Episodi

  • Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg and I talk about...

    - Dr. Sarah and Dr. Rebecca sympathize with this mom and reflects on how great it would be if we could choose our kid’s friends - but offer a mindset shift for why that actually wouldn’t be healthy.

    - Who to turn to for support to help you determine what your best course of action might be.

    - A statement you can say to your child that can help you begin to understand why they may be exhibiting more clingy behaviors.

    - How to get to the root of your own anxieties and fears so you can determine what you might be projecting onto your kids versus what are actual issues they need support navigating.

    - What to avoid saying to your child that may unintentionally cause them to pull away from you.

    - A formula you can use (that works with children of all ages!) to help you know whether the questions you are asking your child will likely be helpful or may lead to increased pressure.

    ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:

    🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about fostering secure attachments in peer relationships with Dr. Eileen Kennedy-Moore

    🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about peer rejection

    🎧 Listen to my podcast episode that will help you empower your daughter with media, body image, and societal pressures with Dr. Jo-Ann Finkelstein

    WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:

    Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

  • When journalist and author Stephanie Foo was diagnosed with Complex Post-traumatic Stress Disorder (C-PTSD), she left her job and devoted herself to healing—a journey she chronicled in her bestselling memoir, What My Bones Know. Now, as a mother, she’s navigating what it means to parent with complex trauma, balancing the high-alert nervous system that comes with C-PTSD while trying to stay present for her child.

    In this powerful conversation, Stephanie shares:

    - The difference between PTSD and C-PTSD—and why relational healing is essential for many forms of trauma.

    - How motherhood reshapes the brain and why it can trigger fight-or-flight responses.

    - The unique challenges of rupture and repair with a child versus an adult.

    - Why parents with complex trauma may struggle with isolation and finding a supportive community can be so helpful.

    - The strategies that have helped Stephanie most, all of which are useful for any parent, with or without trauma.

    If you’ve ever felt like parenting is unearthing deep, unresolved parts of yourself, this episode offers both insight and hope.

    LEARN MORE ABOUT STEPHANIE:

    https://www.stephaniefoo.me/

    READ STEPHANIE'S BOOK:

    📚 What My Bones Know: A Memoir of Healing from Complex Trauma

    FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM:

    📱@foofoofoo

    📱 @drsarahbren

    ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:

    Why the "Still-Face" Experiment Was a Game-Changer

    The Strange Situation

    CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:

    🎧 186. Using presence as the antidote to trauma: How we begin to break cycles with Dr. Jacob Ham

    🎧 204. The science of “mom-rage” and how to use mindfulness as a tool for being less reactive with Diana Winston

    🎧 272. Maternal health, dyadic work, and IFS: Why specialized mental healthcare providers matter with Rebecca Geshuri and Paige Bellenbaum

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  • Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg and I talk about...

    - Dr. Sarah and Dr. Rebecca debate whether mom-guilt is inherent to all mothers or a societally structured construct (Spoiler: Dr. Rebecca wins this battle!)

    - The critical distinction between distress and guilt and why one can be a destructive grenade in parenting.

    - Releasing guilt is a form of activism - we're explaining why.

    - How to course correct once you’ve noticed you’re parenting from a space of guilt.

    - The question to ask yourself that can help guide your behaviors as a parent that come from a place of attunement and trust, rather than guilt or fear.

    - Using a “values-driven” distinction to help you determine the root reasons you are making certain decisions, and how bringing this into your consciousness can be helpful.

    ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:

    🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about turning parenthood into a career asset with Lauren Smith Brody

    🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about managing working parent guilt with Daisy Dowling

    🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about balancing parenthood, partnership, and work with Dr. Yael Schonbrun

    WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:

    Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

  • Girls are often sent messages that can leave them feeling unseen, unheard, and boxed in by societal expectations. How can we as parents help them challenge these limiting narratives and grow into their full potential?

    In this episode, I'm joined by Dr. Jo-Ann Finkelstein to explore:

    - How societal norms shape girls’ self-perception, from the “pink frilly dress” phase to body image struggles in their teens.

