith who needs to make some merc money after Sierra went down. We also see Justin make his appearance as Jack Lazer, an 80s action hero who was thawed out in the year 2024. Both of these men have responded to a Craigslist ad from Blake Dancer, a 19 year old game streamer who wants to prevent monsters from overtaking his favorite vacation spots.
Today, the Affordables will face an enemy of fluffy proportions.
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While investigating a string of murders, the gang meets someone from Stoop's past before heading to a seedy bar looking for leads! Will they get any closer to finding out who is out there melting people's heads?!
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There's a lot of murder and a lot of intrigue going on in Savage City and our heroes are on the case! That is of course once they stop fighting and going in the wrong direction!
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Snow and Stoop wrap up ruining a train in the desert and forget about their supposedly dead friend Evan who returns after a week of recuperation to find Snow has trashed his apartment. Then Stoop gets some bad news!
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Scheduling is a bit fucky at the moment, so enjoy a wonderful episode of timejail featuring our friend, Danny Guarantee! Meet Dr. Turtle, Uhhh Darius, and the familiar wooden face of Slappy Pete.
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Evan recovers from his near death experience among some scaley dudes while Snow and Stop stoop a train... wait.
If you like the song at the end, find more of Adam's music here: https://open.spotify.com/album/0n0fNVRX1uwxPorfykGteL?si=bvynGcAhS1OVA2KCg8C2Uw
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A call from some of Snow's past associates leads our trio back to the wasteland outside the city to heist a train but this train fights back and bad things happen! Listen! PLEASE! Check out Adam's new fitness training progam: https://www.fiverr.com/s/1q0wjW9
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We're back in Savage city and today Evan gets help from Stoop and Snowspear in his continued search for clues as to the whereabouts of his missing sister. This endeavor leads them to some cybernetic superhuman bullshit! Come on and listen!
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It's here...The bittersweet and very weird Finale of the original carnation of The Phony Express. Today, we see the final act, produced by Vanta Black, herself. Will the gang play their parts and put an end to Vanta's weird scheme? Let's find out, shall we! (oh, and welcome back to Kimmie for returning as Bella!)
Thanks for everything, gang. We're excited for more fun coming down the pipeline, but I feel like our original Phony Express story needed a fair chance to rest. We love that you enjoyed these characters and their really odd story. I know it went from kinda grounded to supernatural, but it was fun every step of the way. We love you guys.
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Howdy, friends! Today, Ryn finds that she is conflicted in her feelings to reunite with Cutter and Maverick. Mom and Dad says they're dangerous, but her counterpart's memories and feelings say otherwise. Also, the boys reunite in Dulltown (with Ryn eventually) to have their first conversation with Vanta Black. Ultimately, they will encountered actors who are roleplaying important moments of their lives to discover that Vanta knows more about them they ever realized.
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Today, we find out what Ryn was up to while the boys were navigating the scenery of Vanta Black's "sets."
Ryn goes on a "Trip" of sorts after helping out in the medical center. During her "ride" she meets Stephano the giant skeleton (or skelektion because Adrian had a typo) and Rim Dundrig, an "Aussie" Dwarf land pirate from Sinner's Canyon mine. We jump back and forth between the eyes of Ryn and her hallucinations (to escape reality) and what Rim sees. It was also honestly just fun to have a really out-of-the-box episode of Phony Express. Enjoy!Say hi to us! Review us
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Heya Gang! Today, Cutter awakens to some weird scenes and settings (literally) and Maverick makes a shocking discovery about the people of Freedom Hallow. When they reunite, tensions are high as the line between reality and fiction continue to be blurry.
We love you, Cass!
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Today, Cutter experiences a strange Haunted House with Sam and Dean, while Maverick slays some entertainers in Freedom Hallow. Finn becomes and Ryn and now wants Bowls Bowls Bowls and a vacation. Some weird stuff is going down and the boys are suspicious of the people in town. Also, how you doing everybody? You taking care of yourself? You better be!
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eeeeey Bella has divided the group and has plans to restore her baby to a more formidable form. Cutter encounters some weird brothers, Maverick attempts to free his best friend, and Finn grows up.
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Today, we've got a special guest (Kimmie) playing the role of someone special to little Finn. The gang must decide if this mysterious person is trustworthy as she relays information that the hostages have been strewn across northern Montana.
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Life's been crazy with technical issues abound, so we are presenting you with an episode of Timejail to keep you entertained while we sort life out!
Today, you'll meet a pilot sleuth, an awkward initiate, a summoned trickster, and a carbon copy of Mr. Bean! Enjoy the calamity that ensues when Cass and Justin play off our new guests: Will and Dusk!Click this if you love us! Rate the show wherever you listen, Pl0x!
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Hey hey! Tiny Finn and her silly gun-loving boy "Brave" seek out Cutter and Maverick to save Dr Punkenstein! Does Cutter care about anyone other than Bathy? *shrugs* Does Maverick want Justice? yeah dawg. Oh, also there's a dog
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Today, we discover the aftermath of our bionic friend's sacrifice. We meet a new little girl named... Finn? And the fellas "lay siege" to Cruelty Alley after discovering the loss of their comrade.
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