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On this episode of Bad Associations, Eva catches up with Chev. They delve deeper into Chev’s experiences of being reproved twice before she was disfellowshipped, along with why the reproving process didn’t have the effect that she or the elders hoped for. They also discuss her strained family dynamics and the uncomfortable struggle with relatives who are still in the organization trying to manipulate her into allowing a one-dimensional relationship with her son, and they talk about some of the awesome things that have contributed to living an actual and authentic 'best life ever' on the outside. For more of Chev’s origin story, please also listen to Episode 1: “I’m Chev”
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Today, Brian is speaking with Adrian Green, host of the Greener Grass Podcast. Adrian was a 4th generation Jehovah's Witness, raised in it from birth. But at an early age, he realized he was gay. This discovery about himself is what prompted him to first doubt that the Witnesses had the truth; not simply because of his sexuality, but because of the Witnesses' response to it when he reached out for help. In this episode, we go on that journey with him.Link to the Greener Grass Podcast on YouTube:https://www.youtube.com/@GreenerGrassPodcast-ce9qk
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Fehlende Folgen?
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This month, Eva interviews Amara who was raised as a witness by a single mom in a less-than-ideal home situation where she was eventually kicked out of after choosing to attend college and later join the Air Force. Amara tells us about her self-defined Spiritual Journey to deprogram from The Witnesses and the process of learning to use critical thought. We discuss beards, time cards, territory records, and the parallels between The Organization and “The Capitol.” Amara also discusses a documentary towards the end of the episode; she later found and sent us a link to share which is below.
https://buy.hereliesthetruth.com/products/truth-be-told-director-s-cut
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In this episode Eva interviews Amber, who tells not only her own story, but also, with permission, shares some of her twin sister’s story as well. They both were raised as witnesses and left as adults, neither of them realizing they didn’t want to go back until after they had been out for a while. Amber talks about her relationship with her family, leaving her two abusive marriages, helping her sister, and finding a new partner and chosen family that accepts her just the way she is.
In addition to the general triggers that often come up in the stories of Ex-JW life, Amber and her sister’s story also requires an additional content disclaimer as there is discussion throughout of ongoing child sexual abuse and suicide attempts. Please use discretion regarding if and when you choose to listen to this episode and as always, please utilize healthy support systems whenever appropriate, such as www.rainn.org and www.nami.org
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Jacqueline grew up in California, where her parents owned a business in the San Francisco Bay area, but lived two hours away in a very rural town. What made her initially question the organization was her friendship with two gay teenagers in high school, ultimately leading her to take part in that school's Gay-Straight Alliance club unbeknownst to her parents or other witnesses in the congregation. She was baptized at 18, an disfellowshipped at 22. For several years, she was still a believer in the organization despite being disfellowshipped, but that all changed in 2020.
We talk about all of that and more, so I hope you stick around.
Please be advised, there are mentions of child sexual abuse and pets being killed in this episode. If that's something you might be sensitive about, keep that in mind before listening.
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In this episode, Brian speaks with with Lyndon. Lyndon was born in Australia to a Pioneer couple who sacrificed so much for the organization that it plunged their family into poverty. We talk about what it was like growing up in that environment, what happened when he told his parents he was leaving the organization, the steep learning curve the world threw him when he was young, and how growing up in that environment drove him to succeed financially. We also talk about how traumatized one can be without realizing it later in life.
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On this episode, Brian interviews Isabelle. Isabelle was born into the cult as a fourth-generation witness. Eventually, she broke down and began reading the ex-JW subreddit. Within a week, she had woken up totally.Brian and Isabelle talk about the difficulties she faced and still faces with her 'people pleaser' personality, how to deal with toxic people in your life, and much more.NOTE: Segments of this episode contain discussion of sexual exploitation and abuse of a minor, self-harm, and untreated mental illness. This segment begins at 1:04:29 and ends at 1:21:47.If you need help, the following resources are available to residents of the United States:The National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-4673Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration: 1-800-662-4357If you are currently in crisis, call or text 988.
If you’d like to share your story you can send a voice memo by clicking HERE , by emailing me at [email protected], DMing me on Instagram @badassociationspod or schedule time for us to chat by clicking HERE
The views expressed on the Bad Associations Podcast are solely from the recollections of the guest themselves.
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It’s our first Halloween Special!