    - Research statistics that will blow your mind on everything from when gender bias begins, how widespread it is, and its impact on everything from what parents Google to how often girls and boys are called on in school.

    - How to examine and confront the gender stereotypes we unknowingly pass on to our kids when so much of it is unconscious.

    - Practical strategies to help kids understand and navigate the societal messages they encounter. Including a simple yet powerful hack for challenging gender roles when reading children’s books.

    - Actionable advice for fostering resilience and confidence in girls, as well as how to teach boys to work alongside girls to combat toxic masculinity.

    If you want to help your kids break free from limiting narratives and thrive as their authentic selves, this episode is a must-listen!

    LEARN MORE ABOUT DR. JO-ANN:

    https://www.joannfinkelstein.com/

    READ DR. JO-ANN'S BOOK:

    📚 Sexism & Sensibility: Raising Empowered, Resilient Girls in the Modern World

    JOIN JO-ANN'S SUBSTACK:

    📖 The Feminist Parent

    FOLLOW US ON SOCIAL MEDIA:

    📱@joannfinkelstein.phd @joannfinkelstein.phd

    📱@drsarahbren

    ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:

    📺 Ada Twist, Scientist

    📺 Vida the Vet

    CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:

    🎧 Secure attachment vs. social media: Navigating their effects on body image from early childhood to teen years with Dr. Miriam Steele

    🎧 How can I parent my daughter so she doesn't become a people pleaser?

    🎧 Raising emotionally intelligent sons: Parenting boys to combat "toxic masculinity" with Ruth Whippman

  • Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about...

    - Exactly when we’d recommend you tell your child that you're pregnant.

    - Why it’s important to help your child make sense of what is happening in their life—and the conclusions they can jump to if we don’t share things (in a developmentally appropriate manner) with them.

    - A conversation starter and basic script you can use to introduce this concept to your young child.

    - How these dynamics can change depending on if it’s the second, third, or fourth baby you’re welcoming.

    - The types of topics you want to try to cover (and which ones to try to avoid) when you first tell your child you are pregnant.

    ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:

    🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about going from one to two with Lindsay Ellingson

    🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about pregnancy, postpartum, and early parenthood with Dr. Jessica Vernon

    🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about what to do during pregnancy to make you less vulnerable to postpartum anxiety

    🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about movement during pregnancy and beyond with Dr. Megan Roche

    WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:

    Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

  • Grief isn’t something we get over—it’s something we integrate. Joining me to discuss this and the best way to support children through profound loss is Dr. Dan Wolfson, a clinical psychologist specializing in grief.

    In this episode we explore:

    - The skills needed for fostering resilience and helping children and adults learn to grieve in a healthy manner.

    - The importance of “oscillation” through grief and how Dr. Dan works with his patients to help them learn to process their feelings without these emotions completely overtaking them.

    - How to help determine when and how it’s time for your child (or you) to go back to things like extracurricular activities, birthday parties, and other “normal” ways of reengaging with life.

    - Parents are often hesitant to show their own grief to their children, however, this can be a helpful form of modeling. We discuss appropriate ways to share your emotions with your child.

    - Typical behaviors and regressions we often see in children who are processing profound sadness and difficult emotions, so you know what to be on the lookout for.

    If you or your child are navigating profound loss, this conversation is here to remind you that healing isn’t linear, and you don’t have to do it alone.

    LEARN MORE ABOUT DR. DAN:

    https://www.wolfsontherapy.com/danwolfson

    LEARN MORE ABOUT EXPERIENCE CAMPS:

    https://experiencecamps.org/about-us

    FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM:

    📱@wolfsontherapy

    📱 @drsarahbren

    ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:

    👉🏻 Click here to lean more about support options at Upshur Bren Psychology Group and to schedule a free 15-minute consultation call to learn more about the available resources for your unique needs.

    📚 The Invisible String

    CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:

    🎧 192. Death, grief, and parenting: How we can help our kids make sense of and make peace with death with Rabbi Steve Leder

    🎧 194. Confronting death to find a deeper meaning in life: A continuation of my conversation with Rabbi Steve Leder

    🎧 70. Helping children process, accept and understand death with death doula Heather Hogan

  • Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg and I talk about...

