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We are hosting a Marriage Getaway 2025 on the beautiful beaches of Jamaica from January 11-18, and we want you to join us!
Click Here for information and you can email us directly: [email protected]
Come to Jamaica with us!
https://traveljoy.com/bookings/iNLp6gac9QCJDi2Epm4KTSmu
https://www.audreyclub.com/https://www.bobandaudrey.com/
https://www.audreyclub.com/
https://www.bobandaudrey.com/
Music by lemonmusicstudio from Pixabay.
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We are hosting a Marriage Getaway 2025 on the beautiful beaches of Jamaica from January 11-18, and we want you to join us! Click Here for information and you can email us directly: [email protected]
https://www.audreyclub.com/
https://www.bobandaudrey.com/
Music by lemonmusicstudio from Pixabay.
The Story Iâm Telling Myself About YouHave you ever caught yourself making up stories about what someone you love is thinking or feeling, without ever asking them? We all do it. When someone we care about is quiet, distant, or does something we donât understand, our minds automatically start filling in the blanks. We imagine what might be going on, sometimes assuming the worst. But these stories we tell ourselves can lead to misunderstandings, hurt feelings, and emotional distance.
What if, instead of guessing or assuming, we shared these stories with the person we love? Imagine saying, âThis is the story Iâm telling myself about you right now,â and using that phrase to start a real, honest conversation. This simple sentence has the power to stop assumptions in their tracks and bring us closer to the people we care about by helping us get on the same page. Itâs a great way to break the cycle of misunderstanding, build trust, and foster deeper connections.
Owning Your Own NarrativeBefore you ever have this conversation with someone you love, itâs important to first have it with yourself. The phrase âThis is the story Iâm telling myselfâ encourages self-awareness. It helps you acknowledge that youâre responsible for the stories you tell yourself and that these stories are just one interpretation of reality. Often, when we feel hurt or frustrated, itâs easy to blame the other person for what we think is happening. But by owning your own narrative, you take a moment to reflect and realize that the story may be shaped by your own feelings or insecurities, not by what the other person is actually doing.
This shift is important because it moves the focus away from blaming someone else and puts it on understanding your own internal process. It encourages you to pause, recognize that the way youâre interpreting the situation may not be the full truth, and approach the conversation with a mindset of curiosity rather than accusation. By owning your story first, you open the door to a more honest, understanding dialogue that allows both of you to connect more deeply.
The Stories We Tell OurselvesIn our relationships with family, friends, or anyone we care about, itâs easy to create stories in our heads when we donât know all the facts. When someoneâs behavior or words are unclear, we might start making up explanations that are influenced by our own worries or past experiences. For example, if someone you love is unusually quiet, you might think, âTheyâre upset with me,â when in reality, they might just be tired or distracted.
These stories are often just guesses, but they can feel real to us. Without checking if theyâre true, we act on these assumptions. Using the phrase, âThis is the story Iâm telling myself about you,â allows us to stop and share our feelings in a way that invites understanding. Itâs a way of saying, âThis is what Iâm thinking, but I might be wrongâcan you help me understand?â This gives the other person a chance to explain, and you both have the opportunity to clear things up before misunderstandings take root.
The Impact of AssumptionsWhen we act on these assumptions without checking if theyâre true, it can lead to real problems. You might end up feeling hurt, misunderstood, or even angry about something that wasnât happening at all. These misunderstandings, left unchecked, can grow, causing emotional distance and making it harder to connect with the people we love.
A lot of times, the stories we tell ourselves come from our own insecurities or fears. If weâve been hurt in the past, we might assume the worst, even when it isnât happening. Without addressing these feelings, they can create unnecessary tension in our relationships. If we donât talk about whatâs really going on, we risk building walls that keep us from understanding each other.
How to Break the Habit of AssumingThe phrase âThis is the story Iâm telling myself about youâ can help break this habit of making assumptions. It allows us to pause and think about what weâre really feeling before reacting. Instead of assuming we know what the other person is thinking, we share our thoughts and feelings openly, creating room for a real conversation.
This phrase works because it invites both people to share their perspectives. It encourages us to ask questions and be curious, rather than jumping to conclusions. Instead of reacting based on a story weâve created in our minds, we can check in with the other person and get to the truth. When weâre curious rather than assuming, weâre more likely to understand each other and avoid unnecessary conflict.
Building Closer ConnectionsUsing this phrase also takes a bit of courage. It means admitting that we donât have all the answers, and that can feel vulnerable. But that vulnerability can lead to deeper trust and stronger connections. When weâre open and honest about how we feel, it makes the people we love feel safe to do the same.
