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This is the follow-up episode to deepen ideas in the interview with Danielle Aubin last week on Autistic Therapy.
Especially focused on this idea of relational trauma, and relational healing that addresses it. In my experience, relational healing ends up being woven throughout all other healing. Or, sometimes it's the "boss battle" to put what I've integrated into practice. Because emotional regulation during conflict with someone you care about is a whole new level!
While I didn't use the words "community model of healing" or "relational healing" when I was starting the Like Your Brain community over a year ago, they were certainly on my mind. More on that in the episode as well.
There are so many layers to relational healing. Wherever you're at with it is totally fine! And there are many ways to approach it.
Animals are also a lovely way to experience relational healing. My first cat cured like 60% of my relational trauma <3
Resources:
Transcript DocEmail NewsletterLike Your Brain community spaceHosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Danielle Aubin is an autistic therapist who works with autistic clients. And also shares about Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder (OCPD) and how it's strangely compatible with capitalism because of its orientation toward achievement.
Other big topic is community building, and how it can be healing even when it's uncomfortable (in the right way).
Relational healing is necessary for relational trauma, whether in the therapeutic relationship, or in a group setting!
Connect with Danielle:
Website: myautistictherapist.comTikTok @myautistictherapistCommunity: Late-Discovered Autistic Support & Learning GroupResources:
Course: Experimenting Your Way to an Extraordinary LifeTranscript DocEmail NewsletterLike Your Brain community spaceHosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Fehlende Folgen?
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A few ideas for accommodating your brain & needs around gift-giving and the holidays.
Fun fact: Many of us have gone through a big minimalism stage!
Please take care of yourself this season, whether that looks like unmasking or grey rocking ;)
p.s. I have a public wish list and absolutely love practical gifts! It's a fun way to support the podcast :)
Resources:
Transcript DocEmail NewsletterLike Your Brain community spaceHosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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You deserve to survive this. Please stay.
And if staying out of spite helps you, it has gotten me through some tough times.
My Medium article, "Please Stay, We Need You"
Crisis Resources:
USA-based anonymous crisis chatInternational crisis linesVarious types of crisis resources in about 10 countriesResources:
Transcript DocEmail NewsletterLike Your Brain community spaceHosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Have you absorbed the cultural idea that you "should" be able to be "present" without sensory aids? Fuuuuuuck that shiiiiit!
Also been playing with sensory seeking (& its opposite) during moments of transition, and it's helping a LOT!
Been considering the earplugs I mention, Loops? They're my fave currently. (Note: if you don't like anything in your ears, you won't like these, either.)
They have some deals right now, and you can support the podcast by using my affiliate link here.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Thinking seasonally about gratitude in the context of..... everything happening right now.
It's easy for my brain to want to solve every problem in the world.
But I don't want to do the opposite of becoming entirely insular and only focusing on myself.
I've found gratitude to be a way I can be more deeply interconnected (and in my case, add more reasons to want to live).
Mentioned in episode:
Ep 25 The Power of Honest GratitudeEp 72 Feeling Safe in Uncertainty & ChaosUnmasking Autism book by Devon Price (affiliate link)Resources:
Transcript DocEmail NewsletterLike Your Brain community spaceHosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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AuDHDers often end up partly or fully self-employed. It can be due to desire, or out of necessity.
Either way, this episode covers some tips to think about before starting. It may also be helpful if you've started businesses before and fallen for some bad advice (which I have).
Mentioned in Episode:
The interviews with Zann and Sam about their businessesThe book Profit First (ebook & audiobook) - affiliate links Course: Experimenting Your Way to an Extraordinary LifeResources:
Transcript DocEmail NewsletterLike Your Brain community spaceHosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Feeling worried about the future? Uncertainty can be especially difficult for Autistic nervous systems.
Today I go into more detail about WHY & HOW safety in the body can be a foundational practice for healing and wellness.
At the end, I share the audio of a practice that is also on YouTube here if you'd like to follow along with visuals.
The questions answered in this episode:
What is safety in the body?Why is it so important, and what does it do?What does it feel like?How does it relate to stress?What's my experience of safety been?What are the long-term effects of consistently reinforcing embodied safety?Mentioned in episode:
YouTube video showing me doing the embodied practice& explanation video + visuals (audio also from this episode)Gymba balance board & travel Bosu ball (affiliate links)Resources:
Like Your Brain community spaceTranscript DocEmail NewsletterHosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Sam Cooper is an AuDHD coach and generally awesome human. When we met in person, we bonded over having worn the wrong size shoes for years, which led to the title of this episode.
Sam shares about building a small business, and the upsides and downsides of a coaching business in particular.
Sensory needs and discovering support tools.
They also have an incredibly compassionate approach to their own journey.
Connect with Sam:
Sam's websiteSam's Instagram @unconventionalmindsadhdResources:
Like Your Brain community spaceTranscript DocEmail NewsletterNew course: Experimenting Your Way to an Extraordinary LifeHosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Zann's artist business is one of the easiest things she's ever done. And it's not even her main passion!
Her deeply relatable history includes ten years of feeling like failure soup. It didn't feel like progress or learning, just failure. But it ultimately led her to figure out what does NOT work.
She shares amazing ideas and practical advice.... this will be a great one to listen to more than once!
Connect with Zann:
Paws by Zann websiteZann's blogYouTube art tutorials & BTSResources:
Like Your Brain community spaceTranscript DocEmail NewsletterNew course: Experimenting Your Way to an Extraordinary LifeHosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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If you struggle to figure out what to focus on with bigger goals, you're not alone! Here's one approach I've come up with for my own annual goals in particular. And some thoughts on decision making, since that's part of it.
Wish List for bday (or whenever)
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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I failed my first driving test! On a technicality! Ah, the frustrations of begging to exist in structures not built for us.