    - First things first, why are schools still sending out candy grams in this current climate with a loneliness epidemic on the rise?

    - Cliques and posses that form in middle school are often rife with envy, jealousy, gossip, and temptation - how to help our kids navigate this.

    - What advice to give your child when they are left out in a friend group.

    - How to help a child who tends to avoid conflict in their interpersonal relationships build a greater tolerance for joining in and addressing things directly.

    - “There is a difference between a kid who says 'I am going to let this go' vs. 'I am going to hold this in.'"

    - Understanding “social currency” and how that impacts children, especially as they move into the stage of development where their attention begins to move away from their parents and much more heavily toward their peers.

    ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:

    🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about talking with your teen with Elizabeth Bennett

    🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about respond to your child who you think is bullying other kids

    🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about social media's impact on your child's attachment security with Dr. Miriam Steele

    WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:

    Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

  • Do you know the signs of postpartum depression? Many parents (and even medical professionals) often miss diagnosing new mothers with a perinatal mood and anxiety disorder. Here to help shed light on this important topic is Board-Certified OB/GYN and author of the upcoming book, Then Comes Baby, Dr. Jessica Vernon.

    In this episode we explore:

    - Why postpartum mental health conditions are so often overlooked—even in medical training.

    - The types of questions Dr. Jessica started asking her prenatal and postpartum patients that allowed them the space to open up and reveal the struggles they were experiencing.

    - How the 6-week check-in after birth become the standard practice and what birthing people can expect of their bodies and minds at the 6-week mark.

    - Why women experiencing mental health struggles in postpartum are so prone to feelings of guilt and shame - even though there is no difference between medical risks and mental health risks, as a society we tend to attach more shame to mental health challenges.

    - What is matrescence and how is it revolutionizing the way we view early motherhood.

    - Managing our expectations with the realization that reality and our fantasies often don’t match up and how that can cause struggles - from birth, to feeding, postpartum, and early parenthood.

    - Free moms groups, books, and other resources for expecting and new parents.

    Whether you’re pregnant, newly postpartum, or a professional working with new parents, this episode offers essential insights into how we can improve postpartum care and support maternal mental health.

    LEARN MORE ABOUT DR. JESSICA:

    https://www.drjessicavernon.com/

    PRE-ORDER DR. JESSICA'S BOOK:

    📚 Then Comes Baby: An Honest Conversation about Birth, Postpartum, and the Complex Transition to Parenthood

    ARE YOU A MENTAL HEALTH PROFESSIONAL?

    Go to upshurbren.com/IFSTraining to register for The Good Mom/Bad Mom Loop, a 3-hour workshop on 2/27 designed to teach professionals how to integrate Internal Family Systems concepts into maternal mental health services to provide improved support for moms.

    FOLLOW US ON SOCIAL MEDIA:

    📱 @drsarahbren

    📱 @dr.jessicavernon, Jessica Vernon, Jessica Vernon, MD, FACOG, PMH-C

    ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:

    📚 Ordinary Insanity: Fear and the Silent Crisis of Motherhood in America

    📚 Matrescence: On Pregnancy, Childbirth, and Motherhood

    ✨ Postpartum Support International

    CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:

    🎧 Going back to work after baby: Maintaining a healthy and secure attachment bond

    🎧 How to lighten the load in pregnancy and postpartum with Dr. Sterling

    🎧 A breakdown of perinatal mood and anxiety disorders (PMADs)

    🎧 Sex after baby - Part I and Part II

  • Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Emily Upshur and I talk about...

    - Even if we aren’t adding more pressure onto our kids, the world often pushes external achievements on them - how can parents push back against this?

    - Why trying to problem-solve with your child may seem like it’s supporting them, but could actually be perpetuating their anxiety.

    - The one pillar you can use as a parent to guide all your interactions with your child that can help to defuse the pressure they feel, rather than inadvertently adding to it.

    - Saying grades don’t matter is like saying, “throw your sense of control out the window.” What to say instead.