Itâs easy to react out of fear or frustration when weâre unsure about something. But instead of reacting, we can pause and ask, âIs this really true? Or is this just the story Iâm telling myself?â By choosing to be curious and checking in with someone you love, you avoid unnecessary arguments and build stronger, healthier relationships. Being honest about your thoughts and inviting clarity fosters understanding and emotional closeness.
How You Can Start TodayIf you notice that youâre starting to make up stories in your head about someone you love, try using this phrase to check in with yourself first and then with them. Instead of jumping to conclusions, take a moment to reflect on what youâre feeling. Share it with them using, âThis is the story Iâm telling myself about you right now,â and see how it opens the door to an honest conversation.
When we stop assuming and start asking for clarity, we build trust and get closer to the people we care about. These conversations may feel uncomfortable at first, but they can help us grow and strengthen our relationships. The next time you feel unsure, try using this phrase to break the habit of making assumptions, and watch how it transforms your connection with those you love.
Scripture to Reflect On:
Philippians 4:8 â "Think about things that are true, noble, and worthy of praise."Romans 12:2 â "Let your mind be transformed so you can know Godâs will."Proverbs 4:23 â "Guard your heart, because everything you do flows from it."Psalm 19:14 â "Let the words I speak and the thoughts in my heart be pleasing to you, God."By using this simple communication tool, you can prevent misunderstandings and strengthen your relationships with the people you love. Building trust and fostering open conversations with those around you will create more meaningful and connected relationships.
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Fehlende Folgen?
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https://www.audreyclub.com/
https://www.bobandaudrey.com/
Music by lemonmusicstudio from Pixabay.
Join us, Bob and Audrey Meisner, for an unforgettable marriage retreat experience at Couples Tower Isle in Jamaica!
https://traveljoy.com/bookings/iNLp6gac9QCJDi2Epm4KTSmu
Every relationship carries within it a dreamâa vision of deep connection, mutual understanding, and unshakeable trust. This dream is not just a fantasy; it is a tangible reality that can be achieved when two essential elements come together: sensitivity and security. Together, these create the foundation for a healthy, fulfilling partnership that allows love to thrive.
Sensitivity + Security = The Relationship Dream
The Key Takeaway:
Sensitivity is a beautiful and necessary component of a strong relationship, but it must be paired with security to truly flourish. Without security, sensitivity can trigger insecurities and lead to destructive patterns. Therefore, building a secure foundation of trust and self-assurance is essential for any relationship to thrive.
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Jamaican Retreat 2025 January 11-18
with Bob & Audrey Meisner
https://traveljoy.com/bookings/iNLp6gac9QCJDi2Epm4KTSmu
Things to Note:
Daily Sessions with Bob & AudreyAfternoons and evenings are yours to enjoy at your leisureReserve your spot early as availability is limited to 10 couplesThis is a beautiful and luxurious All-Inclusive ExperienceExperience the Joy of Life and Love! Laughing and cherishing every moment together as a couple isnât just a wishâit can become your reality!Anticipate the heartfelt Renewal of Your Vows, a truly unforgettable moment.âšPlus, enjoy ample free time to bask in the sunshine, reconnect, and dream big for your marriage!Space is limited, so secure your spot soon!https://www.audreyclub.com/
https://www.bobandaudrey.com/
Music by lemonmusicstudio from Pixabay.
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https://www.audreyclub.com/
https://www.bobandaudrey.com/
Music by Bohdan Kuzmin from Pixabay
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https://www.audreyclub.com/
https://www.bobandaudrey.com/
Music by Bohdan Kuzmin from Pixabay
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God has given us gifts to enrich our lives and the lives of those around us. It is through giving and receiving gifts that we can experience security, comfort, ease, and enjoyment in our relationships.
In this series, you will learn how reframing our relationships and perspectives can lead to a profound shift in how we experience life. Foundational to our growth steps is to recognize and experience that our joy comes from the life of God within, and not from external sources, we can find happiness and contentment in every moment. With intention and regaining our power of choice, we can reframe our thinking, we can develop and grow in our journey towards a life of promise full of abundance. -
EP175: When I feel like Iâm failingâŠ
I know⊠it sounds so dramatic, but itâs easy to feel like we have failed as parents when we feel unappreciated or even attacked or blamed. This week, we faced some unexpected disappointments, and insecurity stepped in and initiated negative narratives that were (very) short of hopefulness. But it was a quick turnaround!