Three quick stories about bureaucratic bullshit in a single week, and how it fits into my own big ball of yarn.
It's okay that the stuff that's hard for us is probably never going to be fun or easy.
We need support and RESOURCES that work for us! More on finding good resources in the episode... librarians are often a great place to start.
Resources:
Like Your Brain community spaceTranscript DocEmail NewsletterNew course: Experimenting Your Way to an Extraordinary LifeHosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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The autistic / AuDHD self-discovery journey can feel like finding out that you've been hammering screws this whole time. You never learned how to use the right tools. You may not have been given the right tools at all!
A few thoughts on the grief inherent in the process, and how to equip your personal toolbox now that you know what's up.
Resources:
Like Your Brain community spaceTranscript DocEmail NewsletterNew course: Experimenting Your Way to an Extraordinary LifeHosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Weeks and months are staples of scheduling systems. But they tend not to work well for me as units of time.
My personal ideal is two days on, two days off, though that's impractical. Instead, I talk about the various workarounds I've found, including intentionally scheduling rest (and how if I don't have time for that, I need to decrease demands).
If weeks don't work well for you, how can you find what does?
Resources:
Like Your Brain community spaceTranscript DocEmail NewsletterNew course: Experimenting Your Way to an Extraordinary LifeHosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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This episode is about both why it's so hard to get help as an AuDHDer,
and some of the broad steps I see working for us.
It can help to have a view of your "big ball of yarn" i.e. complex and interrelated problems or life areas.
It can also help to start addressing your sensory needs, core needs, and just live your life while you take a break from big processing.
Please take care and be gentle to yourself!
Links mentioned:
New course: Experimenting Your Way to an Extraordinary LifeYour Core Self Care Need episodeThe 4 steps I talked aboutCrisis Resources:
USA-based anonymous crisis chatInternational crisis linesVarious types of crisis resources in about 10 countriesResources:
Like Your Brain community spaceTranscript DocEmail NewsletterHosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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What NOT to do in your AuDHD discovery process is just as important as knowing what to do! This episode interweaves nicely with last week's episode about what AuDHDers need.
This is hardly an exhaustive list, but it covers many of the patterns I've seen and heard in the community.
Links mentioned:
InterGifted: What is Giftedness?Autistic Culture PodcastFree Office Hours call (p.s. being a free Patreon member is the best way to get updates/reminders about these calls)Crisis Resources:
USA-based anonymous crisis chatInternational crisis linesVarious types of crisis resources in about 10 countriesResources:
Like Your Brain community spaceTranscript DocEmail NewsletterHosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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What do AuDHDers need (beyond the obvious needs all humans have)? And why do those needs matter?
This episode covers some important ones:
Being able to engage with our interests (in a particular way)Executive Function support, without trying to make the hardest things easy or enjoyableAutonomyTrue restThe narrow path of just enough stimulationProcessing timeTo be witnessed in just the right wayRecognition that our needs vary quite a bit day to dayComing to terms with disabilitySpace and time throughout our self-discovery journeySafe enough spaces to explore what it means to be ourselfLinks mentioned:
Executive function test post if you want to ask Qs or share your experienceExecutive Skills Questionnaire Revised (ESQ-R)Unmasking Autism book (affiliate link)Crisis Resources:
USA-based anonymous crisis chatInternational crisis linesVarious types of crisis resources in about 10 countriesResources:
Like Your Brain community spaceTranscript DocEmail NewsletterLove Your Brain courseHosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Almost all of us consider formal diagnosis in our AuDHD discovery journey. Whether it's ADHD-focused for medication, or Autism-focused for validation or accommodations.
Knowing why you want the diagnosis goes a long way in figuring out what to pursue. The main options as I currently see them are:
full formal neuropsych testingprovisional diagnosis with a shorter screening testa formal letter requesting accommodations from your providerself-diagnosiscommunity diagnosisThis episode talks about
The upsides and downsides of diagnosis in generalMy personal diagnosis experience (two full rounds of neuropsych testing)Options to approach decision-making for yourselfHow to get started if you do want diagnosisQuestions from the longer decision-making process in the episode are in the Transcript Doc
Crisis Resources:
USA-based anonymous crisis chatInternational crisis linesVarious types of crisis resources in about 10 countriesMonotropism resources:
Monotropism Questionnaire and more info about itMonotropism explainedFergus Murray's 6 Starting Points for Understanding Autism034 Monotropism Might Explain Everything with Fergus Murray035 How Much Time Does Creating Take?039 Autism "Levels" and MonotropismOther Links mentioned:
Devon Price's post about Autism diagnosis pros n consThrow Away the Masters Tools: Liberating Ourselves From the Pathology Paradigm by Nick WalkerAuDHD Flourishing Resources:
Like Your Brain community spaceTranscript DocEmail NewsletterHosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Bonus drop from The Curiosity Cure podcast:
Today's conversation with Mattia takes us through their journey with chronic pain, feeling better, and the ways they navigate their inner mindbody conversation as someone with AuDHD + PDA. We touch upon themes of neurodivergence, gender transition, resourcing inner + external safety. We chat about using hypnotic techniques to decrease a sense of threat/unsafety that may accompany disorders like ehlers-danlos syndrome and POTS.
Thanks to Deb for sharing this episode: full show notes here
The show notes link above has many resources about successful healing from related conditions
The Curiosity Cure podcast site
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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I'm taking the last two weeks of August off, and will be back in September with a "back to the basics" series about things like diagnosis, what to do when you first discover your AuDHD identity, etc!
In the meantime, you can check out...
Like Your Brain community spaceTranscript DocYouTube: The Longer Road, Mattia guesting on other podsHosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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