    - Our society glorifies perfectionism, but in reality, kids who engage in highly perfectionist tendencies tend to have higher anxiety and internalize their stress, which can lead to missed signs that they need support. What are the signs they are crossing a concerning threshold of perfectionism?

    - We describe a helpful thought exercise you can try with your child today.

    WANT ADDITIONAL SUPPORT?

    👉🏻 Click here to lean more about support options at Upshur Bren Psychology Group and to schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to learn more about the available resources for your unique needs.

    ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:

    🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the hidden dangers of an achievement centric approach with Jennifer Breheny Wallace

    🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about learning style myths with Dr. Dan Willingham

    🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about helping your child cope with anxiety with Dr. Terri Bacow

    WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:

    Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

  • How does attachment security relate to codependency? The Codependent Perfectionist, Alana Carvalho, LMHC, is here to explore just that!

    In this episode, we cover it all:

    - How does codependency fit into the attachment system?

    - Does this sound like what you're struggling with in your relationship? We're reviewing some of the most common challenges partners face when one person is more avoidant, and the other is more anxious.

    - Challenging perceptions of what is necessary in a relationship. When we see the world through dysfunctional patterns, we are often unaware of this dysfunction.

    - The differences between missatunement versus misperception and how understanding this difference can help us get on the same page on both!

    - A tangible exercise you can do with your partner to help you create a stronger dynamic (and why this works to not kick up a threat response, and helps them stay engaged in the conversation more successfully.)

    Whether you’re struggling with relational patterns or looking to better understand your partner, this episode offers powerful insights and tools for cultivating healthier relationships.

    LEARN MORE ABOUT ALANA:

    https://www.alanacarvalho.com/

    TAKE THE QUIZ:

    https://www.alanacarvalho.com/the-codependent-perfectionist-quiz/

    READ ALANA'S BOOK:

    📚 Raising Empowered Children: The Codependent Perfectionist’s Guide to Parenting

    FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM:

    @thecodependentperfectionist

    @drsarahbren

    ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:

    🎧 Listen to Alana's first Securely Attached episode, Recognizing and overcoming codependency in parenthood

    CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:

    🎧 Breaking the cycle of insecure attachment: How to support your child's secure attachment even if you didn't grow up with Dr. Miriam Steele

    🎧 Can my kid be securely attached to me if I'm insecurely attached in my adult relationships?

    🎧 Secure attachment is optimal, but insecure attachment may not be as bad as we think with Dr. Or Dagan

  • Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg and I talk about...

    - Breaking down the difference between having differing political view points versus someone having extremist views.

    - How the health of our relationships with our parents is often intertwined with our relationship with ourselves, our kids, and our entire family system.

    - How to manage feeling lost, un-seen, and destabilized when a parent shifts to being less of a secure attachment figure.

    - Does this change in your parent's views and values mean you have to throw out all the things you have learned from them that inform your approach to raising your own kids?

    - When it’s best to try to compartmentalize things your parent might say, and when it’s necessary to hold firm boundaries.

    - Learn Dr. Sarah's simple framework for setting and holding effective boundaries.

    ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:

    🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about setting boundaries with your in-laws

    🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about fostering deep and meaningful realationshisp with Dr. Rick Hanson

    🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about mindfulness with Diana Winston

    WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:

    Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

  • Music therapist Vered Benhorin is teaching parents how they can use play and music as powerful tools to strengthen connection, foster attachment, and make parenting feel a little easier.

    In this episode, we explore:

    - Why play is so important for emotional regulation, attachment, and connection—and how parents who don’t naturally enjoy play can redefine what it looks like.

    - What are “Bubble Moments,” and how can parents tap into these times throughout the day to deepen their relationship with their child?

    - How music impacts the brain, reinforcing neural networks that support routines, emotional regulation, and even executive functioning skills.

    - The science behind a “sing-song” voice and why it feels so regulating for both you and your child.

    - How to expand your definition of play to find activities that feel fun and authentic for you as a parent.

    Whether you’re looking to strengthen your bond with your child, better understand attachment theory, or discover simple ways to use music and play to make parenting more joyful, this episode is packed with insights and practical advice you won’t want to miss!