Every setback in any relationship is an opportunity for growth and every contrast we encounter is a chance to come back even stronger. And most of all, more secure.
The next time you feel contrast, in other words, something that is clearly NOT your preference, itâs the perfect time to give yourself a pass, and then find the golden nuggets of wisdom that will make you brighter, stronger, wiser, shinier, and more resilient than ever.
The first thing to remember after experiencing a contrasting disappointment is to remember that you have a choice. You can attach your meaning to the situation. If you can embrace your security in Godâs friendship and reassure yourself of the gift your personality is, you can tell yourself a story of redemption and restoration. In every and any situation. This is powerful news!
When we feel judged, we tend to quickly judge that person back. When we react out of a broken heart, we will continue to project judgments on the people around us to feel better about ourselves. This is what keeps us stuck.
We can develop the skill and compassion to carry one anotherâs feelings of pain, rather than correct them. Thereâs a season of understanding and validating that is extremely helpful, and is an effective way to show unconditional love.
Research shows that the happiest and most satisfied people are those who see their loved ones in a positive lightâŠmany times even more positively than they see themselves! A highly thought of person is a well-loved person.
You can learn to change your mind⊠and your relationships will change. Instead of a fixed mindset (This will never change!) we encourage you to develop a growth mindset! (I can adjust!). Problems feel huge at the moment, but when your mindset adjusts, your choice is engaged, and the âproblemâ loses its âhugenessâ and power.
Integrity and Intent coupled together create hope and trust. And when that integrity is strong, and foundationally sound, itâs the perfect place to let your imagination dream with new ideas and tap into wondrous possibilities!
Great Ideas to Ponder:
What do you think about yourself?How or what do you think about your spouse/family members?What is one of the purposes of your marriage/family relationships?What are your current thoughts and feelings toward your most significant relationships?Start today, plan that one thing you never thought you could, and do something about it.When we make bold dreams, and our hearts are willing and surrender to Godâs ways and God's thoughts, we milk life for everything itâs got for us! So letâs apply this to our lives in a very practical way. Letâs squeeze the best out of every situation and refuse to waste our pain. And when we arenât perfect, and life isnât perfect, we give ourselves a HUGE PASS and say, I shall hunt for the treasure here and learn to love better every day.
https://www.bobandaudrey.com/
https://www.audreyclub.com/
Music by Bohdan Kuzmin from Pixabay
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https://www.audreyclub.com/
https://www.bobandaudrey.com/
Music by Bohdan Kuzmin from Pixabay
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https://www.audreyclub.com/
https://www.bobandaudrey.com/
Music by Bohdan Kuzmin from Pixabay
-
https://www.audreyclub.com/
https://www.bobandaudrey.com/
Music by lemonmusicstudio from Pixabay.
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https://www.audreyclub.com/
https://www.bobandaudrey.com/
Music by lemonmusicstudio from Pixabay.
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https://www.bobandaudrey.com/
https://www.audreyclub.com/
Music by lemonmusicstudio from Pixabay.
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https://www.audreyclub.com/
Music by lemonmusicstudio from Pixabay.
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Podcast by bobandaudrey.com
Music by lemonmusicstudio from Pixabay.
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Podcast by bobandaudrey.com
Music by lemonmusicstudio from Pixabay.
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https://www.bobandaudrey.com/
www.audreyclub.com
Music by lemonmusicstudio from Pixabay.
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BobandAudrey.com
AudreyClub.com
Music by lemonmusicstudio from Pixabay.
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Music by lemonmusicstudio from Pixabay.
https://www.audreyclub.com/
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Break Free from Unhealthy Ties
When helping people in their relationships, we find people continually asking for a deeper connection, so that their love, support, and companionship are received and reciprocal. By breaking free from the shackles of unhealthy ties to agendas, comparisons, and vices, individuals can foster relationships that are grounded in authenticity, mutual respect, and personal growth. These healthier connections not only enhance emotional well-being but also serve as a foundation for a more fulfilling and harmonious life.
Beneath the surface of seemingly healthy relationships, there can exist toxic elements that hinder personal growth and emotional well-being. Letâs identify these and break any unhealthy ties to agendas, comparisons, and vices that can taint our relationships, causing significant harm to ourselves and those around us. This is a great day for freedom!