In this episode, Chev, Brian, and Eva talk about Halloween from our unique perspective as former Jehovah’s Witnesses. We share our experiences dressing up in costumes, going to Halloween parties, the paranormal, and many more of our “firsts.” We were fortunate to have some of our former and (hopefully) future guests join in the conversation as well, including:
Troy - https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/badassociationspod/episodes/Im-Troy-e1no6l7
Brittany - https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/badassociationspod/episodes/Im-Brittany-e2107rn
Annie - https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/badassociationspod/episodes/Im-Annie-e259aun
Hannah -
https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/badassociationspod/episodes/Im-Hannah-e26bvlf
Cristina -
https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/badassociationspod/episodes/Im-Cristina-e29faed
Isabelle - Upcoming: To be released 11/4
Also joining in were Drake, Michael, Anna, Krystal, and Mo. Thanks everyone for contributing to the conversation!
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On this episode, Brian speaks with Cristina. Cristina was introduced to the cult by her mother who was an adult convert. She was baptized at 8 years old, but never really "fit" the culture with respect to being closed off from the world. She grew frustrated by the hypocrisy and the amount of attention the Witnesses paid to the appearance of things pretty early on and also struggled under the regime of what she calls her "helicopter parent" mother. We talk about how difficult it was for her to make friends, even in the Kingdom Hall, facing a judicial committee for being kidnapped and assaulted, dealing with the initial guilt over celebrating holidays, and much more.
If you’d like to share your story you can send a voice memo by clicking HERE , by emailing me at [email protected], DMing me on Instagram @badassociationspod or schedule time for us to chat by clicking HERE
The views expressed on the Bad Associations Podcast are solely from the recollections of the guest themselves.
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In this special episode, Eva breaks the format and talks to her friends, Heather and Hope, from the previous two episodes. The Davies Sisters discuss their journey of reconnecting with each other as adults after they were both finally free of the Witnesses. This episode bounces between both serious and silly, and we had so much fun recording it!
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In this episode, Eva interviews Hope.
Hope grew up as a Jehovah’s Witness and talks about the toll that experience has taken on her mental health and relationships over the years. They discuss her marriage and its demise, an inappropriate intervention, and Hope’s struggle to accept that she didn’t actually want to get reinstated. Hope also shares some resources (links below) that she found helpful in the process of leaving and getting where she is today - a happy, educated, well-traveled, and fulfilled ex-JW in a healthy relationship.
Shiny Happy People Documentary: https://www.amazon.com/gp/video/detail/B0B8TR2QV5/ref=atv_dp_share_cu_r
Bible Brother Podcast: https://open.spotify.com/show/5b4PHVqAj8XAtkH0FSy7Zd?si=3fc6529ef7654f54
Release & Reclaim Support Group: https://open.spotify.com/show/5b4PHVqAj8XAtkH0FSy7Zd?si=3fc6529ef7654f54
Cultish Book (from Hether’s episode): Cultish: The Language of Fanaticism: Montell, Amanda: 9780062993151: Amazon.com: Books
If you’d like to share your story you can send a voice memo by clicking HERE , by emailing me at [email protected], DMing me on Instagram @badassociationspod or schedule time for us to chat by clicking HEREThe views expressed on the Bad Associations Podcast are solely from the recollections of the guest themselves.
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In this episode, Eva interviews Hether. They discuss her first meeting at 8 years old and how her family became "picture perfect" until she started getting in trouble. She got reproved for getting pregnant in her teens and then got disfellowshipped later on. She came back to the organization to give it an honest try before leaving for good in her mid-20s. They also discuss the complexities of dealing with her parents prior to finally cutting them off.As mentioned in the intro the CSA content warning (in case anyone wants to skip that portion) starts roughly at 26:00 and ends around 31:57.
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Brian interviews Eva, a new Guest Host of Bad Associations. Eva was born to Witness parents and despite several spiritual falls over the years, didn't leave the Organization until her mid-30's. She discusses some of her history of being "in" and as she exited, as well as some of the ways the organization has changed in the 11 years between when Brian left and when she did in 2017.
Crisis of Conscience Audiobook: https://open.spotify.com/show/2mhhSfJrHnbserYbyfnFj7?si=960da1b7a4b640d9
Hamster Dance https://youtu.be/6WpMlwVwydo?si=fYzWvEe7aBaUsl3E
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In this episode, Brian interviews Hannah. Hannah and her husband have been physically and mentally out of the organization for about a year, now. Her husband started questioning her a little bit before she did, and once she revealed her feelings to him, they faded together. We talk about the gossip Hannah and her husband endured from their so-called friends, the reasons they were ultimately shunned despite no judicial committees or disciplinary action on the part of the elders, and we talk about Hannah's early life, being raised as a 6th generation Jehovah's Witness in a prominent family.