    LEARN MORE ABOUT VERED:

    https://www.babyintune.com/

    READ VERED'S NEW BOOK:

    📚 What Do I Do with My Baby All Day?!: Simple Ways to Have the Best First Year Together

    LISTEN TO VERED'S MUSIC:

    🎵 Listen on Spotify

    ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:

    👉🏻 Download my free guide, Strengthen Your Child's Emotion Regulation Skills Through Play, to help your child learn to calm their brains and bodies.

    CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:

    🎧 How parents can use music as an emotion regulator with Vered Benhorin

    🎧 Breaking the cycle of insecure attachment: How to support your child's secure attachment even if you didn't grow up with it, with Dr. Miriam Steele

    🎧 A 10-year-old’s take on starting a new school year, navigating friendships, and what he wants every parent to keep in mind

  • Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg and I talk about...

    - What does it mean to be “nesting” during a divorce?

    - What types of logistical and emotional factors to consider to help you determine if this is a good choice for your family.

    - What are the pros and cons of nesting for kids (and for you!)

    - How to help kids feel secure during a separation, whether you’ve decided to nest with your ex or not.

    - A script for helping your child understand the difference between love in a parent-child relationship and love in a romantic adult relationship. This distinction can help kids who may be worried that they will get left too.

    ARE YOU A MENTAL HEALTH PROFESSIONAL?

    Go to upshurbren.com/IFSTraining to register for The Good Mom/Bad Mom Loop, a 3-hour workshop on 2/27 designed to teach professionals how to integrate Internal Family Systems concepts into maternal mental health services to provide improved support for moms.

    ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:

    🎧 Listen to my podcast episode busting some common misconceptions about divorce with Michelle Dempsey-Multack

    🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about parenting with a narcissist

    🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about what to do after you and your partner have a big fight in front of your kids

    WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:

    Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

  • Sibling relationships are some of the longest-lasting and most influential relationships in our lives, but they’re also filled with complexity. Dr. Jonathan Caspi, a renowned expert on sibling relationships, is breaking down the fascinating science behind sibling dynamics and sharing actionable advice for parents.

    In this episode we explore:

    - The surprising science behind why if you give two siblings and two strangers personality tests, the siblings wouldn't be any more similar than the strangers.

    - The importance of neutrality in parental interventions with siblings and how this can prevent feelings of favoritism and resentment.

    - Practical strategies for managing sibling conflict: Like what to say in the heat of the moment to support their problem-solving skills, what to focus on (and what to ignore) to build closeness and empathy, and how to know it's time to get involved vs. when to let them work it out themselves, and more!

    - How to respond if your child struggles when you bring a new baby home with methods that foster closeness and decrease rivalry.

    - Insider versus outsider status: How parents can unintentionally create sibling rivalry, and what to do instead.

    - The vital importance of parental regulation and how to stay calm when our “mama bear” instincts are triggered.

    Whether you’re trying to navigate sibling squabbles, encourage connection, or simply understand the dynamics at play in your own family, this episode is packed with fascinating insights and practical tools you won't want to miss!

    LEARN MORE ABOUT DR. JONATHAN CASPI:

    https://siblingexpert.com/

    READ DR. JONATHAN'S BOOK:

    📚 Sibling Aggression: Assessment and Treatment

    FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM:

    @siblingexpert

    @drsarahbren

    ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:

    Research Study: Why are siblings so different?

    CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:

    🎧 Understanding parental dysregulation: How to identify and manage your triggers with Dr. Amber Thornton

    🎧 The science of “mom-rage” and how to use mindfulness as a tool for being less reactive with Diana Winston

    🎧 Raising emotionally intelligent sons: Parenting boys to combat "toxic masculinity" with Ruth Whippman

    🎧 Getting on the same page as your partner in parenting

  • Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg and I talk about...

    - What is developmentally typical for 2-year-olds when it comes to manners and patience?

    - Understanding impulse control, joint attention, and attunement - and how to use these 3 things to help you know how to respond to your child when they are demanding your attention.

    - When to pause to validate your child's desire, and when it’s okay to ignore their request.