1. Timelines
Do you get impatient presuming things arenât moving fast enough? Impatience is an unhealthy tie that can corrode the fabric of even the strongest relationships! When we struggle with impatience, we often prioritize immediate gratification over the long-term well-being of the partnership. Impatient behaviors can manifest as being short-tempered, demanding quick results, or constantly pressuring one's partner. These actions create tension, erode trust, and hinder effective communication. Impatience can also lead to impulsive decision-making, causing significant rifts in the relationship as important issues are not given the time and attention they deserve. By fostering patience and understanding, individuals can create a nurturing environment where growth, compromise, and trust can flourish.
Empowering Belief Suggestion: I can relax and be calm. When progress isnât fast enough for me, I can trust God that He is working behind the scenes. Godâs presence is my safe and calm retreat.
2. Comparison
In a society that glorifies perfection and success, we can fall into the trap of comparing ourselves and our families and kids to others.Comparisons can drive a wedge between us, and breed insecurities, resentment, and a constant feeling of inadequacy. When we compare our relationships to others, we fail to appreciate the unique qualities and dynamics within our partnerships. Instead, we should focus on cultivating gratitude and celebrating the strengths and growth in our relationships, fostering an atmosphere of love and support.
Empowering Belief Suggestion: Even if it doesnât feel fair I can trust in Godâs justice. I choose to smile and accept and expect abundance and promotion for my life and family. I am not alone, I am in partnership with God and His friendship vindicates me.
3. Hidden Agendas
Hidden agendas can be sneaky, and we donât even know we have them. Sub-consciously we are tied to unspoken expectations and agendas. These hidden motives can sabotage the authenticity of our connections and complicate our relationships with manipulation. All this, without even trying!
It is crucial to be transparent and genuine in our intentions, communicating openly and honestly with our spouses, kids, and friends. The best way to be free of hidden agendas is to resist fear regarding others. The other important approach is to resist the temptation to think that others need to share the same values and convictions as you. This can be challenging when youâre in the same family!
Empowering Belief Suggestion: Even though I have dreams, desires, and good ideas for my family and friends, I release them to have their own dreams and their journey. I trust Jesus to speak to their hearts, and I let go of my opinions.
4. Vices
Unhealthy relationships often involve the presence of vices such as addiction or substance abuse. These destructive habits can erode trust, communication, and overall well-being within a relationship. Vices can create a toxic environment that is detrimental to personal growth and the vitality of the relationship. Breaking free from these vices includes having empathy for yourself and others and creating goals and asking for help and support.
Empowering Belief Suggestion: I am not a disappointment to God, myself, or others. When I crave comfort, I immediately move toward my friendship with God in my secret place. I let go of the addictions that give me false comfort.
5. Distractions
In a world filled with constant stimulation and demands on our attention, it is crucial to recognize the impact of these distractions and actively work to mitigate their influence. By prioritizing uninterrupted quality time, fostering open and attentive communication, and practicing mindful presence, we can navigate the distraction-filled landscape and build healthier and more fulfilling connections. Embracing intentional engagement with our loved ones allows us to forge deeper bonds and create a sense of belonging in an increasingly distracted world.
Empowering Belief Suggestion: I am courageous and wise. I value the gift of each day and the time Iâve been given. I forgive myself, and I focus on whatâs important.
6. Limited Beliefs
Itâs so important to be aware of our inner dialogue! We can have unhealthy ties to our narrative, and remain unaware of the implications! The stories we tell ourselves create the trajectory of our lives. Telling yourself positive and life-giving faith-filled stories about your life, your future, the people around you, and your future is powerful and gives space for hope, possibilities, and answers to prayer.
Empowering Belief Suggestion: I write the truth in my heart thatâs in complete agreement with Godâs promise for me and my future. I invest in heart beliefs that establish peace and wealth and Lordship with Jesus.
7. Resentment
Resentment breeds emotional distance, leading us to withdraw and withhold. Breaking the unhealthy ties of resentment is a powerful step toward newfound freedom! Lingering resentment prevents genuine closeness and impedes the cultivation of empathy and compassion. The emotional disconnection can manifest in a lack of affection and withdrawal. Overcoming resentment necessitates a willingness to empathize with one another's experiences, puts nerdy into practice, and fosters an atmosphere of emotional safety and support, and acceptance.
Empowering Belief Suggestion: I sent away the offense of what that person said or did to me. This offense is not benefiting my life, and I donât give it any more power. I turn and move towards the peace of Godâs presence and I experience mercy for me, and I extend that mercy to others.
Music by lemonmusicstudio from Pixabay.
https://www.audreyclub.com/
https://www.lovemarriedlife.com/podcast
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