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This week, Brian interviews "Governor." Governor has been physically and mentally out of the cult for over 50 years. He started to question the religion at 9 years old, and at 15 made a declaration that he won't set foot in a Kingdom Hall ever again--which he has stuck with. Brian and Governor discuss what was going on in the Witness organization in the 60s and 70s and his journey through life, his education, service in the Royal Air Force, his conversion to Anglicanism, then to Catholicism, then leaving religion altogether, and his interactions with the Witnesses throughout.
If you’d like to share your story you can send a voice memo by clicking HERE , by emailing me at [email protected], DMing me on Instagram @badassociationspod or schedule time for us to chat by clicking HERE
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On this episode of Bad Associations Podcast Brian speaks to Annie who is physically out, mentally out and has been for about 3 years now.
Throughout our conversation, Annie shares her experiences growing up in a household where her mother took the spiritual "lead" since her father was not a Witness. Due to their achievements in the congregation--pioneering, the ministry school--her family was often held up as a shining example within the congregation.
From an early age, Annie realized she was not attracted to men. In addition to that, she didn't see herself continuing as a Jehovah's Witness, and at just 13 years old, she presented a formal case--an actual written list--to her mother, explaining why she needed to leave.
Annie also opens up about the pressure she faced when her grandfather's death pushed her towards baptism, but at the age of eighteen, she saw the future that awaited her as a Witness and made the decision to pursue higher education as her first step out of the cult. When her grandmother left the country to pursue missionary work, she moved into the vacated apartment to house-sit. It was at this point, she began truly living a double life.
We talk about the strict view of disfellowshipping within her family and the profound impact it had on her relationships with non-JW relatives.
As Annie adjusted to "worldly" customs and traditions like holidays, birthdays, and even gambling, she discovered the toll that her upbringing had taken on her mental health.***Trigger Warnings: We briefly discuss a 2-year-old child she used to babysit who was murdered. We talk about JW memorial service awfulness and don't go into detail about the actual murder.If you’d like to share your story you can send a voice memo by clicking HERE , by emailing me at [email protected], DMing me on Instagram @badassociationspod or schedule time for us to chat by clicking HEREThe views expressed on the Bad Associations Podcast are solely from the recollections of the guest themselves.
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On this episode of Bad Associations Podcast Brian is speaking with one of his closest friends, Jane. Jane and Brian grew up together in the cult, attending the same congregation for the majority of our teen years. Jane is the younger sister of Matt and Angie from the previous two episodes, so some of this might sound a little familiar. We talk about what it was like growing up with witness and non-witness parents and the differences between the two households, what it was like for her to hit puberty and suddenly have a target on her back, being falsely accused of promiscuous behavior by older women in the congregation despite only being 12 years old. We cover the circumstances leading her to leave home at 17, start her life and career before the age of 20, coming to grips with the abuse she suffered as a child, and ultimately meeting her husband, who has been a very positive aspect of her life for the past 15 years now. I really enjoyed this interview, as it helped me better understand my friend as well as helped her get some things out in the open, and I hope you enjoy it and get something out of it as well.
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This week on Bad Associations Podcast Brian talks with Angie. She's been out of the organization for around 20 years now. She was very devout when she was younger but ran into some personal struggles and as a result was disfellowshipped multiple times. We discuss her early years growing up as a Witness, the struggles she went through during her exit, and life as a parent raising children outside of the organization.
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On this episode of Bad Associations Brian chats with POMO Matt. He has been out of the cult for around 20 years. In this episode, we talk about his experience as a stepchild in a prominent JW family, his struggles with his sexuality, and his very long journey out.If you’d like to share your story you can send a voice memo by clicking HERE , by emailing me at [email protected], DMing me on Instagram @badassociationspod or schedule time for us to chat by clicking HERE
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On this episode of Bad Associations Chev chats with POMO Brian who has been out of the cult for 14 years. He started questioning the faith around 24 years old while studying The Daniel Book in 2006. He left soon after in 2008 after having no one to confide in. We discuss The Watchtower's inconsistencies, birthdays, Thanksgiving, being inactive and making friends outside of the organization.
**Special note at the beginning of the episode on some changes in the podcast!**If you’d like to share your story you can send a voice memo by clicking HERE , by emailing me at [email protected], DMing me on Instagram @badassociationspod or schedule time for us to chat by clicking HERE
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