    - How to help your child tolerate waiting (no matter how big their reaction is to being told they need to wait.)

    - How to collaboratively problem solve with your child to come up with strategies around what they CAN do to interrupt you when they need your attention.

    ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:

    🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about parenting a toddler with the co-authors of the Terrific Toddlers series, Carol Zeavin and Rhona Silverbush

    🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about responding to your child who loses their cool when they get frustrated

    🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about appropriate consequences when your child doesn't listen to you

    🎧 Listen to my podcast about how to keep your child from becoming a spoiled brat

    WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:

    Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

  • What role do early attachment relationships play in shaping who we become? In this episode, Dr. Alan Sroufe, a pioneering researcher in attachment, shares decades of insights from his groundbreaking longitudinal study.

    Together we explore:

    - How Dr. Sroufe’s research answered the question: Do early experiences leave a lasting legacy?

    - Why resilience isn’t just about thriving in the face of adversity, but is deeply rooted in the strength of attachment relationships.

    - The importance of early relationships in helping children develop a sense of safety, positive self-worth, and durable relationships.

    - A hopeful message that attachment isn't fixed and that secure relationships in adolescence and adulthood can change developmental trajectories, even after challenging childhoods.

    - Why the quality, not quantity, of time with your child matters most (and what babies can teach us about connection).

    - How parents can help shape the meaning children make of their world and guide them through challenges with empathy.

    Dr. Sroufe’s work shows that while early experiences are never erased, they’re always building blocks for growth—and recovery is always possible.

    READ THE BOOK DR. ALAN'S RECOMMENDS PARENTS START WITH:

    📚 A Compelling Idea: How We Become the Persons We Are

    ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:

    👉🏻 Click HERE to download my free guide, The Four Pillars of Fostering Secure Attachment, helping you parent with a focus on attunement and trust.

    GET MY ON-DEMAND COURSE FOR PARENTING SENSITIVE CHILDREN:

    👉🏻 Learn more about Parenting by Design, my guided program for increasing behavioral and emotional regulation in sensitive kids.

    CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:

    🎧 Breaking the cycle of insecure attachment: How to support your child's secure attachment even if you didn't grow up with it with Dr. Miriam Steele

    🎧 Secure attachment is optimal, but insecure attachment may not be as bad as we think with Dr. Or Dagan

    🎧 How to use the principles of attachment science to make parenting easier

    🎧 Can my kid be securely attached to me if I'm insecurely attached in my adult relationships?

  • Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Emily Upshur and I talk about...

    - It can be tricky to maintain relationships when you’re in different stages of life from your friends and it’s common for some to atrophy after you become a parent.

    - Unpacking all the feelings you may have about this: fear, guilt, grief, and more!

    - Practical strategies for creating a simple routine that is easy for you to maintain, but will also allow you to keep these relationships from going too long without any checkins.

    - When you are changed by motherhood, you may slip into black-and-white thinking with regard to your friendships. We offer you a perspective shift you can use to challenge that.

    - How to check in with yourself so you can understand the root of your desires for connection, which will help you create realistic anchors that will actually meet your needs.

    - Time management and scheduling hacks that can help you be intentional about protecting the time you do have.

    - How to repair bonds with friends who may feel hurt, slighted, or abandoned by you.

    ARE YOU A MENTAL HEALTH PROFESSIONAL?

    Go to upshurbren.com/IFSTraining to register for The Good Mom/Bad Mom Loop, a 3-hour workshop on 2/27 designed to teach professionals how to integrate Internal Family Systems concepts into maternal mental health services to provide improved support for moms.

    ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:

    🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the science of “mom-rage” with Diana Winston

    🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about identifying and managing your triggers with Dr. Amber Thornton

    🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about finding balance with Chelsi Jo

    🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about overcoming parental burnout

    WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:

    Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

  • Discover how maternal mental health care is evolving and why specialized support is critical for mothers with Paige Bellenbaum, LCSW, PMH-C and Rebecca Geshuri, LMFT, PMH-C.

    In this episode we explore:

    - What dyadic work is and how this can be especially beneficial for mothers and birthing people for developing a bond with their child.

    - How Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy can support mothers in addressing their inner “mom parts” that contribute to feelings of failure and overwhelm.

    - How polarized parts and perfectionism can create distress in motherhood and how embracing a “both-and” mentality can offer relief and self-compassion.

    - The questions to ask when looking for a provider to ensure they’re trained in maternal mental health and understand the complexities of this life stage.

    - Why it's so important for pediatricians, OBGYNs, or anyone who often comes into contact with birthing parents to have even a basic understanding of this transformative experience.

    Whether you’re a mother seeking support, a professional working with birthing parents, or simply someone invested in breaking the stigma around mental health and motherhood, this episode is filled with practical insights you won't want to miss.

    REGISTER FOR THE TRAINING ON FEB. 27:

    Go to upshurbren.com/IFSTraining to register for this 3-hour workshop designed to teach professionals how to integrate Internal Family Systems concepts into maternal mental health services to provide improved support for moms.

    LEARN MORE ABOUT THE MOTHERHOOD CENTER:

    https://themotherhoodcenter.com/

    LEARN MORE ABOUT REBECCA:

    https://www.rebeccageshurilmft.com/get-to-know-me

    ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:

    Postpartum Support International

    Ghosts in the Nursery: A Psychoanalytic Approach to the Problems of Impaired Infant-Mother Relationships

    LISTEN TO PAIGE & REBECCA'S PAST EPISODES:

    🎧 Using Internal Family Systems to emotionally support mothers with the creators of The Mothercentric Approach

    🎧 Preventing tragedy and shining a light on postpartum psychosis: What it is, what it's not, and how to find support for yourself or a loved one with Paige Bellenbaum

  • Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Emily Upshur and I talk about...

    - How to best approach daycare transitions and is there a right or a wrong answer to this question?

    - The most important questions to ask yourself to determine which of these scenarios will be easiest for your unique child.

    - Is it better to have a single, potentially steeper transition or a slower, more incremental transition?

    - The key things to consider (like sleep habits, separation anxiety, etc.) to help you determine which is best for your individual situation.

    - Zooming out to see how this change will impact the entire family system and adding these factors into your decision making process.

    REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:

    📚 Transitioning to a new daycare

    ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:

    🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about turning parenthood into a career asset with Lauren Smith Brody

    🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about helping child with separation anxiety

    🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about being a working parent with Daisy Dowling

    WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:

    Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!

  • Neha Ruch is sharing strategies for embracing flexibility as you balance, shift, and grow in both your career and parenthood.

    In this episode we explore:

    - How to redefine what “career” means to you at this stage of life and navigate the evolving roles of being a working or stay-at-home parent.

    - Why downshifting your career can be a valuable smaller step if you're not ready to take a full pause.

    - Preparing for this transition to feel less overwhelming—emotionally, financially, and in terms of your shifting identity.

    - Supporting women in feeling validated and respected in their choices to dial up or down in their careers.

    - How motherhood can be a time to foster creativity and the importance of staying connected to what brings you joy—whether it's for work or personal fulfillment.

    - A good first step for moms who don’t know where to begin in making this shift.

    - What a “family administration” meeting is and how to evaluate what’s working and what’s not—giving yourself permission to let go of what isn’t serving you.

    Don't miss this episode that will help you redefine what career means to you!

    LEARN MORE ABOUT NEHA:

    https://www.motheruntitled.com/

    READ NEHA'S NEW BOOK:

    📚 The Power Pause: How to Plan a Career Break After Kids--and Come Back Stronger Than Ever

    ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:

    🎧 Listen to Neha's first Securely Attached episode, Redefining what it means to be a stay-at-home parent with Neha Ruch

    📱 I sang my sister’s praise in this episode! Check out @mychicnest to follow along with her interior design account.

    CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:

    🎧 Going back to work after baby: Maintaining a healthy and secure attachment bond Q&A with Dr. Emily Upshur

    🎧 Turning parenthood into a career asset for working moms and dads with The Fifth Trimester’s Lauren Smith Brody

    🎧 What it means to be a working parent today: Challenging parental guilt, managing your time, and setting effective boundaries with Daisy Dowling